cedarpark: You can just take that brown lettuce and green/white tomatoes back the fark of my sammich. kthx.

Dude, its Endive and Heirlooms.

sure haven't: Bunnyhat: make me some tea: Pet peeve: sloppy sandwich preparers.

Seriously, how f*cking hard is it to arrange presliced meat and cheese on top of bread so that it doesn't fall out all over the place as soon as you unwrap it?

I stopped going to those awful sandwich chains in large part because of the idiots who don't give a rat's ass about the food they're preparing.


I'm going to make the same amount of money an hour at Subway if I make the best looking sub in the world compared to if I make a crappy looking sub.


So now we know what kind of employee and person you are.
You can use that rationale about any job. Even a CEO can say "well I get my $250,000 bonus whether I meet with these stockbrokers or not". Except anyone in his position wouldn't say that because it takes work, not slobby laziness to become a CEO.

Take pride in what you do. Doesn't matter if you're cleaning toilets. You might be getting minimum wage, but at least you can say I did this work, and did it to the best of my ability.

Have fun falling wherever you land in life, cause with that attitude, you won't be "going" anywhere. At least not on purpose.

Well, actually if you are a CEO making $250k, you have a lot to lose if you are lazy. Losing a Subway job might not mean a lot, especially to students. Still, if you slack off at Subway, it might not look good to prospective employers at "career" jobs.

Quark_Quasar: I have been wanting half of an animal in my stomach, lately.

And you said you DIDN'T miss me ...

CygnusDarius: What would you say if someone in another country offers you a tamale, or a piping hot bowl of goulash, or some roasted guinea pig? .

"Thanks!"?

/never had guinea pig -- would imagine it's similar to rabbit

spleef420: dangerdoug: I'm workin' on it, shut up or I'll eat you.

gotta catch me first, fatboy. ;)

*sets foot in tripping position* Watch your step.

LemSkroob:
Actually, it doesn't!

Link (new window)

Meh -- doesn't matter. Since ethanol is a common metabolic byproduct of yeast, we're well-adapted to deal with it.

And to the poster who said that they respected religeous dietary law over the vegan snowflakes, consider this. The hipsterdouchevegan got that way because a VISIBLE friend told them to eat that way. The theotards do it because an INVISIBLE friend did.

vudukungfu

///I was a farking ledgend at that shop. (the college kids told me)


College kids also think Dane Cook is funny.

Englebert Slaptyback: vudukungfu

///I was a farking ledgend at that shop. (the college kids told me)


College kids also think Dane Cook is funny.

Old people like to put onions on their belts.

you_idiot: BMT = good (I asked the owned what BMT meant, he had no idea)

Big Meat Trio

I remember that from the late 80's when it was still spelled out on the menu.

Englebert Slaptyback: College kids also think Dane Cook is funny.

Who the fark is dane cook?
I'll look it up later.
If I can remember it and IF I think it's important.

They thought I was funny because if a guy waited in line and asked if we made sandwiches, I would say YES, then NEXT. and make the stoner get to the rear of the line.
I made the soup nazi look lame.
I built the sandwich as you told me what you wanted on it and I didn't let you take time away from the other folks waiting in line.
BAM!
Large or small?
Wheat or white? (cuts appropriate bread)
Mustard or mayo? ( Spreads it as you say it)
American provalone swiss or cheddar? (Cheese is on)
Lettuce, Tomatoe, onions, hot peppers, sprouts, green peppers, pickles? ( Adds them as you say yes)
What kind of meat? ( Pops it on, cuts sandwich and wraps it and hands it to you)
"Thank you for shopping here. Drive safe, chew slow, Put your seatbelt on, and watch out for the other guy"..."Next!"

How farking hard is that to do?
Yeah, I sent the stoners to the end of the line, but you better believe mr munchies had the routine down when it came his second turn to order.

Lookit me, everybuddy, I'm a bratty teenager! Poop! Fart! Ha ha!

knightofargh: you_idiot: BMT = good (I asked the owned what BMT meant, he had no idea)

Big Meat Trio

I remember that from the late 80's when it was still spelled out on the menu.

Actually, it means Biggest, Meatiest, Tastiest.
Link

/I always hated that sandwich

CygnusDarius: Englebert Slaptyback: vudukungfu

///I was a farking ledgend at that shop. (the college kids told me)


College kids also think Dane Cook is funny.

Old people like to put onions on their belts.

Well, it was the style at the time...

I worked at a Subway that was open 24 hours a day on a college campus and students could just charge it to their parents. Absolute shiatshow every night of drunken hilarity; the place was horribly run and still just fell into an unbelievable amount of money.

Everyone within a 50 foot radius was stoned, customers and workers alike. We would get all sorts of crazy stoner requests like seafood salad and pizza sauce and would run out of supplies like crazy. There was one night we had nothing but salami and chicken and still had a line out the door. I intentionally worked the 10pm-3am just for the extra dollar an hour and for the nonexistent supervision.

vudukungfu: And to the poster who said that they respected religeous dietary law over the vegan snowflakes, consider this. The hipsterdouchevegan got that way because a VISIBLE friend told them to eat that way. The theotards do it because an INVISIBLE friend did.

Show me a Hindu that makes a sissy fit in a restaurant, and I'll show you three vegans that get a sudden anemia hit when they do it.

I like all the folks in this thread who bemoan small things (like getting mustard off the "unwiped knife") from someone making a sammich for them. It's ironic (and pleasant to me) to hear someone who is too lazy to make their own food at all, complaining about minor things in food preparation.

/also found the "vegetarian who got pork in her soup" story awesome
//also, fark people's religious dietary stuff
///do like the hebrew national dogs, though
////doesn't think they make imaginary sky gods like him

Sylvia_Bandersnatch: Lookit me, everybuddy, I'm a bratty teenager! Poop! Fart! Ha ha!

Isn't there a myspace page you should be looking at?

KatjaMouse: Seriously. A friend and I went into a Five Guys in Richmond, VA on the day that the Franchise owner happened to be there. I went up to the counter and just told them that I didn't want mustard and pickles and was wondering if my order was mixed up. Next thing I know, not only does the owner hop behind the counter and start to assemble my burger himself but he then writes me a voucher that's good for one free burger and drink in the future.

/Well, he sure as hell appreciated my business more than the burned out college kid who made it to begin with
//It was also the most competently put together burger I've ever had a Five Guys


Of course the owner cares. He directly profits from your business. He has incentive.
$7.25 an hour is only an incentive for the store to break even for continued employment. The burned out college kid doesn't need your business to make sure the store breaks even.

I done larnt me a new word today. Tessulatize.

moothemagiccow: Cagey B: Consumerist: For those victimized by the vast minimum-wage employee conspiracy.

yeah because only minimum wage employees are lazy as hell

knightofargh: Big Meat Trio

bigger meatier tastier

not trio

ham, salami, pepperoni, bologna...not a trio

/is it sad that I still remember that after 15 years?

spleef420: knightofargh: Big Meat Trio

bigger meatier tastier

not trio

ham, salami, pepperoni, bologna...not a trio

/is it sad that I still remember that after 15 years?

There's no bologna on it, you're thinking of the cold cut trio.

CygnusDarius: Show me a Hindu that makes a sissy fit in a restaurant, and I'll show you three vegans that get a sudden anemia hit when they do it.

Some folks are really reasonable about it, some aren't.

The uncle of a friend I knew from Pakistan one time was at a dinner and had some dish which he later found out had some meat that he abstained from. He bemoaned the situation, not because of the meat he had consumed, but because it tasted so good that he previously hadn't known/remembered what he was missing, and had (at the time of the story telling) had yearned for it again every day for weeks.

/people who throw hissy fits about anything are just attention whores who have had little control over their lives in the past, and so want to exert control in any small, annoying way they can
//see also: anorexics

CygnusDarius [TotalFark] Quote 2010-07-06 02:06:24 PM

Where cows are sacred?.

>>>>

just proving a point that it isn't only the spoiled 1st world that has viewpoints where people eat vegan or vegetarian. But keep believing it because maybe .05% of the population is a militant vegan for no real reason

Cheesus: There's no bologna on it

there was when I worked there.

kuaq:
Boy is it gratifying to have the store manager instruct their peons to redo something when they have a full queue of customers staring at them waiting to get their own sandwich made.

You sound like the kind of customer that made him disgruntled in the first place. It's not enough that he's working for a non-living wage. You need to stick it to him by biatching about something and you take pleasure in knowing that he could possibly lose his small income. Nice.

KatjaMouse: Jaws_Victim: See, if you did that people would complain and make your life worse. This way, it's a minor inconvenience and people will just sit their miserably eating their sad sandwich

This sounds suspiciously like the beginning of Good Omens.

Ha! Such inconvenience and petty misery will promote wanton dog kicking and sharp words yelled at innocent kids.

Nexzus: If you're ever in Vancouver, make a point to visit La Charcuterie Delicatessen (new window) in stay the fark out of Surrey.

FTFY

PsyLord: Sergeant Grumbles: shivashakti: hey're working their asses off for crappy pay and sh*tty benefits.

There is no and. At the majority of fast food restaurants, workers will never, ever get paid beyond a dollar above minimum wage and that is the only thing they'll get from working there. They might offer a crappy insurance plan, but it's always something useless like $60 a month for $10,000 deductible and 50% co-pay up to $20,000. Nothing that would ever benefit someone making $7.75 an hour.
If you make it to assistant manager or general manager, you might have some more options, especially at a corporate owned chain, but you're still stuck working at Subway.

/Works for Five Guys Burgers, grill
//Best ticket times in the store
///The owner says he's too poor to give me, or anyone else, a pay raise
////Also too poor to buy degreaser, squeegees, or dustpans
//Store makes $1.5 million a year

Note to self: avoid Five Guys Burgers in Greenville, SC.

For what it's worth, the 5GB in Hockessin, DE has been steadily developing a layer of grease thick enough to make the tile floor function as a skating rink. Their burgers are still immaculate.

It's like there is some kind of latent greasy mist that is constantly being produced by the awesomeness that are their burgers that gets condensed onto the cold tile floor. I seriously can't explain how greasy this floor is. There is no word. "Greasy" just doesn't cut it. Is their another word for greasy? A greasier word?

I don't have a problem with Subway except for a couple of things. The clean knife being one of them. My son is deathly allergic to dairy. The last time we went, I had the girl get a fresh knife because the one she was going to use had chunks of cheese on it. She rolled her eyes at me until I offered to let her take care of my son when he starts puking all over the place and develops hives all over.
The other problem is that they don't make the divot cut anymore. And if you ask for it, you're met with a blank stare as if you're asking for a steak, rare.

/Cheese on the side for the rest of us in the family.
//Olives, too, please!
///Wife worked at Subway for extra money at college.
////Meatballs and frozen bread make great baseball equipment.

PsyLord: The Five Guys here is not bad. They haven't messed up an order yet. Their burgers are decent, but after reading the nutritional information about them, I've been limiting my intake.

If I want a burger, I usually just cook them at home. Slap on some PB and J, bacon, lettuce, and tomato, and I'm all good.

Five Guys has a reputation for good burgers, but even then they just use 85/15 Ground Beef. It costs more for one burger at Five Guys than a pound of similar ground beef at your local grocery store. There's no special cooking method. Throw it on the grill, smash it flat, flip it, flip it, flip it. Done. Ideally, it takes 6 minutes.
Part of the depressing nature of these jobs is that the customer just paid $1 a minute to get a burger, but $7.25/hr is all you get for serving 500 customers in an hour.

Sergeant Grumbles: Five Guys has a reputation for good burgers,

I don't know why. I've tried burgers from them on multiple occasions and was not at all impressed.

BeesNuts: For what it's worth, the 5GB in Hockessin, DE has been steadily developing a layer of grease thick enough to make the tile floor function as a skating rink. Their burgers are still immaculate.

It's like there is some kind of latent greasy mist that is constantly being produced by the awesomeness that are their burgers that gets condensed onto the cold tile floor. I seriously can't explain how greasy this floor is. There is no word. "Greasy" just doesn't cut it. Is their another word for greasy? A greasier word?

It's great until the owner comes in, tells you it looks like shiat and makes you try and clean it with only hot water. There is literally so much grease that it overloads out venting system, cakes onto it, and then spews out in giant groady loads on the floor. You have to scrape those up with spatulas.

you_idiot: BMT = good (I asked the owned what BMT meant, he had no idea)

According to their old ads, it stands for "Big meaty tasty"...never had one so I don't know if that's true or not.

The subs from the deli at Publix grocery stores but Subway, and everybody else, to shame.

This is the saddest fan verse to Denis Leary's Asshole Song that I've ever read.

i call my dick the footlong bmt

FarkingBabs: you_idiot: BMT = good (I asked the owned what BMT meant, he had no idea)

According to their old ads, it stands for "Big meaty tasty"...never had one so I don't know if that's true or not.

I actually believe it originated from the "Brooklyn - Manhattan Transit," which would make sense since there name is Subway.

Knara: Sergeant Grumbles: Five Guys has a reputation for good burgers,

I don't know why. I've tried burgers from them on multiple occasions and was not at all impressed.

I've had 5 Guys burgers on multiple occasions and have always been impressed.

I used to eat at Subway all the time .. 10 years ago .. For some reason, I'd gotten attached to the Meatball subs, and always had them made the same way - Extra cheese, onions, black olives, and a few hot peppers. I would actually tell them that I really DID mean 'a few', and that I really just wanted 2 or 3 of them, hidden in various spots.

Mistake I made? Never give this order to anyone getting the sandwich for you. If anyone was getting the sub for me, I learned to just leave off the hot peppers. I got one sub that was just PACKED with them, probably because they were pissed off to get such a specific order from someone who couldn't explain (or just did not know) what I meant by 'a few'.

I went into another Subway one time around midnight, and the girl working there looked about 14, a tiny little thing. I decided to to get my sub made that same way, but with Double Meat. I asked for that, and the girl just stared at me blankly at first, then said "That's not possible..". I asked her what she meant, and she said there wouldn't be any room for everything.

I tried to walk her through making it, and I ended up with what had to be the messiest, most god awful mess of a sandwich I'd ever seen. Simple math avoided her, and she ended up putting triple meat on it, and adding a heap of sauce as well.

She ended up apologizing a half dozen times, and just charged me for a regular sub. I think she thought I was there to murder her or something - it turns out it was her first shift alone in the place, and I scared her. I was a giant in black combat boots and ripped jeans ..

/Boring Story, Bro. I want my 5 minutes back.

The Angry Hand of God: I've had 5 Guys burgers on multiple occasions and have always been impressed.

I'd suggest, then, that you take the opportunity to find someone who can make you a good burger, so you know what one tastes like.

/same stands for in-n-out