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(Inside Bay Area)   God smites doomsday prophet Harold Camping with a stroke   (insidebayarea.com) divider line 235
    More: Obvious, Harold Camping, East Bay, god, Alameda, Family Radio, American Atheists, slices, prophets  
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23802 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jun 2011 at 10:36 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-06-12 11:03:17 AM
Even God wants him to STFU.
 
2011-06-12 11:04:02 AM

Felgraf: Having watched my girlfriend have a stroke at 24 (She's totally fine now, amazingly), I'm not sure I can rejoice/be pleased by this, since they're horrible, horrible things.

But I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a tinge of schadenfreude.


My own grandfather got killed by a stroke, but he didn't go predicting the end of the world to fleece people of their money and ruin their lives. So, my schadenfreude was definitely showing when I read TFA.
 
2011-06-12 11:04:07 AM
FTA: "That attempted prophecy..."

No, it wasn't an attempted prophecy; it was a prophecy. It turned out to be false (duh). That's like an attempted press release.

d1jeditech: Just hopes he stays alive until after his Oct. doomsday predication doesn't come true....


THIS.

Felgraf: But I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a tinge of schadenfreude.


And a little bit o' that.
 
2011-06-12 11:05:13 AM
As a Christian I am sorry that this happened to him.

As a human, I can't help but chuckle at the irony (and of course the headline).
 
2011-06-12 11:05:30 AM

Tentacle: you know what other medical issues often happen to 89 year olds?


Hitler?
 
2011-06-12 11:09:30 AM
Felgraf:

Having watched my girlfriend have a stroke at 24 (She's totally fine now, amazingly), I'm not sure I can rejoice/be pleased by this, since they're horrible, horrible things.


Then don't be. This is Fark, FFS. What did you expect? Tea & sympathy?
 
2011-06-12 11:10:53 AM
How convenient.

I gotta stroke so don't bother me anymore while I recover...
 
2011-06-12 11:13:14 AM

offmymeds: "I'm sure Mr. Camping is thinking right now that he wants God to receive all the glory the for the ministry of Family Radio."

Camping was willing to only do a 50/50 split on the profits. God wanted 70/30.

God: "Oh yeah? TAKE THAT, MUTHA!"

Camping: "Mmmglorf hunh jnish..."


kunochan.com

I STILL fail to understand why God needs pieces of green paper that people pretend to give value to.
 
2011-06-12 11:14:12 AM
They believe in life after death but I'll bet they sent him to a hospital... Looks like life before death is still better, eh?
 
2011-06-12 11:14:13 AM
t1.gstatic.com
 
2011-06-12 11:16:26 AM

You Cant Explain That: Thank you God

I now believe, and I promise you I will never make fun of the stupid christians again



Why not? God does.
 
2011-06-12 11:17:40 AM
i16.photobucket.com

he is luke warm.... the lost 11th commandment, thou shalt either be hot or cold, luke warm displeases the lord
 
2011-06-12 11:17:44 AM

Queuebert: Tentacle: you know what other medical issues often happen to 89 year olds?

Hitler?



A God-Godwin!
 
2011-06-12 11:20:37 AM
The rapture, a little bit at a time.
 
2011-06-12 11:21:30 AM

Quantum Apostrophe: They believe in life after death but I'll bet they sent him to a hospital... Looks like life before death is still better, eh?


I beleive in life after death too, but this wanker doesn't want to go anywhere anytime soon, cause he's going to have to stand up in front of God and be judged for what he has done, and the lives he ruined.

I wouldn't be too quick to go either
 
2011-06-12 11:24:10 AM

oroku_saki: offmymeds: "I'm sure Mr. Camping is thinking right now that he wants God to receive all the glory the for the ministry of Family Radio."

Camping was willing to only do a 50/50 split on the profits. God wanted 70/30.

God: "Oh yeah? TAKE THAT, MUTHA!"

Camping: "Mmmglorf hunh jnish..."



I STILL fail to understand why God needs pieces of green paper that people pretend to give value to.


someone might beat me to it (and it would make me proud,) but:

George Carlin (new window)
 
2011-06-12 11:24:19 AM

d1jeditech: Just hopes he stays alive until after his Oct. doomsday predication doesn't come true....


THIS
 
2011-06-12 11:24:27 AM

oroku_saki: Farker T: FTA: "...and the only thing that's affected is his speech."


Holy shiat! There IS a God!

That's exactly what I was thinking when I read this. The headline should have read "God to Harold Camping: STFU!"


Odd. All I could think of is "What a fantastic way to keep all the cash but drop off the public's radar - fake a stroke that only affects my speech! I can quietly retire, rich as hell, while bolstering the claim that God exists! Brilliant!"
 
2011-06-12 11:26:31 AM

Queuebert: Tentacle: you know what other medical issues often happen to 89 year olds?

Hitler?


Is he going to asphyxiate in a chamber of his own hot air?
 
2011-06-12 11:27:16 AM

Aardvark Inc.: Felgraf:

Having watched my girlfriend have a stroke at 24 (She's totally fine now, amazingly), I'm not sure I can rejoice/be pleased by this, since they're horrible, horrible things.


Then don't be. This is Fark, FFS. What did you expect? Tea & sympathy?


Really.
He is a predatorial fear monger.
 
2011-06-12 11:27:41 AM

jsteiner78: he is luke warm.... the lost 11th commandment, thou shalt either be hot or cold, luke warm displeases the lord


i105.photobucket.com
wat
 
2011-06-12 11:29:05 AM
FTA: A GMC pickup with a Family Radio bumper sticker and a white Buick sat in the driveway.

Now there's some super-sleuthing right there...Glad that got reported.
 
2011-06-12 11:30:51 AM

FormlessOne: oroku_saki: Farker T: FTA: "...and the only thing that's affected is his speech."


Holy shiat! There IS a God!

That's exactly what I was thinking when I read this. The headline should have read "God to Harold Camping: STFU!"

Odd. All I could think of is "What a fantastic way to keep all the cash but drop off the public's radar - fake a stroke that only affects my speech! I can quietly retire, rich as hell, while bolstering the claim that God exists! Brilliant!"



You're obviously a cynical, heartless bastard.

I like that!
 
2011-06-12 11:31:29 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com

RIP BILLY SQUIER
 
2011-06-12 11:31:59 AM
I was just saying yesterday that just watch, we'll prove there is no god and then god will appear over the horizon with a giant troll face.
 
2011-06-12 11:34:06 AM
A real sign from God would be lightning striking his house and burning it to the ground on October 21st.
 
2011-06-12 11:35:46 AM
While it might seem a bit inappropriate, even rude, I laughed heartily at this.

/live long and suffer greatly, you worthless sack of shiat
 
2011-06-12 11:36:46 AM

0Icky0: Pro tip: If prayer actually worked, you wouldn't need anybody to handle the situation.


Pro tip: Prayer has never worked that way, nor has it ever been billed as such.
 
2011-06-12 11:37:39 AM

Martian_Astronomer: / Also, I hope you all realize that the fundamentalists are going to claim that this vindicates them, right?


You mean like they do with everything? The religious persons average mental gymnastics make Cirque du Soleil look like two Cerebal Palsy patients trying to climb a flagpole.
 
2011-06-12 11:38:36 AM
Hallelujah!
 
2011-06-12 11:38:55 AM
Much like his failed prediction, I guess you could say that this....
*puts on sunglasses*
...Was a stroke of bad luck.

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HH HHHH
 
2011-06-12 11:41:40 AM
As a fellow schizoaffective man, it kind of sucks he is going out as a delusional laughing stock, even with his multiple millions of dollars. I hate waiting hours in line to get the mostly rotten food the Christians give me. I hate being impoverished because I am mentally ill, and picking cigarette butts off the street and constantly trying to figure out how I am going to feed my son and pay people back. Screw it. This guy made bank off his mental illness and has already made it to 89. He has my respect, though I wouldn't trade my sanity (as schizo if fixable now-a-days with a pill or two) for his money. I would totally rip off idiots too though, and I think the sad thing is he isn't a dick, and honestly is just too crazy and senile to know he is a bullshiatter. Christian charity is a joke. It's just the trash they don't want usually. Let the f'ers be tricked into giving a crazy guy who probably can't work their money. He got a bit greedy with it, but in the end, I think I see some justice here from the opposite side of the coin the rest of fark doesn't see. This crazy guy made millions and probably had a mostly happy life. Shepherds eat sheep. It's what they do. I need a flock.
 
2011-06-12 11:42:42 AM

CanisNoir: 0Icky0: Pro tip: If prayer actually worked, you wouldn't need anybody to handle the situation.

Pro tip: Prayer has never worked that way, nor has it ever been billed as such.


Oh, and in what way does it work?
 
2011-06-12 11:43:21 AM

CanisNoir: 0Icky0: Pro tip: If prayer actually worked, you wouldn't need anybody to handle the situation.

Pro tip: Prayer has never worked that way, nor has it ever been billed as such.


Then Abraham prayed to God, and God healed Abimelek, his wife and his female slaves so they could have children again

Genesis 20:17
 
2011-06-12 11:43:23 AM

CanisNoir: 0Icky0: Pro tip: If prayer actually worked, you wouldn't need anybody to handle the situation.

Pro tip: Prayer has never worked that way, nor has it ever been billed as such.



So... how does prayer "work", then?
 
2011-06-12 11:45:51 AM

jsteiner78: he is luke warm.... the lost 11th commandment, thou shalt either be hot or cold, luke warm displeases the lord


I know what you mean. Why, just the other day at Starbucks...

www.mediabistro.com
 
2011-06-12 11:46:23 AM

lefty201: I beleive in life after death too, but this wanker doesn't want to go anywhere anytime soon, cause he's going to have to stand up in front of God and be judged for what he has done, and the lives he ruined.


This is the type of thinking I have a problem with. Did *he* ruin those lives, or did people making stupid decisions ruin their own lives?
Just because someone has a bunch of goods for sale, doesn't mean you *have* to buy them, and if you did and it turns out it was a stupid decision, it wasn't the salesmans fault, it was your own.


I hope he has a speedy return to health, has learned from his mistakes and that people can start taking responsability for their own actions.
 
2011-06-12 11:48:55 AM
(Psst, guys: CanisNoir is GatoNegro. Ignore the bait, he's caught enough for one lifetime.)
 
2011-06-12 11:49:55 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: God smites doomsday prophet Harold Camping with a stroke


Now his craziness will rest on a foundation of pricks and martyr.


I don't think martyism works like that. You have to get killed by someone to become a martyr, dying of natural causes doesn't count and might be seen by some people as God's way of punishing him.
 
2011-06-12 11:50:21 AM
Well, the world don't move to the beat of just one drum.
 
2011-06-12 11:50:24 AM
God moves in a mysterious way His wonders to perform


Incidentally, good move, god!
 
2011-06-12 11:50:33 AM
I really, really hope this guy survives...to see his revised prediction turn out to be utter bullshiat.
 
2011-06-12 11:52:05 AM
While the thought is amusing, I rarely believe in divine intervention.
 
2011-06-12 11:52:07 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2011-06-12 11:52:13 AM
Where's your god now?
 
2011-06-12 11:53:39 AM

Farker T: So... how does prayer "work", then?


Prayer 'works' by nothing at all happening when you pray, and then you randomly pick something positive and attribute that to the result of your prayer.
 
2011-06-12 11:54:14 AM

CanisNoir: lefty201: I beleive in life after death too, but this wanker doesn't want to go anywhere anytime soon, cause he's going to have to stand up in front of God and be judged for what he has done, and the lives he ruined.

This is the type of thinking I have a problem with. Did *he* ruin those lives, or did people making stupid decisions ruin their own lives?
Just because someone has a bunch of goods for sale, doesn't mean you *have* to buy them, and if you did and it turns out it was a stupid decision, it wasn't the salesmans fault, it was your own.



www.dickipedia.org


^Approves this message^
 
2011-06-12 11:56:36 AM

Relatively Obscure: Then Abraham prayed to God, and God healed Abimelek, his wife and his female slaves so they could have children again

Genesis 20:17


I don't think putting the dude God chose to reveal himself to as an example of "prayers are always supposed to be answered" is such a good move. I mean, Abrham was Gods BFF, so of course he's going to go out on a limb for him.


cygnusx13: Oh, and in what way does it work?


Farker T: So... how does prayer "work", then?


I would suggest you speak to a theologian about it. Either a Priest or a Rabbi, depending on if you're looking for New Testament or Old Testament answers. However, Prayers has *never* been a garunteed "Fix All". Most cures of that type were considered Heretical bordering on Witchcraft really.
 
2011-06-12 11:57:26 AM

ChasingPi: Shepherds eat sheep. It's what they do. I need a flock.


I'm not quite sure if I should Favorite you or run screaming ...
 
2011-06-12 11:58:16 AM

glassbottomboatcaptain: Farker T: So... how does prayer "work", then?

Prayer 'works' by nothing at all happening when you pray, and then you randomly pick something positive and attribute that to the result of your prayer.



So it's a lot like my lucky acorn, then!

rlv.zcache.com

Thanks!
 
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