This is stupid. Not because they didn't include the rams, but because it's stupid.

JerseyTim: OH DEAR GOD END THE LOCK OUT NOW MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP I DON'T THINK I CAN HANDLE JOHN CLAYTON BLABBERING ABOUT THIS CRAP MAKE IT STOP END THE GODDAMN LOCKOUT NOW

Actually, this could be material for a Kenny Mayne segment. "What will our NFL correspondents be left to do?". Clayton will start a relationship advice column, Schlereth will go into interior design, etc.

Cincinnati should be #1

4NSpy: This is stupid. Not because they didn't include the rams, but because it's stupid.




JC

4NSpy: This is stupid. Not because they didn't include the rams, but because it's stupid.

Snert.

Side note: My high school's football team had the "rams horns on helmet" thing going on in 1923. Unfortunately, the blue and gold color scheme was that of our arch rival, and as such we couldn't really do the "rams" thing on spirit day.

Also agree with you on the stupid bit; did anyone read the "fashion expert's" responses and think that they read like a.) she didn't understand the question, and b.) they were garnered in 5 minutes in the break room over coffee, and somehow fleshed out into an "article"?

/it's a side note cuz it's not a cool story

IAmRight: FFS, Cleveland's is in the top 10 and it's a solid color not even related to the team's name, which is also a color!

That was my WTF reaction, too. The Browns have the worst helmets in the NFL.

I kind of like the Vikings, Rams, and Bengals' whole-helmet designs.

This completely inane article almost makes me long for the subtlety and nuance of "Who's Now?"

Arxane: This completely inane article almost makes me long for the subtlety and nuance of "Who's Now?"

Did we ever find out who was the most now?

Sorry Vikings, Cowboys, Rams, Seahawks, and Cardinals (am I missing anyone?) but the Steelers, once again, reign supreme.

I thought it was a very well written article and all the participants put a lot of thought into their choices.

IAmRight: Why Would I Read the Article: Arxane: This completely inane article almost makes me long for the subtlety and nuance of "Who's Now?"

Did we ever find out who was the most now?

Wasn't it Tiger Woods at the time?

/sure wasn't very "now" shortly after

Apparently the "championship" went:

Championship
Tiger Woods def. LeBron James (65.1% - 34.9%)

Although there are some downright uncomfortable results in their first round. Like, Jeter dominating Sidney Crosby, and Matt Leinart even being included.

grinding_journalist: 4NSpy: This is stupid. Not because they didn't include the rams, but because it's stupid.

Snert.

Side note: My high school's football team had the "rams horns on helmet" thing going on in 1923. Unfortunately, the blue and gold color scheme was that of our arch rival, and as such we couldn't really do the "rams" thing on spirit day.

Also agree with you on the stupid bit; did anyone read the "fashion expert's" responses and think that they read like a.) she didn't understand the question, and b.) they were garnered in 5 minutes in the break room over coffee, and somehow fleshed out into an "article"?

/it's a side note cuz it's not a cool story

You sound old. Probably not fat, fat people don't live that long.

IAmRight: Why Would I Read the Article: Arxane: This completely inane article almost makes me long for the subtlety and nuance of "Who's Now?"

Did we ever find out who was the most now?

Wasn't it Tiger Woods at the time?

/sure wasn't very "now" shortly after

Colonel Sandurz: Try here. Stop.
Dark Helmet: What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?
Colonel Sandurz: Now. You're looking at now, sir. Everything that happens now, is happening now.
Dark Helmet: What happened to then?
Colonel Sandurz: We passed then.
Dark Helmet: When?
Colonel Sandurz: Just now. We're at now now.
Dark Helmet: Go back to then.
Colonel Sandurz: When?
Dark Helmet: Now.
Colonel Sandurz: Now?
Dark Helmet: Now.
Colonel Sandurz: I can't.
Dark Helmet: Why?
Colonel Sandurz: We missed it.
Dark Helmet: When?
Colonel Sandurz: Just now.
Dark Helmet: When will then be now?
Colonel Sandurz: Soon.
Dark Helmet: How soon?

The Dolphins helmet? The hell? That thing is terrible!

mitchcumstein1: Fark the Raiders.

KC fans bitterness helps sustain us. It might help if you chumps win a playoff game. You know, the thing you haven't done in about 17 years...

Raiders at number 3. Hell, I'll take what I can get at this point.

Oekss: The Dolphins helmet? The hell? That thing is terrible!

and the dolphin is wearing a helmet with a different logo than the dolphin helmet...it's very confusing.


shouldn't it be one of those infinite recursion deals

I realize I should probably go full homer and talk about why the Texans' helmet is so awesome, but honestly it looks like a color-blind cow trying to start up a Kiss tribute band.

opinion, bias, favorties blah blah...

I'm just glad to see the flying ice cream cone head of the Pats near the bottom. Terrible logo.

/I happen to like the Brown's helmet.
//Bears is the best

AdolfOliverPanties: So where do they rank the 6 teams that didn't even make the list?

Falcons, Titans, 49ers, Bengals, Texans, Cardinals

All tied for last?

TFA: In addition to the 49ers and Texans, the Tennessee Titans, Cincinnati Bengals, Atlanta Falcons and Arizona Cardinals were the only teams shut out by the eight voters.

Yeesh. I can think of 22 other helmets that are better than those 10.

So this monstrosity

Got a #1 vote and the Niners helmet which is stylistically the same as the Packers helmet got NO VOTES and only a "guest judge" nod?

So it was basically "Vote for the teams you like, regardless of the design on their helmets."

Got it.

/yes I am buttmad
//Niners Fan
///We're buttmad about a lot of things

GOD DAMMIT FARK!


Was the ugly helmet I tried to post.

Weird how 3 out of 4 NFC North teams make the top 10 but Detroit doesn't. I'd get rid of Miami and San Diego, put in Detroit and the Rams.

mitchcumstein1: Ken VeryBigLiar: mitchcumstein1: Fark the Raiders.

KC fans bitterness helps sustain us. It might help if you chumps win a playoff game. You know, the thing you haven't done in about 17 years...

Three sentences at almost a 6th grade level? Corcoran's GED program must be getting better.

At least Raider fans have the teeth to enunciate their sentances.

/whether they're in Chino, San Quentin or Folsom.

Screw this list, I'm making my own.

1. Rams
2. Chargers
3. Bengals
4. Seahawks
5. Lions
6. Eagles
7. Chiefs
8. Bears
9. Texans
10. Packers

IAmRight: FFS, Cleveland's is in the top 10 and it's a solid color not even related to the team's name, which is also a color!

Cleveland's name isn't a color. It's a surname that happens to be a color.

Oh shoosh...there will be football. Too much money at stake. Lockout will end just before preseason though, so training camps and whatnot will be lost, etc.

At least that's what 'should' happen. They risk seriously pissing off a LOT of people if they bail on the season or even lose some games. That "$9 billion industry" will be $8 billion real quick if fans start bailing out.

mitchcumstein1: I thought most meth addicts lost their teeth? They must have some sort of special meth in Oakland

They don't have any money left for meth after buying whiskey, shoulder spikes and shivs.

/Priorities...

Rams
Chargers
Cowboys
Packers
Steelers

Apples01: Cincinnati should be #1

Good lord no. They are second worst. The Pats are #1 obviously.

The steelers and browns are on the list because they are hipster choices. Sorry, the steelers logo isn't that cool or interesting and orange is just lazy.

duncangonuts: AdolfOliverPanties: So where do they rank the 6 teams that didn't even make the list?

Falcons, Titans, 49ers, Bengals, Texans, Cardinals

All tied for last?

no, the falcons, 49ers, bengals, texans, and cardinals are tie for second to last. it's farking clear that the titans have by far the worst farking helmet in the league. the visual abortion that is their flaming thumbtack design deserves to be mocked until they change it.

IAmRight: Troy McClure: Cleveland's name isn't a color. It's a surname that happens to be a color.

I didn't say it was based on the color. Brown is, however, a color.

I just like how its the surname of the owning family of a division rival. From the same state.

Mine:

Bears
Packers
Redskins
Raiders
Steelers
Chargers
Seahawks
Browns
Cowboys
Chiefs

mitchcumstein1: Ken VeryBigLiar: mitchcumstein1: Ken VeryBigLiar: mitchcumstein1: Fark the Raiders.

KC fans bitterness helps sustain us. It might help if you chumps win a playoff game. You know, the thing you haven't done in about 17 years...

Three sentences at almost a 6th grade level? Corcoran's GED program must be getting better.

At least Raider fans have the teeth to enunciate their sentances.

/whether they're in Chino, San Quentin or Folsom.

I thought most meth addicts lost their teeth? They must have some sort of special meth in Oakland.

I think he's referring to those fake gold "grillz" as teeth.

/fark the Raiders

Browns are the best. Theirs colors are that of autumn and Thanksgiving, which is when the game of football is played.

Having a logo on your helmet is sorta like how Applebees makes the employees wear 'flair'.

T.rex: Browns are the best. Theirs colors are that of autumn and Thanksgiving, which is when the game of football is played.

Having a logo on your helmet is sorta like how Applebees makes the employees wear 'flair'.

You are empirically wrong.

the best is the classic "Pat Patriot" design.
the second best is open for discussion

Oekss: Screw this list, I'm making my own.

1. Rams
2. Chargers
3. Bengals
4. Seahawks
5. Lions
6. Eagles
7. Chiefs
8. Bears
9. Texans
10. Packers

I'm sorry, you have the Chargers at the wrong end of the list.

(Rams? Really?)

I'm sorry, Imma let you finish your poll, but



Is the best helmet of all time.

AnEvilGuest: the best is the classic "Pat Patriot" design.
the second best is open for discussion

Yeah it's pretty good. However your present design is a vast world of suck, which takes a couple of points off of your claim. You're in the sh*tter there with Jacksonville, Titans, and Panthers...stylisticly speaking, of course.

Yes, the Redskins helmet rules, too.

bow to your master

Charger stuff is classy. Like San Diego.

Adolf Oliver Nipples: It has history, both with the team and with the steel industry as a whole. The Steelmark used to be the symbol of the industrial might of the United States. Hipsters wouldn't know what to say to a guy coming out of a factory covered in soot carrying a lunchpail.

I know the history. I used to live in Steelers country. Horrid place. I also know hipsters love carrying lunchpails ironically.

mtylerjr: I'm sorry, Imma let you finish your poll, but

Is the best helmet of all time.

Kind of like "Smallpox Blanket Night" was the best promo of all time.

Came here to lobby for the bengals, leave satisfied.

Helmets? Just hold your ears out of the way with some electrical tape.


It works well,
most of the time

Adolf Oliver Nipples: I'd give my right arm to be in Pittsburgh right now.

That's pretty sad.

Came here to say Rams.

Glad to see others thought the same. Hot only our they my current team - THEY INVENTED HELMET DESIGN.

Oldest in the game. And their design is simple and pretty damn timeless. Really nice. It can adapt but its always the same basic idea (like the smaller horn design).

Adolf Oliver Nipples: It has history, both with the team and with the steel industry as a whole. The Steelmark used to be the symbol of the industrial might of the United States.

We could update this for the 21st century, have Seattle put the Microsoft logo on their helmets.

More interesting than the "expert" choices are the readers' rankings.

Here's the page where you can rank all 32 helmets yourself. (new window)

My prejudices are for classic designs (Bears, Colts, even the Giants) and bold and/or unusual colors (Chiefs, Packers). Both the Rams and Bengals both go beyond the logo in the center of the helmet cliche, but the Rams do so much more successfully.

The look of the whole uniform is more important than the helmet alone. The Cowboys and Browns have uninteresting helmets, but they cap classically simple uniform designs. The 49ers color scheme and the Jets overall design shouldn't work, but they do.

What I don't like are those aerodynamic blurs and over-busy dark-on-dark blotches, the best of which, the Patriots, I downgraded because I prefer their old crouching-Patriot design (though it did raise the question, Why red? weren't the redcoats the enemies of the Patriots?).

Top five: Bears, Packers, Chiefs, Rams, Redskins.

Bottom five: Titans, Ravens, Panthers, Jaguars, Texans (by then I wasn't really putting them in any particular order).

ESPN users rank the Broncos, Texans, and Ravens much too high, and the Cardinals and Dolphins way too low.

/this is what happens when you drink too much coffee at night

Somebody had to mention it...

gimmeafarkinname: Somebody had to mention it...

Bucko Bruce is the most stereotypically gay professional sports mascot that I've ever seen. NTTAWTT, of course.

ok, I'm late to this but...
Best:
1.Buccaneers
2.Saints
3.Texans
4.Bengals
5.Lions
Worst:
1.Titans
2.Jaguars
3.Panthers
4.Redskins
5.Falcons

how is anyone ranking stealers anywhere near a top 10. it isnt even a top 25 helmet... its an all black helmet with circle containing 3 diamond shapes inside. WOW, AMAAAAAAAAAAAAAZING... /bore



/wish this was their everyday helmet

mtylerjr: I'm sorry, Imma let you finish your poll, but



Is the best helmet of all time.

Not even the best Redskin helmet.

SideOfBacon: how is anyone ranking steelers anywhere near a top 10.

FTFM
/need more C8H10N4O2 input

My childhood impression of the Steelers was that they were too poor to afford two stickers. The Browns? Couldn't afford any at all. Then again, the Bengals simply had their name written on the helmets at the time. The lid now isn't bad, but Stryper loses a bit with the Zubaz.

Love the old Seahawks, meh on the newer one. Same with the Block-D/Robodonkeys.

My top three in no particular order would have to be Rams, Jets, and Vikings. Bottom three Texans (white worked better), Patriots, and Jaguars.

what do you think would be the best and worst College Football helmets?
my picks would be..
best:
1.UNC
2.Michigan
3.UTEP
4.Arkansas

worst:
1.Boston College

Everydayiblasphorme: what do you think would be the best and worst College Football helmets?
my picks would be..
best:
1.UNC
2.Michigan
3.UTEP
4.Arkansas

worst:
1.Boston College

done in 2.
/go winged helmets!

SideOfBacon: how is anyone ranking stealers anywhere near a top 10. it isnt even a top 25 helmet... its an all black helmet with circle containing 3 diamond shapes inside. WOW, AMAAAAAAAAAAAAAZING... /bore



/wish this was their everyday helmet

Yup.

I remember Andre Tippet, Steve Grogan, Raymond Clayborn and many other great players in the old Pat Patriot look.
I don't just think of the Rod Rust type years before Bledsoe.

Might be harder for younger fans to think "Andre Tippet" when they see the throwbacks though.

I dunno. I'd have to add the 'Cuse to that worst list.

And, for lulz, I found this site:

http://vierdsen.wordpress.com/2008/07/15/vierdsen-pwns-the-helmet-quiz/

Hint: They forgot the second "c" in Connecticut.

SideOfBacon: how is anyone ranking stealers anywhere near a top 10. it isnt even a top 25 helmet... its an all black helmet with circle containing 3 diamond shapes inside. WOW, AMAAAAAAAAAAAAAZING... /bore

/wish this was their everyday helmet

Those "diamond-shapes" are hypocycloids.