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Some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 5/15 - 5/21 
Posted by Drew at 2011-05-24 2:58:37 PM (19 comments) | Permalink

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3257 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 May 2011 at 3:04 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



From Unfreakable:

No update from Drew this week, enjoy the headlines.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2011-05-15 to Sat 2011-05-21:

www.fark.com  Carnival worker falls to his death from Ferris wheel. If you can guess how much he weighs, you win a teddy bear    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Is that a needle in your pocket or are you just Hep C to see me?    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  The reason for the hasta la vista? Baby    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Virus leaked social security numbers of unemployed, offering identity thieves chance to get turned down for credit    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  People, don't bring your seven-year-old to your drug deals. They usually can't lay down effective suppressing fire when you rip off the dealer    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Zoo animals face budget knife. And fork    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Ex-IMF chief Strauss-Kahn granted $1 million bail and will be confined to home detention. No word yet on whether he will have maid service    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Taliban kills 35 Afghan highway workers, fines doubled    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Gay Los Angeles police officer wins $1 million judgment in retaliation case. He thanked his legal team of Sailor, Construction Dude, Indian Chief, and Leather Guy with mustache, and also Tom Cruise for some reason    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Researchers find whales speak in accents to their extended family. Scientists listen by use of podcast    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Pope makes first-ever phone call to bless astronauts. He says even though Catholics in space are weightless, they still need mass    img.fark.net


Sports:

www.fark.com  Indian blind cricket team to tour Pakistan, play against other sight-impaired teams. First match is against the Pakistani intelligence team tasked to find Bin Laden    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Yo dawg, we heard that Oklahoma linebacker Austin Box passed away, so we'll put Box in a box so you can mourn while you can mourn    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Jason Giambi hits three home runs and becomes second-oldest player to hit three home runs in one game in MLB history. Best use of wood by a middle-aged man since Arnold Schwarzenegger    img.fark.net


Geek:

www.fark.com  Gene fights cancer, but also causes cancer. What the hell is your problem, Gene?    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Scientists discover bacteria strain that kills blood-suckers. The sparkling. Ends. Now.    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  The 10 best cars for audiophiles. I thought a full sized Dodge van with no windows...oh, AUDIOphiles, nevermind    img.fark.net


Showbiz:

www.fark.com  Lady Gaga gets "honorary degree" from MTV. The University of Phoenix suddenly seems much more credible    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Jake Gyllenhaal sues over photoshopped underwear photo. After viewing photo, judge decides case will be heard in small claims court    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Katy Perry forbids chauffeurs from making eye contact with her. If only there were some distractions to keep the chaffeurs from looking into her eyes    img.fark.net


Politics:

www.fark.com  The effect of Huckabee's pullout on Bachmann could turn 'er campaign into overdrive, although we ain't see nothin' yet    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Newt Gingrich's campaign may be on its deathbed as GOP donors dump him for more attractive candidates    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Romney: Obama threw Israel under the bus. In Obama's defense though, in Israel that's safer than being on the bus    img.fark.net


Music:

www.fark.com  Duran Duran forced to cancel the opening dates of their UK tour due due due due due due due due due due due due due due due to laryngitis    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Actual headline: "Justin Bieber To Create Female Scent." Isn't that a given?    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  50 Cent reveals that he was adopted; will begin search for his birth parents, George Washington & Susan B. Anthony    img.fark.net


Business:

www.fark.com  De Beers gets new CEO. They shoulda gone with Ditka. Definitely Ditka    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  University of Phoenix under investigation for illegal recruiting tactics, including forgetting to mention to potential students that a degree from the University of Phoenix is only one-ply    img.fark.net

www.fark.com  Toro's profits up 32 percent. OLE    img.fark.net
· · ·
(view entire blog)


19 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2011-05-24 03:16:33 PM  
Two really good sports ones this week. Indian Cricket team and Box in a box are gold.
 
2011-05-24 03:16:39 PM  
That Gingrich headline is WIN
 
2011-05-24 03:32:40 PM  

Langston: That Gingrich headline is WIN


Agreed.
 
2011-05-24 03:42:54 PM  
Duran Duran one made me lol, as did Gene.

What the hell is Gene's problem?
 
2011-05-24 03:46:28 PM  
Does this list include the ones that get yanked/deleted? For example, the Sarah Palin/RGA headline on the Politics tab this morning?

/Just askin'.
 
2011-05-24 03:47:20 PM  
The UofP got hit hard this week. Great job subby
 
2011-05-24 04:08:34 PM  
So where is Drew then? What does he do with his time?
 
2011-05-24 04:12:55 PM  

PanicMan: So where is Drew then? What does he do with his time?


Ironically, he gets work done while trying to slack off.
 
2011-05-24 04:27:37 PM  
Drew died. This is all a facade. A show. Wake up Sheeple.
 
2011-05-24 04:42:28 PM  

Langston: That Gingrich headline is WIN


The Gingrich headline is HOTY material.
 
2011-05-24 05:03:56 PM  

PanicMan: So where is Drew then? What does he do with his time?


Maybe he's back in court trying to defend his theft of patented web processes, all while enjoying a cool, refreshing Jose Cuervo™!

Jose Cuervo™: I plead sloshed, Your Honor!
 
2011-05-24 05:16:18 PM  
All three showbiz headlines were pure win!
 
2011-05-24 06:02:00 PM  
I snerted for the Duran Duran and 50 Cent headlines, but can someone explain the Dodge / audiophile one?
 
2011-05-24 06:07:46 PM  

Prattle Assassin: I snerted for the Duran Duran and 50 Cent headlines, but can someone explain the Dodge / audiophile one?


images.wikia.com
 
2011-05-24 06:13:07 PM  

Smiths: Drew died. This is all a facade. A show. Wake up Sheeple.


He died years ago. The US was just keeping him on ice so the President could eventually pull him out and win the election...

... oh, wait...

... nope, same guy.
 
2011-05-24 06:22:17 PM  

Prattle Assassin: I snerted for the Duran Duran and 50 Cent headlines, but can someone explain the Dodge / audiophile one?


it's a lame play on how the words pedophile/audiophile are similar.

/except that they're not
 
2011-05-24 08:18:06 PM  
Where was the twins sex study one?
 
2011-05-24 08:59:28 PM  

DeathBySmiley: PanicMan: So where is Drew then? What does he do with his time?

Ironically, he gets work done while trying to slack off.


If by "work" you mean "flying around the country hitting every bar known to man", then yes.

Friend him on FacePlant and track his drunken progress!
 
2011-05-25 02:03:27 AM  
I think the (paraphrase) headline "Mattress delivery truck sabotaged. That's sofa king low."

Was a winner. Should be here
 
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