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(New York Daily News)   Most people would probably allow this for $95 million   (nydailynews.com) divider line 239
    More: Sick, St. Louis, St. Louis Post-Dispatch  
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43829 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jun 2011 at 7:26 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-06-13 12:17:59 AM  
lol, something similar happened at a crappy pizza place i worked at almost 20 years ago....

You could have bought the whole joint for less than 100k

The moral is work for a perv at a major corporation.

You know now that i think of it, I worked at a movie theater where the manager had the girls with the nicest butts clean his office. The routine was he gave them a dust buster and had them crawl around on the floor cleaning under the desks....I'd forgotten that until i was about to hit add comment .
 
2011-06-13 12:19:10 AM  
Butterface.
 
2011-06-13 12:19:48 AM  
hah, i just thought of another thing to say.....

I wonder what the going rate for this is in Vegas....and why the jury wasnt required to use that as a basis for determining the damages.....
 
2011-06-13 12:23:57 AM  
Why would they print a pic of the victim?
 
2011-06-13 12:24:30 AM  
You're supposed be screwing your employees, not masturbating on them!
 
2011-06-13 01:05:55 AM  
What in the hell was the jury thinking? You want the award to be big enough they fix their practices but $95 million + fees is ludicrous.
 
2011-06-13 01:16:21 AM  

strangeguitar: Why would they print a pic of the victim?


So Farkers know whether they can fap to this story or not?

FTA: Nearly a year after she was hired, she claimed, he came up to her in the stock room and whacked her on the head with his penis.

Not that sexual assault is in any way funny, but this mental image made me burst out laughing
 
2011-06-13 01:17:55 AM  
Like most Daily News stories, this one is weak. It doesn't mention anything about criminal charges against the guy, which is the first thing I'd do if I was sexually assaulted. It does mention he hasn't worked there since the incident. So what is the $95M for, HR forgetting to return a phone call about inappropriate nicknames?

/100% straight, but I'd just like to go on record that I'd blow another guy for $95M.
 
2011-06-13 01:35:28 AM  

Gwendolyn: What in the hell was the jury thinking?


Step 2: Get masturbated on at work as soon as I get off this jury.
 
2011-06-13 01:40:08 AM  

SpeshilEdjukashin: Like most Daily News stories, this one is weak. It doesn't mention anything about criminal charges against the guy, which is the first thing I'd do if I was sexually assaulted. It does mention he hasn't worked there since the incident. So what is the $95M for, HR forgetting to return a phone call about inappropriate nicknames?

/100% straight, but I'd just like to go on record that I'd blow another guy for $95M.


Inappropriate nicknames AND inappropriate touching.

And yeah, precisely. If they could prove that they took appropriate actions after the first complaint, they might have avoided this.
 
2011-06-13 01:43:14 AM  

miss diminutive: but this mental image made me burst out laughing


Yeah me too. Who goes around penis whacking their female subordinates?
 
2011-06-13 02:22:50 AM  
That's not too shabby of a payout. Something tells me she will recover from any mental anguish from these events.
 
2011-06-13 02:33:06 AM  
Dude, $95 Million?

How can I get someone to smack me in the head with their cock, then lift my shirt and masturbate on me? Hell, for $95 Million, a good ass reaming wouldn't be out of the question.

...without Lube!
 
2011-06-13 02:34:52 AM  

violentsalvation: miss diminutive: but this mental image made me burst out laughing

Yeah me too. Who goes around penis whacking their female subordinates?


El Kabong fell on hard times... couldn't afford the guitar anymore...
 
2011-06-13 02:47:20 AM  

violentsalvation: Who goes around penis whacking their female subordinates?


Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?
 
2011-06-13 03:07:51 AM  

doglover: Gwendolyn: What in the hell was the jury thinking?

Step 2: Get masturbated on at work as soon as I get off this jury.


Wouldn't you get masturbated upon when you get off the jury?

On a side note, she was hit in the head with her boss's penis? How short is she/tall is he?
 
2011-06-13 03:22:52 AM  

Paris1127: On a side note, she was hit in the head with her boss's penis? How short is she/tall is he?


How sitting down WAS this girl?
 
2011-06-13 03:30:13 AM  

Ender's: Paris1127: On a side note, she was hit in the head with her boss's penis? How short is she/tall is he?

How sitting down WAS this girl?


lol, win.
 
2011-06-13 03:34:46 AM  
What I want to know is what the REAL story was here.

Hypothetical situation: I whack you with my bare penis right on your head at work and you CONTINUE WORKING FOR THE REST OF THE DAY!?!?!

Second, I hold you down and masturbate on you against your will and you're covered in my love tadpoles and you DON'T GO TO THE farkING COPS!?!?!

I mean, the woman's side of the story must be something farkin' completely different than the article is reporting because as it is, I'm of the opinion that she was literally asking for it. Not in a rape apologist way, but as in vocalizing words like "Do something nasty to me, baby." to the boss fellow. 'Cause really, if you bop someone in the head with your penis and masturbate on them, they can call the cops in every case but the one where they invited you to do so first.
 
2011-06-13 04:42:42 AM  
ollierosser.files.wordpress.com
 
2011-06-13 05:19:51 AM  
I'm in St. Louis, never heard of the company in question. Perhaps she was just from here, and worked for them in another state.
 
2011-06-13 05:30:22 AM  
Lucky Dog...
 
2011-06-13 06:25:00 AM  
I would suck a dick for 95Million, and I'm not particularly gay.
 
2011-06-13 06:41:32 AM  
I predict this thread will turn into a list of what degrading things people would be willing to endure for 95 million dollars.

And most of these posts will end with the phrase "and I'm not even gay!".
 
2011-06-13 07:11:52 AM  
She told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution that the award was likely to be capped because of federal law and will be closer to $40 million, plus attorney fees.

More like MINUS attorney fees. Tort fees to the attorneys are usually a percentage of the payout.
 
2011-06-13 07:18:14 AM  

miss diminutive: I predict this thread will turn into a list of what degrading things people would be willing to endure for 95 million dollars.

And most of these posts will end with the phrase "and I'm not even gay!".


I was just gonna pin the thread down and whack off all over it, myself.
 
2011-06-13 07:26:10 AM  

Ender's: I was just gonna pin the thread down and whack off all over it, myself.


I guess every man has their price. I'd be a little gay for $95 million and let the guy whack me in the head with his penis then masturbate on my chest.
 
2011-06-13 07:31:02 AM  
Be honest with yourselves. Most of you would do it for the cost of a plasma TV. Punitive damages aren't about how big a whore most of you are.
 
2011-06-13 07:32:39 AM  
FTA -- The company dismissed the award as a classic case of a "runaway jury." It also described the former manager as a "total jerkoff."

/Ashley don't like pearl necklaces.
 
2011-06-13 07:33:52 AM  
Personal dignity is worth more than $95 million dollars. It doesn't really have a monetary amount that can be assigned to it.
 
2011-06-13 07:35:05 AM  
I guess the manager that she was a rental.

I have NO sympathy for Aarons. Slimy group, they are. (Turned down two offers from them).
 
2011-06-13 07:39:48 AM  
LowbrowDeluxe: Be honest with yourselves. Most of you would do it for the cost of a plasma TV. Punitive damages aren't about how big a whore most of you are.

But does the TV do 3D? It's important, these farkers aren't going gay for some regular TV.
 
2011-06-13 07:42:44 AM  
I'm a man and I'd let him "hit me on the head with his genitals"
I'd pretty much let anyone do anything to me for 95 million.
 
2011-06-13 07:45:57 AM  
Isn't Aaron's one of those rip off 'Rent To Own' places preying upon the stupid and poor making them pay super high interest rates on crappy electronics and furniture? Like $1200 for a Blu-Ray Player after everything is said and done?

I think they can afford it, and quite possibly a few of the jurors purchased some of their crap.
 
2011-06-13 07:46:06 AM  
She won't see 95 million - doubt she sees 5 million.
 
2011-06-13 07:48:38 AM  
I do love that the majority of the public is extremely upset about... the victim getting so much money. The right wing truly has done an incredible job sucking all the humanity, life, and resources out of America.
 
2011-06-13 07:49:14 AM  
My boss is my Dad.

So, no.

/Throw a 1 infront of that 95 and now we're starting to get into the ballpark... GODDAMN PUNS
 
2011-06-13 07:49:17 AM  
You've been spunk'd
 
2011-06-13 07:50:01 AM  
If you would suck a dick for $95 million, you'd suck a dick for a whole lot less. Or let him hit you with his penis, masturbate on you, etc etc.

We've established you're a whore, we are just negotiating the price.
 
2011-06-13 07:50:36 AM  
Not to be a buzzkill, but she's getting $95 million because sexual harrassment/assault is not allowed.
 
2011-06-13 07:51:39 AM  
How exactly does one hit somebody in the head with your penis?

There're some logistics here I'm missing.
 
2011-06-13 07:51:59 AM  
I don't hate my life enough to let someone hit me in the head with his penis and then masturbate on me for 95 million dollars.

Then again it hasn't been offered so I dunno.
 
2011-06-13 07:52:59 AM  

haterade69: I do love that the majority of the public is extremely upset about... the victim getting so much money. The right wing truly has done an incredible job sucking all the humanity, life, and resources out of America.


It really is an insane amount.

The sad part about it is the lady will be lucky to see a quarter of it after legal fees and taxes. Which is why the jury pumped it up.
 
2011-06-13 07:53:37 AM  
Given the fact that she worked the rest of the day after the alleged actions, shouldn't she just get a bonus about the equivalent of a bukkake actress?

Or, if this is the new rate for bukkake, I'm guessing there are a lot of parents giving their daughters career counseling.
 
2011-06-13 07:54:06 AM  

MugzyBrown: How exactly does one hit somebody in the head with your penis?

There're some logistics here I'm missing.


Ok, but this is gonna get kinky.

Imagine a chair. Now I want you to imagine a girl sitting in it. Now imagine a guy with his pants around his ankles standing up.
 
2011-06-13 07:54:36 AM  

SpeshilEdjukashin: Like most Daily News stories, this one is weak. It doesn't mention anything about criminal charges against the guy, which is the first thing I'd do if I was sexually assaulted. It does mention he hasn't worked there since the incident. So what is the $95M for, HR forgetting to return a phone call about inappropriate nicknames?

/100% straight, but I'd just like to go on record that I'd blow another guy for $95M.


another guy?
How much did you get for blowing the first guy?
 
2011-06-13 07:56:10 AM  

Ender's: Ok, but this is gonna get kinky.

Imagine a chair. Now I want you to imagine a girl sitting in it. Now imagine a guy with his pants around his ankles standing up.


It's just the way it was worded in the article like he snuck up behind here and hit her in the head.


With that being said, rather than doing the hit in the head with the penis + bukkake for $95mm, can I agree to just the being hit with a penis part for say $5mm?
 
2011-06-13 07:56:34 AM  
It just took one single pervert to bring down an entire multi-million dollar company.

Way to go, pervert. Way to go.,
 
2011-06-13 07:56:41 AM  

Third Day Mark: My boss is my Dad.

So, no.

/Throw a 1 infront of that 95 and now we're starting to get into the ballpark... GODDAMN PUNS


Look, for 95 million not only would allow it from my dad, I'd do it in lacy girlish lingerie, and I'm a dude.
 
2011-06-13 07:56:43 AM  

Ender's: MugzyBrown: How exactly does one hit somebody in the head with your penis?

There're some logistics here I'm missing.

Ok, but this is gonna get kinky.

Imagine a chair. Now I want you to imagine a girl sitting in it. Now imagine a guy with his pants around his ankles standing up.


I was gonna go with the lesser known, but, ultimately more hilarious "leap and swing".
 
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