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(Bonnyville Nouvelle)   ProTip: before sneaking on board and hiding in a cargo container, find out where the ship is going   (bonnyvillenouvelle.ca) divider line 40
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19509 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Oct 2010 at 1:41 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



40 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2010-10-09 11:33:35 AM  
What, this isn't the Love Boat? I wanted to see Charo!
 
2010-10-09 12:49:10 PM  
I can't believe that I'm the first to think of this...

A depressed young woman from Manhattan finishing school was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said, "Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy." The girl nodded. What did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" he asked. "I had an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "He's taking me to Europe, and every night he came and screwed me." "He sure did, lady," said the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry".

/Milton Berle, but even he probably stole it & filed the serial numbers off
 
2010-10-09 01:43:40 PM  
People who beg cannot be the people who make the choices. This probably was a very fat person so the only thing this person could sneak into was a cargo container because it was the only thing that had the size to hold this individual. Henceforth and therefore are two words I have recently come to admire and think they both are the appropriate words here and so I will continue with them. Henceforth and therefore this is the reason for why this had happened.
 
2010-10-09 01:47:23 PM  
Oh dear Lord. Just when you thought you couldn't get any more Fail.
 
2010-10-09 01:52:15 PM  
Did the authorities apologize to the stowaways while welcoming them to Canada?
 
2010-10-09 01:53:46 PM  
But not knowing is half the fun. If I'd been more careful, I'd have never learned to speak Nepalese.
 
2010-10-09 01:54:43 PM  
And that children, is how you ended up with Brazilian relatives.

Of course, Jewish people living in 1930s Poland could do a hell of a lot worse than stowing away on the first cargo ship they could find. Half of my relatives made it to the States, the other half ended up in Brazil.
 
2010-10-09 01:56:37 PM  
Why does submitter sneak into containers?
 
2010-10-09 01:57:05 PM  
I'm sure one could do far worse than Canada.
 
2010-10-09 01:57:10 PM  
Recoil Therapy: I can't believe that I'm the first to think of this...

A depressed young woman from Manhattan finishing school was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said, "Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy." The girl nodded. What did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" he asked. "I had an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "He's taking me to Europe, and every night he came and screwed me." "He sure did, lady," said the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry".

/Milton Berle, but even he probably stole it & filed the serial numbers off


Will read again
 
2010-10-09 02:00:43 PM  
You mean this ship isn't going to the Czech Republic?
 
2010-10-09 02:03:06 PM  
I hope they all get welfare for the rest of thier lives in Canada.
 
2010-10-09 02:05:13 PM  
DavidVincent: I hope they all get welfare for the rest of thier lives in Canada.

Or they can just sneak across the border and be set for life in the USA.
 
2010-10-09 02:05:19 PM  
DavidVincent: I hope they all get welfare for the rest of thier lives in Canada.

Why?
 
2010-10-09 02:06:02 PM  
"Where to?" Rincewind sighed. He'd tried to make his basic philosophy clear time and again, and people never got the message. "Don't you worry about to," he said. "In my experience that always takes care of itself. The important word is away." (Terry Pratchett)
 
2010-10-09 02:10:30 PM  
NannyStatePark: I'm sure one could do far worse than Canada.

They'll be send back though, which wasn't their plan.

When did they btw. wonder why it took several days from Morocco to Italy?
 
2010-10-09 02:11:22 PM  
silly canadians....seal the container up and ship them to somalia.
 
2010-10-09 02:13:12 PM  
Ship them back! Duh.
 
2010-10-09 02:15:37 PM  
What's the fun in that?
www.theraider.net

shiat.
www.theraider.net
 
2010-10-09 02:17:00 PM  
"Branson, Missouri.

I can't believe I'm still in Branson, Missouri."
 
2010-10-09 02:17:50 PM  
cats4rent: silly canadians....seal the container up and ship them to somalia.

OH SNAP you must be somebody who remembers how sore Somalia is for Canadians!
 
2010-10-09 02:19:47 PM  
Not such a bad idea if your criteria for a destination is "anywhere but here"
 
2010-10-09 02:34:32 PM  
My great-grandfather stowed away on a cargo ship bound for Canada, but I'm pretty sure he knew the destination beforehand. He ended up jumping the border to the USA because Canada had too many French people.
 
2010-10-09 02:52:33 PM  
Dear God, not Canada!
 
2010-10-09 03:15:20 PM  
I call bullshiat.
That's just their story.
Just some more Jihadists for the Montreal al Qaeda.
They knew where they were going.
Gullible reporters and immigration Canada.
 
2010-10-09 03:16:21 PM  
boy are they ever going to have a funny accent now!
 
2010-10-09 03:26:50 PM  
That is a lot better than the stories of people who stowaway on rail cars. Locked from the outside, and may be months before someone opens the door to an unpleasant surprise.
 
2010-10-09 03:32:32 PM  
Abbu Dhabbi?
 
2010-10-09 03:40:24 PM  
i55.tinypic.com
 
2010-10-09 03:57:43 PM  
i53.tinypic.com

/love that bit when he's been walking for hours, thinking and daydreaming, and he suddenly realises he has no idea where he is
 
2010-10-09 04:23:28 PM  
"Most of the nine people nabbed at the Port of Montreal immediately applied for refugee status"

Sounds like most of the nine people knew exactly where they were headed...
 
2010-10-09 04:55:28 PM  
Jeng: That is a lot better than the stories of people who stowaway on rail cars. Locked from the outside, and may be months before someone opens the door to an unpleasant surprise.

I expect the shipping containers were sealed as well. If the authorities hadn't conducted a search, they might have remained in the containers dockside or on a train for several days.
 
2010-10-09 04:58:36 PM  
bignobody: "Most of the nine people nabbed at the Port of Montreal immediately applied for refugee status"

Sounds like most of the nine people knew exactly where they were headed...


Most of the nine people got a court appointed lawyer who told them they could apply for refugee status.
 
2010-10-09 05:16:22 PM  
Phreyd: Most of the nine people got a court appointed lawyer who told them they could apply for refugee status.

But they don't have to live like refugees.
 
2010-10-09 05:47:31 PM  
yarnothuntin: Phreyd: Most of the nine people got a court appointed lawyer who told them they could apply for refugee status.

But they don't have to live like refugees.


yarnothuntin: Phreyd: Most of the nine people got a court appointed lawyer who told them they could apply for refugee status.

991.com

But they don't have to live like refugees.


/Agrees
 
2010-10-09 05:48:41 PM  
Seven days? These poor fools were lucky their container wasn't headed for China, with a six-week quarantine in Sri Lanka or something.

They'd have needed way more than an asthma inhaler for the bad air...
 
2010-10-09 07:06:41 PM  
Could be worse. The last time I saw someone use that tactic, he ended up in a bad Jean-Claude Van Damme film. (new window)
 
2010-10-09 07:24:51 PM  
DavidVincent: I hope they all get welfare for the rest of thier lives in Canada.

That's what they're all doing in Spain and they've got 4 million unemployed. Let them keep going to Canada and we'll see how they get dealt with.
 
2010-10-09 09:12:47 PM  
So their plan to get to Madagascar with the virus failed?
 
2010-10-10 12:39:17 AM  
There is an easy solution to their plight. Were they shipped postage paid or postage due? If postage paid then Canada is stuck with them. If postage due then Canada can send them back.
 
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