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(ESPN)   Kentucky Derby winner War Emblem puts owners in $17 million quandry for refusing to hump dames   ( ) divider line 55
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5706 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jun 2003 at 4:25 PM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-06-11 12:42:47 PM  
Decorate his stall in cat food posters. That ought to get him in the mood.
2003-06-11 02:19:28 PM  
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
2003-06-11 02:28:40 PM  
I think he needs to be a stud at a different kind of farm.

[image from too old to be available]
2003-06-11 03:28:29 PM  
Hahahaha nice one Azmoviez.
2003-06-11 03:53:51 PM  
a little horse porn and the paddock will be full of ponies in no time.
2003-06-11 04:29:05 PM  
Maybe he wants to be the one with the whip this time?
2003-06-11 04:30:58 PM  
He's gay.
2003-06-11 04:31:04 PM  
perhaps he needs some horsie viagra. with perpetual wood it's 'hard' not to put it to good use.
2003-06-11 04:31:48 PM  

Maybe he lost his sexual appetite because he finally realized "Ew, I'm farking a horse !"

But then again, horse farking is never a problem in Kentucky.

2003-06-11 04:31:51 PM  

2003-06-11 04:32:28 PM  
Maybe the broodmares on that farm are not pretty enough, or too fat, or too old. Maybe War Emblem only likes fine young fillies.
2003-06-11 04:33:24 PM  
Just an FYI.... Do a GIS for "Fark" and look at image 10.

and DO NOT do a GIS for Gay Stud... You get weeners in your face.
2003-06-11 04:33:29 PM  
2003-06-11 04:34:52 PM  
IN sovi3t Rossia, dames hump Kentucky horses! What a country!

2003-06-11 04:34:59 PM  
"what if you put HER face, on HER body, WOAH YEAH!" - Homer

/Furious D
2003-06-11 04:35:36 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-06-11 04:36:35 PM  

Anyone that does a GIS for gay stud is by default gay.
You are now gay (even if you actually arent) due to the fact that for the rest of your life, millions of Farkers can honestly say they saw you admit to doing a GIS for "gay stud"
2003-06-11 04:37:01 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

"Oh, dear! Am I never to shag again?"

What? It says dames...
2003-06-11 04:38:07 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

2003-06-11 04:38:43 PM  
Only 7 kids?!? They ought to send Shawn Kemp or Marshall Faulk to talk to him about what it means to be a pro athlete.
2003-06-11 04:39:21 PM  
Maybe he's just not into chicks?

In the meantime, Shadai reports that War Emblem remains at the farm and is happy and healthy.

Let me translate: War Emblem is busy watching Will and Grace, listening to Barbra Streisand and show tunes, and frosting his hair.
2003-06-11 04:42:17 PM  
Haha, Farkers are awesome. One Big Gay Al picture and a "Ghey! uhuhuh". My first thought was also a South Park reference:

That horse is a gay homosexual.
2003-06-11 04:42:25 PM  
Fillies, I don't want no stinkin' fillies. BRING ON THE STUD!!
2003-06-11 04:43:08 PM  
"Those giraffes you sold me won't mate. They just walk around eating, and not mating. You sold me queer giraffes."
2003-06-11 04:44:12 PM  
"Nah uh, that's one ugly panda biatch. I wouldn't fark that panda biatch with a ten-foot pole, no way. You're lucky you're not a panda, 'cause that's the ugliest panda biatch there is."
-Robin Williams

Maybe they just got him fugly horse biatches.
2003-06-11 04:45:26 PM  
Do horses actually fark anymore? Too much of a chance of one of them getting hurt. I thought they jacked off the stud, froze the jizz and FedEx'ed to the mares.

One reason why I wouldn't want to be a FedEx guy.
2003-06-11 04:48:51 PM  
"Hung like a horse" surrenders.
2003-06-11 04:56:02 PM  
Dang. This far down and nobody has noted the fact that War Emblem is, in fact, the Belmont Stakes winner and not the Kentucky Derby winner. Pity that...
2003-06-11 05:03:52 PM  
No, War Emblem won the Derby and the Preakness but lost the Belmont.
2003-06-11 05:04:01 PM  

Dang. This far down and you didn't read the article. In fact War Emblem was the 2002 Kentucky Derby Winner. Pity that...
2003-06-11 05:04:13 PM  
Actually DrBenway, War Emblem won the Kentucky Derby AND Preakness last year, and then lost the Belmont when he stumbled out of the gate.
2003-06-11 05:05:01 PM  
Sarava won the Belmont that year
2003-06-11 05:11:49 PM  
Jeez, what is this horse thinking? JUST DO IT!!!!!!!
2003-06-11 05:12:04 PM  
I always heard that someone paid millions to put Secretariat to stud and found out that he was a "reticent breeder" as well. Maybe all that fast running does something to their little swimmers, I dunno.
2003-06-11 05:14:39 PM  
The comedian man-whore Eddie Griffin could help out here. He has had five children, each with a different mother. Where do you go for Thanksgiving in that family?
2003-06-11 05:17:06 PM  
Switch_tech_guy I'd personally rather not be the "horse-jacker-offer" guy!
2003-06-11 05:19:18 PM  
Switch tech guy: Throughbred racing forbids artificial insemination. Stud on mare only.
2003-06-11 05:21:40 PM  
Weemill: on a related note, try a GIS for "vagina" (NSFW) first pic...

War Emblem was a Derby/Preakness winner, just like Funny Cide.
He also won at Monmouth Park later in that season, before being sent off to stud.
2003-06-11 05:28:19 PM  
It's like I always say. All the good horses are either married or gay.
2003-06-11 05:28:19 PM  
Maybe he needs some hot horse porn to get him going.
2003-06-11 05:33:11 PM  
War Emblem/Empire Maker... sorry, kids. Got them confused. I can't think straight since the Bid died.

Maybe he needs some hot horse porn to get him going.

Macman, that's not the can of worms you want to be opening in a Fark thread, now is it?
2003-06-11 05:36:00 PM  
He's probably staying up all night playing Counter-Strike and drinking Mountain Dew. Oh wait, that's my brother's problem.
2003-06-11 05:40:23 PM  

Dang. This far down...

BenGay, Benway... ohhhh, I get it! That is SOOOOOOO clever! Why, that's the FIRST TIME EVER that anyone's done that! How exceptionally original and imaginative you are. Such a card.
2003-06-11 05:49:30 PM  

True, very true. I can see it now...

GIS for "Hot horse porn" reveals ...
2003-06-11 05:51:03 PM  
With this latest bit of news on the prices for have sex with females, I am now availing my stud services for all farkettes.

$16m asking price is negotiable.
2003-06-11 05:58:10 PM  

the mind reels...
2003-06-11 05:58:59 PM  
Macman37 I think that's his problem. He's been watching too many horse-on-girl videos. I mean, he is in a Japanese stable, right?
2003-06-11 06:01:59 PM  
Dotderf: Stud on mare only.

But what if she only cums if she's on top?
2003-06-11 06:11:00 PM  
(in Cartman's voice) "Ha - Fag !!"
2003-06-11 07:11:31 PM  

Since it hasn't been said:

[image from too old to be available]

Courtesy of ebaum
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