FARK.com: (6039528) Scientists discover a 250-million-year-old naked trilobite orgy preserved in a fossil. Rule #34, what can't you do?

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		Scientists discover a 250-million-year-old naked trilobite orgy preserved in a fossil. Rule #34, what can't you do? (mnn.com)		40
		More: Spiffy, University of Cincinnati

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7952 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Mar 2011 at 10:35 AM | Favorite | share:

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40 Comments (+0 »)

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Andrew Wiggin		2011-03-17 10:37:16 AM

'i'm here for the gangbang'

BurnShrike		2011-03-17 10:39:11 AM

That's how I want my remains to be found in 250 million years.

bump		2011-03-17 10:39:14 AM

Call the Jimmy Castor Bunch?

/gottafindawoman, gottafindawoman, etc.

BrokenToilet		2011-03-17 10:40:09 AM

is that a challenge subby?

preciousmetal		2011-03-17 10:41:06 AM

And they were smited by god for their fornication.

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros		2011-03-17 10:41:08 AM

Damn. If only I was trilobisexual.

To The Escape Zeppelin!		2011-03-17 10:41:44 AM

Trilobite eyes were made of crystal. Fun fact.

moops		2011-03-17 10:42:16 AM

stacye		2011-03-17 10:42:39 AM

I need more coffee. I read that as 250-million-year-old naked tribble orgy.

hogans		2011-03-17 10:43:37 AM

BurnShrike: That's how I want my remains to be found in 250 million years.

I want my fossil to be the only intact one found in the area. The male fossils would all have crushed skulls; the women, shattered pelvises.

God Is My Co-Pirate		2011-03-17 10:44:24 AM

hogans: BurnShrike: That's how I want my remains to be found in 250 million years.

I want my fossil to be the only intact one found in the area. The male fossils would all have crushed skulls; the women, shattered pelvises.

Death by snoo-snoo.

rat_creature		2011-03-17 10:44:27 AM

Scandalous!

/hot like the Permian
//seriously, though, trilobites are awesome.

eViLpOpTaRt		2011-03-17 10:45:58 AM

As long as she was willing, I'm okay with it.

Feyfolken		2011-03-17 10:47:32 AM

BurnShrike: That's how I want my remains to be found in 250 million years.

In the middle of a trilobite orgy?

dennysgod		2011-03-17 10:50:47 AM

The All-Powerful Atheismo		2011-03-17 10:52:22 AM

It can't get me laid

fc02.deviantart.net

m1ke		2011-03-17 10:53:54 AM

BurnShrike: That's how I want my remains to be found in 250 million years.

This. None of that "huddled over for warmth" crap for me.

tothekor		2011-03-17 10:59:44 AM

Great. Even extinct arthopods are having more fun than I am.

hitlo58		2011-03-17 11:02:13 AM

preciousmetal: And they were smited by god for their fornication.

*smitten.
/i cant tell if your trolling or just stupid.

epic_bitch		2011-03-17 11:03:55 AM

As a paleontologist, I can only say... fap.

BurnShrike		2011-03-17 11:04:45 AM

hitlo58: preciousmetal: And they were smited by god for their fornication.

*smitten.
/i cant tell if your trolling or just stupid.

*you're
/I can't tell if you're trolling or just stupid.

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 11:23:45 AM

We need more pics!
Here in Ottawa, my friends and I find the occasional death pool:

sites.google.com

Erix		2011-03-17 11:23:51 AM

Considering trilobites went extinct about a million years before that, I'm guessing it's not your typical orgy. More like a cannibalistic trilobite-zombie orgy of death.

/not that the article actually has the age anywhere

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 11:30:51 AM

Also from my neck of the woods, this one has 3 different species:

sites.google.com

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 11:33:29 AM

I've got a slab with 88 trilos out at a lab being prepared. Darn, no pics yet!

In the meanwhile, check out the multi-faceted eyes on this rolled up trilo:
sites.google.com

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 11:36:36 AM

Instead of monopolizing this thread with pics of the local trilos,
I'll instead post a link to the ne-plus-ultra of trilobite web sites (new window)

MBooda		2011-03-17 11:38:05 AM

Lot of good it did them.

/gonna party like it's the Permian-Triassic Event

BrokenToilet		2011-03-17 11:46:26 AM

AlanSmithee: I've got a slab with 88 trilos out at a lab being prepared. Darn, no pics yet!

Are you some kind of trilobite pornographer? You disgust me.

BurnShrike		2011-03-17 11:48:29 AM

BrokenToilet: AlanSmithee: I've got a slab with 88 trilos out at a lab being prepared. Darn, no pics yet!

Are you some kind of trilobite pornographer? You disgust me.

I'm pretty sure a few hundred million years old is over the legal age of consent.

Erix		2011-03-17 11:57:48 AM

BurnShrike: BrokenToilet: AlanSmithee: I've got a slab with 88 trilos out at a lab being prepared. Darn, no pics yet!

Are you some kind of trilobite pornographer? You disgust me.

I'm pretty sure a few hundred million years old is over the legal age of consent.

I don't think fossils are legally able to give their consent.

Therion		2011-03-17 01:19:14 PM

AlanSmithee: Instead of monopolizing this thread with pics of the local trilos,
I'll instead post a link to the ne-plus-ultra of trilobite web sites (new window)

Cool link, Alan. Keep posting pics, they're quite interesting.

And say hello to your new favorites tag:

img232.imageshack.us

loki see loki do		2011-03-17 01:21:32 PM

Hey, Professor Bret!

Cool pics AlanSmithee

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 01:55:04 PM

Nice to see some trilo-love here!
BTW, the pics I posted are of trilos found by friends --I don't have a site yet. But I've got similar (and sometimes better!) material.
Here's a pic from Sam Gon's site of a really spiny specimen:
www.trilobites.info

I've found similar dudes around here, but squished in shale and rather 'road-killed'. Once of these days, I'll find one as well-preserved as the above, and then brag about it incessantly for years on end it till someone shoots me in the face.

BurnShrike		2011-03-17 02:03:05 PM

AlanSmithee: Nice to see some trilo-love here!
BTW, the pics I posted are of trilos found by friends --I don't have a site yet. But I've got similar (and sometimes better!) material.
Here's a pic from Sam Gon's site of a really spiny specimen:

Wow, what an amazing fossil.

I've been going to some shale beds near here that have trilobite fossils but I have yet to find anything worthwhile. If I find a trilobite at all (I find mostly coral, brachiopods and crinoids) it's just a segment or two.

theorellior		2011-03-17 02:27:23 PM

AlanSmithee: then brag about it incessantly for years on end it till someone shoots me in the face.

Now that's a headstone:

ALAN SMITHEE
19XX-20XX
Was an asshat
about his trilobite

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 02:33:32 PM

BurnShrike: I've been going to some shale beds near here that have trilobite fossils but I have yet to find anything worthwhile. If I find a trilobite at all (I find mostly coral, brachiopods and crinoids) it's just a segment or two

Whereabouts are you? Possibly I could give you a few tips.

BurnShrike		2011-03-17 02:48:49 PM

AlanSmithee:
Whereabouts are you? Possibly I could give you a few tips.

I'm in southern Ontario. There are quite a few locations in the area that are good for fossil hunting, but most are private. The few that are open to the public don't like you digging, so it kinda sucks.

AlanSmithee		2011-03-17 03:32:59 PM

BurnShrike: I'm in southern Ontario

Hmm. If you're in Devonian rocks, trilos are a minor part of the fauna there. Email me (link in profile), and I'll give you a contact

MBA Whore		2011-03-17 06:53:14 PM

AlanSmithee [TotalFark] Quote 2011-03-17 11:33:29 AM
"I've got a slab with 88 trilos out at a lab being prepared. Darn, no pics yet!

In the meanwhile, check out the multi-faceted eyes on this rolled up trilo:"

At the risk of sounding ignorant, can you show / explain why a multi-faceted eye is a BFD, and where is it in the pic? Type slowly and use small words, as if I were an MBA grad.

/ would like to have a pet trilo