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(Excite)   New cars get hideous gas milage: Prepare to mine Alaska   ( divider line
    More: Asinine  
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3169 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Oct 2001 at 8:08 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

78 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-10-10 08:19:44 AM  
Hehe daddy is gonna get a navigator soon. 5.7 liters, close to single digit mileage. Damn ridiculus.

Thats why we need to send the army to the middle east. Control the supply, which leads to US being called coonts and the rest is history.
2001-10-10 08:20:04 AM  
"Bush administration officials... said safety must be paramount in any such decision."

How does increasing fuel efficiency effect safety? Oh, I get it, they mean the safety of their oil company stock.
2001-10-10 08:25:28 AM  
I drive an SUV because it's cool looking, comfortable, has 4 wheel drive for beach combing and chicks dig it. Screw gas mileage.
2001-10-10 08:43:40 AM  
Screw gas mileage and the environment, who cares? As long as people like Fb get to drive their "cool looking" gas guzzler.
2001-10-10 08:50:32 AM  
I drive one of those VW diesel beetles as my commuter car and a full size Dodge to tow the camper. Used to drive the truck to work everyday, but buying the beetle lowered my gas bill so much, it pays the monthly payment on the car. (Truck averages about 12 mpg. Beetle averages about 48 with an occasional low 50 if I don't run the A/C too much.) I had looked at the electric hybrids, but the Honda insight can only carry a total of 360 pounds. I weigh 265 so I could never carry someone in the car with me who weighs more than 95 pounds or I'd void the warranty. Yeah... my car smells funny sometimes and isn't the fastest car on the planet, but I laugh every time I drive by a gas station.
2001-10-10 08:56:03 AM  
people are short sighted. such a shame really. oh well, at least someone will have their perfect Canyonero joke opening...
2001-10-10 09:13:27 AM  
Damn straight, I will let you hippies take care of the gas problem for me. You drive your hippie electric car, I will drive my SUV. Problem solved.
2001-10-10 09:42:56 AM  
Fark yuppies with their fatarse SUVs and range rovers. The closest fools like FB have gone to being offroad was when they dropped their half-caf latte maple frappachino on their pleather shoes and drifted off into the ditch. The size of your car has nothing to do with the size of your nads.

I'm not saying we should all go out and buy Echoes, but buying a truck when you don't need one, or buying a SUV only because it "looks cool" is the height of stupidity.
2001-10-10 09:47:14 AM  
if: "buying a SUV only because it "looks cool" is the height of stupidity"

and: "I drive an SUV because it's cool looking, comfortable, has 4 wheel drive for beach combing and chicks dig it"

then: fb- = height of stupidity

weeeee! logic is fun
2001-10-10 09:50:22 AM  
I drive a car because it gets me from point A to point B. What more is needed? I like to have a more fuel efficient car, as I am a broke college student, and not having to fill up the tank every 40 miles is a real money saver. Maybe we should hike up the gas price to what it is in western Europe.
2001-10-10 09:51:04 AM  
Shouldn't this have an "Obvious" tag?
2001-10-10 09:59:03 AM  
[image from too old to be available]then: fb- = height of stupidity
2001-10-10 10:10:36 AM  
<sarcasm>I wonder why Europeans hate American cars.</sarcasm>
2001-10-10 10:14:57 AM  
DO you guys realize what would happen to us if we were cut off from the oil in the Middle East?? We would be so farked. It is ridiculous that we depend so heavily on their oil, especially now. We need to be self-sufficient through alternative sources of energy. Not only would this minimize the American presence in these Middle Eastern countries, it would be a hell of a lot better for the environment, save all of us a lot of money, and we WOULD be self-sufficient.
2001-10-10 10:16:45 AM  
I'd just like to add I really farking hate it when I see an old lady driving around by herself in a grocery store parking lot in a giant, tank like Ford Excursion. I mean, an old lady! What do old people need SUV's for anyway?
2001-10-10 10:21:12 AM  
Easy kiddies! Some SUV drivers actually NEED the gas sucking hogs.

Example: My property in Wisconsin in atop a ridge road with a 14% grade. In the winter you need 4WD, ice chains, and a locking diferental(sp?). Granted I get 19 MPG highway but a Honda Insight will not cut it.

So all you "green" people out there who have a problem with SUV's can head back to your granola crunching, keep rotating your compost piles and FARK off.

Have a nice day.
2001-10-10 10:23:34 AM  
The Crimson King, same thing for the business men and women around here who just commute 45 minutes to work driving a SUV. It's idiotic. Driving a huge ass car, talking on the phone, probably nothing in it except a gas can.

I drive an AWD vehicle too, but it gets 26MPG and my husband and I carpool to work. Maybe that makes me more of a hippie, but so be it. Here in Northern Michigan gas is a monopoly anyway, controlled by one guy who watches the tourism very closely.
2001-10-10 10:25:54 AM  
Irascible: obviously some people need it, like, duh! But the majority who drive them don't need them and just drive them because they (think they) look cool. Go America!
2001-10-10 10:35:07 AM  
Drive your little chump cars. Rusted out Nissan Sentra and Honda Accords. I don't mind. Don't hate the playah, hate the game.

only because it "looks cool" is the height of stupidity

I drive an SUV because it's cool looking, comfortable, has 4 wheel drive for beach combing and chicks dig it.

Clearly I have multiple reasons for driving it. Logic defeated.
2001-10-10 10:36:00 AM  
go ahead, buy those gas guzzlers

let's use up the remaining oil FASTER that way

the oil will run out before the environment becomes unrecoverable

after our economy collapses, and after the government realizes that we maybe should have spent some of that surplus on funding of renewable energy research, and after WW3 (caused by collapse of unstable oil-rich nations losing their only economy), then we can use the big SUV's as greenhouses
2001-10-10 10:36:11 AM  
Irascible: Following up on Pertifly. Take Fb- for example.
2001-10-10 10:39:21 AM  
Hahahaha.. anybody that thinks the world is going to fall into chaos and be destroyed in WW3 because Americans choose to drive SUV's needs to have their head examined.

I know, I know, everything is going to cause the horrible end of the world, I know. It's all a disaster and anybody that does differently than I think should be done is causing the end of the world, I know. (nods head and smiles sarcasticly)
2001-10-10 10:57:26 AM  
My 0.02-
There are many passenger cars that "look cool, are comfortable, and that chicks supposedly dig." examples: Mazda Protegé MP3, Toyota Celica GT, Acura RSX, Ford Focus ZX3 (This one is DAMN quick!)
As for beach combing, a small SUV, such as a Chevy Tracker, Jeep Wrangler(gotta be the best beach comber by far. Certainly the original.) Any of these smaller SUV's will do all that Fb says, and still get respectable gas mileage. As for people like Irascible, I really don't think anyone is pointing their criticism at you. Sure, there are people who need vehicles like this. Fine- drive them. But if you are the average suburban yahoo, whose only "off-road experience" is when you park on the grass, then I find this kind of wastefulness to be As for the safety issue, plenty of cars are extremely collision- worthy. In fact, most cars do better than SUV's, because they don't need to have heavy- duty frames to support them- they can have frames which absorb energy in a crash instead of transimtting it to the cars' occupants.
2001-10-10 10:58:42 AM  
Irascible - I agree with you that some people need it. Yours is probably the smartest reason for having 4WD I've seen here so far. The other is towing. That's why I have a full size truck (To pull the camper) and a diesel VW to drive to work every day. (48 MPG). If we could just cut down on the people driving gas guzzlers who don't really need them. (And if someone needs one to just look good, that's probably stretching it, but who am I to judge.)
2001-10-10 11:01:20 AM  
Just a follow up-

1) SUV's are handy for grabbing a slice in the back, something not possible in a Ford Focus.

2) SUV's provide valuable greenhouse gasses which will quadruple the property values in Wisconsin as people flee north to keep from being barbqued in Florida. :-)

God I'm cranky today.
2001-10-10 11:21:01 AM  

You're right...
everything is absolutely perfect.
2001-10-10 11:26:07 AM  
Of course, the reason most Europeans drive fuel efficient cars is that it is more expensive to drive due to higher taxes on the fuel. I don't know anyone who says "I drive a fuel efficient car because I am concerned about the evironment." Only people with more money than they know what to do with would consider driving an SUV here.
2001-10-10 11:27:17 AM  
Fb- ...Rusted out Nissan Sentra and Honda Accords.
I don't drive either and I'm damn proud of my Subaru Outback (a.k.a. Lesbaru, see last week's articles). It'll out perform your SUV any day of the week, and drives in the snow better.
2001-10-10 11:28:52 AM  

I doubt it. Besides, it doesn't snow in the virgin island too often. Seeing as how it has never dropped below 66 degree here.
2001-10-10 11:29:53 AM  
"I drive an SUV because it's cool looking"


fb wins joke of the day

does fb stand for fat bastard?

or farking bullshiat?
2001-10-10 11:30:04 AM  

Yeah.. everything is going pretty well right now. But's it certainly is much more exciting to pretend that the world is on the brink of total destruction.
2001-10-10 11:34:15 AM  
Whoever comes up to me in a "green" car and complains about my extraodrinarily low gas milage can go fark themselves.
I get low gas milage cause of the car I drive, and especially because of the way I drive it.

It's funny when people look at me expecting me to care.
2001-10-10 11:34:52 AM  
Chilly Willie

Honestly it is cool looking. And fun at the beach. Want to go riding on some old rain forest trails, blast for that too. Guess what, it's shallow, but chicks do dig it. Sorry bro, it's the truth.
2001-10-10 11:38:26 AM  
I drive the new Chevy Delusion 4x4. It has off-road capabilities which allows it to drive up a rockface at an 85 degree angle, GPS, brewery, cappucino maker, gas grill, a walk-in cooler, and it gets zero miles to the gallon. Plus, with it's S.T.E.A.L.T.H.(tm) Technology it is invisible to the naked eye. I basically hold the gas pump handle out in the air and pour the shiat on the ground. I am the yuppiest.
2001-10-10 11:52:15 AM  
I know a lot of people with suv's, I dont hate them, but it is amusing that they always mention the off-road capabilities of the vehicle.

REAL off-roaders use jeeps, scouts, and such, and you can tell they go off road. An Expedition or (ugh) excursion is just a really big VAN. 9 out of 10 times, the big VAN is occupied by one person.

I think Acura NSX's look good. Corvettes look good. SUV's look big, that's for sure. But hey, a difference of opinion is acknowledged.
2001-10-10 11:59:14 AM  
Ok, tell ya what. All you greenies sell you'r cars, start riding you'r bicycles or walking. And I will keep driving my V-10 Dodge ram, running over the ocasional spotted owl, while spraying gallons of freon into the atmosphere. When I'm done with that I'll go home, open all the windows, turn up the heat, walk out the back door into the crisp fall air and start burning sheets of pure virgin paper of the 100% unrecycled sort. I think I'll leave the truck running all night so it's warm in the morning.

fark off!!

and have a nice day.
2001-10-10 12:04:52 PM  
Oh, boy. Another SUV thread. Heh.
2001-10-10 12:13:33 PM  
Fb- is right. You cant expect the average ignorant moron to care about the enviroment. That why you need the government to take a lead.

That will happen as soon as Bush gets Big Oils dick out of his mouth. Which is never.
2001-10-10 12:13:55 PM  
Midgettossa: LOL!!!

Ace804: See your 2nd to last sentence and same to you!

My sister currently drives an Urban Assault Vehicle: Whatever Toyota's largest SUV is... Damn pathetic. She has 2 kids. Her reason was to shuttle more of her kid's friends from soccer practice: puke puke puke.

Here you go Junior: Here is your soccer practice... Oh and you have asthma and can't play soccer anymore? Well isn't that a shame...Someone should do something to clean up the air. Maybe I'll by you 1000 plastic toys you'll be bored w/ in 2 seconds.

My step-sister also drives some large U-A-V. And her 3 year old has his own little battery powered jeep. She thinks it's cute when he drives over to the neighbor's house and parks in the driveway to play w/ the neighbor kid. "How cute! My 3 year old is already becoming an iconic American lazy-ass!!!"
2001-10-10 12:26:51 PM  
Perfect. as long as SUVs etc. go through so much gas, prices will stay somewhat reasonable for the rest of us.

my Civic gets 40 MPG.
2001-10-10 12:40:27 PM  
oh yeah just get a corvette C5, its a low emissions vehicle and alot of fun, and F'UCK you to the excursion owners who a) drive up gas prices and kill the environment and b) drive sports cars out of america
2001-10-10 12:47:47 PM  
The part of Alaska that they want to drill is a wasteland. Its only value would be for drilling. It's unproductive land protected by unproductive people.
2001-10-10 12:52:28 PM  
American Sportscars = Oxymoron

The only real sportscars are European.
2001-10-10 12:55:57 PM  
And yes I know that I'm going to take a lot of shiat for that last comment.
But I don't care.
2001-10-10 12:58:03 PM  
Just because soccer moms and yuppie suburbanites don't use their SUV's off-road doesn't mean nobody does.
2001-10-10 01:01:57 PM  
BLUE OWL, wa wa wa wa do you want some cheeze with that wine? Sounds like a personal problem to me. Here is a tip, when you biatch and complain about stuff, half the people don't care and the other half think you deserve it. Hahahahahahahah.

Have a nice day.

p.s. probably see you at some candle light prayr vigile to protest the bombing in afganastan. Hahahahahahaha

Rember kids, all you have to do is live and die.
2001-10-10 01:08:50 PM  
The way I see it, there's no point in griping about anyone's reasons for buying a particular car. Someone buys a SUV because they think it looks cool? Big farkin' deal. That's why people buy sports cars, too. No one NEEDS to do 135 on a straight stretch of highway. I'm amused that people get so self-righteous about SUV's using a lot of gas, but they don't say jack about the Porsche/Ferrari/other midlife-crisis-mobile crowd. Have you checked gas mileage stats on one of those things lately?

Personally, I drive a minivan. I have 2 kids, I haul around a lot of computers and parts, and I fairly frequently have to drive back and forth from Florida to Maine with my family. My mileage is in the low 20's, but my vehicle is what's practical for my lifestyle.

Don't like it? Oh well. The last time I checked, the US is a free country. You're entitled to your opinion, but I'm also entitled to tell you that I think your opinion is stupid. I'll listen to the "hug the world" types when I meet one that's made the same informed, world-conscious decisions about every posession they own and every child they bear instead of only about one or two "pet issues".
2001-10-10 01:09:01 PM  
This is why I am not having childeren. It makes it alot easier to say fark off. My wife and I have 2 SUV's. We never car pool, I have many recreational[sp] toys, snowmachine, 4 wheeler, jetski. Since, I am going to stop my blood line with me, I get to use up all that resorces that my kids and their kids would have used. How is that for logic?
2001-10-10 01:12:03 PM  
Great line, "We're seeing now a voluntary stepping up of car manufacturers to increase the gas mileage and fuel efficiency of vehicles," Whitman said Tuesday.

Then I see in the story, Average fuel economy for the 491 cars is 23.9 mpg, a slight decrease from 24.2 mpg in 2001.

Either Witman is an idiot in thinking manufacturers are doing it voluntarily or Witman thinks Americans are idiots believing him.
2001-10-10 01:25:51 PM  
If you buy an SUV, look at your Warrenty, in it is says, you will void your warrenty if you take it off road.

They are such a piece of crap.

I never see them offroad, everybody here drives them a single driver commuter. That 4x4 action really comes in handy on that daily pavement grind.

Since everybody uses them as a car, they need to be regulated as cars. Everything else set asside, being made poorly, over priced, unreliable, expensive to repair and insure, and unsafe, they should have the same regulations imposed on them as cars.

The reason everybody likes them is only because they are market so you will like them. The reason they are marketed so heavily, they are cheaper to make, they have relaxed standards and regulations making it easier for manufacturers to make them and have a high yield return for profit because theprice is jacked up so high.
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