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(   Help the Olsen Twins find out who's stalking them on your Playstation (note customer reviews at bottom)   ( divider line
    More: Scary  
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7872 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Oct 2001 at 8:08 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

59 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-10-10 08:12:52 AM  
That is just terrible. I swear I was NEVER into that kind of stuff when I was twelve.

What the hell is a tween anyway?
2001-10-10 08:20:59 AM  
Man, I can't wait till they are 18 and start making made-to-order hardcore porn tapes for f****
2001-10-10 08:23:11 AM  
18? Bah cant wait that long. Come to holland and they can start doing nudies at 16/17.

Im sure a playboy spread is on the cards.
2001-10-10 08:23:39 AM  
The downfall of Atari in the early 80's was when they started to come out with crappy games. E.T. comes to mind immediately. I hope Playstation doesn't fall into the same trap...but judging from this release, they can't be too far behind.

FYI, a tween is a loser kid, that isn't a teenager yet - but isn't a child anymore. I think a child is someone aged under 9. So we are talking someone between the ages of 10 and 12.
2001-10-10 08:24:39 AM  
Wow, thanks for that link! I can't believe I wasted my time reading some jerk's unnecessary comments about the state of video game development.

Wait, what did I just do?...
2001-10-10 08:31:40 AM  
Video games are makeing the same amout of money as motion pictures (if you take away the food and drink cost).

Of course companys are going to hire a basement devloper to make a advertisement for a game. Plus they reel in all the fan base so they get good game sales AND popularity for there product. its simple really there is nothing you can really do about it besides DONT BUY THE GAME! if you dont like it JUST DONT BUY IT.

jesus buttfarking christ
2001-10-10 08:53:06 AM  
Hell-bent, who said anything about buying the game? This wasn't submitted for you to purchase the game, it was just to look at the funny comment. Which I agree with, why are they making this shiat, and I am most definately not buying the game, and I am sure plenty of Farkers arn't as well (like anyone would admit to it).
2001-10-10 08:53:43 AM  
In the 1950's and before, a tween someone someone in there twenties who still acted like a teen.
I mean, I wasn't around back then, it's just what I heard.
If this is true, it's strange to see how the meaning has changed.
2001-10-10 08:59:18 AM  
June 13, 2004 they turn 18.

That's all I got to say.

BTW, the review that is featured is hilarious! The site is obviously not moderated.
2001-10-10 09:00:05 AM  
I heard somewhere that the Olsen twins will get their driver's licenses soon. And they will also get Range Rovers. 16 year old girls with Range Rovers. hmmmm
2001-10-10 09:07:04 AM  
What the hell are NCA cheerleaders?
2001-10-10 09:10:25 AM  
Check those reviews in a couple of days. I'm sure farkers won't let that pass.
2001-10-10 09:24:29 AM  
Damn. It choked on my review.

"I hated this game until I found the codez to see there panties. The internet rulez!"
2001-10-10 09:26:47 AM  
Sounds like that fellow played "Custer's Revenge" in the early eighties. Or maybe "Death Race" in the seventies.
2001-10-10 09:27:03 AM  
Funky - National Cheerleaders Association. Now we know that Mary-Kate and Ashley are sanctioned.
2001-10-10 09:33:06 AM  
I could have spent the few moments I spent looking at that site about that piece of shiat game doing something more productive, like bashing my thumb with a hammer, dropping a brick on my foot, or trying to staple my hand to the desk. All of which, incidentally, are less painful than any Olsen-related movie or TV show or game or whatever else is.
2001-10-10 09:39:54 AM  
Hey, lay off ET for the "Atari 260", I actually enjoyed playing that game! Find phone pieces, call ship, go home,lather, rinse, repeat. Wheeee....
2001-10-10 09:40:40 AM  
Reviews are moderated (!). I sent one in titled "Eye-Gouging soon to follow".
2001-10-10 09:44:51 AM  
I've been tempted to buy that silly Cosmopolitan makeover software for the PC since it's in the clearence bin just to see what fun I can make from the program.
2001-10-10 09:48:23 AM  
There's someone on my PS stalking the Olsen twins?
2001-10-10 09:49:03 AM  
Heres what I posted, I wonder if this will slide past.

Oh my stars and garters!
Fairly interesting game with lots of issues for the young adult set. I found the visit to the plastic surgeon for implants fairly disturbing (you have to hit the O button repeatedly to increase the saline amount), not to mention the god awful "career" section when satans minions, I mean the twins, discuss how to get fake I.D. and approach Bob Guccioni Sr. for "modeling" jobs (press the X buton three times to get the job). Ecccch.

Any bets if it will pass?
2001-10-10 10:06:29 AM  
Dose anyone belive for a moment that a "reguler" customer wrote this review??????

" A customer on 10/3/2001 writes:
Crush course is a fun, imaginative romp through a realistic scholastic setting. Variety, and amusement are key elements in the game, and it posseses a great replayable quality. An overall good time. "

BS this was written by a dam MARKETING kok suker....
god i hate MARKETING
2001-10-10 10:11:02 AM  
that's hilarious PvtStash!! an imaginative romp!!! ha hahahahahahhahah haha
2001-10-10 10:14:58 AM  
I've been tempted to buy that silly Cosmopolitan makeover software for the PC since it's in the clearence bin just to see what fun I can make from the program.>>

I smell a new Fark category:
-- Makeover this pic --
My first suggestion for the category:
[image from too old to be available]
2001-10-10 10:29:56 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2001-10-10 10:32:31 AM  
That second review is right on the money!! I once rented "mary-kate & ashley-olsen's mystical mall" and I beat that game in 2 hours (though I never tried to unlock the hidden levels). BTW, didn't they have a magazine out? whatever happened to it?
2001-10-10 10:46:16 AM  
:falls to the ground twitching: Make them stop....
2001-10-10 10:58:23 AM  
"mary-kate & ashley-olsen's mystical mall" - I assume that's not a Half-Life mod or something?
2001-10-10 11:21:45 AM  
Omni, H&S Media (who's also published such fine magazines as Beanie Baby World, World of Wrestling, and a pub about YO-YOs) went bankrupt. I got the bankruptcy statement for them, and if you wish, you can purchase the assets of Mary & Kate Magazine for mere $1.1Million.
2001-10-10 11:27:20 AM  
Rberry(love your X E articles btw), is that company listed on recently?

I know PurpleMoon, the software company that aimed towards girls went into the black and was bought out by another company.

The Olsen Twins magazine, wait, didn't you review it or am I thinking I saw a review on another site? They had no less than 56 pictures of them on one issue.
2001-10-10 11:53:16 AM  
I'll play it if at the end of the game, after I beat it(the game, i mean), I get to hit em both in the pooper.
2001-10-10 12:00:20 PM  
I'm willing to be they're going to start doing drugs when they get older.. They could be called Mary Jane and Hashley.
2001-10-10 12:16:31 PM  
ninja's. somebody dispatch some ninja's mui pronto. I'm sick to fvcking christ of these two.
2001-10-10 12:25:32 PM  
Is the act of actually OWNING a Mary Kate and Ashley Olson Playstation game a CLUE that you might be stalking them?
2001-10-10 12:25:49 PM  
My bland dull meaningless life now has purpose! I will help the Olsen twins find their stalker! And then they will thank me and we'll go and have ice cream and play some miniature golf and after that we'll go clothes shopping and then after the shopping we'll play in the park and fly a kite and maybe call some friends and then on to Chuck E. Cheese for a wonderful dinner and after dinner we'll have a slumber party (and tell ghost stories) and we'll be best friends forever and it will be GREAT! NOBODY better beat the game before I do though, that would not be nice. AND KATE AND ASHLEY DO NOT LIKE PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT NICE!
2001-10-10 12:31:05 PM  
I wonder if their managers ever dressed them up like whores and force them to make-out with eachother ...
2001-10-10 12:36:13 PM  
Mary-Kate (the girl with two first names) and Ashley must over come tons of obstacles to uncover a plethora of stalkers lurking in this game. The terrible twosome long known for a string of painful movies and TV specials has made the leap into the virtual world in this stunning game for the play station. Tweens and middle-aged men will enjoy cheerleading and dance numbers as the girls uncover their secret admirers. Carnal desires explode onto the screen as the girls play the dangerous game of stalking their stalkers. Parents will enjoy the subversive western religion undertones and may want to follow up with a subscription to the twin's kooky magazine ( for their children.
2001-10-10 12:36:51 PM  
Hopefully EB will publish my review - but I doubt it.
2001-10-10 12:38:28 PM  
I don't think my review will make the cut.

User name Turd Burgler (lapse in creativity there), '3 years til soft porn -- mark my words' as the simple message.
2001-10-10 12:39:29 PM  
OK, so I have to say the obvious. Wouldn't it be a better game (from the averager farker's perspective, anyway) if you could BE the stalker? With guns, and knives, and swords, and a high-powered staplegun, or maybe a 5-gallon bucket of leeches, or a couple of rabid ferrets...
2001-10-10 12:42:26 PM  
Finally, a game I can relate to!
2001-10-10 01:09:05 PM  
It might be pretty cool if it utilizes force feedback.
2001-10-10 01:22:40 PM  
I think that the "Twins" made the same deal with the devil that Martha Stewart did.
2001-10-10 01:26:02 PM  
hell, i'll solve that problem for you.... I am stalking the olsen twins.... bwah hahahaha
2001-10-10 02:17:16 PM  
They are sooooooo hot!!
Retrocrush has a link to a counter- counting down days minutes and seconds until they turn 18. I too feel the porn coming!
2001-10-10 02:23:05 PM  

Keep the sharp stuff....

The leeches sound interesting, though... Maybe some eels...
2001-10-10 02:30:55 PM  
Holy shiat. Someone produces crap like this?
2001-10-10 03:01:34 PM  
Well, I guess this answers the question! Is the darned German NATO AWACS crew!! Those whacky guys!

[image from too old to be available]
2001-10-10 03:43:38 PM  
hahah wow..they didn't even edit out that roll of fat on the one on the lefts' neck....silly stuff.
2001-10-10 04:35:59 PM  
"This game is rated "RP" for Rating Pending."

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