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Astronaut dogmeat, plowed farmers, and Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet: Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week 5/9 - 5/15
Posted by Drew at 2010-05-18 12:53:47 PM (10 comments) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog

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4190 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 May 2010 at 2:00 PM (7 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Nothing new this week, so enjoy the headlines.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2010-05-09 to Sat 2010-05-15:

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  American Mensa holds its annual convention in Detroit this year. Slogan: "Who's the genius that picked Detroit?"    
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  Man arrested after stealing $8,350 worth of Apple merchandise. Police say they have recovered both Macbook Pros    
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  Two medical-marijuana businesses firebombed, drawing hundreds of spectators downwind    
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  Libyan plane crashes in Tripoli, over 100 dead. Only one child survives, who will be pursued mercilessly by Mr. Glass    
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  Two homeless men accused of killing a third homeless man, could face harsh sentence of being provided with shelter, clothing and food indefinitely    
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  Gay-hating activist who toured Europe with a gay male escort resigns, rather than leave his friend's behind    
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  Tiger penis found at Auckland Airport. There was a golf tournament in New Zealand?    
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  Actual headline: "3d man now faces murder charge" What a relief    
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  While in orbit, Chinese astronauts eat dog meat to keep their strength up and their senses as Shar Peis possible    
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  Farmer killed when tractor rolls over him. An autopsy is pending, but at this point police suspect he was plowed    
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  Census worker shot at by lawyer who supports the tally ban    
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Sports:

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  Kareem Abdul-Jabbar says rookies have it too easy, expect too much, need to try dragging Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes    
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  Kansas City Royals promote Trey Hillman from manager to ex-manager    
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  Hey Cleveland, hope you like hobbits, because that's the only way you're going to see the return of the king    
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Geek:

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  Astronomers find 9.6 billion-year-old object; scheduled to host SNL in June    
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  Toyota announces that they should have a $50K hydrogen-powered sedan ready by early 2015, with recalls ready by mid-to-late 2015    
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  Nasal spray developed to help prevent over-eating. Submitter remembers hearing about something similar using powder and a straw    
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Showbiz:

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  Kim Kardashian wants a man who sees her good qualities, five lights    
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  Megan Fox, bisexual star of Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipisicing elit    
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  Kristen Stewart "had done it with a bunch of guys" before Robert Pattinson. That makes two of them    
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Politics:

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  Observers wondering whether the Barack Obama-David Cameron relationship will be "special," like how Churchill and FDR used to keep close correspondence, or how Tony Blair vacationed up George Bush's ass    
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  Chavez says he will not attend summit because Honduran leader is attending. Honduras suddenly invited to dozens more meetings    
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  Woody Allen thinks we should make Obama a dictator "for a few years" so he could do a lot of good quickly, end Clone War    
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Music:

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  Roger Waters explains the inspiration behind The Wall was his first ex-wife. Guess she wouldn't eat the meat but wanted the pudding    
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  Rapper Trae Tha Truth sues radio station, Webster's Dictionary    
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  Slash, Ace Frehley, Motorhead's Lemmy and Cheri Curie honor Betty Ford during tribute, for providing them with a place to stay between tours    
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Business:

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  Turkey agrees to let Russia build an oil pipeline in exchange for Russia agreeing to ask before building it    
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  "The increase in unemployment is a sign of a stronger job market, but it is also a sign of how weak the job market still is," says economist Mark "Yogi Berra" Zandi    
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  Ford does not know what to do with Lincoln, should ask Booth    
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· · ·

10 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2010-05-18 01:10:37 PM  
What? No words of wisdom about the media getting tired of the oil spill yet still ignoring Nashville? How about the lack of coverage for the Thai civil war?

Not even a peep about hurricane predictions?
 
2010-05-18 01:15:14 PM  

netweavr: What? No words of wisdom about the media getting tired of the oil spill yet still ignoring Nashville? How about the lack of coverage for the Thai civil war?

Not even a peep about hurricane predictions?


None of that is "new."
 
2010-05-18 01:19:55 PM  

netweavr: What? No words of wisdom about the media getting tired of the oil spill yet still ignoring Nashville? How about the lack of coverage for the Thai civil war?

Not even a peep about hurricane predictions?


"Nothing new this week" is Drew-speak for "I got a mother of a hangover and the glow from my monitor is making me feel the need to puke".

It's an efficient dialect.
 
2010-05-18 02:06:14 PM  

img1.fark.net Ford does not know what to do with Lincoln, should ask Booth


This is probably my favorite one out of the lineup.

/not mine
 
2010-05-18 02:14:09 PM  
Sweet, I not only made the HOTW, I made the headline!

/Lorem ipsum
//no, I don't have a life, why do you ask?
 
2010-05-18 02:33:57 PM  

netweavr: What? No words of wisdom about the media getting tired of the oil spill yet still ignoring Nashville? How about the lack of coverage for the Thai civil war?

Not even a peep about hurricane predictions?


It's not really a civil war at the moment, but it's definitely got the potential to become one if talks keep falling through and enough people lose hope that there are alternatives for resolving the conflict. Most Thai comments online seem to express a strong desire to avoid war, but that's not always enough.

I have seen a fair bit of coverage online of the protests. I haven't watched cable news in a couple of weeks so I don't know how they're doing, though Fark itself has been really lacking on links (and the comments are mostly Star Trek references)
 
2010-05-18 02:39:02 PM  
The 3D man one took me a few seconds. Nice.
 
2010-05-18 03:04:40 PM  

dstanley: Sweet, I not only made the HOTW, I made the headline!

/Lorem ipsum
//no, I don't have a life, why do you ask?


+1 to you. Great headline.
 
2010-05-18 03:40:44 PM  
The Megan Fox is a classic but the Tiger one is a great spin as well
 
2010-05-19 12:10:22 AM  
Nothing new this week?
So all the voting opportunities are only due to a lot of greenlit voting-enhanced articles.
Or maybe it's a celebration of primary voting week.
 
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