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(Some Guy) Amusing Local pastor, who is definitely not gay, is upset about "pornographic" men's underwear packaging. Again, not gay   (cullmantimes.com) divider line 135
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12251 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jul 2010 at 2:23 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



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2010-07-29 10:23:52 AM
Come on, that's the only reason that I like shopping. Those packages are amazing. Lovely, lovely packaging.
 
2010-07-29 10:51:35 AM
Why would I want to buy the underwear until I know how it will look against my rock hard abs?
 
2010-07-29 11:02:10 AM
I didnt know Wal-Mart sold International Male (new window) (nsfw)
 
2010-07-29 11:39:51 AM
I swear, one of the Admins loves to follow me around and greenlight threads in which I've said something a bit racy.

But, back to the topic on hand, I'm really liking the "Play" brand boxes, followed up by the always nice 2xist and Calvin boxes.
 
2010-07-29 11:58:35 AM
So what brand?! I might have to try some out.

"Again, not gay" - totally heard that in Lisa Simpson's voice.
 
2010-07-29 12:09:55 PM
How can you write an article about supposedly "pornographic" packaging, and not include a picture so those of us who don't see porn everywhere we look, and don't throw fits over things like underwear packaging, can know what this guy was making a stink about, then point and laugh.
 
2010-07-29 12:52:50 PM
Since when do pastors wear underwear?
 
2010-07-29 01:06:04 PM
Godscrack: Since when do pastors wear underwear?

JC was a free-baller.
 
2010-07-29 01:18:41 PM
Barbigazi: Godscrack: Since when do pastors wear underwear?

JC was a free-baller.


Yeah that's how we all used to roll back in the day.

/Knew him? shiat! Nubian owes me twelve bucks.
 
2010-07-29 01:23:01 PM
Sort of related topic, do you think anybody got a look at Jesus's wang while he was on the cross?

I think given the opportunity I'd have peeked
 
2010-07-29 01:27:24 PM
Bukharin: I didnt know Wal-Mart sold International Male (new window) (nsfw)

OK, so WTF is a "string enchancer"?

/lots of nice eye candy in that link though, thanks...
 
2010-07-29 01:40:09 PM
Barbigazi: Sort of related topic, do you think anybody got a look at Jesus's wang while he was on the cross?

I think given the opportunity I'd have peeked


...

Yeah, if you want to farking die from the beam of holy light. Haven't you seen Raiders of the Lost Ark?
 
2010-07-29 01:43:00 PM
ignite ice: Barbigazi: Sort of related topic, do you think anybody got a look at Jesus's wang while he was on the cross?

I think given the opportunity I'd have peeked

...

Yeah, if you want to farking die from the beam of holy light. Haven't you seen Raiders of the Lost Ark?


You mean that was his penis in the box? This will set Christianity on it's ear!
 
2010-07-29 01:45:12 PM
Boren said he wanted to thank Valentine and Cullman County Sheriff Tyler Roden for their assistance in the matter.

Really? They had to get the Sheriff involved?
 
2010-07-29 02:04:57 PM
Barbigazi: You mean that was his penis in the box? This will set Christianity on it's ear!

No! Jesus was in the Ark! Kind of like a magic lamp with a genie inside.
 
2010-07-29 02:14:29 PM
ignite ice: Barbigazi: You mean that was his penis in the box? This will set Christianity on it's ear!

No! Jesus was in the Ark! Kind of like a magic lamp with a genie inside.


Yeah, but those people didn't get wishes. Unless they wished to melt...hmmm.
 
2010-07-29 02:25:08 PM
Why, Just look at that bulge..er..package.. oops! I mean packaging.. that's it.
 
2010-07-29 02:25:50 PM
Barbigazi: Yeah, but those people didn't get wishes. Unless they wished to melt...hmmm.

Oh, good point. Well, maybe they didn't really "melt." Maybe that was actually the rapture, and they were ascending to Heaven. They were Nazis after all, and Nazis were Christians.
 
2010-07-29 02:27:47 PM
Many creatures wave genitals as a challenge. This may not be what you'd want in your advertisement.
 
2010-07-29 02:28:05 PM
"On a few of the packages they were very pornographic in the way they were dressed, in skimpy underwear..."

That means, pastor, that you were shopping for "skimpy" underwear.

Perv.
 
2010-07-29 02:28:26 PM
Barbigazi: Sort of related topic, do you think anybody got a look at Jesus's wang while he was on the cross?

I think given the opportunity I'd have peeked


This gave me an idea for a good band name.

Penis of Jesus (or maybe just Jesus Penis)
 
2010-07-29 02:28:48 PM
ignite ice: Barbigazi: Yeah, but those people didn't get wishes. Unless they wished to melt...hmmm.

Oh, good point. Well, maybe they didn't really "melt." Maybe that was actually the rapture, and they were ascending to Heaven. They were Nazis after all, and Nazis were Christians.


Oh wow, the rapture is going to be horrifying.
 
2010-07-29 02:29:02 PM
Closet homosexuals pay attention. When the guys who don't no they're closeted give themselves away by these little slipups ( imagine to him it IS porno, he definitely popped wood when he saw them) you can learn something from his pain.
 
2010-07-29 02:29:16 PM
Kurmudgeon: Many creatures wave genitals as a challenge.

How else do you hail a cab?
 
2010-07-29 02:29:22 PM
Al Pastor tacos are not gay, they are delicious!
 
2010-07-29 02:29:39 PM
He's upset because he wants the package on the package, but unfortunately "thou shalt not covet thy underwear model" - commandment 11.
 
2010-07-29 02:29:44 PM
Tried to submit on Monday.

"Already been submitted".

/with a better headline.
//mine was less troll-y.
 
2010-07-29 02:30:57 PM
"I took the packaging from the shelf, brought it into the men's restroom and masturbated furiously for ten minutes, culminating in an earth-shattering orgasm that coated the entire stall with semen. That's what led me to believe the picture was pornographic."
 
2010-07-29 02:31:23 PM
He's just trying to help, and by help I mean shield society from the perversion which is wearing underwear. Do you see any other of God's creatures wearing underwear!

/Go Comando
 
2010-07-29 02:31:53 PM
The ownage on the Daily Show last night along this theme was pretty awesome.
 
2010-07-29 02:32:20 PM
"On a few of the packages they were very pornographic in the way they were dressed, in skimpy underwear"

Imagine that, trying to sell underwear using a picture of a man selling underwear. You know, it's just crazy enough to work!

/Pastor's a closet case
//NTTAWW being gay
///don't fight it, feel it
 
2010-07-29 02:32:40 PM
DNRTFA - Do you mean packaging? Or do you mean "packaging"? Or is the "packaging" on the packaging?

/nttawwt
 
2010-07-29 02:33:16 PM
Ahem, "a picture of a man wearing underwear", of course.
 
2010-07-29 02:33:36 PM
He's getting all hot and bothered over their packages?
 
2010-07-29 02:33:46 PM
Aren't the models wearing the type that's in the package?

And aren't all those models packing a semi in their undies? I mean, really...

/yes, I buy men's undies. For the husband. Sometimes.
 
2010-07-29 02:34:03 PM
That would make some freaky UPS man on pastor gay porn.
/what can brown do for you
//all roads lead to the Vatican
///the possibilities are endless
 
2010-07-29 02:34:20 PM
This thread is useless without cocks pics of cocks

/I'm not gaaaaayyyyy
 
2010-07-29 02:34:20 PM
Religious people are so annoying.
 
2010-07-29 02:34:59 PM
so bascially folks like this pastor and some mullahs in Allahkistan are like minded folks on the same side of a different coin.

Pornographic my @$$. Perhaps he need to pick up a copy of the dictionary. Pornography depict acts of sexual nature. Not merely a person in skimpy outfit.
 
2010-07-29 02:35:09 PM
Barakku: He's getting all hot and bothered over their packages?

Let's just say... it's hard for him to cum to terms with the packaging...
 
2010-07-29 02:36:14 PM
I want to see the packaging in question before making any judgment.
 
2010-07-29 02:37:52 PM
He takes a wide stance on these issues.
 
2010-07-29 02:38:06 PM
Barbigazi: Oh wow, the rapture is going to be horrifying.

Just close your eyes.
 
2010-07-29 02:38:22 PM
I demand to see said "pornographic" pictures. For research, of course.

Also, his name is Boren? More like Pastor Boner to me.
 
2010-07-29 02:39:01 PM
TTIWWOP
NTTAWWT
 
2010-07-29 02:39:19 PM
I would think that for the average walmart customer that the packaging would be a problem

there's no way in hell they would like that, nor would they even be able to see their package, so i would consider it dishonest advertising
 
2010-07-29 02:39:40 PM
serpent_sky: and not include a picture so those of us who don't see porn everywhere we look,

img.metro.co.uk

What porn may look like.
 
2010-07-29 02:41:33 PM
Yes, the sight of those men offended him.

The complaining christer may have felt uncomfortable at the sight of barely-dressed men. The sight of said men may awakened deep-seated feelings of tenderly admiring what barely-nude flesh of men had on him.

He wished deep down to tenderly caress that man from long ago and now that he is a religious man he has to avoid to feelings of lust toward other men.
 
2010-07-29 02:42:01 PM
Three Crooked Squirrels: Boren said he wanted to thank Valentine and Cullman County Sheriff Tyler Roden for their assistance in the matter.

Really? They had to get the Sheriff involved?


One of my first thoughts too - I'm pretty sure the Sheriff is getting paid $40/hr or more to "assist" in something that really does not need to be resolved with taxpayer money.

/ Bbbbut Socialism... unless the evil gubment is helping solve the mystery of the pornographic Walmart briefs
 
2010-07-29 02:42:11 PM
ultraholland: What porn may look like.

That's clearly an advertisement for ladies undergarments, cars, or possibly carpooling.

I need more pics to determine which.
 
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