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(MSNBC)   If you are fluent in another language, the CIA wants you. Wait one second, cheeto fingers: Klingon, Huttese, and Na'vi don't count   (msnbc.msn.com) divider line 142
    More: Cool, CIA, United States Foreign Service, u.s. education, Spanish-speaking, CIA wants, University of Maryland  
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8643 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Mar 2011 at 7:58 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



142 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2011-03-09 06:19:50 PM
You forgot Elvish.
 
2011-03-09 07:37:43 PM
i15.photobucket.com
 
2011-03-09 08:01:05 PM
How about 1337-speak?

/feels dirty just typing that
 
2011-03-09 08:03:12 PM
Sohng peech alay....ee mara !tram ti tachk maki chisa.
 
2011-03-09 08:03:31 PM
Cheeto fingers?
 
2011-03-09 08:04:19 PM
I only know the language of looove. *pops champagne*
 
2011-03-09 08:05:39 PM
*sniff*..*snifffff*.

That's not cheetos. That's poop. I was scratchin me bum.
 
2011-03-09 08:07:54 PM
img34.imageshack.us
 
2011-03-09 08:08:04 PM
Throughout middle school, high school, and (now) my final year of college, I either studied or was forced to study the following languages to fluency, or at least contextual understanding: French, German, Hebrew, Latin, Yiddish.

I still cannot communicate with half the people in my city. Spanish should be compulsory in schools.

I can, however, read lots of old books with no relevance to modern society.
 
2011-03-09 08:09:04 PM
Subby, ma bookie! Keel-ee calleya ku kah.
 
2011-03-09 08:09:13 PM
My Na'vi comes across as too formal anyways.
 
2011-03-09 08:09:30 PM
It wouldn't matter how many languages I spoke -- the CIA don't want me, I assure you.

/No Cheetoh fingers -- Funyuns FTW!
 
2011-03-09 08:12:30 PM
I speak a little jive.
 
2011-03-09 08:13:59 PM

Darkraven: I can, however, read lots of old books with no relevance to modern society.


Old books are the most impressive looking, anyway. Most people don't know the margins were wide, the fonts were larger, and the paper stock was thick.

/shhhhh.... don't tell anyone
 
2011-03-09 08:14:00 PM

Darkraven: I still cannot communicate with half the people in my city. Spanish should be compulsory in schools.


just pick up ladino and i'm sure you'll manage...
 
2011-03-09 08:14:01 PM
content.altfonts.com
 
2011-03-09 08:18:37 PM
I'm told there's a test you can take if you want to join the military and learn a language. It basically tests if you're capable of learning a new language quickly.

Does anyone know of what it is, or if I could take it to test myself? I've always been curious to know my own capabilities.
 
2011-03-09 08:19:20 PM
How about Kryptonian?
 
2011-03-09 08:21:37 PM
The CIA has wanted me for years, but I always stay one step ahead of th#FQ#%*OK7iol;47k mj5

###NO CARRIER###
 
2011-03-09 08:23:57 PM
I worked with a Scottish immigrant for a few years. I think that qualifies as learning another language.
 
2011-03-09 08:25:24 PM
Na'vi counts as a true geek language now? I thought that world ranked with twilight in terms of it's geek cred.
 
2011-03-09 08:26:37 PM
next on list, terrorists are teaching everyone Klingon.
 
2011-03-09 08:27:28 PM
I worked in Scotland for 5 years. I could figure out what the Glaswiegians were saying by general context and guesswork.
 
2011-03-09 08:27:34 PM
skyotter you speek wingding?
I speek hillbilly.
 
2011-03-09 08:27:57 PM
What is the Klingon word for loneliness?
 
2011-03-09 08:29:36 PM
Karawane

jolifanto bambla o falli bambla
großiga m'pfa habla horem
egiga goramen
higo bloiko russula huju
hollaka hollala
anlogo bung
blago bung blago bung
bosso fataka
ü üü ü
schampa wulla wussa olobo
hej tatta gorem
eschige zunbada
wulubu ssubudu uluwu ssubudu
tumba ba-umf
kusa gauma
ba - umf
 
2011-03-09 08:31:54 PM

moops: What is the Klingon word for loneliness?


Some say it is 'G'arr D'aK!"
 
2011-03-09 08:32:51 PM
你的狗要牛排
 
2011-03-09 08:33:00 PM
The CIA only hires college grads....from real schools, not online diploma mills....with 3.4 minimum GPA, and not over 35 years of age. I know, because I know someone who went through the process. That's all I'm saying about it. No, fark-heads, I'm not talking about myself.
 
2011-03-09 08:33:15 PM
Smme say it is "jImobqu'"
 
2011-03-09 08:34:05 PM
I speak Canadian French fluently, and can converse well enough to be understood in German (I read it much better).


I didn't RTFA, but I somehow doubt these particular languages are top priorities for the CIA at the moment.

/Canadian
 
2011-03-09 08:34:41 PM
The only artificed language which contains enough words to have fluency was made by Tolkien.
 
2011-03-09 08:38:16 PM
Anyone else speak Esperanto?
 
2011-03-09 08:39:37 PM
Ahh, gotta love those Christians In Action.
 
2011-03-09 08:41:17 PM
www.smbc-comics.com
 
2011-03-09 08:45:54 PM
Russian is the second most spoken foreign language in my state, after Spanish, and the colleges have some good classes for it. It seems like an intimidating language though.
 
2011-03-09 08:47:29 PM
@ Ambitwistor

/As someone majoring in Japanese and Asian Studies just so I can spend days online watching anime porno online, I am really getting a kick out of your reply.
 
2011-03-09 08:48:06 PM

Fissile: The CIA only hires college grads....from real schools, not online diploma mills....with 3.4 minimum GPA, and not over 35 years of age. I know, because I know someone who went through the process. That's all I'm saying about it. No, fark-heads, I'm not talking about myself.




Did I miss a part of the article where this was talked about?
 
2011-03-09 08:50:14 PM
How about C++?
 
2011-03-09 08:52:52 PM

They_no_kill_BakBak: I'm told there's a test you can take if you want to join the military and learn a language. It basically tests if you're capable of learning a new language quickly.

Does anyone know of what it is, or if I could take it to test myself? I've always been curious to know my own capabilities.


It's called the DLAB (pronounced dee-lab) I think it stands for Defense Languange Aptitude Battery. It's a seperate test you take after the ASVAB. I don't know where you can find it for yourself though.
 
2011-03-09 08:54:03 PM
well if the CIA wants me she needs to be a little more open about it, I'm just not the kind to get all those subtle hints.
 
2011-03-09 09:07:01 PM

shermernasty: They_no_kill_BakBak: I'm told there's a test you can take if you want to join the military and learn a language. It basically tests if you're capable of learning a new language quickly.

Does anyone know of what it is, or if I could take it to test myself? I've always been curious to know my own capabilities.

It's called the DLAB (pronounced dee-lab) I think it stands for Defense Languange Aptitude Battery. It's a seperate test you take after the ASVAB. I don't know where you can find it for yourself though.


"HI I'd like to join the military. Could I take my DLAB? I got what score? Nevermind, I don't think the military is for me...."
 
2011-03-09 09:09:23 PM
Some languages aren't all that difficult. From what I've read, Chinese is easy:

www.arcadeglory.com
 
2011-03-09 09:10:11 PM
images-mediawiki-sites.thefullwiki.org

You, made up a little language based off a TV show. That's not right!
 
2011-03-09 09:13:53 PM

HellRaisingHoosier: Fissile: The CIA only hires college grads....from real schools, not online diploma mills....with 3.4 minimum GPA, and not over 35 years of age. I know, because I know someone who went through the process. That's all I'm saying about it. No, fark-heads, I'm not talking about myself.



Did I miss a part of the article where this was talked about?


The headline implies that if you're fluent in another language, the CIA will consider hiring you. Not. The process of getting hired by the CIA is long and arduous. Being fluent in a language that is needed by the CIA, is only the first step. Language skills they are looking for include, Mideastern, Asian and East European. They don't really give a shiat about your Spanish minor.
 
2011-03-09 09:14:27 PM
I'm not going to put accents because I spilled orange juice all over my number pad, shorting it out, so sorry in advance.

Estoy de acuerdo con este articulo. Cuando estaba en las clases de espanols (Tres anos), aprende al mismo cosa ano a ano. Pero, aprende mucho en mis tercer ano, porque la maestra (una soltarona de Espana) nos quisio aprender espanol, y la ella nos enseno buen.

El problema no es "Las escuelas no estan graduicando hispanohablantes", La problema es que las maestras no estan ensando bien.
 
2011-03-09 09:16:10 PM

soy chai latte: Anyone else speak Esperanto?


Ne
 
2011-03-09 09:18:24 PM

Foaming: How about C++?


They want someone with at least a B average.

/Tip your waitress...I'll be here all week...
 
2011-03-09 09:19:34 PM

JWF85: Russian is the second most spoken foreign language in my state, after Spanish, and the colleges have some good classes for it. It seems like an intimidating language though.


I took two years of Spanish in junior high, 4 years of German in high school, and two semesters of Russian in college. Russian was the most difficult by far. On the first day of Russian I, we had about 50 people in class. At the end of the semester, that was down to less than 20.
 
2011-03-09 09:19:38 PM
They_no_kill_BakBak:

I was interviewed for some co-op program with the NSA back in the early '80s while studying Russian. I took that test and apparently did pretty well- the CIA called me two days after I graduated from law school about ten years later and asked if I were interested in a job. They cited my language skills from that test in the reason they called.

JWF85:

Russian ...seems like an intimidating language though.

It takes about a week to get used to the Cyrillic alphabet. To me, the hard part of Russian is that it's a very 'algebraic' language, in that the grammar is complex and pretty much every word must be modified as to its usage in a sentence. Actually, I found German's weird split prefixes to be harder to keep in my head, but I didn't study nearly as much German as Russian, so maybe it would have come to me.

I'm currently studying Chinese, and it's a right pain in the butt: tones aside, it has a lot of homophones, and the 'simplified' characters are still complex and mostly arbitrary.
 
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