Her cherry is rotten and she has fruit flies.

bighasbeen: If I were a genie and some dude wished for a virgin, I'd send him her.

I can see them being sent in blocks of 72...

Yeah right. She's probably taken it in the hoop many times.

/drunk, needs sleep now...

Living to 106 without sex/love/relationships?! I would have died of boredom long before then...

"She did like the odd sherry though."

Oh, she's a lesbian. Gotcha.

"She's always lived in Edinburgh and worked for 35 years as a private secretary"

"And she had a high-powered job"

Haha, that's adorable.

VIRGIN?

The Howard Foundation frowns on her shenanigans.

Just because you can't remember it doesn't mean it didn't happen.

"Sex?"
*recalls the past 40, 50, 60, 70 years of her life*
"Nope, never had it."

/volunteers

Deacon Blue: This lady was already 37 years old when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor

You know who else bombed Pearl Harbor?

Ah, so the morals of this story: rohypnol takes away all the bad memories, and what you don't know can't hurt you.


Also, obvious and obligatory:

These people want me to sit by while they tell ME what to do. fark that!

I had her in '72.

Of course, she was only 68 at the time.

Deacon Blue: Think about it, though. This lady was already 37 years old when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor, and in her sixties when St. Ronnie was first elected president. She was in her 20's when Pretty Boy Floyd and Machinegun Kelly were making headlines. Somebody needs to interview her about how she saw famous historical events, and just about her life in general.

Kind of like you remember the election of Tony Blair, and would want to document it in 60 years or so?

I'm also fairly certain she was quite occupied by the time pearl harbor came around. You know, because her country was being continuously barraged by the Germans.

Also, the Brits don't give much of a fark about prohibition era gangsters either, since they never found alcohol to be quite as much of a public nuisance.

/rtfa

Hilary T. N. Seuss: "She did like the odd sherry though."

Oh, she's a lesbian. Gotcha.

I was assuming "flower club" was a euphemism...

"You mean you have to choose between a life without sex and a gruesome death?"

/Tough call.
//100+ years and no sex is gruesome.

Picture of her from "the old days".

/i still demand to know why she threw the damn diamond back in the ocean
//that poor dude was spending millions to try to recover it, she had it all along and didn't even want it apparently

I wanna slap her niece for repeatedly referring to auntie in the past tense.

"She did like the odd sherry..."
"She was wrapped up in her church..."
"She never had time to be sad..."

WOOHOO!!! I'm gonna live forever!!

i bet she gives one hell of a gummer

Deacon Blue: Think about it, though. This lady was already 37 years old when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor, and in her sixties when St. Ronnie was first elected president. She was in her 20's when Pretty Boy Floyd and Machinegun Kelly were making headlines. Somebody needs to interview her about how she saw famous historical events, and just about her life in general.

ummm, pretty sure others have already posted that the Germans id not bomb Pearl Harbor. Just posting this because I think you are an ass.

jaytkay: "She did like the odd sherry..."



Sherry Britton would like a word.

I call shenanigans.

Outside of being a cloistered nun, I don't see how you can go through life without a sexual encounter. Esp. in wartime Britain- things got nice and loose over there.

I call this, 'I want my family to think I was a virgin".

Would be hysterical if her 70 year old son, that she gave up for adoption, stepped forward.

But she's kept vibrator and battery companies in business for 100 years

These are the Darwin Award criteria:

Reproduction - Out of the gene pool: 1)dead or 2)sterile.
None whatsoever. - 1)Yes, as good as. Some parts definitely. 2)Yes, even if miraculously not, no one's wanting to find out.

Excellence - Astounding misapplication of judgment.
One of a kind. - Yes, the mind boggles.

Self-Selection - Cause one's own demise.
Yes. - Own choice.

Maturity - Capable of sound judgment.
Hell freaking yes, literally! - Okay, devout churchgoer. But must have been at some point.

Veracity - The event must be true.
Well, the Sun is there. - Let's assume so.

old_toole: Sweet
I take this to mean I'm going to live forever!!!

I got to get out of the basement.

Rickerkioz: WOOHOO!!! I'm gonna live forever!!

I'd bet half the people on fark will live a long, long time.

well-tabbed.

RangerVet75: ummm, pretty sure others have already posted that the Germans id not bomb Pearl Harbor. Just posting this because I think you are an ass.

Im not sure if it kept her alive when she was young....but it would probably kill her now.

Old people have kinda a kooky way of thinking though. On hearing of my dietary preference, my grandmother made me a delicious vegetarian soup (so I'm told). It had bacon in it - but not *much* bacon. You see where I'm going with this?

Well it feels like you live longer....

Oznog: /i still demand to know why she threw the damn diamond back in the ocean
//that poor dude was spending millions to try to recover it, she had it all along and didn't even want it apparently

crumblecat:A bigger question is why the stupid girl didn't stay in the lifeboat. If she hadn't jumped out, Leonardo would have been on his own with that bit of wreckage and there would have been room for him to climb out. Basically she killed him.

And WHY would a ship with a huge crew and lookouts NOT notice a huge friggin iceberg in the middle of the ocean, nothing in the way, that they slowly plowed right into?

This movie was full of plot holes.