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(SeattlePI) Weird Man gathering sweet corn in Michigan confronts alligator. No, this headline did not come from a Mad Libs book   (seattlepi.com) divider line 42
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5416 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Sep 2010 at 8:47 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



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Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 05:57:41 PM
No, this headline did not come from a mad-libs book

Well, duh.

The words "booger" and "poop" are conspicuously absent.
 
Walker [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 06:13:03 PM
THE ALLIGATOR APOCALYPSE IS UPON US! WE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE ZOMBIES. WE WERE SO WRONG!

/a little drunk
 
Gwendolyn [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 06:53:15 PM
He killed it?

WTF asshole. It was a three foot long alligator. It wasn't going to eat the children.

IT'S COMING RIGHT FOR US!!!!
 
BKITU [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 07:21:24 PM
Link (new window)
 
Aarontology [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 07:36:28 PM
I hope he gets to eat it. Alligator is pretty tasty.
 
Clete Orris
2010-09-03 08:50:00 PM
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: No, this headline did not come from a mad-libs book

Well, duh.

The words "booger" and "poop" are conspicuously absent.

newcomicreviews.com
 
loonatic112358
2010-09-03 08:55:15 PM
Walker: THE ALLIGATOR APOCALYPSE IS UPON US! WE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE ZOMBIES. WE WERE SO WRONG!

/a little drunk

nah man, it's time for the seasonal gator migration to the acadian homelands where they will feast on poutine
 
Balchinian
2010-09-03 08:55:26 PM
In Michigan, all trucks come with their own 4-foot bar. It's BYOB though.

Yes, img60.exs.cx!!!
 
Majin_Buu
2010-09-03 08:57:56 PM
Oh my god!! I have to get to the Penis Tower! To the Wooldolorien!
 
tenaciousdave
2010-09-03 09:02:13 PM
Feed me sweet corn!

i.imgur.com
 
Clete Orris
2010-09-03 09:03:31 PM
 
Jorge Sum
2010-09-03 09:04:38 PM
You think I like Albert Einstein baking me nipple pies?!
 
JonnyG
2010-09-03 09:05:19 PM
How's that Global Warming™ working out for you guys?
 
Cowin Myundies
2010-09-03 09:06:45 PM
Damn you Al Gore! Damn you to Hell!
 
Kevin72
2010-09-03 09:07:48 PM
Global Warmingists getting excited over the good news. If only we had cap-and-trade and Kyoto Protocol, this wouldn't have happened!
 
tcan
2010-09-03 09:13:47 PM
It doesn't take much thinking to realize this gator is too small to have migrated there. This is another dumped pet.
 
Sexy Republican Girl
2010-09-03 09:15:06 PM
If I saw an alligator that size up north I think I would just go "oh neat" then go on my way knowing that come winter time it would be gone.

I don't see the reason to report it let alone kill it.
 
rohar
2010-09-03 09:20:18 PM
graphics8.nytimes.com

Just 'cause
 
aearra
2010-09-03 09:21:08 PM
why am I not surprised at the response by republican girl. At that length it could have been an exotic pet the owner could no longer afford.
 
orava
2010-09-03 09:26:13 PM
3 feet? Half of that is tail, and the head maybe the size of a hand. That guy is a wuss and a douche.
 
The_Time_Master
2010-09-03 09:32:32 PM
 
Yakk
2010-09-03 09:43:09 PM
tcan: It doesn't take much thinking to realize this gator is too small to have migrated there. This is another dumped pet.

If two swallows...
 
Dellirium
2010-09-03 09:44:53 PM
Well, he missed out on making a nice wallet...

and deep-fried alligator hush puppies.
 
Bullroarer_Took
2010-09-03 09:49:50 PM
Yakk: tcan: It doesn't take much thinking to realize this gator is too small to have migrated there. This is another dumped pet.

If two swallows...

...then three through ten can go ahead and go home, we found what we're looking for.
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 09:56:47 PM
Balchinian: In Michigan, all trucks come with their own 4-foot bar. It's BYOB though.

Yes, !!!

The feeeeeeling's foreeeeever!
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 09:59:38 PM
Ha! Sturgis!

I only know one person from there... he's lived off the grid for 3 years running now. And my bunny came from there.

Small world.
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 10:01:45 PM
I'm glad the alligator didn't eat my bunny before I got him.

But now I wonder if it was dogs or the alligator that ate two of my friend's ducks when he was living there. He never did find out.

That was a few years ago, though, so if it did that must mean the alligator got used to South Michigan winters...

oh shiat.
 
rohar
2010-09-03 10:02:15 PM
StreetlightInTheGhetto: Ha! Sturgis!

I only know one person from there... he's lived off the grid for 3 years running now. And my bunny came from there.

Small world.

Is bunny a euphemism for something? If not, that sentence just got terribly boring ;)
 
Clete Orris
2010-09-03 10:05:20 PM
rohar: StreetlightInTheGhetto: Ha! Sturgis!

I only know one person from there... he's lived off the grid for 3 years running now. And my bunny came from there.

Small world.

Is bunny a euphemism for something? If not, that sentence just got terribly boring ;)

Yes, it really means rabbit. Shhhhhhh.... no one's supposed to know.
 
rohar
2010-09-03 10:06:44 PM
Clete Orris: rohar: StreetlightInTheGhetto: Ha! Sturgis!

I only know one person from there... he's lived off the grid for 3 years running now. And my bunny came from there.

Small world.

Is bunny a euphemism for something? If not, that sentence just got terribly boring ;)

Yes, it really means rabbit. Shhhhhhh.... no one's supposed to know.

Do we eat it, pet it, fap or all three?
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 10:13:12 PM
rohar: StreetlightInTheGhetto: Ha! Sturgis!

I only know one person from there... he's lived off the grid for 3 years running now. And my bunny came from there.

Small world.

Is bunny a euphemism for something? If not, that sentence just got terribly boring ;)

Hey, he's an awesome bunny. If you say 'Rory Calhoun', he stands on his hind legs and walks.

I've never actually been there - driven past it a million times, but I missed the roadtrip where my friend was picked up and the bunny was gotten.

So as far as I know, Sturgis is a crazy mysterious place where you can drink and drive if you're a local (you cannot become a local), things eat ducks in apparently secured pens, people beat alligators with metal rods, awesome standing and walking bunnies live as well as at least one witch, if you know the right people mopeds and RVs from the 1960s can be obtained for ridiculously cheap prices, and everybody knows your name.

I've worked in nearly every Michigan city 30 minutes away from there (semi-circle style), so I know that's probably not true. But now I can't actually go there lest the vision in my head get shattered.
 
Gyrfalcon [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 10:16:23 PM
Walker: THE ALLIGATOR APOCALYPSE IS UPON US! WE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE ZOMBIES. WE WERE SO WRONG!

/a little drunk

No need to apologize. YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT!!!
 
Were_Outta_Bort_License_Plates
2010-09-03 10:29:25 PM
tenaciousdave: Feed me sweet corn!

Holy shiat look out, Conker!

/returns to the long, shameful lurk
 
Jocundry
2010-09-03 10:30:12 PM
StreetlightInTheGhetto: So as far as I know, Sturgis is a crazy mysterious place where you can drink and drive if you're a local (you cannot become a local), things eat ducks in apparently secured pens, people beat alligators with metal rods, awesome standing and walking bunnies live as well as at least one witch, if you know the right people mopeds and RVs from the 1960s can be obtained for ridiculously cheap prices, and everybody knows your name.

And Mini Me (Verne Troyer) is from Sturgis!
 
Ow My Balls
2010-09-03 10:41:07 PM
StreetlightInTheGhetto: Ha! Sturgis!

I only know one person from there... he's lived off the grid for 3 years running now.

Hmmm. I think I might know this person. Did he once have a pet white duck named "Goliath" that was erroneously thought to be a male? (no, I'm not kidding)

Jocundry

And Mini Me (Verne Troyer) is from Sturgis!

I thought it was Centreville?
 
Wert789
2010-09-03 10:42:10 PM
Nothing new. When I was a kid in the 60's, an alligator was caught on the Grand River near Grand Rapids. It went to a local zoo.

What happens is a lot of people have the winter off because some jobs, such as construction, are too difficult in the snow. They go on unemployment and some pop down to the South. A few people will bring back baby alligators but will let them loose when they realize what lousy and big pets they are. Of course they just dump them in the nearest river or creek.
 
buckler [TotalFark]
2010-09-03 10:42:15 PM
Remember: when being chased by an alligator, run in a zig-zag pattern. Gators can run fast, but they can't turn for shiat.
 
feanturi
2010-09-03 10:52:17 PM
Good thing it wasn't a 4-foot alligator, because he'd have to find a 5-foot bar and then he'd be farked.
 
platedlizard
2010-09-03 11:54:50 PM
People who keep alligators as pets are douches. The reptile store near me has a rescue gator that someone kept in a tank and never cleaned. It was severely stunted. If it ever gets too big it'll be sent to an alligator farm in Florida like the last three they had.
 
Pop Goes The Weasel
2010-09-04 12:12:02 AM
I wonder if it escaped from here

http://www.alligatorsanctuary.com/
 
NephilimNexus [TotalFark]
2010-09-04 04:58:22 AM
Alligators in Michigan... y'know I going to bookmark this for the next time someone claims global warming is a hoax.
 
myinternetname
2010-09-04 11:17:09 AM
Quick, call Swamp People!
 
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