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(Charleston Daily Mail)   Winner of largest Powerball jackpot loses $545,000 because he left car running outside a strip club at 2:30am   ( divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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31372 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Aug 2003 at 12:59 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

93 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-08-05 12:41:11 PM  
This is the dumbest man alive.
2003-08-05 12:49:36 PM  
All I can say is...damn.
2003-08-05 12:54:54 PM  
Common sense != (for sale)
2003-08-05 01:00:39 PM  
Where ARE these stupid men when I'm single???
2003-08-05 01:01:25 PM  
dumb: Morris said deputies were told Whittaker was a regular patron of the club and "frequently lavished money on different people at the bar."

dumber: "(Whittaker) gambles quite a bit..."

but not all bad, i guess: Since then, he has established a charity, The Jack Whittaker Foundation. The foundation has given away at least $3 million to area churches.
2003-08-05 01:02:48 PM  
Very innovative: Tell the police you lost 800K and hope to recover it all.

Dr. Evil: One Million Dollars
2003-08-05 01:02:58 PM  
candypants, if you're thinking of cruising west virginia strip clubs in search of eligible men, here's a piece of advice:

2003-08-05 01:03:43 PM  
easy come, easy go...

he'll be broke in no time.
2003-08-05 01:05:08 PM  
Fool + Money = Fool - Money
2003-08-05 01:05:47 PM  
2003-08-05 01:05:56 PM  
why do i always rob the SUV's -without- half a mill in cash?
2003-08-05 01:06:50 PM  
Gah - I want to forget about the millionaire that won 170 million. Stop making the news, asshat.
2003-08-05 01:06:59 PM  
Hey may be stupid, but at least he is giving some of the money to charity.
More than I can say about some of you "holier than thou" farkers out there.
2003-08-05 01:07:40 PM  
Oh, this was that guy who was already stinking rich before he won the biggest farking lottery in history. Yeah, he's probably pretty used to just parking his giant SUV wherever the hell he wants and damned if it gets in anyone elses way.

No sympathy whatsoever.
2003-08-05 01:08:14 PM  
It was $545,000 and he got it back.
WTF with the headline?
2003-08-05 01:08:42 PM  
Why do the biggest bumf/ucks allways win the lottery.. what a bastard
2003-08-05 01:08:48 PM  
He's kind dumb.
2003-08-05 01:09:54 PM  
What's the over/under on this character being brought up on rape charges, and then sued?
2003-08-05 01:11:51 PM  
Where ARE these stupid men when I'm single???

Reight here, although I don't have much money to be stupid with...

2003-08-05 01:12:39 PM  
They found everything in a dumpster behind the club.

2003-08-05 01:13:21 PM  
i wouldnt have a navigator if i had that kinda loot.
erm maybe.. but the Helly Hansen edition.

or maybe a nice Acura NSX.. classy but not overdone.

anyone wanna make me rich? we ought to concoct a way to make one farker rich. then.. well.. something cool.
2003-08-05 01:13:50 PM  
It's amazing how loud money talks. He hangs out in strip bars - I don't think the churches he's giving money to (they sound rather right-wing fundy to me) would probably have coronaries if their parishioners were hanging out at strip clubs. Then again, you flash some ching under their noses, and in an instant they have no problems with strip clubs. What a bunch of hypocrites!

To bad this idiot can't by himself a clue with all the money he now has.
2003-08-05 01:15:35 PM  
Whoops... "I don't think the churches he's giving money to (they sound rather right-wing fundy to me) would probably have coronaries if their parishioners were hanging out at strip clubs.

Should be "I think the churches he's giving money to..."
2003-08-05 01:16:12 PM  
Hey MadDad,

funny is you quoting the Cramps in your bio and then saying how nice it is he is giving money to charities. Lux and Ivy are not real big fans of jesus. Pick a side.
2003-08-05 01:19:14 PM  
asshat ->
2003-08-05 01:20:09 PM  
Yep, he did get the money back -- he's *extremely* lucky. And if he wants to throw his money away on strippers, I guess that's his prerogative. (Gotta feed that economy!)

"Although Whittaker told reporters at the scene today that he had been carrying about $800,000, Morris said the deputies, with the help of a private investigator, located $545,000 in some brush behind a Dumpster on the club's lot."

The issue should be: what kind of an asshole carries $550-800K around as spending cash? And if he's telling the truth, which lucky stripper got the 'missing' quarter mil? Enquiring minds wanna dig dirt.
2003-08-05 01:21:59 PM  
Screw him!
Instead of giving money to those churches, spend it on me. I'm not fickle, I'll never damn him to hell, and I won't molest little boys.

I prefer older men.
2003-08-05 01:23:44 PM  
This guy is going to single-handedly save the economy.
2003-08-05 01:24:03 PM  
In other news, Anna Nicole Smith has decided to move to Charleston.

Me thinks she'll fit right in.
2003-08-05 01:25:42 PM  
Guy Incognito:

Well his heart may be in the right place, but I wouldn't trust a dime to a church, as it wouldn't probably ever go to a person that needs it, except a possible kitchen, but I doubt it. Might fix up the church, or send silly christrians to an early grave in a foreign country trying to peddle their 'beliefs'.
2003-08-05 01:27:30 PM  
This is the same man who hired Nelly to "rap" to his granddaughter as the first thing he spent any of his money on.

/said granddaughter recently gave birth to curiously nappy-haired child
2003-08-05 01:29:50 PM  
"The crime scene resembled a movie production as detectives fingerprinted and searched a Dodge Intrepid and lined the perimeter with yellow police tape."

Cars have fingerprints now? Dayum, thats techonogickal...
2003-08-05 01:31:07 PM  
Even though I'm a guy, I'm thinking of getting a job as a stripper at the club that this guy frequents.....he's obviously stupid enough to give me some of his money even if I do look like one of the guys in the Full Monty.......
[image from too old to be available]
/would do just about anything for a chunk of $800,000
2003-08-05 01:31:26 PM  
I wonder if he was drinking at the time?
2003-08-05 01:31:33 PM  
Sorry, no time to post now... buying online ticket to Charleston WA... what color was that Navigator again?

Ticket, check
Leather Gloves, check
Hammer, check
Map of area Strip Clubs, check

Talk to all you loser after the weekend, have fun!
2003-08-05 01:31:54 PM  
Fark the farkin farker
2003-08-05 01:32:20 PM  
Wouldn't tithing be ten percent, or over 30 million?

Not that I'm criticizing how he spends his money . . .
2003-08-05 01:32:23 PM  
My question, if somebody takes the trouble/risk to break into a car and finds a boatload of cash, why not take it and hit the road? "Dumbass" on both sides.
2003-08-05 01:33:04 PM  
I submitted this tagline:

"Thieves steal record Powerball winner's earnings outside strip club. Easy come, easy go."

Maybe funny, maybe not but definitely 13 minutes too slow.

/shakes fist
2003-08-05 01:33:55 PM  
"She said lottery officials do give lottery winners general advice about protecting themselves.

"We are not financial advisers," she said. "We do, however, tell our winners that they should consult with an attorney and with an accountant, get their phone number unlisted and think carefully about how they will approach life as a jackpot winner."
yeah... biatches and blow... sign me up !!

2003-08-05 01:34:18 PM  
A fool and his money are soon partied.
2003-08-05 01:35:56 PM  
lordargent: LOL -- clever!
2003-08-05 01:36:30 PM  
This guy was a millionaire BEFORE he won the lottery. You think he cares about 545,000? Not as much as you or I.

On another note, I thought it was illegal to carry over 20k in cash!?!?
2003-08-05 01:37:23 PM  
why so much money at a strip club...he could of just bought a hoooker...
2003-08-05 01:37:35 PM  

I *completely* expected to go to that website and see a cartoon drawing of the guy (like the rich Texan-type guy that shows up on Simpsons on occasion) holding wads of cash with a shiat-eating grin on his face.

Alas, I was disappointed.
2003-08-05 01:38:36 PM  
This was farking pocket change for this guy.
2003-08-05 01:39:34 PM  
Here's a visual for the creatively impaired

[image from too old to be available]
2003-08-05 01:40:46 PM  
sorry - But, I think he looks plenty silly in real life.
2003-08-05 01:42:29 PM  
patdaddy, hilarious!
2003-08-05 01:44:28 PM  
$245000 + ($100000*3) = $800000

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