Sarah Palin RealDoll?

Pope needs money to pay off the molested kids.

LancePGH: I am holding out for a better deal on woot.

I got eternal salvation, some post-its, an apple and the whore of Babylon in my Bag-o-crap

"2 pope events in the UK"? What, like cage fights? Iiiiiiin the left corner: Pope Benedict the sixteenth, with 2000 years of darkness, superstition and evil under his belt. And in the riiiiiiiiight corner, Shenouda the 3rd, hailing from beautiful Alexandria in Egypt...

abb3w: FTA: He cited the costs of everything from renting stadiums to portable toilets to hotels for Vatican officials and insurance.

Wait, the Catholic Church isn't rich enough to be able to self-insure?

Hell, I thought that was the point of the collection plate.

I remember going to church and seeing my dad drop $20 bucks every week.

Or triple my money back?

That's $39 more than mine was.

That's just the down payment. You'll be paying 10% of your weekly income too.

I'll bet the Pope won't give you triple your money back if you are not salvationized.

Lanny Budd beat me to it. Missed it by that much.

I only had to pay $20 for my salvation. Bought it years ago.

The Vatican disgusted me when I was there. Hell, you even had to "donate" to light an electric candle.

I didn't even bother to go look at Michelangelo's work, I just wanted to get away from the stink of hypocrisy.

what can i get for 25?


"can u pour it in my hand for fiddy cents"

Holy father, what's a blowjob?

$39, same as in town.

Kar98: "2 pope events in the UK"? What, like cage fights? Iiiiiiin the left corner: Pope Benedict the sixteenth, with 2000 years of darkness, superstition and evil under his belt. And in the riiiiiiiiight corner, Shenouda the 3rd, hailing from beautiful Alexandria in Egypt...

(deep, loud, echoing obnoxious voice)
COMING SOON TO A STADIUMNEARYOU! 2 POPE MOTO-CROSSSSSSSS. WITH WORLD FAMOUS DEMOLITION WITH MONNNNSTER TRUUUUUUUCKS. $39 GETS YOU IN THE DOOR TO THE ULLLLLTIMATE THRILL MAAAAACHINES. COME FOR CARRRRRRNAGE, STAY FOR SALVAAAAAATIONNNNNNN!

Cthulhu will take your soul for free.

How's that plan to arrest him once on UK soil going? Isn't Hitchens and some others trying to get his ass thrown in jail for abuse crimes?

Genju: COMING SOON TO A STADIUMNEARYOU! 2 POPE MOTO-CROSSSSSSSS. WITH WORLD FAMOUS DEMOLITION WITH MONNNNSTER TRUUUUUUUCKS. $39 GETS YOU IN THE DOOR TO THE ULLLLLTIMATE THRILL MAAAAACHINES. COME FOR CARRRRRRNAGE, STAY FOR SALVAAAAAATIONNNNNNN!

LOL. It also needs a "SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAAAAAAAAY!!!!" and a "YOU'LL PAY FOR THE WHOLE SEAT, BUT YOU'LL ONLY NEED THE EDGEEEEEEEEEEE!" thrown in.

Hello fans this is Steve Stone, fans, you wanna be here Tuesday night when the Braves meet the Calvary Cubs, it's gonna be Nabisco Community Wafer Day here at the ballpark, all fans 33 and under get a free Eucharist signed by the savior himself, Nabisco Community Wafers go down smooth,won't stick to the roof of your mouth like those cheap imitation Sacraments, sure, they cost a little more, but when it comes to your internal salvation, isn't it worth that extra buck in the collection plate? Remember fans, next time you go to the rail for that body and blood, ask for the Host With The Most, ask for Nabisco!

Now, back to the thread!

FTFA: Benedict's four-day visit to England and Scotland has been controversial almost from the start

Why not Ireland, isn't that where all the Catholics hang out?

abb3w: FTA: He cited the costs of everything from renting stadiums to portable toilets to hotels for Vatican officials and insurance.

Wait, the Catholic Church isn't rich enough to be able to self-insure?

nope, they need the money to build more golden staffs and prada shoes

taking a vow of poverty ain't easy to them....

read the article and im guessing the entrance fee is to cover the lawsuits.


i said entrance...giggidy

What's the big deal? It's a lot cheaper than Scientology. Do you people not believe in the free market or something?

abb3w: FTA: He cited the costs of everything from renting stadiums to portable toilets to hotels for Vatican officials and insurance.

Wait, the Catholic Church isn't rich enough to be able to self-insure?

Wait, god's holy representative on Earth *needs* insurance?

...Also, will Bishop Truck-a-saurus be appearing with the Pope? For $39, I definitely expect to see a giant metal car-crushing, fire breathing, vaguely saurian looking creature in a bishop's hat.

je$u$ $ave$

Just pick up the receiver

It would be nice if people would take that 39 dollars and donate it instead to help feed the starving children of people too terrified by the church's whole "use birth control and burn in hell!" stance to limit the size of their families. In many third world countries, where the church still has huge amounts of power (people are too poor and ignorant to realize it's all a great big crock) the Vatican still tells them that using condoms to prevent AIDS and babies they can't afford to feed is a terrible sin. And so, since it's human to have sex, they end up diseased and with starving children. Surely, if there's a god at all, it would approve of using 39 bucks to feed a starving baby more than it would to use 39 bucks to catch a glimpse of some lying, deluded, pedophile-enabling old man who runs around in a costly gown, dripping with gold, while his "flock" die in the gutter from preventable diseases.

Genju: Kar98: "2 pope events in the UK"? What, like cage fights? Iiiiiiin the left corner: Pope Benedict the sixteenth, with 2000 years of darkness, superstition and evil under his belt. And in the riiiiiiiiight corner, Shenouda the 3rd, hailing from beautiful Alexandria in Egypt...

(deep, loud, echoing obnoxious voice)
COMING SOON TO A STADIUMNEARYOU! 2 POPE MOTO-CROSSSSSSSS. WITH WORLD FAMOUS DEMOLITION WITH MONNNNSTER TRUUUUUUUCKS. $39 GETS YOU IN THE DOOR TO THE ULLLLLTIMATE THRILL MAAAAACHINES. COME FOR CARRRRRRNAGE, STAY FOR SALVAAAAAATIONNNNNNN!

YOU PAY FOR THE WHOLE SEAT, BUT YOU'LL ONLY NEED THE EEEEDGE!

I hope to god that this is a sign that the church has felt - at least in a tiny part - some financial pain from the myriad of kiddie-touching lawsuits in the past decade.

Act now, and we'll throw in one vat of Holy Water. This Holy water works great on stains, and when paired with Oxy-Clean, no stain is safe from eternal damnation.

BUY NOW!!!!

difrancopsycho: je$u$ $ave$

Moses invests.

Well SOMEBODY'S gotta pay for all those child molester priests and those who cover up those crimes...

You have to!
You have to!
You have to!
You have to!
BUY RIGHT NOW!!!

I miss Sinead.

If they start charging instead of donations we can tax them, right?
No longer a non-profit with donations only.

Come on Catholicism. Permanent salvation doesn't make you any money. Clearly the best business model would provide temporary salvation for a recurring fee. $39 / month sounds more like it. And for an extra $10 / month, you can upgrade your room in heaven to the Deluxe with a balcony and mini-bar.

Gold chalices and condoms don't just grow on trees, subby

Lanny Budd: I'll bet the Pope won't give you triple your money back if you are not salvationized.

J.R. "Bob" Dobbs for the win!

Eternal salvation, or TRIPLE your money back!

www.subgenius.com

Newman!

Sounds like a bargain. Is there a family rate?

The last time they were in portugal, not long ago, they requested thousands to pray , the lisbon city officials refused to pay , the oporto city paid for it.
They managed to find private investors to pay for over 300 thousand euros just for preparations, signs , publicity and a place for him to pray on.


Working on lisbon it was incredible seeing them moving the hobos out of the places where the pope was going to preach. All that money should have been put forward to help others, not to celebrate the giant PR machine that those persons made up to use religion as if it was a company they are all shareholders of.

Could I just buy my salvation month to month? I'm a little short on cash.

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Genju: COMING SOON TO A STADIUMNEARYOU! 2 POPE MOTO-CROSSSSSSSS. WITH WORLD FAMOUS DEMOLITION WITH MONNNNSTER TRUUUUUUUCKS. $39 GETS YOU IN THE DOOR TO THE ULLLLLTIMATE THRILL MAAAAACHINES. COME FOR CARRRRRRNAGE, STAY FOR SALVAAAAAATIONNNNNNN!

LOL. It also needs a "SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAAAAAAAAY!!!!" and a "YOU'LL PAY FOR THE WHOLE SEAT, BUT YOU'LL ONLY NEED THE EDGEEEEEEEEEEE!" thrown in.

and "KID SEATS ARE JUST FIVE BUCKS!!!!"