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(Huffington Post)   Christian Broadcasting Network warns that most of the candy sold during this Halloween season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches. Silver Shamrock unavailable for comment   (huffingtonpost.com ) divider line
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9605 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Aug 2010 at 3:50 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



271 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2010-08-25 11:28:11 AM  
good one, subby! whatever happened to that hot chick?
 
2010-08-25 11:32:23 AM  
CBN: Don't forget to hang a witch for Christ this Halloween.

www.wtps.org
 
2010-08-25 11:38:08 AM  
Isn't it a little early for this shiat?

What's next, ginning up the 'war on christmas' around Bastille Day?
 
2010-08-25 11:45:29 AM  
Well, only the good candy, that is. I mean, they can still have Smarties without any nefarious repercussions.
 
2010-08-25 11:53:35 AM  
Candy corn, on the other hand, is still made with the devil's hemorrhoids.
 
2010-08-25 12:03:26 PM  
Butterfingers are the work of the devil. Send them to me and I will see that they are properly disposed of. It's the least I can to save the precious snowflakes.
 
2010-08-25 12:21:52 PM  
I have several Born-Again Chrstian cousins. One beleives whole-heartedly in witchcraft, and would eat this up. One loves stories about witches and vampires, and would larf, and one thinks both the others are loopy, "just like those who claim to see Christ's face on a pancake."

So even among Christian fundies, there is a whole gamut of sensibility.
 
2010-08-25 12:23:05 PM  
What the f*ck?

Obviously, they mistakenly think the Wiccans and such actually give a sh*t about them ;)
 
2010-08-25 12:30:17 PM  
Coming tomorrow from CBN: "Buy your 100% Christian candy here!"
 
2010-08-25 12:49:53 PM  
Are they referring to Rabbis overseeing kosher candy?
 
2010-08-25 01:09:50 PM  

Cewley: good one, subby! whatever happened to that hot chick?


her head melted and cockroaches ran out of her ears, duh!
 
2010-08-25 01:15:32 PM  
So, I'm thinking of being "Happy Eeyore" this year. I'll get an Eeyore costume, a sign that says "ask me about my tail reattachment surgery" and duck tape Prozac and Zoloft bottles to myself.

Any suggestions on making this costume better?
 
2010-08-25 01:23:16 PM  
Quick! I need a Chick Tract... STAT!
 
2010-08-25 01:34:19 PM  

what_now: So, I'm thinking of being "Happy Eeyore" this year. I'll get an Eeyore costume, a sign that says "ask me about my tail reattachment surgery" and duck tape Prozac and Zoloft bottles to myself.

Any suggestions on making this costume better?


wrap a zucchini in tin foil and go as Spinal Tap's bassist.
 
2010-08-25 01:37:01 PM  
This year I'm going to give out blotter paper with Pat Robbert's face.
 
2010-08-25 01:37:31 PM  
man, I totally want to hang out with pagans now. demonic candy!? i'm so there!
 
2010-08-25 01:41:04 PM  

robmilmel: Coming tomorrow from CBN: "Buy your 100% Christian candy here!"


Snake Oil brand Christian candy! Goes great with religion!
 
2010-08-25 01:45:28 PM  
I love that chocolate candy with the creamy demon nougat.
 
2010-08-25 01:45:45 PM  
I think the Huffington Post should cut back on the Huffing.
 
2010-08-25 01:46:04 PM  
I used to work with a guy from Hershey PA, and his wife was a TOTAL witch.

So yeah, I'm believing it. And I'm buying only Mars candies this Halloween.
 
2010-08-25 01:46:48 PM  
The older I get the more I believe that the Devil's greatest trick was actually convincing us that God exists.
 
2010-08-25 01:49:35 PM  
I wonder how much extra they charge for demon candy?
 
2010-08-25 01:51:51 PM  

GaryPDX: I think the Huffington Post should cut back on the Huffing.


Are you suggesting that their derision towards this statement from CBN is less than wholly deserved? Do you believe that demons will be invading your M&Ms this Halloween?
 
2010-08-25 01:52:08 PM  

GaryPDX: I think the Huffington Post should cut back on the Huffing.


Wait a second.

The article has this quote:

Pat Robertson's Christian Broadcasting Network posted a blog by Kimberly Daniels recently that warns Christians to forgo celebrating Halloween because of its evilness. Daniels specifically calls out candy as a source of soul-molestation:

"During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches."


And you think that HuffPo are the one's huffing paint?
 
2010-08-25 01:53:13 PM  

robmilmel: Coming tomorrow from CBN: "Buy your 100% Christian candy here!"


I'm sure that the kids that participate in the "Hell houses" are looking forward to their Christian Candy.
 
2010-08-25 01:53:44 PM  

what_now: So, I'm thinking of being "Happy Eeyore" this year. I'll get an Eeyore costume, a sign that says "ask me about my tail reattachment surgery" and duck tape Prozac and Zoloft bottles to myself.

Any suggestions on making this costume better?


an Enzyte "Smilin' Bob" T-shirt
 
2010-08-25 01:55:50 PM  

Torgo_of_Manos: And you think that HuffPo are the one's huffing paint?


I think all the parties in this are just passing around the can. I mean really, this is newsworthy?
 
2010-08-25 01:58:57 PM  

GaryPDX: Torgo_of_Manos: And you think that HuffPo are the one's huffing paint?

I think all the parties in this are just passing around the can. I mean really, this is newsworthy?


oh come on! demon candy dude! now I totally want some!
 
2010-08-25 01:58:59 PM  

what_now: So, I'm thinking of being "Happy Eeyore" this year. I'll get an Eeyore costume, a sign that says "ask me about my tail reattachment surgery" and duck tape Prozac and Zoloft bottles to myself.

Any suggestions on making this costume better?


Giant foam finger, announcing your status as number one?
 
2010-08-25 02:06:08 PM  

GaryPDX: Torgo_of_Manos: And you think that HuffPo are the one's huffing paint?

I think all the parties in this are just passing around the can. I mean really, this is newsworthy?


As far as, as group that has quite a large following, CBN, spewing nonsensical BS, then yes it is relevant and, I guess, newsworthy.

/and this is fark
 
2010-08-25 02:08:34 PM  

NuttierThanEver: an Enzyte "Smilin' Bob" T-shirt


Sgt Otter: Giant foam finger, announcing your status as number one?


But donkeys don't have fingers or wear tshirts....
 
2010-08-25 02:11:00 PM  

gilgigamesh: Isn't it a little early for this shiat?

What's next, ginning up the 'war on christmas' around Bastille Day?



Back to School is now followed immediately by Halloween (which is followed immediately by Christmas). Get with the program.
 
2010-08-25 02:11:08 PM  
miscellany.lolthulhu.com

throw one out to the H.P. fans
 
2010-08-25 02:32:55 PM  

what_now: So, I'm thinking of being "Happy Eeyore" this year. I'll get an Eeyore costume, a sign that says "ask me about my tail reattachment surgery" and duck tape Prozac and Zoloft bottles to myself.

Any suggestions on making this costume better?



Go as Poo instead.


/h
 
2010-08-25 02:37:57 PM  
Dang! They've figured us out! What now?

//I don't know whether to LOL, or facepalm...or both...
 
2010-08-25 02:38:05 PM  
That sucks. Bad enough that parents have to check the candy for poison and razors, now demons too?
 
2010-08-25 02:43:50 PM  
sharetv.org
Son, you're teasin' the gorilla in the monkey house.
 
2010-08-25 02:57:02 PM  
W
T
F
!

I wish they were prayed over by witches,

But noooo, they are prayed over by accountants.
 
2010-08-25 03:00:43 PM  
How do they know they are witches?
 
2010-08-25 03:01:34 PM  

I_Am_Weasel: How do they know they are witches?


By the wart.
 
2010-08-25 03:07:40 PM  
I never really had a sweet tooth and always preferred Chick Tracts to candy anyways.
 
2010-08-25 03:08:29 PM  

I_Am_Weasel: How do they know they are witches?


They're made of wood?
 
2010-08-25 03:11:17 PM  
First off, the "blog" is from 2009, so this is old news. The original link seems to be down, here's a mirror for those who want to read the whole blog:

http://www.charismamag.com/index.php/prophetic-insight/23723-the-dang​e​r-of-cel eb rating-halloween?showall=1 (new window)
 
2010-08-25 03:52:20 PM  
We've found some candy, may we burn it?
 
2010-08-25 03:52:53 PM  
Demons aren't real. Witches aren't real. Ghouls, goblins, angels, gods, heaven, hell...all fantasy. The only thing that's real is DELICIOUS CANDY!!!
 
2010-08-25 03:53:02 PM  

robmilmel: Coming tomorrow from CBN: "Buy your 100% Christian candy here!"


Don't forget the protein shakes, Pat Robinson personally makes sure there is special protein in each one.

It souldn't, but it just dumbfounds me that there are people who actually follow that twat waffle.
 
2010-08-25 03:54:40 PM  
"Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference."

s.bebo.com
 
2010-08-25 03:55:50 PM  

GaryPDX: I think the Huffington Post should cut back on the Huffing.


Does your knee hurt when it jerks like that?
 
2010-08-25 03:56:22 PM  
There is no such thing as witches, demons, or curses. They do not exist.

OK, your kids might act like demons after eating a bag of Halloween Candy, but that's it!
 
2010-08-25 03:56:31 PM  

KyngNothing: Are they referring to Rabbis overseeing kosher candy?


OH!
 
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