This headline is a mess. I hereby sentence submitter to a "temporary" stay at Ravensbook Literacy Camp to help him concentrate.

I love the video footage. Shots of the woman's home and the woman's face... with the woman's home and the woman's face censored out of them. What's the point?

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: YOU WANNA BE A FARMER?

HERE'S A COUPLE OF ACHORS

ARHGHGHGHBWARHRAHGHGHGHGHGH

I love you.

That sounds very painful

Approves (NOT safe for work):
Link

Satanic_Hamster: Approves (NOT safe for work):
Link

You are a friend and a gentleman.

Man I miss SLO county

Awww, I was hoping Aunt Irma was visiting at the same time...

That is wrong cringeinducingmitter. If the cuffs were off, why didn't she flee?

ma'am*

"Personal glove box" is my new favourite term for vagina.

//mmm... vagina

AbbeySomeone: That is wrong cringeinducingmitter. If the cuffs were off, why didn't she flee?

Hard to run with a pair of handcuffs up your twat, I imagine.

So she says she crashed her car in her garage, was upset and downed some liquor.

AbbeySomeone: That is wrong cringeinducingmitter. If the cuffs were off, why didn't she flee?

Maybe she was holding out for one of their radios.

/hot

I'm not quite sure what is harder to imagine. A woman getting out of handcuffs without keys, or fitting them in her cooch.

We were discussing what not to say during emergencies in our EMT class.

Our instructor said his co-worker got into trouble because when responding to a call where a man had a frozen trout stuck in his rectum he said to his friends "you should really tell your buddy to chew his food better."

Evidently as the fins thawed out the trout could keep going deeper but could not come back out.

Disaagrajag: "Personal glove box" is my new favourite term for vagina.


Disapproved of glove box metaphor.

How did she get the handcuffs off then hide them?

I have a theory that includes fisting, fluids, and mastering kegel exercises.

She snatched 'em

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: YOU WANNA BE A FARMER?

HERE'S A COUPLE OF ACHORS

ARHGHGHGHBWARHRAHGHGHGHGHGH

I just lol'd hard for several minutes. Nice work.

And Submitter shouldn't be allowed to post ANYTHING on Fark again until he/she learns how to speak English.

I wonder why they didn't mention her previous arrest for animal cruelty?

I'm even more impressed that they were double-locked. That means they would neither tighten nor release, so she had them shoved in there in the same position they were placed on her wrists. Wowsa.

offacue: She snatched 'em

Can I clone you and keep it as a pet?

My, what a large vagina you have. meeoooowwwwwww

rebelyell2006: I'm not quite sure what is harder to imagine. A woman getting out of handcuffs without keys, or fitting them in her cooch.

There is probably a department near you hiring unimaginative, low level, incompetents.

This story made me make a disappointed face.

hobodojo: offacue: She snatched 'em

Can I clone you and keep it as a pet?

Yeah. Pet with benefits please.

offacue: hobodojo: offacue: She snatched 'em

Can I clone you and keep it as a pet?

Yeah. Pet with benefits please.

This thread is perfectly fine without pics.

I disagree with the charge of petty theft for snatching the cuffs. If they didn't want her to have the cuffs, why did they put them on her?

I'll bet that kid will in no way be teased until the day he graduates. His mom is going to be the punchline of a thousand jokes.

fark2105: We were discussing what not to say during emergencies in our EMT class.

Our instructor said his co-worker got into trouble because when responding to a call where a man had a frozen trout stuck in his rectum he said to his friends "you should really tell your buddy to chew his food better."

Evidently as the fins thawed out the trout could keep going deeper but could not come back out.


lie/urban legend/you're full of crap

Link to the article is farked.

I bet that lady would fit right in with these people: Link (new window)

I hope her 11 year old son is home schooled. Otherwise his life at school is going to be pure living hell for quite a while.

offacue & Mykeru owe me a new keyboard.

eatin' fetus: lie/urban legend/you're full of crap

People do strange things. I've put body parts in places that smell like trout.

offacue: hobodojo: offacue: She snatched 'em

Can I clone you and keep it as a pet?

Yeah. Pet with benefits please.

He'll even have his own closet to sleep in.

/still will share a bowl with the cats.
//I ain't made of money, dammit!

I got the feeling that the spokesman in the video who was relaying the details was doing everything he could to not burst out laughing.

altinos: I disagree with the charge of petty theft for snatching the cuffs. If they didn't want her to have the cuffs, why did they put them on her?

They wanted to see if she'd cuff the snatch.

Soup bone?

"Where did you hide that?"

"That's none of your business."



(According to Google, this is a picture of Maria Conchita Alonso)