Peeing on churches is a road-trip favorite in my car...

Members of the life squad reportedly found

Wait, what?

A Drunk Catholic urinated on a church? Jesus loves you.

OK, I understand public urination and underage intoxication, but why disorderly conduct? Sounds like he was acting perfectly orderly.

Ron T Davenport: Members of the life squad reportedly found

Wait, what?

It's obvious. They're agents from the Ministry of peace.

Looks like it's spring break all year long.

Imagine that confession.

Confessor: "Bless Me Father, I urinated on a Methodist church".
Father George Carlin: "Watch the movie Dogma three times".

calbert: so no 'florida' tag

Wrong Miami.

Invisible sky whizzer.

Take THAT Protestants!

/German-Irish Catholic
//He probably just had to pee and was too drunk to notice

OMG, I really did LOL at that! Is being Catholic an excuse?? :-D

Boys! Yeesh!

Wherever you find 4 Catholics you'll find a fifth.

Reminds me of one night when I took a whiz on the UNC Greensboro School of Domestic Arts. Two undercover cops were watching me in a car almost dying with laughter. I was of course drunkenly oblivious. They asked me two questions.

1. Son, are you driving tonight?
No sirz, I ain'teven got a car here.
2. How can a little guy like you pee the Yellow River of China?
I can hold my liquor sirz. I hate dem durty bar bassroomsh. What with the pisshall over the floorz.

My friend was pretty much sober and laughing his a$$ off. The coppers said," Get him home and keep him at home. We got bigger fish to fry tonight."

What else would you expect from a Plebe?

bsharitt: calbert: so no 'florida' tag

Wrong Miami.

Is there a "right" Miami?

That'll show those Christians! way to stick-it-to-the-man and symbolize your theological differences!!

bump: That'll show those Christians! way to stick-it-to-the-man and symbolize your theological differences!!

LOL I know, right?

lo quilty: OMG, I really did LOL at that! Is being Catholic an excuse?? :-D

Boys! Yeesh!

I think it's more explanation than excuse.

he's our answer to Martin Luther!

Krymson Tyde: lo quilty: OMG, I really did LOL at that! Is being Catholic an excuse?? :-D

Boys! Yeesh!

I think it's more explanation than excuse.

If I could pee standing up, there are a few buildings I'd like to urinate on. Starting with traffic court.

ain't no hell hitter than a methodist hell!
catholic and happy.

DjangoStonereaver: And if he'd been whizzing on a mosque the GOP I and many others would give him the
Medal of Freedom....

I fixed this for you.

Finally, Rome responds to Martin Luther

lo quilty: Krymson Tyde: lo quilty: OMG, I really did LOL at that! Is being Catholic an excuse?? :-D

Boys! Yeesh!

I think it's more explanation than excuse.

If I could pee standing up, there are a few buildings I'd like to urinate on. Starting with traffic court.

What if you held it as long as possible, dropped trou and pointed your ass toward the wall? If you could produce a high velocity stream you could potentially bridge the gap.

In the interest of full disclosure I should inform you I have a penis so this is pure speculation on my part.

Does NOT approve

BKK: Reminds me of one night when I took a whiz on the UNC Greensboro School of Domestic Arts. Two undercover cops were watching me in a car almost dying with laughter. I was of course drunkenly oblivious. They asked me two questions.

1. Son, are you driving tonight?
No sirz, I ain'teven got a car here.
2. How can a little guy like you pee the Yellow River of China?
I can hold my liquor sirz. I hate dem durty bar bassroomsh. What with the pisshall over the floorz.

My friend was pretty much sober and laughing his a$$ off. The coppers said," Get him home and keep him at home. We got bigger fish to fry tonight."

and that is how something like this should be handled. but now they try to add a child endagerment charge, let you go maybe on a plead felony and a crazy fine plus court fees, making it so pretty much nobody will hire you or let you live in their neighborhood alive.

That would be an ecumenical matter

My family and I was visiting my uncle who for a while was dabbling in quakerism.

We went to their "firend house" or church because my parents, I assume, wanted to scrump and there wsn't much room at his place. After the service my brother and I need to go to the bathroom, we are waiting in line and get into a fight over who is next (I was around 9 and and he 12). Some guy runs over pulls us apart and says we can't fight here, it is the friendship hall and procedes to lecture us about non-violence. He pauses and I blurt, "it's okay, we are catholic" and jack my brother in the face. My uncle was asked not to bring us back.

Cormee: That would be an ecumenical matter

/approves

Growing up we used to be fed some awful stories about Protestants and how God hates them. If you ran around the local Protestant church 3 times backwards you'd see the Devil, there was the story about the Protest woman who dropped dead upon entering the Catholic church and my favourite (and the coolest story of all) Catholic v Protestant stories was how the devil came to stay with a Protestant landlord and his house has been haunted since http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loftus_Hall (new window)

/cool story braw

Cormee: Growing up we used to be fed some awful stories about Protestants and how God hates them. If you ran around the local Protestant church 3 times backwards you'd see the Devil, there was the story about the Protest woman who dropped dead upon entering the Catholic church and my favourite (and the coolest story of all) Catholic v Protestant stories was how the devil came to stay with a Protestant landlord and his house has been haunted since http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loftus_Hall (new window)

/cool story braw

Meanwhile the protestants were being told stories about us, the 'Mere Irish' being barely above animals. On the other hand, Mammy found a protestant woman in Dublin who kept her out of the Laundries.

habitual_masticator: Cormee: Growing up we used to be fed some awful stories about Protestants and how God hates them. If you ran around the local Protestant church 3 times backwards you'd see the Devil, there was the story about the Protest woman who dropped dead upon entering the Catholic church and my favourite (and the coolest story of all) Catholic v Protestant stories was how the devil came to stay with a Protestant landlord and his house has been haunted since http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loftus_Hall (new window)

/cool story braw

Meanwhile the protestants were being told stories about us, the 'Mere Irish' being barely above animals. On the other hand, Mammy found a protestant woman in Dublin who kept her out of the Laundries.

I friend of mine told me stories of how her protestant Sunday school teacher taught that black people don't have souls.

they keep trying to be a party school like OU but are not very good at it.

therealpope: DjangoStonereaver: And if he'd been whizzing on a mosque I and many others would give him the Medal of Freedom....

9-11 was really effective at terrorizing you people wasn't it.

First you give up your privacy to the Patriot Act and now, with this whole 'Ground Zero Mosque' crap, Freedom of Religion dies.

I suppose the only part of your constitution that you actually like is the 'Guns for Everyone' clause.

/Used to be 'live free or die'
//now it is 'I don't care what you do just keep the scary brown people away from me'

I think it's pretty unfair to charge him with public indecency when it was 1am local time, and in an alley. That's a bit over the top.

Krymson Tyde:

I friend of mine told me stories of how her protestant Sunday school teacher taught that black people don't have souls.

If it's any consolation, that is likely true...

/not in the way that ignorant teacher meant
//sadly, ignorance can be taught

Too drunk to walk the three extra blocks to the Catholic church?

calbert: so no 'florida' tag and we just have to read the whole police blotter to find the part that the headline refers to?

-1

[nelson-ha-ha.jpg]

Hey Moran, this is Miami University in Ohio. RTFA FAIL.

He was catholic? Oh, well that explains him being drunk...

Cormee: Growing up we used to be fed some awful stories about Protestants and how God hates them. If you ran around the local Protestant church 3 times backwards you'd see the Devil, there was the story about the Protest woman who dropped dead upon entering the Catholic church and my favourite (and the coolest story of all) Catholic v Protestant stories was how the devil came to stay with a Protestant landlord and his house has been haunted since http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loftus_Hall (new window)

/cool story braw

[quizzicaldog.jpg]

Did you go to an Irish Catholic church or something?

I don't think anyone in our church ever even mentioned any other religions. Definitely didn't have an anti-Protestant thing... almost everyone had ethnic/historical/family ties to Catholicism (Polish, Filipino, Italian and Vietmanese (nearly all the immigrants in our area were Catholic and fled) were the predominent groups) so it's not like the Protestants were gonna break the guilt I mean tradition that dragged us into church in the first place.

(shrug)

Do you know how fast you were going?

Officer, I have no statement to make.

Did you know you were peeing on a church?

Officer, I have no statement to make.

Where do you work?

Officer, I have no statement to make.

Where are you heading at this time of night?

Officer, I have no statement to make.

Police are NOT your friends. Don't say ANYTHING to them. EVER.

StreetlightInTheGhetto: Did you go to an Irish Catholic church or something?

Well yes, being a Catholic and living in Ireland... :)

I wasn't told any of that stuff by priests, it was all local legend.

I think he was lying. Clearly, he's Episcopalian.

paquerette: I think he was lying. Clearly, he's Episcopalian.

Just another word for 'lapsed Catholic'.

/that's what I've been told, anyway