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(Chicago Breaking News)   Asian carp found in Lake Michigan may have been a plant. Funny, you'd think the DNR would know the difference between a plant and a fish   (chicagobreakingnews.com) divider line 63
    More: Followup, Lake Michigan, Asian carps, Department of Natural Resources, Chicago's South Side, Forest Service, Southern Illinois, Great Lakes, Asian  
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6158 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Aug 2010 at 7:30 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-08-05 04:52:19 PM  
Booooooo
 
2010-08-05 05:04:04 PM  
But specialists at Southern Illinois University Carbondale say tests and analysis suggest the 3-foot-long bighead may have spent nearly all its life above the barrier and could have been planted by humans.

So it swimming through within the last week is ruled out?

I think not.
 
2010-08-05 05:17:50 PM  
Asian provocateur?
 
2010-08-05 06:38:37 PM  
I must be tired. I actually lol'd.
 
2010-08-05 06:51:46 PM  
Load of carp.
 
2010-08-05 07:31:49 PM  
Surely you can't be serious?
 
2010-08-05 07:34:37 PM  
redundantman
Surely you can't be serious?

I am serious. And don't call me Shirley.

"A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a fruit."
 
2010-08-05 07:36:57 PM  
Sometimes called "testicle shredders"

cogito.faii.net

You can see the burning hate in their eyes.

www.freakingnews.com
 
2010-08-05 07:37:49 PM  
I saw that one carp climb a 10 foot wall to catch a baseball. And you think some little fence is going to keep them out of the lake.
 
2010-08-05 07:39:31 PM  
Mrs. White: Are you a cop?
Mr. Green: No, I'm a plant.
Miss Scarlet: A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a fruit.
Mr. Green: Very funny.
 
2010-08-05 07:40:09 PM  
Bondith: "A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a fruit."

Very funny.
 
2010-08-05 07:40:12 PM  
Misread that as DNC and was about to state: "No surprise."
 
2010-08-05 07:43:57 PM  
whammer: You can see the burning hate in their eyes.

Haven't seen an expression like that since my last visit to a tea party.
 
2010-08-05 07:45:22 PM  
A plant? This has to be Obama's fault.
 
2010-08-05 07:47:10 PM  
Farking Asians.
 
2010-08-05 07:55:39 PM  
Bucky Katt: A plant? This has to be Obama's fault.

plants are always liberal
 
2010-08-05 07:57:52 PM  
Ignominiousbob: Haven't seen an expression like that since my last visit to a tea party.

So why is a raven like a writing desk?

/ohh, THAT kind of tea party
//they only make slightly more sense
 
2010-08-05 08:14:48 PM  
Foaming: I saw that one carp climb a 10 foot wall to catch a baseball. And you think some little fence is going to keep them out of the lake.

Well, he didn't make it over the fence.
 
2010-08-05 08:23:06 PM  
Put some rhinoceroses in Lake Michigan; rhinoceroses hate asian carp.
 
2010-08-05 08:33:45 PM  
They were somewhat lost, disoriented you might say.
 
2010-08-05 08:38:19 PM  
What Asian crap might look like
farm1.static.flickr.com
 
2010-08-05 08:38:24 PM  
Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'
 
2010-08-05 08:39:14 PM  
Yaxe: Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'


Yup. But if you're smart you ship them to China by the ton.
 
2010-08-05 08:43:05 PM  
krelborne: Asian provocateur?

+1.

But seriously, what kind of farkstick is deliberately moving these things around?
 
2010-08-05 08:43:56 PM  
danaganooc: Yaxe: Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'

Yup. But if you're smart you ship them to China by the ton.


Oh, that kind of farkstick...
 
2010-08-05 08:43:56 PM  
You ever seen an Asian carp drive a camry? Better to leave them in the lake if you ask me.
 
2010-08-05 08:45:33 PM  
Sounds more like a red herring.
 
2010-08-05 08:46:18 PM  
Thenixon: danaganooc: Yaxe: Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'

Yup. But if you're smart you ship them to China by the ton.

Oh, that kind of farkstick...


?
 
2010-08-05 08:47:54 PM  
Maybe the little guy took notes from these farkers:
http://www.frequency.com/video/flying-fish/51124
 
2010-08-05 08:48:48 PM  
sforce
Bondith: "A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a fruit."

Very funny.


FBI That phone call from J. Edgar Hoover was for me. I told you I didn't do it.

/was in a stage adaptation of Clue in undergrad
//it's not easy being Green
 
2010-08-05 08:50:33 PM  
danaganooc: Thenixon: danaganooc: Yaxe: Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'

Yup. But if you're smart you ship them to China by the ton.

Oh, that kind of farkstick...

?


Not calling you farkstick, sorry if that was unclear. But given the market for these fish in China, there may well be some ass who doesn't care about the Great Lakes sportfishing industry or ecosystem, and sees a quick payout coming if they're put into the lakes. I'm guessing it would be easier to harvest them there.
 
2010-08-05 08:50:34 PM  
danaganooc: Thenixon: danaganooc: Yaxe: Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'

Yup. But if you're smart you ship them to China by the ton.

Oh, that kind of farkstick...

?


He means someone who is looking to profit.
 
2010-08-05 08:53:59 PM  
..."The next morning, we saw our first Asian Carp.. 30-pounder, you know how you can tell, Chief? You look at the freaking scale, because the freaking fish jumps into the damn boat and knocks your ass unconscious, and you weigh it when you come to..."


These motherfarking fish will destroy the Great Lakes fishery and ecosystem if they get established.
I say, if you can't close the locks due to shipping and sanitary needs, and the electric and bubble fences aren't enough, then you can at least put a powerful neutron emitter in the locks, that will pre-cook any fish that tries to cross. The boats won't be affected, and you can have the crews get off at the lock entrance and tow the empty boats thru. Barge traffic won't be affected.
 
2010-08-05 09:04:21 PM  
Thenixon: danaganooc: Thenixon: danaganooc: Yaxe: Can you eat an Asian carp?

/wonderin'

Yup. But if you're smart you ship them to China by the ton.

Oh, that kind of farkstick...

?

Not calling you farkstick, sorry if that was unclear. But given the market for these fish in China, there may well be some ass who doesn't care about the Great Lakes sportfishing industry or ecosystem, and sees a quick payout coming if they're put into the lakes. I'm guessing it would be easier to harvest them there.


The things are a major threat to the indigenous species, it's a good deal for everyone to ship them away to someplace that has a market for them.
 
2010-08-05 09:05:33 PM  
murfinsandburglars.files.wordpress.com

What a plant might look like.
 
2010-08-05 09:12:25 PM  
www.chicagonow.com

we. are. farked.
 
2010-08-05 09:28:46 PM  
Thenixon: Not calling you farkstick, sorry if that was unclear. But given the market for these fish in China, there may well be some ass who doesn't care about the Great Lakes sportfishing industry or ecosystem, and sees a quick payout coming if they're put into the lakes. I'm guessing it would be easier to harvest them there.

That's the thing... WHY BOTHER? You take out a mega-sized jon boat, and fly your ass back and forth down some of the rivers in the mid-west. You don't need a hook, you just need nets, and an ability to quickly duck out of the way of flying fish. There's no need, really, for anyone to consider planting these fish in Lake Michigan, when they're already a pest (and could probably be harvested, commercially, for "free" by government standards) in so many areas.

I just don't get why this isn't being done on a larger scale... hell, US government, want to pay back some of that debt to China? Place barges along all of these infested rivers, and run some speedboats around the barges (like 1960s Batman, when they're trying to bring up the submarine), and watch them fill with fish!
 
2010-08-05 09:34:31 PM  
Predictable headline is predictable. Also made me laugh. Predictable headline gets +1.
 
2010-08-05 09:42:29 PM  
JonnyBGoode: What a plant might look like.

CLUE THREAD!
 
2010-08-05 09:44:16 PM  
You won't be able to sell these in China - China protects it's workers with tariffs. Tyson chicken feet anyone?

http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE6142GN20100205
 
2010-08-05 09:46:33 PM  
really,these fish need to be nuked from orbit.
they are a major PIA. DO WHAT WE HAVE TO DO TO ERADICATE THE SPECIES!
we dont need them nor want them. they are making recreational boating really dangerous. their value as food is negligent.
 
2010-08-05 09:55:06 PM  
lh6.ggpht.com

Boating consequences will never be the same.
 
2010-08-05 10:07:02 PM  
dbrunker: What Asian crap might look like
[picture of stickers]


Is it bad that I *really* want one of those? (the stickers, not actual crap)

Could have soooo much fun with those.
 
2010-08-05 10:09:55 PM  
Dwight_Yeast: JonnyBGoode: What a plant might look like.

CLUE THREAD!


There are flames... flames.... on the side of my head....

2.bp.blogspot.com


/hawt linked
 
2010-08-05 10:12:04 PM  
you'd think the DNR would know the difference between a plant and a fish

Nope... not in this century.
 
2010-08-05 10:14:45 PM  
You'd think you could tell the difference between the DNR and a plant, but you can't.
 
BBH
2010-08-05 10:15:07 PM  
The DNR cannot tell anything after Blago gutted their budget.

Yes, IL is trying to capture the carp and send them to Asia for food.

When will Arkansas, I believe, be held responsible for allowing these carp to get into their waterways from a fish farm?
 
2010-08-05 10:16:41 PM  
Thenixon
But given the market for these fish in China, there may well be some ass who doesn't care about the Great Lakes sportfishing industry or ecosystem, and sees a quick payout coming if they're put into the lakes.

They should be charged with reckless ecological endangerment, false arrest, and wrongful imprisonment, and obstructing an officer in the course of his duty... and MURDER!
 
2010-08-05 10:38:21 PM  
Anderrhea: Booooooo

Yeeeaaa!
 
2010-08-05 10:43:44 PM  
Any Pie Left: ..."The next morning, we saw our first Asian Carp.. 30-pounder, you know how you can tell, Chief? You look at the freaking scale, because the freaking fish jumps into the damn boat and knocks your ass unconscious, and you weigh it when you come to..."


These motherfarking fish will destroy the Great Lakes fishery and ecosystem if they get established.
I say, if you can't close the locks due to shipping and sanitary needs, and the electric and bubble fences aren't enough, then you can at least put a powerful neutron emitter in the locks, that will pre-cook any fish that tries to cross. The boats won't be affected, and you can have the crews get off at the lock entrance and tow the empty boats thru. Barge traffic won't be affected.


Nuke 'em. It's the only way to be sure.
 
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