What a shocker.

How's the red carpet at the clubhouse?

Headline too funny for scary tag.

The body was so badly burned that police have been unable to determine either gender or approximate age.


"Ahem"

Now they have someplace to play the next Dinah Shore tournament. And they couldn't tell thegender of the first person there. which is true 99% of the time at Dinah Shore.

Mark Stuart-William, head professional at the club, said that the last three holes on the course were closed while police conducted inquiries

This is even better than the headline sugg...hey, wai....

Mark Stuart-William, head professional at the club, said that the last three holes on the course were closed while police conducted inquiries

This just keeps getting better! Every club needs one of these! Preferably not a dude, though. Beer cart girl, maybe...

"Put your fingers in a dyke? Hey, Manny, you hear this?"

wanted for questioning?

/hot... ummm kinda odd but hot

FTFA...badly burned body with a missing foot.....between the 17th and 18th holes....

/Sounds like a pretty big handicap.

Awwwww, bullshiat.

I've watched enough CSI, L&O, NCIS, and Criminal Minds to know that some twerp on the scene can easily idenitify gender at a glance by merely walking near the pelvis.

upright_apes_r_us: FTFA...badly burned body with a missing foot.....between the 17th and 18th holes....

/Sounds like a pretty big handicap.

You're as bad as us. My friends and I were golfing a few years back on Memorial Day. There was this group behind us, and one guy only had 1 arm. It was about the 3rd hole where I go, "I wonder what his handicap is?" Ohhh we laughed so hard, then as the giant prick I am go, "and he probably lost that arm in Vietnam, and it's Memorial Day."
/yup, i know. window seat please.

Obligatory post?

Dyke Golf Club in Brighton

This keeps getting better.

/Brighton is the San Francisco combined with Provincetown of England

Mark Stuart-William, head professional at the club, said that the last three holes on the course were closed while police conducted inquiries.

"It's quite surreal," he said. "The course was quietening off just as the body was found so it hasn't had much of an impact on the day really."

It's surreal that people talk like that in everyday language.

This golf course is not very challenging, as there is only one foot between 17th and 18th holes.

Dick_Hertz: This golf course is not very challenging, as there is only one foot between 17th and 18th holes.

Shouldn't you convert that to centimeters?

Um... giggity?

FTA: However, detectives revealed that it had been mutilated, with at least one foot missing below the shin.

Wasn't sure which joke to go with. Yes article writer, most people's feet are located below the shin. Then I saw the "at least one" and wondered if they were not sure if two or more feet had been removed (below the shin of course).

FlyingPenguini: wanted for questioning?

/hot... ummm kinda odd but hot

when i was in grade school the appropriate sound was "pilsbury"

The Northwestern University football team used to play at Dyche Stadium. It has since been named Ryan Field (after Pat Ryan!).

Mock26: The Northwestern University football team used to play at Dyche Stadium. It has since been named Ryan Field (after Pat Ryan!).

But not that Pat Ryan.....
GO WILDCATS (and Eagles if only they would name Mike Kafka starting QB)

Agatha Crispy: Mock26: The Northwestern University football team used to play at Dyche Stadium. It has since been named Ryan Field (after Pat Ryan!).

But not that Pat Ryan.....
GO WILDCATS (and Eagles if only they would name Mike Kafka starting QB)

:-D

FTA: Quietening

The opposite of Earschplittenloudenboomer I presume.