"Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?"

TheFarkinEmpress: "I now pronounce you Sir Duke of Earl, Sir Baloney of Sandwich, and the King of Cool. You may rise."

Now with votey goodness!

President Obama greets Garicolman, King of the Pygmy
Follow President Obama on Twitter
Follow Garicolman on Twitter
Follow Pygmy on Twitter

"White House later confirmed that the President was not bowing to accept the blessing of the brutal boy-king Imam Ibn Banir Butahl Muhammed. Instead, it he most assuredly to be picking up a pin sent to him by the gold star mothers of America that he holds very close to his heart at all times because he does not hate this country. (Not Pictured: the really real pin he was looking for)" - Newsweek

That's how you rub one out.

President Barack Obama mistakes a small black child for the Emperor of Japan.

beowulfmpf: "ALLAHU AKBAR! You will be granted seventy virgins for this Barack, but you must complete what you have started. And we know how it must end!"

What poopsmith said!

"Dark and Lovely Fade-Resistant Rich Conditioning Color is permanent hair color which delivers vibrant, fade-resistant color and shine."

"Oh, there are my approval ratings. Thank you, son."

"Rub my head for good luck."

"Hold still while I finish pulling the lice offa yer head"

Webster shows his pimp hand.

Once in a while, I'm standing here, doing something.
And I think, "What in the world am I doing here?"
It's a big surprise.

Like FDR's wheelchair, President Obama's smaller conjoined twin is often left out of official photos. Here they discuss further sanctions against North Korea.

"Feels good man."

I told you patting my head was like pulling my finger. Now, don't breathe too deeply.

"Out! Out, demons of incompetence!"

there you are peter pan.

"No son, that's not how you do it! Remember what the priest taught you"

"As I suspected! ....Cobwebs..."

"this is the position I take when the bankers visit"

The President's narcolepsy was becoming more and more pronounced.

Not long after this encounter where he was critical of the President's hair, Gary Coleman was pronounced dead from injuries sustained from an "accidental" fall.

It was only when Obama tried to stand up again that he realized too late that the kid had put Krazy Glue on his hand.

That's the half black.

With your height, you must really stick to the ceiling when jumping on the bed!

Snapper Carr: "When you grow up, your pubes will feel just like this."

Now with voting goodness.

"Maybe I can be president too!"

Listen to that echo!

When Obama was elected President, it fundamentally changed the future for children like this little boy. These children will grow up in a world where a minority President is not some tertiary character in a lame television drama, but a reality, something that can be achieved. Some people see this as a good thing. Others are like Phil, Moose, and Snapper.
/How do you boys get your sheets so white? I would think the soot marks would be impossible to remove.

"Smell your own, biatch!"

Just one turn of the switch here and *chunk* there we are. This president is now "Funky"

Your wish is my command, oh holy Muhammad al-Mahdi (new window)

I want the knife......please.....

"When Farkers suck my cock, they bend down like this..."

Did I plug the hole yet? Who sent you? Who?!? Wait---ow! OW!! My head! My HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAD!!!!!

"The youngster wanted to see if the President's haircut felt like his own."

"Well Mr. Obama, you're half way there"

In a rare, behind the scenes Oval Office display, we see the operator has stepped out of the Obamatron in order to make some last minute adjustments before the start of the next press conference.

Obama meets his long lost illegitimate son.

Here the president is seen using one of the lesser known executive powers: full corpeal manifestation of the inner child. The the first manifest congratulates the president on having perfected the important skill.

"Once again, Obama shows his un-American-ness by bowing under pressure."

"that'll do pig"