gilgigamesh: Isn't it a little early for this shiat?

What's next, ginning up the 'war on christmas' around Bastille Day?

considering there's a chance of christmas decorations at the hardware store right now, maybe?

These rubes never cease to amaze me.

Why can't Christianity be based on sound logical and scientific principles like Islam?

Are people really so benighted that they actually believe this? Are these people on crack or meth perhaps?

Religious fanatics of all kinds are annoying, but I'm particularly bothered by the ones who just make up their religion as they go along.

Go ahead and quote scripture to tell us what you think we should do. But don't just start writing your own material. I really doubt that there's anything in the bible outlining the process through which Halloween candy becomes demonized.

(Mike Watt voice)Speaking as a child of the 70's...

When I was growing up, churches in my town threw Halloween parties every year. What the fark is wrong with these religious farkwads today? They seem to fall all over themselves trying to prove how farking stupid they are.

no razor blades in candy this year?

Considering the sheer amount of candy passed out at halloween, one has to wonder at the logistics of the situation.

So to plan this all out Pat would have to tell us a few things.

1. How much candy can be prayed too (or over?) per prayer?

-Like can I just get one witch to pray over an entire store full of candy? Per bag?

2. How long does the prayer / curse last over the candy?

3. Do I become evil when I eat the preyed over candy or do I just get some demonic stomach ache?

4. When I purchase my candy, do I need an evil meter or something to make sure that my candy has been preyed over / cursed ?

5. Can I get a priest to undo the witch prayer?

Many things to consider with many implications. I never knew witches were so organized.

This is what Republicans actually believe.

Fine. I'll give out these:


mmmm..... Chocolate Jesus.

thamike: GoteamVenture: no razor blades in candy this year?

That was just apples, and it was a hoax invented by the Hershey Corporation.

lol is that true? i know its an urban legend but really?

OH NOES!!! they've figured out our dastardly plot to afflict their precious little snowflakes. I always laugh at these conspiracy stories about Pagans. A group of Pagans can't even get it together enough to get the A/C fixed in the 100 plus days of August in Texas or get it together enough to hold a themed potluck. I would rather herd my cats (at least they respond to being sprayed with water) than try to get a group of Pagans to do anything in any sort of concerted manner towards a common goal.

I think we've reached the point with these people that limitless and unending mockery and antagonism is the only answer. Shame them out of their beliefs.

$100 to the first president who dresses as the devil for halloween. Pat Robertson's head would explode. Which would only serve to entrench his followers beliefs further, as they would naturally assume the devil did it, but it would be worth seeing their indignant wallowing.

Of course candy is evil!
M & M means Murder and Mayhem!
Nougat is really the ejaculate of demons!
Baby Ruth is actually made from chopped up babies named Ruth!

I knew Wal-mart was full of witches! Ever since that lady with the bad teeth, hook nose, and warts became the greeter it had to be true!

\that's were I get my candy

I'm just gonna skip the candy this Halloween and hand out poisonous vipers. If the kids are good Christians, the Lord will protect them. The bad ones deserve what they get.

Oh man, Halloween is gonna SUCK this year.

/sworn off candy and treats
//down 50 lbs in 9 months

God Is My Co-Pirate: KyngNothing: Are they referring to Rabbis overseeing kosher candy?

OH! OY VEY!

/FTFY

Bad things happen with Christmas candy too.

One Bad Apple: Coconice: Prayed over by witches is bad?

Yeah, given that wiccan girls are all "earthy" and if they lift up their arms to pray over anything they will ultimately sprinkle it with pit hairs.

/Bon ape-tit

You've obviously never run across the Powder-Puff (and proud of it) Pagans. What do you mean I have to walk across the yard?!? Grass has bugs in it and they might get me! I respect nature and earthiness I just don't want anything to actually you know do with it on any kind of personal level. And I've had electrolysis so no pit hair.

TheTeethoftheTiger: I think we've reached the point with these people that limitless and unending mockery and antagonism is the only answer. Shame them out of their beliefs.

$100 to the first president who dresses as the devil for halloween. Pat Robertson's head would explode. Which would only serve to entrench his followers beliefs further, as they would naturally assume the devil did it, but it would be worth seeing their indignant wallowing.

I'm going as a vault resident, and would be amused to see the President dress similarly.

//Still have no idea how to make a Pip-Boy.

soseussme: I'm just gonna skip the candy this Halloween and hand out poisonous vipers. If the kids are good Christians, the Lord will protect them. The bad ones deserve what they get.

I know, right. Those wacky Christians.

I'm going to behead the male children for being non-believers and then rape, THEN behead the female children for exposing their whorish hair.

Allahu Akbar.

ftfa

"fetishes that open doors"


How does a fetish open a door?

Nice try, LHFMT.

May I suggest we fill this thread w/ pics of hot pagan/hippie/etc chicks?

smoochazoid: ftfa

"fetishes that open doors"


How does a fetish open a door?

perhaps it fell on it (referring to fetish as object, not as action)

My favourite CBN news story of all time was of a woman in Alabama who had been recently afflicted by Iforgetwhatosis. One night while watching The 700 Club she saw Pat Robertson pray for a woman in Alabama afflicted by Iforgetwhatosis---and lo (so she said) she was cured at once. Doctors were totally baffled.

The fact that she was watching a repeat of The 700 Club from several years back and that Pat could not possibly have been praying for a cure for a disease that had not yet begun merely added to the miracle, of course.

/The fool hath said in his heart, there is no such thing as coincidence.

It's not just candy, people! The forces of Satan have gotten into our ham, too!



/Hot as the lake of fire.

ArgusRun: Fine. I'll give out these:


mmmm..... Chocolate Jesus.

"This is my caramel and nougat which is given for thee.
Do this in remembrance of me."

/No matter how you slice it, it comes up pious!

As a Witch (not a Wiccan, but I practice something similar) this is just so silly. Why would I bother "praying" over candy? For what? Just to be mean? Why? It's just my religion, like any other. I don't believe in demons; that's a Christian thing. If they were making up lies about Jews "praying over candy" and causing it to be demonic, there would be a huge public relations nightmare. I don't know why this is any different.

It's weird that it's the Christians that are so obsessed with demons, devils, Satan, and all the stuff they are supposedly so afraid of. This really has just gotten to the point of insanity. Not content being scared of Harry Potter, NOW they're cooking up outright lies about Halloween candy? It's no wonder nobody takes them seriously.

I always wonder why all my Candy is gone before the rest of the Neighbor hood!

TheTeethofTheTiger: "I think we've reached the point with these people that limitless and unending mockery and antagonism is the only answer. Shame them out of their beliefs."

Careful now. The sort of person inclined to hold supernatural beliefs because they are more comforting than the alternative is liable to believe that anyone who mocks him for it is a fanatical zealot because that, too, is more comforting than the alternative.

ArgusRun: Fine. I'll give out these:


mmmm..... Chocolate Jesus.

Of course, the first thing I would do is bite his head off. Mmmm... sacrelicious.

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Long Haired FM Type: soseussme: I'm just gonna skip the candy this Halloween and hand out poisonous vipers. If the kids are good Christians, the Lord will protect them. The bad ones deserve what they get.

I know, right. Those wacky Christians.

I'm going to behead the male children for being non-believers and then rape, THEN behead the female children for exposing their whorish hair.

Allahu Akbar.

Dude, who cares about decapitations and the subjugation of women when there are people complaining about candy!

Of course, I know intellectually that having silly, irrational fears about demonic Bit-O-Honeys is FAR worse than the ritual forced removal of a young girl's clitoris without anasthesia. I mean, come on. Way worse. I just felt I had to bring up the double standard.

When I worked in the warehouse of; none ya business, I rubbed bacon over all the muslim/jewish kosher food.

I wanted to know if they would really explode if they come into contact with pork.

To my dismay, they did not.

So, why spend the money on it?

gilgigamesh 2010-08-25 11:38:08 AM Isn't it a little early for this shiat?
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Yeah, it's over 2 months to Halloween!

Doesn't that improve the taste? Hexes.