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(Some Guy)   Ten worst comedians ever   ( divider line 285
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31697 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jul 2003 at 7:42 PM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-07-19 08:55:24 PM  
The list is farked.

My addition to the list (if he isn't on there): I can't remember his name, but his whole schtick was "Or you can call me Jay. Or you can call me Ray..." Only Homer Simpson seemed to like that hack.
2003-07-19 08:55:39 PM  
Kevin Neelan, from old Saturday Night Live--let me summarize his skits, for those of you who don't remember--

"I'm very stupid"
"very very stupid"
"no really, it's funny, cause a person couldn't be as stupid as I am, but i am."
"very stupid."

and so on...
2003-07-19 08:56:06 PM  
I see this is turing into a late night thing...Out of the late night shows, Conan has far and away the best show (haven't seen the Kimmel show, as I live in the UK now). Letterman was only good for his first two years then his jokes were all the same and just became annoying after a while. Leno just sucks. His jokes are lame and unfunny. His bits are the worst, and are written to get down to a level that a slobering lobamotized pychoward inmate would understand.

Even the interviews you can see the difference between them. Conan is incredibly quick witted and makes a bad interview funny (he used to banter a lot with Andy Richter when a invu was tanking). Jon Stewart is just as good with a slightly different humour. Letterman is alright, but still his monologues are bad, however his audiences are the worst. Why do they clap after every joke!?!... Leno just throws stupid softball questions that were written by a teenager.

/meanless--done on little sleep.
2003-07-19 08:56:07 PM  
Glad to see Dirty Work getting something props here.

[Sam & Mitch find out they're half-brothers.]
Mitch: Hey, remember in 4th grade when your sister was up on the monkey bars and I tried to sneak a peak at her underwear? I was really peaking at my own sister's underwear!
Sam: Yeah! And remember in 12th grade when you had sex with her?!
[Long, akward silence]

Mitch: You know what hurts the most is the, is the lack of respect, that's what hurts the most, except for the, except for the anal rape, that hurts the most, but the lack of respect hurts the second most!

Mitch: I've never seen so many dead hookers in my life!
Bystander: Lord knows I have.

Dr. Farthing: I can't blame anyone but myself, except maybe the Boston Bruins, Chicago Cubs, and Mr. T.
Mitch: Wait, Mr. T? You bet on the fight in Rocky III? And you bet against Rocky?
Dr. Farthing: Well, hindsight's twenty-twenty.
2003-07-19 08:58:58 PM  
theres two kinds of people in this world: those who get stomped on and those who do the stomping.
who said that?
you know, that one famous guy.. what was his name? oh yea, JESUS.
2003-07-19 09:00:54 PM

sometimes you gotta show the hen who the rooster is.
2003-07-19 09:02:11 PM  
Conan and Jon Stewart give the best interviews on television. I don't know how they do it, but they make EVERYBODY funny.
2003-07-19 09:03:42 PM  
Google cache of this page for your enjoyment
2003-07-19 09:07:40 PM  
The sad thing is Leno used to be really funny, way before he hosted the tonight show. He used to be much more edgy and cotroversial. See if you can track down some old clips when he was on Letterman, he was hysterical. He used to do this Showtime show which was pretty funny. I have no idea what happened to him. I guess NBC took all the funny away from him, it's kind of sad really. He forgot how to be funny
2003-07-19 09:08:07 PM  
Can we at least agree that George Carlin is god?
2003-07-19 09:09:43 PM  
If it means anything, your Bill Hicks reference was much appreciated.
Everytime some other new bullshiat happens, I wish I could hear his take on it.
[image from too old to be available]
2003-07-19 09:13:34 PM  
Press - Agreed!


anyone think Jim Gaffigan is funny? I don't know, I rather like his comedy right now. ^^
2003-07-19 09:14:07 PM  
Gallagher is all right. Sure, the "Sledge-O-Matic" bit is old, but that's just one part of his act. The rest of his shows are pretty good. Even the whole "Sledge-O-Matic" bit is pretty good the first time you see it; he frames it as a sendup of late-night infomercials. It's actually pretty amusing, the first time.
2003-07-19 09:14:31 PM  
Jim Gaffigan is hilarious everytime hes on conan
2003-07-19 09:18:35 PM  
2003-07-19 09:19:48 PM  
I agree with everyone who has mentioned carrot top. Since everyone seems to agree that carrot top sucks, I have to admit he has one really good thing going for him: his agent. I wish someone would do a behind the music style documentary on him to see whose dick he and his agent are sucking to allow him to continue with his bomb of a career.
2003-07-19 09:22:22 PM  

The list is farked.

My addition to the list (if he isn't on there): I can't remember his name, but his whole schtick was "Or you can call me Jay. Or you can call me Ray..." Only Homer Simpson seemed to like that hack.

Bill "Raymond J. (Johnson)" Saluga on the Redd Foxx Comedy Hour.

Redd Foxx was the farking shiat (as a comedian, and as Fred G. Sanford). Holy shiat. I love that guy.
2003-07-19 09:26:34 PM  
As long as we're blurring the lines between comedians and actors...

Ben Stiller As in, "The Inexplicable Career of."
2003-07-19 09:34:04 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-07-19 09:35:25 PM  
As long as we're blurring the lines between comedians and actors...

Ray Romano?
2003-07-19 09:36:34 PM  
Nice error message. WE KILLED IT!
2003-07-19 09:37:05 PM  
WE KILLED IT! Oh the Humanity.....
2003-07-19 09:37:44 PM  
Great comedians enjoying their prime right now include Lewis Black and Dave Chappelle.

I feel like a lesser person for saying it, but Chappelle's show is just unbelievably hilarious. "I'M RICH, BIATCH!"

Oh, and don't diss Gallagher. Aside from the sledgehammer stuff, his act has always been absolutely hilarious, and he's quite brilliant.
2003-07-19 09:39:57 PM  
Being British, I haven't really caught on to American talk shows until recently. For a couple of weeks I watched Letterman and Leno every night and drew the following conclusions - Leno is occasionally funny, but his arrogance makes me want to poke my balls with a fork; Letterman's just not funny at all. But he had Harry Hill on a few times, so he gets points for that.
2003-07-19 09:41:13 PM  
someone tell me why I always confuse Gallagher with Tiny Tim? lol :)
2003-07-19 09:45:18 PM  
Worst comedians....
Carrot Top (no questions)
Emo Phillips (annoying)
Andrew Dice Clay (juvenile)
Howie Mandell (what? what?)
Mort Sahl (boring)
Johnny Carson (too many still born monologues)
Joey Bishop (too dull)
Martin Lawrence (Richard Pryor wanna-be)
Shucky Ducky (quack quack...fark you!)
Lenny Bruce (the man!)
Sam Kinison (my hero)
Shelley Berman (funniest clean comedian ever!)
Richard Pryor (obvious)
George Carlin
Steven Wright
Rodney Dangerfield
Eddie Murphy (RAW is still a classic!)
2003-07-19 09:45:58 PM  
As long as we're blurring the lines between comedians and actors...

Ray Romano?

Definitely Ray Romano. Let's all yell at each other about how banal normal life is.

And Dave Chappelle. Another Martin Lawrence.
2003-07-19 09:46:47 PM  
no one has mentioned andy dick. am i the only one that doesn't find this guy one bit entertaining? the only way i would laugh at him is if i would see him homeless on the street.
2003-07-19 09:47:50 PM  
OMG, Howie Mandell! How could we have forgotten about HIM?

Actually, maybe that just the point...
2003-07-19 09:55:37 PM  
Andy Dick is a comedian?
2003-07-19 09:57:02 PM  
I don't watch enough of Letterman and Leno to judge the two, but Letterman's bits are awful. Things like "Will it float?" or whatever it was called, et al. Asstastic.
2003-07-19 09:58:47 PM  
zappaisfrank : Sorry, but Bill Hicks is the greatest ever.

1. Bill Hicks
2. Dave Chappelle ( Killing them softly is one of the best hour long comedy specials ever )
3. George Carlin
4. Andy Kaufman
5. Richard Pryor
2003-07-19 10:00:21 PM  
Cousins of mine said his MTV show was funny, so I tuned in once. He was doing a skit about animal ejaculation specialist Bob Gunderson. I cracked a smile only because there is a Bob Gunderson that lives in my neightborhood, and that his name will forever be stained with the catastrophe that is Andy Dick.
2003-07-19 10:01:14 PM  
Carlin's another genius, too...can't believe I forgot to mention him. 'You're All Diseased' is AMAZING.

"Back in my day, when someone came into schools and shot up four or five people, we just kept right on going with our arithmatic! 'Thirty-five students...minus four...'"
2003-07-19 10:03:04 PM  
Sorry, I forgot to put down Andy Kaufmann under the worst comedians on my list...sorry, he was just not funny!
2003-07-19 10:03:47 PM  
I remember Howie Mandel! he had his own show! remember life with bobby?!
2003-07-19 10:03:58 PM  
OMG, Howie Mandell! How could we have forgotten about HIM?

Actually, maybe that just the point...

He died a couple years ago after he tried inflating a surgical glove with his nose like a balloon and passed out, hitting his head the corner of a table.

/bonus points to anyone who gets that
2003-07-19 10:06:44 PM  
Holy shiat! The news just announced that Martin Lawrence got killed in a car crash earlier today.
2003-07-19 10:07:36 PM  
Quoth the website:

DEAR SIRS, I REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT "10 best comedians" is now down to excess hits.


Farked beyond all recognition.
2003-07-19 10:08:56 PM  
Andy Dick and Howie mandell are both horrid. Now that I think about it, so is Tom Green.
2003-07-19 10:08:58 PM  
jeremy hotz is funny
2003-07-19 10:09:28 PM  
Can anyone recommend some good George Carlin material? The one routine I found was quite crap, and I know he is well respected so I thought there must be better stuff out there
2003-07-19 10:10:21 PM  
oops my bad, i didn't mean life with bobby, i meant bobby's world, rock on howie!
2003-07-19 10:17:17 PM  
Wow. This was an overdue list.
2003-07-19 10:18:30 PM  
What's up with all the Carrot Top bashing? C'mon just because he uses visual gags doesn't mean he's not funny. There are plenty worse comedians than him such as Laura Kightlinger.

Oh and have you seen that show Last Comic Standing on NBC? That show is farking hilarious. That crazy ass asian dude has to go! He has nothing funny in him.

And I agree, everybody hates Jay Leno. Talk about the biggest flake in the world. He has mastered the art of fake chuckling and pretending to be a nice guy. And it's the stupid ones who buy into it and think he's genuine.
2003-07-19 10:19:26 PM  
All female comedians suck.
2003-07-19 10:20:21 PM  
Sam Kinison - worst EVER. Ya, yelling will make it funny.
2003-07-19 10:23:31 PM  
Poor poor Howie Mandel. Family Guy tore everyone apart, didn't they?

/Worst. Cancellation. Ever.
2003-07-19 10:24:32 PM  
WayToBlue You forget Sam Kinison was fat, thats funny!
2003-07-19 10:27:10 PM  
Good old Howie sometimes makes appearances on Leno. Obviously, they aren't funny.
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