FARK.com: (6175837) And we have a winner in the "Who's going to have the most fun time in prison?" contest

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		And we have a winner in the "Who's going to have the most fun time in prison?" contest (wpxi.com)		59
		More: Sick, indecent assault

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23661 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 May 2011 at 1:28 PM | Favorite | share:

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notmtwain		2011-05-06 09:57:31 AM

Was wondering why she actually went downstairs after getting a text-- From another version of the story:

According to police documents, an intoxicated Korpela made sexual advances toward a female youth who was sleeping in an upstairs bedroom at his house. He sent text messages to the female instructing her to come downstairs so he could spank her.

A girlfriend was asleep in the same room.

About 4:15 a.m. Saturday, he grabbed her by the wrist, made her go downstairs and forced her to undress. He bent her over a chair and spanked her with a wooden paddle with holes drilled in it.

Yes, he should be there when you go on shift subby.

Walker		2011-05-06 10:17:07 AM

"Hi Guys, what's going on in here?"
img.photobucket.com

doglover		2011-05-06 10:35:17 AM

Somewhat topical: In the newest episode of Adventure Time the Ice King becomes obsessed with marrying Princess Bubblegum. (Honestly, who wouldn't be? A smart, rich, royal co-ed whose hair is also a delicious chewy treat.)

But in the course of the show her body is broken up and only enough of her is recovered by doctors to remake her as a 13 year old. As soon as this is announced the Ice King quips "13!? I'm outta here!" and jumps out a window to escape.

I just thought that was a nice showing of sensibility from a man who has actually tried to marry a Hot Dog Princess.

SpaceyCat		2011-05-06 11:30:56 AM

They do not say how old the girl was, but since he was arrested, I'm assuming under 16...

Andrew Wiggin		2011-05-06 01:31:09 PM

how old is said jailbait?

chookbillion		2011-05-06 01:34:54 PM

That read like a letter to penthouse.

HotWingConspiracy		2011-05-06 01:47:02 PM

Eh, this sounds rather tame compared to what some guys are in prison for.

Mrs.Sharpier		2011-05-06 01:50:15 PM

"wooden paddle with holes drilled in it" -well, no shiat they were drilled in it

grinding_journalist		2011-05-06 01:51:12 PM

HotWingConspiracy: Eh, this sounds rather tame compared to what some guys are in prison for.

This, and...

More details on "was sleeping upstairs in his house"...was she a friend of his daughter? Certainly doesn't seem that way, as the story would have mentioned this if it were the case- so why the hell are two jailbait age girls "sleeping upstairs" in a 42yr old's house? Nobody else is "wtfing" that?

namegoeshere		2011-05-06 01:52:34 PM

What was she pledging?

cgraves67		2011-05-06 01:54:39 PM

What were they doing in his house? Step child? Girlfriend's daughter? Not that I'm blaming her, but WTF?

Salmon		2011-05-06 01:55:03 PM

The Babysitter

loki see loki do		2011-05-06 01:57:36 PM

Man, if she was under seventeen and not being naughty, this would be wrong.

Gentoolive		2011-05-06 02:04:12 PM

chookbillion: That read like a letter to penthouse.

Indeed, pics or it didn't happen..

blackmtnmantheonly		2011-05-06 02:08:39 PM

SMACK goes the weasel.

AntiNorm		2011-05-06 02:08:47 PM

How old was she?

From all I know after reading that article, she could have been 18, which would make this a non-issue.

spittman		2011-05-06 02:10:24 PM

Ah, my hometown. Aside from being the "Fireworks Capital of America", if it's in the news it's probably something pretty farked up. I was watching a talk show one time and they were talking about some kids bullying another kid in a wheelchair and knocking him down the stairs. And I thought to myself, what a messed up school that must be. Then they said it was Benjamin Franklin Jr High in New Castle, PA. Somehow, it didn't surprise me all that much.

buckeyebrain		2011-05-06 02:14:24 PM

namegoeshere: What was she pledging?

www.wigderson.com

/What is the polar opposite of 'obscure'?

ElPollotonto		2011-05-06 02:15:18 PM

Wow, the only thing with any detail in that article was "wooden paddle with holes drilled in it" - I guess someone had a deadline to meet.

Megain		2011-05-06 02:18:25 PM

Pictures from his Facebook profile (now with non-linking goodness).

GoodOmens		2011-05-06 02:24:45 PM

loki see loki do: Man, if she was under seventeen and not being naughty, this would be wrong.

Um even if she was legal, forcing someone to undress and then paddle them is still wrong.

zorlack7		2011-05-06 02:25:17 PM

Yeah, his facebook says he is inspired by the Dalai Lama, and Steven Segal.

Bad combination... Bad news.

thoreau		2011-05-06 02:28:50 PM

didn't RTFA because I'm on lunch at work and don't want to risk the link, but I'm curious if the headline means 'most fun' 'time' or 'most' 'fun time'. Could be a big difference there.

Aidan		2011-05-06 02:32:15 PM

Megain: Pictures from his Facebook profile (now with non-linking goodness).

Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

doglover: Somewhat topical: In the newest episode of Adventure Time the Ice King becomes obsessed with marrying Princess Bubblegum. (Honestly, who wouldn't be? A smart, rich, royal co-ed whose hair is also a delicious chewy treat.)

But in the course of the show her body is broken up and only enough of her is recovered by doctors to remake her as a 13 year old. As soon as this is announced the Ice King quips "13!? I'm outta here!" and jumps out a window to escape.

I just thought that was a nice showing of sensibility from a man who has actually tried to marry a Hot Dog Princess.

I have no idea what you're talking about, but it sounds fun.

JohnWayne'sMangirdle		2011-05-06 02:32:37 PM

thoreau: didn't RTFA because I'm on lunch at work and don't want to risk the link, but I'm curious if the headline means 'most fun' 'time' or 'most' 'fun time'. Could be a big difference there.

Don't bother. Not much to see there. Move along.

I am Ahab		2011-05-06 02:33:19 PM

Megain: Pictures from his Facebook profile (now with non-linking goodness).

www.zgeek.com

clytamnestra		2011-05-06 02:35:16 PM

he has 2 girls sleeping in his house, neither apparently related to him, who think nothing of coming downstairs to get whacked if he asks them too

homeless eastern-European prostitutes?

Knara		2011-05-06 02:36:22 PM

GoodOmens: loki see loki do: Man, if she was under seventeen and not being naughty, this would be wrong.

Um even if she was legal, forcing someone to undress and then paddle them is still wrong.

Your sarcasm meter is pretty weak, ain't it.

jst3p		2011-05-06 02:40:10 PM

Megain		2011-05-06 02:43:22 PM

Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

I'd try to explain it by showing you some of his posts, but a Mod would just delete it because it included personal information or something. Which makes me wonder about even linking to an article about him - doesn't that include personal information - like his name?

Hankie Fest		2011-05-06 02:48:08 PM

Megain: Pictures from his Facebook profile (now with non-linking goodness).

Came to post this... glad it's here already.

BeesNuts		2011-05-06 02:48:37 PM

Megain: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

I'd try to explain it by showing you some of his posts, but a Mod would just delete it because it included personal information or something. Which makes me wonder about even linking to an article about him - doesn't that include personal information - like his name?

Post as if it's your personal opinion and not his. I think you're well known enough that we'd notice that something funny was going on, at least.

Hankie Fest		2011-05-06 02:49:00 PM

Megain: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

I'd try to explain it by showing you some of his posts, but a Mod would just delete it because it included personal information or something. Which makes me wonder about even linking to an article about him - doesn't that include personal information - like his name?

And this. He's easy to access on FB... just type his name in and viola.

Kim-Chi_and_Blaze		2011-05-06 03:06:53 PM

Hankie Fest: Megain: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

I'd try to explain it by showing you some of his posts, but a Mod would just delete it because it included personal information or something. Which makes me wonder about even linking to an article about him - doesn't that include personal information - like his name?

And this. He's easy to access on FB... just type his name in and viola.

People who inspire Brad. Morihei Ueshiba, Dalai Lama, J.R.R. Tolkien and Steven Seagal....His activities include body building and sword fighting...

/Also has a couple juggalo friends with full makeup for their profile pics. Makes me think these girls were most likely homeless and he was letting them stay there in order to get some underage poon. Farking juggalos.....

feefifofimmy		2011-05-06 03:09:14 PM

Ah, yes. My hometown. Strangest place on the planet.

scrumpox		2011-05-06 03:17:01 PM

jst3p: GoodOmens: loki see loki do: Man, if she was under seventeen and not being naughty, this would be wrong.

Um even if she was legal, forcing someone to undress and then paddle them is still wrong.

She should have used the safe word.

Today's safe word: antidisestablishmentarianism

talulahgosh		2011-05-06 03:21:57 PM

doglover: Somewhat topical: In the newest episode of Adventure Time the Ice King becomes obsessed with marrying Princess Bubblegum. (Honestly, who wouldn't be? A smart, rich, royal co-ed whose hair is also a delicious chewy treat.)

But in the course of the show her body is broken up and only enough of her is recovered by doctors to remake her as a 13 year old. As soon as this is announced the Ice King quips "13!? I'm outta here!" and jumps out a window to escape.

I just thought that was a nice showing of sensibility from a man who has actually tried to marry a Hot Dog Princess.

what drugs are you on, and where can i get them?

Knara		2011-05-06 03:23:26 PM

Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

What the hell is a "Vampire sign"?

Megain		2011-05-06 03:24:38 PM

BeesNuts: I think you're well known enough that we'd notice that something funny was going on, at least.

Thanks, I appreciate the sentiment. Though I'd counter it with the concept that I'm well known and disliked enough amongst some of the Mods that it wouldn't matter. They've already proven to me that they're not impartial at all, so I have zero reason to trust them for a damn thing.

jst3p		2011-05-06 03:26:49 PM

Knara: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

What the hell is a "Vampire sign"?

www.salagraphics.com

jst3p		2011-05-06 03:27:31 PM

Knara: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

What the hell is a "Vampire sign"?

ecx.images-amazon.com

I am Ahab		2011-05-06 03:36:54 PM

talulahgosh: what drugs are you on, and where can i get them?

Link (new window)

Enjoy.

Aidan		2011-05-06 03:39:18 PM

Knara: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

What the hell is a "Vampire sign"?

Well jst3p has brought the snark, but for realz; people who LARP (pretend to be) vampires, often contort in weird and silly ways to display the spell they are under/casting/whatever.

I only know about vampire LARPs very third hand (by other LARPers mocking them), so I can't find any good links to show what I mean.

Kim-Chi_and_Blaze		2011-05-06 03:48:28 PM

Aidan: Knara: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

What the hell is a "Vampire sign"?

Well jst3p has brought the snark, but for realz; people who LARP (pretend to be) vampires, often contort in weird and silly ways to display the spell they are under/casting/whatever.

I only know about vampire LARPs very third hand (by other LARPers mocking them), so I can't find any good links to show what I mean.

Wow so they are mocked by LARPers? At that point suicide may be the only solution.....

burghboy		2011-05-06 03:52:53 PM

For what it's worth, the Ag Indecent Assault charge sounds like the victim was less than 16.

But if any of you are familiar with New Castle, PA, this wouldn't be a surprise in the slightest.

Burchill		2011-05-06 03:55:24 PM

I am Ahab: talulahgosh: what drugs are you on, and where can i get them?

Link (new window)

Enjoy.

Woah. That cartoon has corrupted my tiny mind.

feefifofimmy		2011-05-06 03:55:49 PM

burghboy: For what it's worth, the Ag Indecent Assault charge sounds like the victim was less than 16.

But if any of you are familiar with New Castle, PA, this wouldn't be a surprise in the slightest.

Aggravatingly familiar. Somehow, I escaped. My mom still lives there.

namegoeshere		2011-05-06 04:22:08 PM

buckeyebrain: namegoeshere: What was she pledging?

/What is the polar opposite of 'obscure'?

//Oblig.

buckler		2011-05-06 04:27:47 PM

Megain: Pictures from his Facebook profile (now with non-linking goodness).

He looks like the kind of guy the SCA says "no thanks" to.

jst3p		2011-05-06 05:09:02 PM

Kim-Chi_and_Blaze: Aidan: Knara: Aidan: Is.... Is he making Vampire signs in that first picture? Because that would be Fail upon Fail.

What the hell is a "Vampire sign"?

Well jst3p has brought the snark, but for realz; people who LARP (pretend to be) vampires, often contort in weird and silly ways to display the spell they are under/casting/whatever.

I only know about vampire LARPs very third hand (by other LARPers mocking them), so I can't find any good links to show what I mean.

Wow so they are mocked by LARPers? At that point suicide may be the only solution.....

They still get to mock cosplayers I think.

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