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(Cracked)   Six things that annoy you every day (explained by science)   (cracked.com) divider line 197
    More: Interesting, train cars, scientific laws, EMP, road rage, personal distance, withholding, asphyxiation, tire irons  
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37938 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Feb 2011 at 5:02 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-02-21 11:49:41 AM  
Not people who know it all and actually don't know a thing?
 
2011-02-21 11:51:35 AM  

LittleBlondeJug: Gwyrddu: correction: People who stick with "I could care less" are saying it wrong.

Absolutely.

That's a pet peeve of mine.

I hate that.

/couldn't care less


Haha! NICE.
 
2011-02-21 11:51:51 AM  
corasoul.files.wordpress.com
 
2011-02-21 11:59:25 AM  

wambu: TFA If we urbanites really didn't care about the people around us, we'd do stuff like point and stare if someone was wearing a funny hat.

How does that explain People of Walmart (new window)? Are there different rules for the 'burbs?


You've seen the website, wouldn't you be afraid of one of those people charging you like an enraged bull elephant. Not that you couldn't out run them assuming you weren't one of them, but the chance that they could trip and land on some unsuspecting bystander
 
2011-02-21 12:02:02 PM  

Cyrusv10: People who forget to turn off their high beams during the daytime (or simply don't care).

/pisses me off.


No, people at night who don't turn them down when traffic comes the other way or when they come up behind someone. That's the worst.
 
2011-02-21 12:10:43 PM  

pute kisses like a man: jaylectricity: So is there anything you can do about these things? Yes, actually. A single driver can "break" these jams by leaving a significant amount of open space in front of him in heavy traffic, resisting the temptation to accelerate and close the gap even when cars cut in ahead. This technique not only stops the driver from having to brake when he reaches the back end of a wave, it actually destroys the wave for anyone behind him.

This is basically how I drive. And yes, sometimes the car behind me finds an opportunity to pass me (either on the left or right) and get in front of me and continue to stop and go like they were before...but this time they're like 50 yards closer to their destination.

I'm no scientist, but I have the following complaint or concern regarding this practice:

although you may be helping the greater good, aren't you slowing your own progress as the cost?

I am raising this concern in opposition to myself as well, because I drive like this. My wife thinks I'm some grandma on the highway. I also understand that the slowest drivers are the ones who create the most dangerous of situations. But, in traffic jams, I don't think cruising speed is a factor compared to the distance between cars, and the rate of breaking and accelerating.

So, I always try to travel the speed of traffic (even if it means I have to go over the limit, which aggravates me), but I make sure not to follow anyone too closely. Unfortunately, the rest of the world sees this as a weakness and habitually cuts me off.

plus, i drive a standard, and it's annoying to be rushing to stop all the time, easier just to coast along in neutral, aware of an appropriate spatio-temporal balance with my fellow automobilers

i hate standards, but I think everyone should drive one (or at least, learn to drive one), makes you pay more attention, and makes texting and cell phoning more impractical...


Well first off, I don't mind if I get somewhere ten minutes later than I would have had I driven more aggressively. I have organized my life in such a way that it really doesn't matter when I get anywhere. I can leave earlier if I need to be somewhere on time and the time I spend in my car is nice. I turn on sports radio, roll down the window, eat and spit sunflower seeds and just enjoy myself.

Also, I drive this way because it is easier on my car, and is more efficient on the gasoline.
 
2011-02-21 12:13:34 PM  
I could care less about whether people say "I could care less" or "I couldn't care less", but not by much
 
2011-02-21 12:33:51 PM  
18 bis. Lists from sites I can't view at work, especially when nobody posts the whole list.
 
2011-02-21 12:46:30 PM  

bump: The coworker in the cube next to you that coughs and clears her throat every 50 seconds.

Heh,... you MUST work near me. The guy behind my cube clears his throat every 20-30 seconds (no exageration) and blames it on sinus issues.


I know this guy. He also carries a snot rag in his pocket, takes it out and blows his nose in it every five minutes, before sticking it back in his pocket. He re-uses his snot rags until they basically disintegrate, and is partial to the large red and blue cloth snot rags with the white paisley design.
 
2011-02-21 12:48:21 PM  

Gwyrddu: Nobody has shown yet where the phrase has come from, and the fact that all can do is throw around insults means you don't know either.


Such willful ignorance must be exhausting. Read this and STFU.
 
2011-02-21 12:53:51 PM  

Masso: People that stand on the left side of subway's escalators.

Idiots that spend 10 minutes deciding on what to order at the counter of McDonald's while shiat tons of people are queuing. You have all the time in the world to think while waiting, now, at the counter, you decide to ask your kids, your sisters, and your parents one what do they want?


You think that's bad? I used to work at a pizza place. There is nothing more annoying than a customer calling the pizza place and then asking the employee to hold on while they decide what they want to order.

Now that I think about it there is nothing more annoying than customers.

/There should be a day when every person in the service industry gets to say some "No soup for you!" equivalent. The world would be a better place.
 
2011-02-21 12:54:35 PM  
If you like lists of annoying things, one of the best lists in the history of literature is The Miseries of Human Life by James Beresford (1806), expanded in later editions to two volumes.

It was a hit and made GBP 5,000--in 1806 pounds, which were worth about ten times as many dollars as they are today, with the dollar being many times more valuable.

It can be downloaded from Open Library.

There's also an "American" edition, which is to say a rip-off from the days when America was violating European and British copyrights worse than China does today. It is very annoying, with a lot of dialogue and American material added to the drolleries of the original British author.

It is to be found on Google Books under the title Miseries of Human Life, An Old Friend in New Dress.

A short excerpt of the original British book can be purchased with a ball and chain for a bookmark. 'Cute, but it does stack as well as a flatter book. It removes all of the dialogue of the original and leaves the list of miseries, which is more palatable to the modern reader by far.

Books of moaning about annoying things go way back, at least in the societies that were sufficiently rich and leisured to have the time to moan.

Sei Shonagon's Pillow Book contains a list of annoyances and was written around 1000 A.D. give or take, while Europe was too busy trying to crawl out of the Dark Ages to moan much, even if anybody had been literate enough and frivoulous enough to read a book of complaints.

China and Japan produced some wonderfully witty and humourous books which nobody can read nowadays because even scholars don't know all the characters. Works like the Pillow Book often seem incredibly modern for something written during our Middle Ages.

Lists are a high art form under the pen or brushes of the aristocratic sophisticates of China, Japan, the United Kingdom, etc. They're extremely tedious in the hands of ninnies.
 
2011-02-21 12:56:46 PM  
FTFA:
A single driver can "break" these jams by leaving a significant amount of open space in front of him in heavy traffic, resisting the temptation to accelerate and close the gap even when cars cut in ahead.



I do this all the time. This isn't common knowledge?

/curious
 
2011-02-21 12:57:54 PM  

Monkey MKIII: n+1) What they've done to Sesame Street


The inventor of Elmo needs to be shot with extreme prejudice.

/hate that little red bastard but my son loves him
 
2011-02-21 12:59:41 PM  
9) Revolution Number 9
 
2011-02-21 01:08:02 PM  

Road Rash: Carnies


The Dutch.
 
2011-02-21 01:17:14 PM  

tonguedepressor: I know somebody is expecting to see this so here you go...


Thank you.
 
2011-02-21 01:20:16 PM  

1. Put snakes on plane: Gwyrddu: Nobody has shown yet where the phrase has come from, and the fact that all can do is throw around insults means you don't know either.

Such willful ignorance must be exhausting. Read this and STFU.


Meh, I guess I was wrong about the phrase not having a provable source. But your link does prove that "I could care less" is a valid phrase in the US, one different than "I couldn't care less", and both go back at least fifty years, so I don't know where this hostility is coming from.

I suppose next people will biatch about inflammable vs. flammable, or aluminum vs. aluminium.
 
2011-02-21 01:22:52 PM  
So, basically increasing population drives everyone nuts -- a theory I've been backing for a few decades.

I've yet to understand the logic which makes people pour into a small, pretty town for the beauty and relaxation of it, then promptly build on every square inch of available land, invite everyone they know to move there, triple the property values and plow down the forests and fields they came there to enjoy in the first place. Then, they gripe that the town has changed.

As for people getting involved in actions on the streets, like some poor soul getting the shiat kicked out of him by 4 other guys or the old lady on the highway pulled over with a flat tire desperately trying to get help, well there are several things involved.

If you jump into a fight, you risk getting beaten to a pulp. It it's gang related, then you probably will become a later revenge target not to mention that even if not, you face the possibility of a lawsuit from one of the combatants.

If you work, anything that delays you from doing your job can be perceived by your company as non-productive and costing them money. Plus, if you have a logo on your clothing or vehicle, there's a chance the person you tried to help may sue the company because you didn't help EXACTLY right. So, if you stop to help, you can get biatched at by the boss, written up or possibly loose your job. That guy, decades ago, who sued a doctor who stopped to save his life on the roadside after a crash -- for not doing a better job of it -- opened up a whole, new avenue of litigation which resulted in folks NOT stopping for fear of lawsuits and eventually States had to implement a 'Good Samaritan Law'.

As highways became more and more crowded, stinky and noisy and people not only had to meet time tables more, but had to dramatically increase watching out for the other driver, tempers started flaring. Mainly from frustration of being caught in a mess over which they had no control.

When I was a courier for Airborne Express, the seasonal increase of traffic and road work was NOT an acceptable excuse for not making good time on my delivery route. Getting into an accident was barely acceptable so long as it was not my fault.

As traffic has increased, people are under more and more pressure to produce along a time table and crowded highways can simply drive one nuts with frustration.

Then there's the simple, basic fact: jam in 4 times the people that a place was built for and everyone gets on everyone else's nerves because they're forced to live so close together.

Kind of like living in a nice house in a nice neighborhood when your neighbors decide to play loud, annoying rap music all day long basically because they can and don't care if it annoys you or the carport mechanic across the street just HAS to rev up the engine he's working on before attaching the mufflers. Those DIY-ers can drive you to distraction with their weekend hammering, drilling, circular saw screaming, lumber banging and trucks pulling in and out.

So, basically, people become their own worst enemies, especially when packed together like sardines in a can.
 
2011-02-21 01:34:48 PM  
HellRaisingHoosier:
I do this all the time. This isn't common knowledge?

/curious



I have honestly never heard of this before today.

Today I have also learned that since I can't prove the origin of every phrase ever I must assume that the stupid versions of them are the original.

What a day!
 
2011-02-21 01:52:35 PM  
What annoys me is unsure people constantly seeking approval and validation from strangers.

Amirite?
 
2011-02-21 02:02:46 PM  

Rik01: I've yet to understand the logic which makes people pour into a small, pretty town for the beauty and relaxation of it, then promptly build on every square inch of available land, invite everyone they know to move there, triple the property values and plow down the forests and fields they came there to enjoy in the first place. Then, they gripe that the town has changed.


Well. I, for one, didn't move here to enjoy forests _or_ fields. I came for the quirky mom-and-pop shops and restaurants, and proximity to my old home town, and overall city character and attitude.

Then again, I don't find other people to be all _that_ aggravating. Bears, mosquitos, lack of air-condition, and five or six _miles_ being roughly equivalent to "down the street" all rank _way_ higher on my list of annoyances. YMMV.
 
2011-02-21 02:06:49 PM  

Gwyrddu: Such willful ignorance must be exhausting. Read this and STFU.

But your link does prove that "I could care less" is a valid phrase in the US


Actually, his link seems to prove that "I could care less" became, in time, a somewhat popular malformation of the phrase "I couldn't care less".

Popular =/= Valid


so I don't know where this hostility is coming from.

I'm going to guess it is coming from your steadfast claims that "no one really knows" and "both are right" - claims that can easily be seen to be false given google and less than thirty seconds.

For a little while, I thought you were trolling.
 
2011-02-21 02:12:34 PM  
Cracked.com strangely missing from list.
 
2011-02-21 02:13:51 PM  

loonatic112358: wambu: TFA If we urbanites really didn't care about the people around us, we'd do stuff like point and stare if someone was wearing a funny hat.

How does that explain People of Walmart (new window)? Are there different rules for the 'burbs?

You've seen the website, wouldn't you be afraid of one of those people charging you like an enraged bull elephant. Not that you couldn't out run them assuming you weren't one of them, but the chance that they could trip and land on some unsuspecting bystander


With some of the, um, women, it's hard to tell if you're looking at their front or back, so it's impossible to determine which way to run. Best strategy is to remain still and hope they don't notice you/demand sex.
 
2011-02-21 02:46:43 PM  

mamoru: 7.) Mosquitos.


Food for bats, purple martins, mosquito hawks.

/Oh, and thinning the human population via malaria and other blood borne disease.
 
2011-02-21 02:51:27 PM  

MayoSlather: The Envoy: My pet hate is people who drive in the overtaking lanes of the motorway. Are you overtaking someone? No? Then get in the farking driving lane you colossal arsehole! WhatCar estimated that people who drive in the central lane of a 3-lane motorway could free up 700 miles of road each year by driving in the correct lane. These people should be fined and get 3 points. It's a potentially huge earner for the police and has the benefit of improving driving conditions for all. It's win/win, except for the muppets who are unable to drive and nobody gives a shiat about them.

Police are not the answer to anything. Well unless you asked the question "Who are the most worthless douche bags on the planet?"...Then police would be the answer.

Also while I agree if you're not passing you should move out of the left lane... generally speaking on an up to speed highway most people are doing well over the speed limit. The left lane is mostly full of people going 10+ over the limit. Then someone gets pissy about the guy only doing 9 over the limit and it leads to a retarded fark post.


See, here's the thing. The left, or inside lane, is for people traveling long distances, not getting on or off the highway. The 2nd lane is for slower people, or those exiting soon. The right lane is for those exiting, or those just entered the highway.
 
2011-02-21 03:35:45 PM  

wambu: With some of the, um, women, it's hard to tell if you're looking at their front or back, so it's impossible to determine which way to run. Best strategy is to remain still and hope they don't notice you/demand sex.


just remember, like the rhinos of the serengeti they have poor eyesight, but an incredibly sensitive sense of smell and hearing. Staying still won't keep these beasts from trampling or worse, all you can do is move quietly avoiding the worst possible fate...In The World
 
2011-02-21 04:00:05 PM  

LittleBlondeJug: Fuggin Bizzy: LittleBlondeJug: The best thing about that article is the Link to the video about traffic waves. (new window)

Often, my hole is the only thing letting people in.

Do people ever force themselves into your hole?


Sadly, yes. This happens surprisingly often. They show no interest at all, then at the last minute when it's almost too late - zip! - they're in my hole. Sometimes, it's three at a time.
 
2011-02-21 04:06:04 PM  
People who curl (or do anything other than squat really) in the squat rack.
 
2011-02-21 04:27:10 PM  

LittleBlondeJug: The best thing about that article is the Link to the video about traffic waves. (new window)


Hah, I work with that guy at UW. Zen warrior of traffic waves probably pretty well with Seattle's typical traffic where the slowdowns are all grouped around low-capacity exits. Seattle frequently has those backed up so that the "line" starts before any overhead lane indicators and that really throws non-commuters for a loop, that and left and right side exits all over the place.

I realize that I do this special car lengths technique to absorb waves naturally, mainly because I drive a manual transmission car.
 
2011-02-21 04:45:29 PM  

austin_millbarge: /7. Ben Affleck


He was the bomb in Phantoms, yo!
 
2011-02-21 04:55:46 PM  

gadian: People who mix up sayings. "I could care less". "Minus well" "For all intensive purposes". "Tow the line". English does not work that way!!!! DIAF!!!!


People who think "I could care less" is somehow wrong, and actually go to the trouble to bang on about it.
 
2011-02-21 05:15:45 PM  

WorLord: Popular =/= Valid


It kinda does, actually.
 
2011-02-21 05:47:25 PM  

Gwyrddu: 1. Put snakes on plane:
Let's add to the list people who purposely spread bullshiat. A fire is too good for you.

Just because I hurt your preconception of reality doesn't mean I'm wrong, I am quite right about the "I could care less" being the correct expression here, since nobody knows for sure where the root of the phrase truly came from. I listed some speculation, and some people also guess that it did come from the negative, but since nobody can prove its true source, you can't say "I could care less" is somehow wrong because of what you want it to mean.

Anyway, I'm insulted by the implication that I would waste my time with an elaborate troll on such a minor issue, regardless of whether I'm right or not, that is what I've read and what I believe to be the truth here.


I respectfully disagree, Gwyrddu.

My method for dealing with this is simple.

Someone: I could care less.
Me: I couldn't.

Then, I feel that the meaning has been corrected and if the Someone is question is fairly astute, they will do better next time.
 
2011-02-21 06:46:16 PM  

Noon Blue Apples: just_another_asshole/jaa: People who walk/run up or down escalators, especially when there is a stairway with noone using it between the up and down escalators, and expect everyone to get out of their way!

Yeah, but the stairs are always blocked by groups of 5 old women walking in a V formation.


no way people who walk in the dreaded v formation would ever take the stairs, they are on the escalator one on the right, next one on the left, next on the right and so on! Just try and get past them, ha!
 
2011-02-21 11:44:51 PM  

jeanwearinfool: This (new window) guy.


*clicks on link*

Huh?

*reads URL* Ohhhh.

[ISeeWhatYouDidHere.jpg]
 
2011-02-22 03:33:39 AM  
Worlord

Well. I, for one, didn't move here to enjoy forests _or_ fields. I came for the quirky mom-and-pop shops and restaurants, and proximity to my old home town, and overall city character and attitude.

Then again, I don't find other people to be all _that_ aggravating. Bears, mosquitos, lack of air-condition, and five or six _miles_ being roughly equivalent to "down the street" all rank _way_ higher on my list of annoyances. YMMV.


Well, I live in what used to be a nice, pretty small town and folks came down here to enjoy the Hawaiian-style beaches, the wide, shallow, brackish river packed with fish, the friendly folks, the low crime and the acres of wild woods. I lived in a rural setting with 1 other house on the block and about 12 others in the entire development and acres of wild woods full of assorted animals.

We had maybe 20,000 people in the county. Now we have over 100,000. Most of the beach is developed beyond recognition, there are now 16 houses on my block and 20 on the block behind me and most of the wild woods and animals are gone.

The river now has to have fishing limits since it's nearly fished out and we have to check the pollution levels before going in it. Crime is up. Traffic is obnoxious. You can't hardly see the stars at night due to light pollution and my quiet neighborhood is now noisy. So many people moved in that we're getting pollution in the river from septic tank seepage and I have to drive nearly out of the county to find a nice, quiet section of woods.

The city leaders are still pushing for more development, even though our local water supply is becoming endangered. (Too many people on the aquifer.) Land prices have exploded and housing prices have followed.

You used to be able to metal detect along the Atlantic Ocean on the beach for Spanish Gold (quite a bit of which has been found in the area) but now, so many folks have done the same thing that you're lucky to find a bottle cap plus you risk being mugged walking along there alone at night.

Our police department has doubled and doubled again in size, we've had to build two new jails and my once quiet, dirt road is paved and now has traffic along it 24/7.

Bugs?

Well, we still have mosquitoes but there's been a drastic reduction in the great, colorful swarms of dragonflies, which fed on the mosquitoes and the great clouds of lightening bugs have dwindled to just a few blinkers now and then. Even the song birds are vanishing but the rat population is increasing.

Awhile back, some kids derailed a freight train passing through, just for the hell of it. At night, they tossed a couple of wash machines on the tracks and the train hit them. No one was injured or killed.

Yeah. Massive development is good for the area.
 
2011-02-22 03:37:59 AM  

HellRaisingHoosier: FTFA:
A single driver can "break" these jams by leaving a significant amount of open space in front of him in heavy traffic, resisting the temptation to accelerate and close the gap even when cars cut in ahead.



I do this all the time. This isn't common knowledge?

/curious


I also do this all the time, sad thing is that other drivers think there is enough space to squeeze in. So it still does not work. Annoys me all the time.
 
2011-02-22 04:19:46 AM  

Frederf: I do #2 pretty often, I mean the "wave break" thing. Big trucks tend to break waves as well because of the nature of their vehicles and their experience (i.e. lack of impulsiveness).


Except that ever since the economy put everyone out of work, the same idiots that you ran into on your commute every day are now driving big rigs, and half of them are on meth because they had no idea how long the hours really were.

Old hand truckers were farking awesome, my grandpa was one all his life after the navy. The new ones will sit in the fast lane going 55 for miles sexting their girlfriends, or alternately come up on you and pass going 85, while weaving halfway between lanes. (See a lot of these guys pulled over, the CHP has a whole trucker division now.) Scary shiat. I couldn't put up with it, after a few weeks of putting up with people like me and the rest of the schmucks on the road, I'd end up like the trucker on Duel.

I'm slowly trying to train my fiance to drive the freeway without braking. Building a better world, one at a time...
 
2011-02-22 05:10:24 AM  

The Envoy: This is not about speed. I drive a 1.6 Focus, I CAN'T speed. It's about having to sit behind some idiot taking up two lanes because I won't under-take and they're too stupid to understand the rules of the road they're sharing with me.


California legalized undertaking a few decades ago specifically for this reason: There are too many people on the road who don't know how to drive properly, too many people for the capacity even if a quarter of them didn't throw a wrench in it. VC § 21754. That doesn't help you, but at least it's recognized somewhere that you shouldn't punish the law abiding who are trying to work within the system around the clueless and disinterested.
 
2011-02-22 11:20:18 AM  

Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy: 42) People who insist on coming into the thread and posting their own addenda to the list in the article.


43) What Cthulhu said.
44) Has "Old People" been mentioned yet?
 
2011-02-22 12:43:11 PM  

Rik01: Yeah. Massive development is good for the area.


Ouch. Man.

For what its worth, I'm sorry. I am, and will likely remain, partial to bright lights and big cities. I can imagine your pain, though, and that sucks. :-(
 
2011-02-22 01:40:34 PM  

DVDave: Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy: 42) People who insist on coming into the thread and posting their own addenda to the list in the article.

43) What Cthulhu said.


We don't know what Cthulhu said...only his homeboy.
 
2011-02-22 02:13:43 PM  
Call me crazy, but I for one found this Cracked list somewhat interesting. For once.

Civil inattention...interesting.
Shockwave traffic jams...makes sense.

But they left off #7: Cracked's inability to put 6 items on a single page!
 
2011-02-22 02:17:35 PM  

malkore: Call me crazy, but I for one found this Cracked list somewhat interesting. For once.

Civil inattention...interesting.
Shockwave traffic jams...makes sense.

But they left off #7: Cracked's inability to put 6 items on a single page!


I used to say the same thing. Then someone said to me (and I quote) "AutoPager is your friend." It is, indeed, now my friend.
 
2011-02-22 11:34:24 PM  
#1 is just more proof that cities and/or any sort of high density living are bad for us. The next time some idiot enviro-hippy whackjob starts spouting off about how suburbs are evil and that we should all be living in high density areas I am going to point them to the related study.
 
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