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(Something Awful)   Photoshop Phriday: Experimental weapons of war   (somethingawful.com ) divider line
    More: Spiffy  
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19598 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jul 2003 at 1:10 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



90 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2003-07-25 09:25:11 AM  
War?

"All my friends know the low rider
The low rider is a little higher..."
 
2003-07-25 10:03:31 AM  
I thinked I laughed at 2.
 
2003-07-25 12:25:23 PM  
the last one was cute.
 
2003-07-25 01:11:27 PM  
God, this just goes on and on, doesn't it?
 
2003-07-25 01:16:05 PM  
Nothing like Nazi's with Nerf[tm] weapons of war!
 
2003-07-25 01:16:58 PM  
Un-amused.
 
2003-07-25 01:17:36 PM  
The Comedy Goldmine Tuesday was MUCH funnier and better done. You should check it out..right now..go..
 
2003-07-25 01:20:44 PM  
OMG THESE SUSKC!!!!11 QUICK, SOMEONE MAKE A PICTURE OF A PLANE WITH DOMO AND AKBAR ON IT, THEN FOLLOW YOUR POST WITH "/cliche" TO LET US ALL KNOW THAT ITS CLICHE!! BETTER YET, SOMEONE MAKE A POORLY DONE PHOTOSHPO THEN FOLLOW IT WITH "/got nothin" TO LET US ALL KNOW THAT, DESPITE YOU HAVGINF NOTHING, YOU STILL SUBMITTED A CRAPTASTIC PHOTOSHOP! THAT SITE TRULY IS SOMETHING AWFUL LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!11ONE
 
2003-07-25 01:20:48 PM  
The Type-R A10 was my favorite.

You'd think that for their own bandwidth benefits, they wouldn't post so damn many of these. It would be better if they eliminated a bunch of these. Even the kick-ass PPs and CGs often have a couple duds.
 
2003-07-25 01:26:18 PM  
WTF. These are teh suck. Something Awful sure is something awful, am i rite guys?
 
2003-07-25 01:27:13 PM  
This was actually pretty funny, at least until the 5th page or so. My favorite was the Battleship one. I usually don't think Photoshop Phridays are funny at all, worse than the worst Fark Photoshops... and DeathOfRats, if you mean the Matrix one, it wasn't even slightly amusing.
 
2003-07-25 01:28:02 PM  
highfructose
If you really have such a hard-on for Ackbar and lame cliches, go look at the last Comedy Goldmine.
 
2003-07-25 01:29:26 PM  
Jeez...Was it reverse voting week over at SA? Where you vote for the worst pshops?

The Goons usually pump out some pretty good stuff, so I don't know what happened.

3Horn
 
2003-07-25 01:31:21 PM  
You know, the Brits actually did drop cinder blocks from their fighter jets onto Iraqi tanks during the war.
 
2003-07-25 01:31:35 PM  
This had so much potential.

And not enough imagination
 
2003-07-25 01:32:03 PM  
SA photoshop has been going downhill the last month or two.
 
2003-07-25 01:34:24 PM  
So funny!

Genius!

Everyone else is wrong!

Only my opinion matters.

Ha ha ha...
 
2003-07-25 01:34:59 PM  
Angry Villian... I want to say that the US did a similiar thing with cinder blocks on buildings. Something about minimzing collateral damage.
 
2003-07-25 01:35:45 PM  
Photoshop Phridays started sucking when the Page of Shame stopped happening. Bring back the Page of Shame, and maybe they'll be funny again.
 
2003-07-25 01:36:22 PM  
I had a good chuckle over this one. It looked a hell of a lot better than the unlikely website 'shop we had today. Then again, my photoshop skillz would make images look like someone using MS Paint while having a seizure, so I really don't have much room to talk.
 
2003-07-25 01:36:32 PM  
I thought it was one of the better weeks. The quality wasnt the best, admittedly, but the concepts were good.
 
2003-07-25 01:37:23 PM  
I think 'highfructose' was being sarcastic.

By the way hf, nice touch with the "ONE" to tail off the exclamation points.
 
2003-07-25 01:38:32 PM  
None of those weapons could even touch the destructive power of the X-15 Cruise Basselope.
 
2003-07-25 01:40:13 PM  
2003-07-25 01:38:32 PM mungtor:

God, I miss Bloom County. I still remember the day that Berke retired...I mourn that like someone died.
 
2003-07-25 01:40:57 PM  
The Chewbacca comics are much funnier. Wookie!
 
2003-07-25 01:42:07 PM  
[image from home.ptd.net too old to be available]

you knew someone was gonna post it...
 
2003-07-25 01:43:10 PM  
and i miss bloom county too. like the greats of calvin and hobbes and Far side, our lives are that much emptier....i need some boobies and liquor to beat this depression.
 
2003-07-25 01:43:18 PM  
orson
Gee, do you suppose I was, too?
 
2003-07-25 01:44:42 PM  
calvin and hobber!!!! sigh... those were the days... and the far side...

only new cartoon that's come close that i read is get fuzzy...
 
2003-07-25 01:45:27 PM  
and of course, by hobber i mean hobbes, and i am slightly retarded
 
2003-07-25 01:46:51 PM  
Not even going to bother. SA has sucked so hard for the last two years Fark should be ashamed at linking to them. In fact, if I was SA, I would have the refer link come to a special 'from fark' page to tell everyone that they suck and should never visit SA ever again.
 
2003-07-25 01:51:04 PM  
If you're running proxomitron while trying to see the ps's here, you get a tranny on everyone. Oddness
 
2003-07-25 01:51:14 PM  
The Matrix one is really funny. Quality stuff.
 
2003-07-25 02:04:52 PM  
If you're running proxomitron while trying to see the ps's here, you get a transformer on everyone. Oddness

I've never been one for transexuals myself.
 
2003-07-25 02:06:29 PM  
Nice work YodaBlues! Bloom County was the best.
 
2003-07-25 02:07:08 PM  
Apparently there are a few Farkers who are still bear a spiky grudge about having their little, pink bottoms spanked severely in the Big Drew Curtis' FARK vs. SA Photoshop Contest...

Release the anger, young grasshoppers, and you too may one day become the Master.

Admit it! Lowtax does a fine job of running SA... which is especially impressive given his freakish appearance and foul personality. Let's see any one of us build a unstoppable empire of online sarcasm while AT THE SAME TIME living in a greasy cave and gnawing on human remains. Except for him, I say it can't be done...
 
2003-07-25 02:11:01 PM  
Where are the cliches? Where's the Mustard Man Gas? Where's the trap? These guys got nothin' on you folks! Best danged photoshoppers this side of the AOL servers down in Virginia [gush gush gush.... sniff, I love you guys!]

Honestly, these other 'one-off' photoshop sites definately lack the on-going developing melodrama that is the continuous photoshop contest thread here at Fark!

Now where's my dollar!
 
2003-07-25 02:13:42 PM  
Dont thank me, thank....

[image from home.ptd.net too old to be available]

"MY WORK HERE IS DONE. NOW, I AM OFF. FOR WHERE THERE IS A PHOTOSHOPPER IN NEED OF A SOURCE PIC, I'M THERE. OR A SADO LOOKING FOR PICS OF THAT GUY WHO HAD HIS HEAD CLIPPED BY THE HELICOPTER...I'LL BE THERE. AND WHEN A 15-YEAR OLD DESPERATELY NEEDS SOME BOOBIE PICS OF J.LO....I'LL BE THERE. FAREWELL FARKERS!!!"


*note: GIS was killed on his way back to his home planet.
 
2003-07-25 02:16:59 PM  
Is it just me, or was the photoshop from "Unkempt" taken straight from Saving Private Ryan with little to no changes done?
 
2003-07-25 02:20:05 PM  
look at the legs of the driver. half-track's arent normally pedal-driven.
 
2003-07-25 02:20:45 PM  
The tank tread mounted well was great. Jesus christ that movie scared the piss out of me, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.
 
2003-07-25 02:28:18 PM  
My favorite is the deer-guided antitank system, only because the name and designation for it actually sounds like a piece of real military hardware.

Some of these photoshops already exist, or will soon. The jet with animal wings, for instance, is, believe it or not, currently under development. The DoD is researching how it is that insects fly. If you ever look closely at how an insect stays aloft, it quickly becomes obvious that they are more agile, and how more control over their movements, than any current aircraft. Future Unmanned Aerial Vehicles might incorporate wings that operate like a dragonfly's.

The twin-fuselage F-15 isn't a new idea. The Germans designed several fighters in WWII that had two fuselages. Granted, they didn't have twin cockpits, and they were only produced as prototypes, but the idea has been around for 50 years. The famed Lockheed P-38 Lightning was a twin-boom aircraft as well.

The trebuchet with the baby payload was actually used in the medieval period. During one of the periodic sieges of, I believe, Constantinople or Tyre, the attackers launched plague-ridden corpses, including children, over the walls in an effort to kill the defenders without harming the actual city. It could be considered a very early form of biological warfare, or even a prototype neutron bomb, in terms of it's desired effect.

The satellite dropping a large weight is actually on the drawing board as well. The DoD is still floating around a proposal to buy the prototype X-34 Space Plane from NASA, and convert it to a high-altitude, hypersonic bomber. The plane can reach any point on Earth in 90 minutes, fly at Mach 6+, and would have a maximum operational altitude well above any modern air-defense system. Its payload would be bomb-shaped pieces of metal with no explosive. The kinetic energy a 1 ton munition would build up from being dropped from space is enormous. A Volkswagen dropped from low orbit would hit with the power of a small nuclear weapon.

The horse-drawn artillery piece is nothing new, either. Most German artillery in WWII, as well as Soviet, was horse-drawn. Virtually all arty in WWI got around by horse, some by rail.

The soldiers with the guitar and speakers is pretty familiar. During Operation Just Cause (the invasion of Panama), Manuel Noriega fled into a church and took refuge there. US forces got him to come out by blasting heavy metal at the church 24/7. Psychological warfare is wonderful stuff.

The armored Volkwagen bug has been seen before as well. Guess which army and in what war.
 
2003-07-25 02:30:27 PM  
But there really WAS a halftrack motorcycle. Was that pic even a photoshop, because it looks just like it...
 
2003-07-25 02:30:32 PM  
davidv - Yeah, that movie scared the everliving fark out of me. I actually had nigtmares for several days after watching it. I refuse to see it again.
 
2003-07-25 02:35:48 PM  
if a movie "scares" you, then quit being a pussy
 
2003-07-25 02:36:50 PM  
Now that I think about it, the deer with a bomb strapped to it isn't new, either. The US had a program in WWII that involved strapping dynamite to bats. The idea was that the bats would be released from a bomber over a Japanese city during the daylight hours. Since bats hate light, they'd fly down to the city and seek shelter there. The most advanced forms of home construction in Japan at the time was still bamboo walls and rice-paper windows. So when the bats finally went off, they'd burn a good portion of the city down.

Allegedly, the program had one test. Bats were released over a mock village built somewhere in a remote location in the US. The bats, instead of taking shelter in the dummy village, flew back to their home base, and in the process destroyed a US ammo dump. The program was scrapped.

The Russians tried sticking limpet mines to dogs and having them run under German tanks, where there was little armor. The results were about the same as the US bat experiment. Man's best friend makes a really, really poor suicide bomber.
 
2003-07-25 02:37:45 PM  
Awww...loookie here. AlgertMan wants to have a dick-waving contest. Isn't that cute?
 
2003-07-25 02:42:28 PM  
DeathOfRats, I was thinking the exact same thing while reading this this morning.
 
2003-07-25 02:44:05 PM  
NOT funny.

/didn't read the article, but it is SA after all... feh
 
2003-07-25 02:52:33 PM  
2003-07-25 02:35:48 PM AlgertMan:
if a movie "scares" you, then quit being a pussy

I was stationed in Korea when Saving Private Ryan came out. I watched the first showing on post. Around half the theater was WWII and Korean War veterans. It was so realistic, some of them had to leave the theater to stop themselves from panicking. There was hardly a dry eye in the house. After what they had seen in real life, I don't think you have much grounds for calling them pussies.
 
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