Crown_of_Shoes *eggroll*

*lolroll*

Poowaddins: Franklin Delano Bluth:
This. Though when I want to splurge I'll get myself a dozen duck eggs instead for a buck more. The yolks are gigantic and farking delicious.

djh0101010: Oh man, I'd KILL right now for a dozen duck eggs. Best Breakfast Ever.

I wish you guys lived closer, I've got a pet duck and she lays 2-3 eggs a day, I'm not kidding. She sleeps in a shaving-filled cat litter box in the garage, and every day I collect 2-3 eggs. So unless my egg thief dog is depositing eggs in the box...they have to come from her.

They are pretty good, the yolk is much sweeter I think. But I can't eat many eggs, got a slight egg allergy. If ya lived closer, I'd give you dozens of free duck eggs. No one around here will buy them. When you list them, they just act like I'm trying to sell alien eggs or something.

Personally, turkey eggs are awesome. About 2-3 chicken eggs and taste exactly the same. Guinea eggs are pretty tasty too, but mostly yolk and damn hard to crack. Pigeon eggs aren't bad either, they're good pickled as finger food.

Turkey egg on the left, one of my free-range hens on the right:

That's awesome. I seriously need to look into raising some birds of some sort. I live on a farm that is seriously under-utilized, so we have the space and pastures for them.

brainiac-dumdum: djh0101010 Um, so, seriously, I don't really care about sustainable or cruel, I just like eggs that taste like eggs. So maybe "or" rather than "and" for your statement.

seriously?

*eyeroll*

Yeah, seriously. Let me guess, you go out and masturbate your chickens to make them feel better, on a daily basis or something?

I've had chickens. I bought a farmhouse with a coop with 14 of the stupid farkers in it, that the previous owners dumped on me as MY problem. Evil, stupid farking reptiles. Killing them all was the best day of my involvement with them. Yay for yummy eggs, but, for a buck or three a dozen, and not having to deal with their stupid evil chicken brains, I'm happy to farm it out to someone who doesn't loathe their stupidity and behaviours.

I took great pleasure in chopping the head off the brood hen who drew blood on me each time I collected eggs. She was FIRST.

So, care to explain "EYEROLL" in some sort of actually meaningful way, or do you just want to back off and admit that I just might know what the fark I'm talking about on the topic?

/stupid farking birds.
//best day of owning that place was the chicken killing party after work.
///including the one bird with the 1/4 stick of dynamite taped to it. cluck cluck cluck boom splatter.
////that one, we got no usable meat from, oh darn.
//luckily it was dumb enough to run into the woods rather than towards the buildings. The chunks, however, flew in so many directions.

Mock26: I buy free range eggs at my local farmer's market. I like the fact that my money is supporting a local farmer. I also like that the eggs are fresher. Sometimes they were laid that very day.


Something most Farkers only wish they could say.

djh0101010: Defiance_: Fine Varmint: Defiance_: TheCynic: I prefer the food that induces the most fear in the livestock it is derived from.

Chickens are too dumb to be afraid. They just get indignant.

Chickens are only as smart as the people around them.

So you never met any smart chickens?

Hmm.

The only people I've seen trying to teach chickens to count have been really dumb so... I win?

So about a dozen years ago, I bought a farmhouse, complete with 14 chickens, from a pair of utter morons. He was an idiot, she was a raving alcoholic. And those are their best points.

11 of the 14 chickens were dumb enough to be annoying in their chicken-like ways but harmless enough. The alpha-rooster, the brood hen, and another useless female, were annoying enough to be invited to special hatchet parties in their honor.

The other 11 hung around for a few months until it started getting cold and the hens didn't produce so much. I was working third shift at the time, and invited all of my cow-orkers to come out and play "let's kill chickens". By noon, the coop was empty, and the idiot who showed up in white pants looked like the prime suspect in so many wanted posters. But the chickens were gone, my liquor cabinet and beer coolers were empty, and a splendid time was guaranteed for all.

I may have had a point when I started this. I should go to bed now.

cow-orker. heh.
/cow-orker

Defiance_: Fine Varmint: Defiance_: Fine Varmint: Defiance_: TheCynic: I prefer the food that induces the most fear in the livestock it is derived from.

Chickens are too dumb to be afraid. They just get indignant.

Chickens are only as smart as the people around them.

So you never met any smart chickens?

Hmm.

The only people I've seen trying to teach chickens to count have been really dumb so... I win?

I bit.

So being able to count, counts for smart there where you are?

And being able to count to...21? (pants down)...makes you a winner? (Maybe that extra finger ...a family thing for you?)

Jeez..I have taught the parrot to count higher than that.

How high did you teach a parrot to count to? It sounds like you would make a really good special ed teacher.

I'll bite again.

In your neck of the woods...are there jobs where it ONLY matters if you can count? Counting is considered the educational high there?

djh0101010: including the one bird with the 1/4 stick of dynamite taped to it.

serial killer in training.

seriously, dude, seek help. you're a sick, stupid motherfarker.

Free-range/organic eggs aren't a bullshiat concept meant to prey on your health concerns. They're a bullshiat concept meant to prey on your ethical concerns.

I worked with chickens as a kid, they're basically like thistle plants with legs and an attitude. They're about as picky about their living accommodations as a drunken college student looking for a place to sleep.

Fine Varmint: I may have had a point when I started this. I should go to bed now.

An alpha rooster means there was a lesser rooster..and why have a rooster at all unless you are gonna let a broody hen raise another generation?
Yes the hens lay less in winter cold.

So what city were you raised in before you decided to become a country boy?

Suburb of Milwaukee, does it matter? Chickens are still farking stupid and yummy. They were 3 years old and production was less than the cost of egglayer feed from the co-op. Numbers are numbers, and hassle factor made the decision easy. The chicken coop is now home to the tractor and various 3-point implements, and the chicken yard gave us great fertilizer for 10 years or so.

Let me guess, you're intending to insult me somehow for not being born in the country, but for having moved here? I've met your type, some of them even have their own teeth.

Its not about health, its about not being barbaric savages with no regard for life

djh0101010

for a farmboy you sure are a prissy-ass biatch

I eat cage free eggs just so you'll hate me.

Fine Varmint: Defiance_: Fine Varmint: Defiance_: Fine Varmint: Defiance_: TheCynic: I prefer the food that induces the most fear in the livestock it is derived from.

Chickens are too dumb to be afraid. They just get indignant.

Chickens are only as smart as the people around them.

So you never met any smart chickens?

Hmm.

The only people I've seen trying to teach chickens to count have been really dumb so... I win?

I bit.

So being able to count, counts for smart there where you are?

And being able to count to...21? (pants down)...makes you a winner? (Maybe that extra finger ...a family thing for you?)

Jeez..I have taught the parrot to count higher than that.

How high did you teach a parrot to count to? It sounds like you would make a really good special ed teacher.

I'll bite again.

In your neck of the woods...are there jobs where it ONLY matters if you can count? Counting is considered the educational high there?

With all of the increased blood flow to my brain, counting gives me an educational high.

djh0101010: Let me guess, you're intending to insult me somehow for not being born in the country, but for having moved here? I've met your type, some of them even have their own teeth.

No, she's just drunk and wants to play. Tell her you failed out of your chicken classes or something.

spleef420: djh0101010: including the one bird with the 1/4 stick of dynamite taped to it.

serial killer in training.

seriously, dude, seek help. you're a sick, stupid motherfarker.

20 years ago and wasn't me, dude. Take it up with some random former cow-orker of mine. Haven't seen them in decades. But sure, my fault, report me or some shiat. Or just STFU, that'd be fine too.

ZipSplat: I worked with chickens as a kid, they're basically like thistle plants with legs and an attitude. They're about as picky about their living accommodations as a drunken college student looking for a place to sleep.

That's how I feel about the matter. Hell, I used to watch my dad's hens kill each other in hen-pecking parties. We used to have to lock them up at night because the raccoon or skunk would come by and kill a few. That's life. And death. It's a chicken, fark.

brainiac-dumdum: djh0101010

for a farmboy you sure are a prissy-ass biatch

Funny, the farmboy insults me for being born in the city, and you insult me for being a farmboy. How about the two of you idiots go fellate each other and get back to me on this, er, never.

jiesenPSD: djh0101010: Defiance_: Fine Varmint: Defiance_: TheCynic:



cow-orker. heh.
/cow-orker

Heh indeed.

Popeye the parrot pointed that out to me.

But I did not want to explain what an orker was.

I am hoping he will never have to learn that.

/Okay. I am not taking care of my feathered snowflake like I should.
//What you gonna do about it?

Gyrfalcon: Knucklepopper: Gyrfalcon: Nakito: What about peaches that come in a can?

Peaches aren't often debeaked and forced to live in cages before they lay eggs. So canned or free-range taste about the same.

Yeah, yeah, you just don't hear them scream.

Peaches don't really care....they're pretty passive. It's nectarines that put up a fight when you try to can them. Seriously, blood everywhere.

Or is that oranges? I may be getting my fruits confused.

Yeah, those nectarines are evil mofos. Thin skinned beeyotches and bitter as hell. Seedy, too.

/orange you glad I didn't go on with other fruits?
//I just didn't want to come across as being acidic.

Funny, the farmboy insults me for being born in the city, and you insult me for being a farmboy. How about the two of you idiots go fellate each other and get back to me on this, er, never.

quibbling over who called you what isn't helping you shed the 'prissy-assed biatch' label.

also, I am not equipped to be fellated as I am female.
now go cry about conjunctions to someone who cares.

brainiac-dumdum: Funny, the farmboy insults me for being born in the city, and you insult me for being a farmboy. How about the two of you idiots go fellate each other and get back to me on this, er, never.

quibbling over who called you what isn't helping you shed the 'prissy-assed biatch' label.

also, I am not equipped to be fellated as I am female.
now go cry about conjunctions to someone who cares.

This guy?

djh0101010: including the one bird with the 1/4 stick of dynamite taped to it. cluck cluck cluck boom splatter.

Wow your a farking hick.

This thread is relevant to my interests.

I never ate cage free because of nutrition, I just don't eat eggs from criminals.

Alyna_jf: laying about 78 billion eggs annually (or 6.5 billion dozen)

ohh... thank god they calculated that for me. that could have been confusing.

Why the hate? I thought that was a useful calculation. Do you normally calculate fractions of a dozen in your head, as a matter or course?

Fine Varmint:
Heh indeed.

Popeye the parrot pointed that out to me.

But I did not want to explain what an orker was.

I am hoping he will never have to learn that.

/Okay. I am not taking care of my feathered snowflake like I should.
//What you gonna do about it?

I'm pretty sure if you let your bird get sick through negligence it's illegal.

/ill-eagle
//I didn't start it.

MisterLoki this guy?

lol, yes, he fits the bill.

brainiac-dumdum: Funny, the farmboy insults me for being born in the city, and you insult me for being a farmboy. How about the two of you idiots go fellate each other and get back to me on this, er, never.

quibbling over who called you what isn't helping you shed the 'prissy-assed biatch' label.

also, I am not equipped to be fellated as I am female.
now go cry about conjunctions to someone who cares.

You mean molt the 'prissy-assed biatch' label. This is a bird thread, keep up country girl.

/got nuthin'

obviousfakename: Thank God that all these people who have never touched a live chicken, or heard a live chicken, or smelled a live chicken, or fed a live chicken, or bought chicken feed, or built a chicken house, or killed a chicken, or plucked a chicken, or dealt with chicken shiat, or taken out a loan to buy chickens, or had anything whatsoever to do with the entire industry, feel that they have strong individual opinions about the poultry industry.

What a bizarre assumption. There have been several posters in this thread who have raised chickens, and who have expressed their opinions. I've got an opinion. I've raised chickens, too. Guess what? I dislike chickens. They're assholes. I still prefer the cage free chickens and their eggs to the battery farmed chickens. I'd rather have eggs from feathery assholes who peck around in grass and eat bugs than eggs from featherless, colorless, sickly things that live in wire cages and don't know that things other than bright yellow kernels can be food.

You're making shiat up about people and judging the validity of their opinions based on shiat you made up. Well, thank God for you and your strong opinions, then.

People that care that much about animals with such a blatant lack of self-awareness and reasoning capacity as chickens need to get out in the world and experience them more closely.

Animals do not live in our human ethical construct. Stop anthropomorphizing them. Hell, it wasn't even until recently that HUMANS lived in a human ethical construct.

It's a chicken. Stop pretending it gives a shiat, worry about the real miserable people around you, or at least find something constructive to do with your mental energy.

Defiance_

You mean molt the 'prissy-assed biatch' label. This is a bird thread, keep up country girl.

lol, i'm a city girl through and through and proud of it.

I do like your clever 'molt' joke though.

PacManDreaming: As for the article, I think a lot of people like free range eggs because they taste better.

Raise your hands, raise your voice,
Give the chickens another choice,
Join with me, set them free,
Brothers and sisters, let the chickens be.

chicken Plucker
Pink Panther style
or South Park style

Nakito: What about peaches that come in a can?

Depends. Were they put there by a man?

djh0101010: Fine Varmint: I may have had a point when I started this. I should go to bed now.

An alpha rooster means there was a lesser rooster..and why have a rooster at all unless you are gonna let a broody hen raise another generation?
Yes the hens lay less in winter cold.

So what city were you raised in before you decided to become a country boy?

Suburb of Milwaukee, does it matter? Chickens are still farking stupid and yummy. They were 3 years old and production was less than the cost of egglayer feed from the co-op. Numbers are numbers, and hassle factor made the decision easy. The chicken coop is now home to the tractor and various 3-point implements, and the chicken yard gave us great fertilizer for 10 years or so.

Let me guess, you're intending to insult me somehow for not being born in the country, but for having moved here? I've met your type, some of them even have their own teeth.

What in my post made you feel insulted?

Unlike your:I've met your type, some of them even have their own teeth.

Oh you have never met my 'type'. And I have all my teeth.

3 years is a bit late for culling the hens.

And you actually bought in to buying egglayer feed?

Throw them some corn and milo and let them run in the woods (or land - with the garden put off limits) they gives them eggs just fine.

ZipSplat

yes, yes, your inability to feel empathy for creatures of lesser cognition is admirable and does not come across as defensive at all

ZipSplat: People that care that much about animals with such a blatant lack of self-awareness and reasoning capacity as chickens need to get out in the world and experience them more closely.

Animals do not live in our human ethical construct. Stop anthropomorphizing them. Hell, it wasn't even until recently that HUMANS lived in a human ethical construct.

It's a chicken. Stop pretending it gives a shiat, worry about the real miserable people around you, or at least find something constructive to do with your mental energy.

What, precisely, are you trying to say? That animals don't feel pain? That once one enters the "real world" one will be in favor of animal torture? That if one chooses not to contribute to the excessive suffering of animals, they will not care about the suffering of humans?

Oh, you're just a moron. Carry on.

the argument was never cage free is healthier, it's that cage free is more humane. and tastes better. morans

I'm not above eating eggs from the grocery store at $.89/dozen, but I much prefer the farm fresh ones I get for free from grandma. They're various shades of white and brown, come in anywhere from huge to tiny, and usually still have chicken shiat and feathers on them, but they really do taste better. The color difference in the yolks is remarkable - they are a much darker orange. The only downside is that they don't hard boil well. They tend to burst more often than store eggs and don't peel nearly as well. I've heard the reason for that is that the eggs you get in the store are at least a couple of months old and usually a lot more before you ever buy them, and they shrink inside the shell over time. I have no way of proving that and I'm far too drunk/lazy to look it up, but it makes sense. Oh, and as someone who was born and raised on a small family farm and whose family still farms, factory farms suck. I'm certainly no PETA member, but even I am disgusted by high concentration farming. It's cruel and disgusting. It's also completely unnecessary if we would change some of our farm policies, but it's highly profitable so I don't see change coming anytime soon.

ZipSplat Quote 2010-07-10 12:52:08 AM

It's a chicken. Stop pretending it gives a shiat

>>>

let me guess, you beat your dog?

It's about supporting the portion of the industry that treats the chickens better. Some people are willing to pay more to subsidize those people. Better than the government taxing us and subsidizing them.

Defiance_:

With all of the increased blood flow to my brain, counting gives me an educational high.

In this day and time..ya gets your highs where you can get them.