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(AL.com)   "This fiasco is proof that had Osama Bin Laden been willing to abandon his liberal agenda, become a Republican and move a little further to the right on Nov. 2 , he would have been elected to the office of his choice"   (blog.al.com) divider line 141
    More: Obvious, RICKY THOMASON, Osama bin Laden, republicans, fiasco, Ricky Carmichael, Mad Dog, traffic cones, dead people  
•       •       •

4070 clicks; posted to Politics » on 22 Nov 2010 at 9:59 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



141 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2010-11-22 05:04:28 AM  
Need a Sureal tag?
 
2010-11-22 08:27:03 AM  
If he was Christian instead of Muslim he would win.
 
2010-11-22 08:58:03 AM  
EvilEgg: If he was Christian instead of Muslim he would win.

If he were Christian instead of Muslim, you'd have a hard time telling him apart from any number of 'Constitutionalists'. Except for the brown skin, of course.
 
2010-11-22 09:26:11 AM  
I had no idea that wishing to install a hyper-conservative theocracy was a liberal agenda.
 
2010-11-22 09:32:52 AM  
Aarontology: I had no idea that wishing to install a hyper-conservative theocracy was a liberal agenda.

Well, there you go again, insisting that "words" have "meanings".
 
2010-11-22 09:35:38 AM  
hillbillypharmacist: If he were Christian instead of Muslim, you'd have a hard time telling him apart from any number of 'Constitutionalists'. Except for the brown skin, of course.

There are brown skinned ones, as well.

Skleenar: Well, there you go again, insisting that "words" have "meanings".

Because that's just arguing semantics.
 
2010-11-22 09:37:09 AM  
abb3w: Because that's just arguing semantics.

It's like a Fark thread joke re-run!
 
2010-11-22 09:48:09 AM  
Oh, for those curious, background links hither, thither, and yon. Apparently part of the problem is the Democrat who was in office before the election used his own van for transport and his own funeral home facilities for storing the bodies. ("Socialist." Also apparently in conflict with Alabama Code 11-5-32, due to the potential conflict of interest.) Now the new boy has to figure out how to do the job - AND find new facilities - on a miniscule operating budget.
 
2010-11-22 09:49:19 AM  
Skleenar: Well, there you go again, insisting that "words" have "meanings".

To paraphrase one of the great philosophers of out time, "You're entitled to your language. Not THE language"
 
2010-11-22 09:49:55 AM  
Skleenar: It's like a Fark thread joke re-run!

Reuse, recycle... reduces effort.
 
2010-11-22 10:05:32 AM  
That reads like some backwoods hilljack complaining about an inconsequential political office that was filled with someone who personally annoys him. Oh, wait, that wasn't satire? Jesus,
 
2010-11-22 10:06:19 AM  
wat
 
2010-11-22 10:08:08 AM  
Maybe they can get some stimulus money to pay for a coroner's office...
 
2010-11-22 10:11:13 AM  
clambam: Maybe they can get some stimulus patronage money to pay for a coroner's office...

/FTFY
 
2010-11-22 10:11:41 AM  
abb3w: Oh, for those curious, background links hither, thither, and yon. Apparently part of the problem is the Democrat who was in office before the election used his own van for transport and his own funeral home facilities for storing the bodies. ("Socialist." Also apparently in conflict with Alabama Code 11-5-32, due to the potential conflict of interest.) Now the new boy has to figure out how to do the job - AND find new facilities - on a miniscule operating budget.

Thanks for that. That's hilarious.

Good jorb, people of Madison County, Alabama.
 
2010-11-22 10:12:44 AM  
The Homer Tax: Thanks for that. That's hilarious.

Good jorb, people of Madison County, Alabama.


When in doubt, kick 'em out! Then, in hindsight, try to decide if kicking them out was a good idea. Is there anything the teabaggers can't fark up?
 
2010-11-22 10:13:53 AM  
sprawl15: When in doubt, kick 'em out! Then, in hindsight, try to decide if kicking them out was a good idea. Is there anything the teabaggers can't fark up?

I don't know, but the picture of this tard is gold, too.

There's not one thing about that picture that doesn't scream "smarmy douchebag," I wonder what his FARK handle is and how many political cartoons he posts on here per day.
 
2010-11-22 10:14:25 AM  
abb3w: Oh, for those curious, background links hither, thither, and yon. Apparently part of the problem is the Democrat who was in office before the election used his own van for transport and his own funeral home facilities for storing the bodies. ("Socialist." Also apparently in conflict with Alabama Code 11-5-32, due to the potential conflict of interest.) Now the new boy has to figure out how to do the job - AND find new facilities - on a miniscule operating budget.

I don't understand. Wasn't the old guy doing exactly what they want, by promoting business and not spending taxpayer money? People do not want their taxes raised.
 
2010-11-22 10:15:57 AM  
abb3w: Oh, for those curious, background links hither, thither, and yon. Apparently part of the problem is the Democrat who was in office before the election used his own van for transport and his own funeral home facilities for storing the bodies. ("Socialist." Also apparently in conflict with Alabama Code 11-5-32, due to the potential conflict of interest.) Now the new boy has to figure out how to do the job - AND find new facilities - on a miniscule operating budget.

The former coroner should contract out his van and facility at a rate 3x what his old salary was.

The bootstrappin' tardfolk shouldn't have a problem, it's not socialist at all.
 
2010-11-22 10:18:42 AM  
media.al.com

New Headline: Tea Partier isn't careful about what he wishes for and wins County Coroner job, seeks solace in McRibs for a limited time.

/hot
/like unrefrigerated corpses
 
2010-11-22 10:23:24 AM  
God will still let you into heaven after you've been touched by a Democrat.

Show us where the Democrat touched you.
 
2010-11-22 10:24:40 AM  
It really would have been nice to actually include a fact or two on why the newly elected coroner is not up to the job, but I loved this

All one has to do to be Madison County coroner is to be able to think outside the box.

play on words.
 
2010-11-22 10:26:26 AM  
that article read like a dennis miller rant that had been eaten by a goat and then shiat into a blender.
 
2010-11-22 10:27:02 AM  
HotWingConspiracy:

The former coroner should contract out his van and facility at a rate 3x what his old salary was.


Sounds a little cheap if his is the only facility around. Construction of a new, public morgue would be much more expensive. And stacking the bodies back behind the outhouse until the new morgue can be built will go over well too.
 
2010-11-22 10:27:08 AM  
TFA: "Here's my TV commercial. Picture this: I'm on a farm with my dogs, cats, wife, kids and grandkids, have a bible in one hand and an assault rifle in the other. "Trust me, folks. I am a family man, love apple pie, baseball, America, Alabama, my Mama and Jesus, go to church eight days a week, have integrity out the wazoo, will restore ethics to the coroner's office, waive taxes on the rich, and hate all tax- and-spend liberals."

You know, lots of us like to describe Karl Rove of being some sort of Machiavellian genius, but at the end of the day this is the essence of the Tea/GOP strategy. It really is this simple. With no shortage of morons, Americans lap this piss up and are grateful for the opportunity.
 
2010-11-22 10:31:12 AM  
Why in Sam Hill would the position of coroner be elected?

Are there a bunch of qualified coroners in each county or something?

Egads.
 
2010-11-22 10:32:17 AM  
Stay Cool Babylon: TFA: "Here's my TV commercial. Picture this: I'm on a farm with my dogs, cats, wife, kids and grandkids, have a bible in one hand and an assault rifle in the other. "Trust me, folks. I am a family man, love apple pie, baseball, America, Alabama, my Mama and Jesus, go to church eight days a week, have integrity out the wazoo, will restore ethics to the coroner's office, waive taxes on the rich, and hate all tax- and-spend liberals."

You know, lots of us like to describe Karl Rove of being some sort of Machiavellian genius, but at the end of the day this is the essence of the Tea/GOP strategy. It really is this simple. With no shortage of morons, Americans lap this piss up and are grateful for the opportunity.


This is why we can't have nice things.
 
2010-11-22 10:34:03 AM  
More_Like_A_Stain: Sounds a little cheap if his is the only facility around. Construction of a new, public morgue would be much more expensive. And stacking the bodies back behind the outhouse until the new morgue can be built will go over well too.

Reading from some of the other articles, it sounds like the only ideas this guy has are 1)rotating storage in funeral homes for some reason, and 2) using public services vehicles like ambulances to transport the bodies.

Yeah, that'll probably be cheaper.

It's funny to see the other guy who got ousted he's basically like "I wish him luck, the funeral home I own was cutting the coroner's office that I ran major deals, and I *still* was losing money on the arrangement."
 
2010-11-22 10:36:57 AM  
HotWingConspiracy: abb3w: Oh, for those curious, background links hither, thither, and yon. Apparently part of the problem is the Democrat who was in office before the election used his own van for transport and his own funeral home facilities for storing the bodies. ("Socialist." Also apparently in conflict with Alabama Code 11-5-32, due to the potential conflict of interest.) Now the new boy has to figure out how to do the job - AND find new facilities - on a miniscule operating budget.

The former coroner should contract out his van and facility at a rate 3x what his old salary was.

The bootstrappin' tardfolk shouldn't have a problem, it's not socialist at all.



I only read the the first link you provided but holy fark are people stupid. The county provided no budget for vehicles, insurance, storage facilities or deputies to assist. So he ran the whole thing out of his funeral home and dipped into his own pocket. Did this for 20 years. The republican's complained that he was also able to win funeral business this way. New guy has none of the resources but says he does own a van and plans to ask the county for more money (also said he's going to research what the coroner's office does and come up with a plan). Couple of questions...

1. since when did Republicans decide to start hating capitalism
2. when did Republicans decide they like more taxes/bigger government
3. last I checked, didn't Republicans think everything is done better by private enterprise (and this is about as close as it gets for this office)
 
2010-11-22 10:40:34 AM  
rtaylor92: 3. last I checked, didn't Republicans think everything is done better by private enterprise (and this is about as close as it gets for this office)

no, for at least a decade now, the republican platform has been adaptable to always keep itself in direct opposition of whatever democrats propose. see e.g., cap and trade.
 
2010-11-22 10:40:55 AM  
They need him to run the coroners office with 10k a year, and 8k salary... And they can't even guarantee him a van or the chance to get body storage facilities... and the commission just keeps saying "we're not increasing the budget"... yep, this is going to hell quickly. He obviously didn't look into this properly, or he'd have known that it's simply impossible to run anything on that budget, without having your own facilitates (which the previous guy apparently did). And he's an idiot for not realising all these problems BEFORE he got elected.

I've got a fiver that says he gives up and gives the job back to the previous guy before the years end.
 
2010-11-22 10:42:18 AM  
KWess: Why in Sam Hill would the position of coroner be elected?

I think part of it is that in some places, the coroner is the only person who can arrest the sheriff.
 
2010-11-22 10:44:02 AM  
rtaylor92: The county provided no budget for vehicles, insurance, storage facilities or deputies to assist. So he ran the whole thing out of his funeral home and dipped into his own pocket. Did this for 20 years. The republican's complained that he was also able to win funeral business this way. New guy has none of the resources but says he does own a van and plans to ask the county for more money (also said he's going to research what the coroner's office does and come up with a plan). Couple of questions...

Kind of a metaphor for the entire mid-term election on a national scale, honestly.
 
2010-11-22 10:46:16 AM  
If only the new coroner had "community organizer" on his resume... Then I'm sure the author would feel he was qualified.
 
2010-11-22 10:47:28 AM  
Headline and story make no sense to me.
 
2010-11-22 10:47:32 AM  
Why is that even an elected position?
 
2010-11-22 10:47:46 AM  
The Homer Tax: I wonder what his FARK handle is and how many political cartoons he posts on here per day.

I laughed heartily at that.
 
2010-11-22 10:48:56 AM  
neilio42: If only the new coroner had "community organizer" on his resume... Then I'm sure the author would feel he was qualified.

swing and a miss

no points
 
2010-11-22 10:49:47 AM  
neilio42: If only the new coroner had "community organizer" on his resume... Then I'm sure the author would feel he was qualified.

img.photobucket.com
 
2010-11-22 10:49:52 AM  
rtaylor92: neilio42: If only the new coroner had "community organizer" on his resume... Then I'm sure the author would feel he was qualified.

swing and a miss

no points


Was it that obvious? I thought for sure somebody would bite.
 
2010-11-22 10:50:06 AM  
Geez, Alabama is gonna be a long way to haul all these dead hookers. I'd better get some dry ice.
 
2010-11-22 10:51:21 AM  
neilio42: rtaylor92: neilio42: If only the new coroner had "community organizer" on his resume... Then I'm sure the author would feel he was qualified.

swing and a miss

no points

Was it that obvious? I thought for sure somebody would bite.


An ACORN reference and some misspellings would have helped.
 
2010-11-22 10:53:48 AM  
Aarontology: KWess: Why in Sam Hill would the position of coroner be elected?

I think part of it is that in some places, the coroner is the only person who can arrest the sheriff.


Oh, I don't think that could possibly be true.

/Magna Carta?
 
2010-11-22 10:54:38 AM  
Okay, today I learned that A) Coroner's were elected officials, and B) That they for some farking reason have political party affiliations.
 
2010-11-22 10:55:30 AM  
www.maniacworld.com

Aarontology: KWess: Why in Sam Hill would the position of coroner be elected?

I think part of it is that in some places, the coroner is the only person who can arrest the sheriff.


The sheriff was resisting arrest. I don't know where the deputy was.
 
2010-11-22 10:55:41 AM  
herrDrFarkenstein: neilio42: rtaylor92: neilio42: If only the new coroner had "community organizer" on his resume... Then I'm sure the author would feel he was qualified.

swing and a miss

no points

Was it that obvious? I thought for sure somebody would bite.

An ACORN reference and some misspellings would have helped.


Gotcha. This was my first attempt.

Anyway, I'm willing to bet the author voted Democrat straight down the ballot and then complains that people on the other side did the same thing. Somebody call a whambulence.
 
2010-11-22 11:00:12 AM  
As far as I know, coroners aren't elected where I live. I've never seen them on the ballot, and it doesn't really seem like a position that should be elected. Even weirder is that coroners have political parties? WTF?
 
2010-11-22 11:00:27 AM  
KWess: Oh, I don't think that could possibly be true.

/Magna Carta?


Well, I wasn't entirely correct. English Common Law grants them some law enforcement powers, and there is some holdover from that here in the states. LSome wiki info

herrDrFarkenstein: The sheriff was resisting arrest. I don't know where the deputy was.

Heh.
 
2010-11-22 11:03:56 AM  
Hard to get further right than bin Laden.
 
2010-11-22 11:04:10 AM  
The Homer Tax: 1)rotating storage in funeral homes for some reason,

Why limit that. Grocery stores, butchers and food distribution houses all have large cold storage areas.
 
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