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(USA Today)   10 vacation destinations perfect for Farkers & Farkettes   (usatoday.com) divider line 108
    More: Cool, Maui, champagne, Kyoto, web host, perfect  
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19103 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 May 2010 at 2:18 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-05-15 01:15:18 PM
Or you could just stay at home and drink Bud Light.
 
2010-05-15 02:18:50 PM
RTFA. It never mentioned anything about All-You-Can-Eat buffets. That leaves the TFettes SOL.
 
2010-05-15 02:22:04 PM
Other people's basements?
 
2010-05-15 02:23:45 PM
FTA: He particularly likes the Quaich bar in the Craigellachie hotel in the town of Speyside, which stocks nearly 700 whiskies.

*Swoons*
 
2010-05-15 02:27:54 PM
5) Spelling and punctuation classes.
4) Eye doctor and palm depilatory facility.
3) AA meeting.
2) Fat camp.
1) Outside.
 
2010-05-15 02:28:16 PM

FTFA:

Dublin

"The first thing I do when I get off the plane in Ireland is order a pint of Guinness," Lamprey says

Ah, Guinness, the most overrated beer in the world.
 
2010-05-15 02:29:01 PM
assuming all farkers/farkettes drink, which i don't

/thanks for nothing
//bye bye
 
2010-05-15 02:30:45 PM
4 of those places are in Europe. 2 of those are European colonies, and a third is an American state.

10 great places to drink in other cultures indeed
 
2010-05-15 02:31:06 PM
Dublin
Or buy Guinness at the supermarket and enjoy your beer without any of those dirty Irishmen around.

Scotland
Or buy a bottle at the liquor store and enjoy whiskey at home or with friends instead of with incomprehensible Scotsmen.

Brussels
Or put a slice of orange in your domestic pale ale and avoid the whole spoiled beer experience.

Kyoto, Japan
Or have a popsicle and use the stick to force yourself to throw up all night.

Maui, Hawaii
No snark. This is a great place to spend a vacation.

South Africa
Detroit is closer and they speak English.

New Zealand
Oregon has lots of great wines that are better than anything NZ has. Granted, you can't get the same quality of sheep over here, but wtf you pervert?

Champagne, France
Or buy a bottle of California sparkling wine at the grocery store. Cheaper and you'll be throwing up just as well on either one.

Tequila, Mexico
If there's anything you don't want to do, it's get blindingly drunk on tequila in Mexico. Stay at home, man.

Krakow, Poland
Two words: Old Crow.
 
2010-05-15 02:31:33 PM
PresentCompanyExcluded: assuming all farkers/farkettes drink, which i don't

/thanks for nothing
//bye bye


Present company excluded, PresentCompanyExcluded.
 
2010-05-15 02:31:50 PM
Where else to drink Scotch than the British isle for which it's named?

Scotland isn't an island.

"The holy grail for whiskey drinkers would be full of Scotch," Lamprey says.

Whisky, if one is in Scotland or referring to the Scottish drink.

"Whiskey was invented in Ireland

No it wasn't.

the town of Speyside

Speyside isn't a town.
 
sn0
2010-05-15 02:33:52 PM
PresentCompanyExcluded: assuming all farkers/farkettes drink, which i don't

/thanks for nothing
//bye bye


Ugh. There's always one in the bunch.
 
2010-05-15 02:34:03 PM
"It's vodka made from pineapples right there in Maui, but it doesn't taste like pineapples. It just tastes like vodka."

That's retarded.
 
2010-05-15 02:35:52 PM
Regarding Dublin, any Farker going over there MUST try Porterhouse Wrasslers XXXX stout - it is to Guinness what Guinness is to water. Also the 'Plain Porter' at Messrs Maguires (20 yards from O'Connell Bridge) is worth a detour for.

Cannot disagree with Belgium - although I would suggest that Bruges is a nicer place to enjoy a fine glass of Grimbergen (etc) than Brussels.
 
2010-05-15 02:39:54 PM
Needlessly left out (IMHO):

Istanbul, Turkiye: Raki is awesome stuff. The best part about it (same goes with Ouzo) is once you drink it, EVERYTHING tastes like water for the next half-hour.
 
2010-05-15 02:40:33 PM
jaytkay: "It's vodka made from pineapples right there in Maui, but it doesn't taste like pineapples. It just tastes like vodka."

That's retarded.


Why?
 
2010-05-15 02:41:37 PM
FloydA: 5) Spelling and punctuation classes.
4) Eye doctor and palm depilatory facility.
3) AA meeting.
2) Fat camp.
1) Outside.


Comic book convention
Canadian girlfriend's house
 
2010-05-15 02:41:54 PM
I worked in Brussels for about 6 months. They have more varieties of beer than anywhere else in the world.

/Wanna go back
 
2010-05-15 02:42:23 PM
jaytkay: "It's vodka made from pineapples right there in Maui, but it doesn't taste like pineapples. It just tastes like vodka."

That's retarded.


Would you normally expect vodak to taste of potatoes?
 
2010-05-15 02:43:36 PM
FarkinNortherner: Where else to drink Scotch than the British isle for which it's named?

Scotland isn't an island.

"The holy grail for whiskey drinkers would be full of Scotch," Lamprey says.

Whisky, if one is in Scotland or referring to the Scottish drink.

"Whiskey was invented in Ireland

No it wasn't.

the town of Speyside

Speyside isn't a town.


Yes, but aside from that it was spot on.
 
2010-05-15 02:43:41 PM
Oh, and Maui doesn't qualify as a "different culture" even if it is part of Kenya.
 
2010-05-15 02:44:39 PM
FarkinNortherner: Where else to drink Scotch than the British isle for which it's named?

Scotland isn't an island.

"The holy grail for whiskey drinkers would be full of Scotch," Lamprey says.

Whisky, if one is in Scotland or referring to the Scottish drink.

"Whiskey was invented in Ireland

No it wasn't.

the town of Speyside

Speyside isn't a town.


The sheep weren't there.
You weren't horny.
It didn't happen.
 
2010-05-15 02:44:51 PM
can you purchase boobies? cause that is relevant to whether it's perfect for farkers...
 
2010-05-15 02:45:30 PM
Funny, I thought they were going to be web sites.
 
2010-05-15 02:45:48 PM
I've done the Mexico Tequila thing before. I can't stand tequila anymore.
 
2010-05-15 02:46:12 PM
Solid State Vittles: Oh, and Maui doesn't qualify as a "different culture" even if it is part of Kenya.

*snort*
 
2010-05-15 02:48:10 PM
www.beefjack.com
 
2010-05-15 02:51:04 PM
Solid State Vittles: Oh, and Maui doesn't qualify as a "different culture" even if it is part of Kenya.

bawhahahhahah


^5
 
2010-05-15 02:51:56 PM
I miss Lamprey's show Three Sheets. It was up there with Insomniac with Dave Attell, but with a bigger budget. Can't remember what channel it was on but I don't get it anymore.
 
2010-05-15 02:52:29 PM
Jesus farking christ, what a bunch of half-assed stereo types.
Of course, it's USA Today, so they expect all their readers to be the type that go to Paris and call everyone Frenchy, eat at McD's and then get drunk on Budweiser telling anyone in shouting range that they'd all be speaking german if it weren't for the bravery of his gran-pappy (who was a stock clerk at Camp Pendleton)

Kyoto, Japan: Japan has some excellent single malt whisky.
Try The Yamazaki, it's one of my all-time fav single malts.

New Zealand: While USA Today would recommend the Pinot to loosen up your rented sheep...
Not that there's anything wrong with that... you could try some of the Australian whisky produced right next door that are winning major awards around the world.

Champagne, France: Or you can take a break from whisky and enjoy the smoothness of a good Cognac, Nothern Spain and Southern France are home to some of the best.
 
2010-05-15 02:55:10 PM
If you want something unique, go to Sikkim/Nepal. Chhaang is unlike any drink I'd ever had before and hell or high water I'm going to figure out how to make it here.

Very social drink and the scenery is farking awesome.

It's basically fermented millet, except you don't separate out the millet when it's done and it seems that the millet 'contains' the alcohol since it's more or less dry. So you scoop it into your drinking vessel (Dhungro), then you pour boiling water over it and let it sit, then drink it out of a straw that goes all the way to the bottom. When you're done with it, you pour water over it again. You can usually get 3-4 'drinks' out of one glass of millet. Dump it out and get more.
 
2010-05-15 02:58:20 PM
luckyeddie: Cannot disagree with Belgium - although I would suggest that Bruges is a nicer place to enjoy a fine glass of Grimbergen (etc) than Brussels.

So much this!
 
2010-05-15 02:58:25 PM
jaytkay: "It's vodka made from pineapples right there in Maui, but it doesn't taste like pineapples. It just tastes like vodka."
That's retarded.


FloydA: jaytkay: "It's vodka made from pineapples right there in Maui, but it doesn't taste like pineapples. It just tastes like vodka."

That's retarded.

Why?


I mean it's retarded to put something that simply "tastes like vodka" in a list of interesting drinks.
 
2010-05-15 02:58:34 PM
luckyeddie: Regarding Dublin, any Farker going over there MUST try Porterhouse Wrasslers XXXX stout - it is to Guinness what Guinness is to water. Also the 'Plain Porter' at Messrs Maguires (20 yards from O'Connell Bridge) is worth a detour for.

Cannot disagree with Belgium - although I would suggest that Bruges is a nicer place to enjoy a fine glass of Grimbergen (etc) than Brussels.


If I grew up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me but I didn't, so it doesn't.
 
2010-05-15 02:59:27 PM
farkingismybusiness: I miss Lamprey's show Three Sheets. It was up there with Insomniac with Dave Attell, but with a bigger budget. Can't remember what channel it was on but I don't get it anymore.

That's because that channel went off the air. Yeah, too bad the show couldn't find a new network.
 
2010-05-15 02:59:35 PM
rcain: Jesus farking christ, what a bunch of half-assed stereo types.
Of course, it's USA Today, so they expect all their readers to be the type that go to Paris and call everyone Frenchy, eat at McD's and then get drunk on Budweiser telling anyone in shouting range that they'd all be speaking german if it weren't for the bravery of his gran-pappy (who was a stock clerk at Camp Pendleton)


Yup. You are American, and 87% of you don't even own passports, so what do you expect?

/flame on
 
2010-05-15 03:00:50 PM
eddyatwork: Or you could just stay at home and drink Bud Light.

Yay! I'm on permanent vacation!
 
2010-05-15 03:01:38 PM
Last of the Crazy People: luckyeddie: Regarding Dublin, any Farker going over there MUST try Porterhouse Wrasslers XXXX stout - it is to Guinness what Guinness is to water. Also the 'Plain Porter' at Messrs Maguires (20 yards from O'Connell Bridge) is worth a detour for.

Cannot disagree with Belgium - although I would suggest that Bruges is a nicer place to enjoy a fine glass of Grimbergen (etc) than Brussels.

If I grew up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me but I didn't, so it doesn't.


I never said that Bruges was impressive - I said that it was 'nicer', thick asshat cityboy
 
2010-05-15 03:03:09 PM
Mexico? Um, no. The Eternal Water of Life could be flowing from Aphrodites tits herself and I'd have to pass if she was south of the Rio Grande.
 
2010-05-15 03:10:17 PM
Lord Jubjub: farkingismybusiness: I miss Lamprey's show Three Sheets. It was up there with Insomniac with Dave Attell, but with a bigger budget. Can't remember what channel it was on but I don't get it anymore.

That's because that channel went off the air. Yeah, too bad the show couldn't find a new network.



Such a shame....MOJO was an awesome channel. Unforunately, I didn't hear about it, so when I tuned to channel 664 one day, it was gone. (Not a cool story bro.)

Anyhow, you can catch episodes from the 4th season on FLN (Fine Living Network).

Also....I heard that thew will have new episodes on another channel, but IIRC...Comcast does not carry it.

/Damn it.
//Going to see Zane's live show this summer.
 
2010-05-15 03:15:44 PM
luckyeddie: Last of the Crazy People: luckyeddie: Regarding Dublin, any Farker going over there MUST try Porterhouse Wrasslers XXXX stout - it is to Guinness what Guinness is to water. Also the 'Plain Porter' at Messrs Maguires (20 yards from O'Connell Bridge) is worth a detour for.

Cannot disagree with Belgium - although I would suggest that Bruges is a nicer place to enjoy a fine glass of Grimbergen (etc) than Brussels.

If I grew up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me but I didn't, so it doesn't.

I never said that Bruges was impressive - I said that it was 'nicer', thick asshat cityboy


One gay beer for my gay friend, one normal beer for me because I am normal.
 
Pud [TotalFark]
2010-05-15 03:16:03 PM
gambitsgirl: can you purchase boobies? cause that is relevant to whether it's perfect for farkers...

You can, but they aren't as good as yours. Shoppers, shop around.
 
2010-05-15 03:16:41 PM
Tequila, Mexico

CBS Sunday Morning just did a piece on this very place. Here's the video: Link (new window)
 
2010-05-15 03:18:26 PM
Gordon Bennett: Yes, but aside from that it was spot on.

Exactly.
 
2010-05-15 03:18:54 PM
FTFA:

Champagne, France

Lamprey says Napoleon had it right about Champagne. "In victory, one deserves it; in defeat, one needs it." He quickly embraced the region's culture. "When you go out drinking, you don't have a beer. You drink Champagne." A favorite stop: the Mumm's tour in Rheims, which costs about $13. mumm.com



If I ever make it over to France, I would spend just a little time in Paris, and spend the rest of it in Champagne, Bordeaux, and Burgundy.
 
2010-05-15 03:23:06 PM
If you can't make it to Krakow, he suggests wandering into a Polish bar in any American city and asking the bartender for a recommendation.

Really, any American city you say?
 
2010-05-15 03:26:47 PM
jaytkay:
FloydA: jaytkay: "It's vodka made from pineapples right there in Maui, but it doesn't taste like pineapples. It just tastes like vodka."

That's retarded.

Why?

I mean it's retarded to put something that simply "tastes like vodka" in a list of interesting drinks.



Oh I see.

Yeah, that's a good point. You can make vodka out of anything that has sugar in it; the fact that this was made from pineapples in Hawaii is no more surprising that that other vodkas are made from potatoes, grapes, sugar beets or anything that grows nearby.

My apologies for misunderstanding your point.
 
2010-05-15 03:27:45 PM
CabinBoy: If you can't make it to Krakow, he suggests wandering into a Polish bar in any American city and asking the bartender for a recommendation.

Really, any American city you say?



But every American city should have a Polish bar.

Without checking Google, I don't even know if Seattle has one.
 
2010-05-15 03:28:22 PM
Blue Bonnett Brew-Off 2010! Right here in America.
 
2010-05-15 03:30:38 PM
The_Sponge: CabinBoy: If you can't make it to Krakow, he suggests wandering into a Polish bar in any American city and asking the bartender for a recommendation.

Really, any American city you say?


But every American city should have a Polish bar.

Without checking Google, I don't even know if Seattle has one.


There's Dom Polski on Capitol Hill, but it's not really a bar- it's not even really a restaurant.
Other than that, I can't think of any.
 
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