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(Some Guy)   Farker el_hueso locked down in mall while cops look for armed robber. Right now   ( divider line
    More: Scary  
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14215 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Aug 2003 at 3:29 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

527 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-08-08 04:57:40 PM  

If I was el_hueso I would be dressing up like a ninja right now stalking around my office throwing shadow kicks at the interns... until I actually saw someone with a gun, then I would scream like a silly biatch and run away.


Or, he could act like that Star Wars kid, grab a broom stick and pretend it's a lightsabre!!!
2003-08-08 04:57:47 PM  
FarkNBeans: That's it! He could ask for her "input" on the article and maybe even a demonstration!
2003-08-08 04:58:02 PM  
People are still walking around looking in the windows of the closed stores. I just walked out on the top level of the parking garage and gave the finger to the news chopper.

You are the wind beneath my wings.
2003-08-08 04:58:21 PM  
Skunk Eyes!!!
2003-08-08 04:58:37 PM  
Attention shoppers, nothing more to see here, please move along.
2003-08-08 04:58:56 PM  
Wait a minute... How do we know el_hueso isn't the guy? Fark could be his alabi.

*looks el_hueso over carefully*

Or better yet, maybe the cops just want to shoot up the Gap and needed an excuse! :-)
2003-08-08 04:59:07 PM  
Then he'll be pissed at you AND me!
2003-08-08 05:00:12 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-08-08 05:00:50 PM  
And that's the way it is, on this the 97 minute of the el_hueso hostage situation in Oregon...
2003-08-08 05:00:55 PM  
I've been wanting to shoot up the Gap for years... I didn't know all it took was becoming a cop and giving a fake perp description.

/Note to self.
2003-08-08 05:02:05 PM  
PowerSlacker: well, I guess now we all know where to run to if we are running from the cops.
2003-08-08 05:02:13 PM  

R.I.P el_hueso

Now he's dead???

Somebody check his profile and see if there is a skinny mustache or the possibility of a skinny moustache being painted on.

The black guy thing??? Anybody can fake THAT! :D :D
2003-08-08 05:02:23 PM  
Cops are leaving. Mall security says they think he isn't here. Duh! Sorry there wasn't some climax to this thread.
2003-08-08 05:02:35 PM  

Wait a minute... How do we know el_hueso isn't the guy? Fark could be his alabi."
And he's givin a finger to the news chopper in the sky.
He wants to do something crazy.
But he doesn't want to die.

Someone should write a song about this.
2003-08-08 05:03:43 PM  
He's obviously hiding inside one of those circular clothes racks. Every child knows they are the ultimate hiding place.
2003-08-08 05:03:50 PM  
No el_hueso It can't be over...
Go out in a blaze of glory!!!

2003-08-08 05:03:54 PM  
"I've been wanting to shoot up the Gap for years..."

Tell me about it, I just can't meet the right woman...
2003-08-08 05:04:27 PM  
Damn...out done again ...
2003-08-08 05:04:28 PM  

If you want a climax, go to the orgasm thread. GET IT? Haha, ha... I'll shut up now.
2003-08-08 05:04:29 PM  
Good to see you are alive oh noble headline poster.
2003-08-08 05:04:42 PM  
Turn yourself in man, it's not worth it ;)
2003-08-08 05:05:16 PM  
Not a bad way to end the work week... gracias el_hueso!
/an hour to go before the weekend
2003-08-08 05:05:46 PM  
If you would have taken the advice of your fellow farkers and touched yourself there might have been a climax to this story el_hueso
2003-08-08 05:06:07 PM  

I knew someone was going to take that comment that way, yet I still posted it like a fool.
2003-08-08 05:06:28 PM  

You suck. You didn't even die for Fark!

Your membership is now revoked. :P
2003-08-08 05:08:53 PM  
[Suspects in a line-up are asked to read a phrase.]
Cop: Number 1, step forward.
Hockney: 'Hand me the keys, you farking cocksucker.'
Cop: Number 2, step forward.
McManus: 'Give me the farking keys, you farking cocksucking motherfarker,' aaarrrghh!
Cop: Knock it off! Get back! Number 3, step forward.
Fenster: [Laughing.] 'Hand me the keys, you cocksucker!'
Cop: In English, please?
Fenster: Excuse me?
Cop: In English.
Fenster: 'Hand me the farking keys, you cocksucker,' what the fark?

Too bad Fark will filter this.
2003-08-08 05:09:02 PM  
The only thing that would make this thread better is if the criminal with the goofy mustache was ALSO a Farker and using his wireless laptop from a obscure air duct to report on how his life of crime was so exciting and cool...

Oh. That and another picture of someone giving the 'skunk eye'.
2003-08-08 05:09:18 PM  
I'm just sick over it not ending in some kind of ultraviolence. I was hoping for a shoot out on the sky bridge over the Ice Chalet. Oh well...the day's not over yet.
2003-08-08 05:09:53 PM  
PfizerX: and I also.... am a fool. It's a ship of fools.

I'm delirious at work and I still have one more day left to work.

el_hueso... where are you man... el_hueso...?

You were one of the good ones, friend.
2003-08-08 05:10:21 PM  
Darn it, now I want Karmel Korn, and here I am stuck in Seattle.
2003-08-08 05:10:33 PM  

Is your boss hot?
2003-08-08 05:10:56 PM  
Kaka- Not even luke warm.
2003-08-08 05:11:00 PM  
Never mind. There he is...

...and my day cleverly avoids another exciting turn.
2003-08-08 05:11:06 PM  
I'm confused because I have no idea what "Skunk eyes" actually are.

I've heard of the "Alabama look" but not "Skunk eyes" before.
2003-08-08 05:11:35 PM  

Does she at least dress nice?
2003-08-08 05:11:47 PM  
el_hueso should get a TOTAL FARK account for this.
2003-08-08 05:12:08 PM  
In a Marshall's kind of way.
2003-08-08 05:12:29 PM  
el_hueso, a shoot out on the sky bridge, with you filming it with a "borrowed" camera from Radio Shack = profit

I wish the 99% of Farkers in this thread had the visual we have of a shoot out over the Ice Chalet.

Have a safe weekend.
2003-08-08 05:12:59 PM  
You better watch out man, your boss is probably reading this.
2003-08-08 05:14:21 PM  
What would Tommy Vercetti do?
2003-08-08 05:14:23 PM  
2003-08-08 05:11:47 PM Webgrunt

or at least 15 minutes on "All Things Considered"...;)
2003-08-08 05:14:26 PM  
Why would his boss be reading this?
2003-08-08 05:14:31 PM  
So el_hueso...

If the gunman comes crashing in the door and starts poping caps - which would you most likely to do?

A. Shiate a brick
B. Jump put the window
C. Finish your Solitaire game
D. Jump an attractive co-worker
E. Ask the gunman to not shoot you but shoot your attractive co-worker
F. ?
2003-08-08 05:14:32 PM  

Quick! now's the time you go into one of the shops and beg for the poster they were given with the pic of the man on! Run!
2003-08-08 05:15:02 PM  
My boss can barely login so no worries there.
2003-08-08 05:15:17 PM  
"fark Martha Stewart."

-Brat Pitt from Fight Club

Fark will ALSO filter this
2003-08-08 05:16:34 PM  
Why wouldn't his boos be reading this? It's not like there is a law against boss' reading Fark. You gotta figure news has got around his office by now.
2003-08-08 05:16:47 PM  
Lionlegs: my thoughts exactly! Go el_hueso, go!
/Milking this event for all it's worth
2003-08-08 05:18:02 PM  
...this guy has to do the wanted level cheat, else hes gonna be runnin around with 5 stars., If any one sees aome one looking back and forth real quick or spinning in tight lil circles, thats your guy!1111111one
2003-08-08 05:18:11 PM  
El Hueso: Maybe you could go onto the roof and do the safety dance? Or, maybe go grab that secretary for a combat jack if the bullets start to fly.
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