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(Deadspin)   Best phantom punch since Clay hit Liston takes down soccer player who's apparently made of balsa wood (video)   (deadspin.com) divider line 116
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5169 clicks; posted to Sports » on 28 Apr 2010 at 12:51 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-04-28 12:54:02 PM
You can't tell from the video, but the guy in white had a silenced .38 up his sleeve.
 
2010-04-28 12:54:26 PM
In a fight between a bunch of hockey players, soccer players, and ballet dancers, I'd put my money on the hockey players winning, and the ballet dancers not coming up last.
 
2010-04-28 01:02:41 PM
The Altidore "head butt" wasn't a lot more than that and the guy went down like he had been shot.
 
2010-04-28 01:03:50 PM
They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?
 
2010-04-28 01:07:27 PM
If refs would just start red carding the blatant dives like they are supposed to be doing, this shiat would be cleared up in under a year.

Let's see a couple of teams lose their star player in the first five minutes of a league match because he couldn't keep his feet under him and see how quick they cut that crap out.

Yea, Cristiano Ronaldo, I'm looking at you, you pussy. You'd think the guy tears a ligament in his knee in every game with the way he writhes around on the ground in faux agony. Stop being a pussy. I broke a fracking rib in an indoor game years ago and only stayed on the ground for about 30 seconds while I caught my breath.

Had a buddy play through 75% of a game with a broken foot (he didn't even realize it was broken until much later that night).

We played for fun, surely you can man up a little more than us when you make millions to play the game.
 
2010-04-28 01:10:59 PM
Soccer.
 
2010-04-28 01:11:14 PM
MT Beer: They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?

Someone on the Red Wings (Darren Helm, I think) got a diving penalty last night. No fines or suspensions, to the best of my knowledge.

There's diving in hockey, but at least you don't get players writhing in pain for 7 seconds and then leaping up and being fine.
 
2010-04-28 01:13:24 PM
MT Beer: They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?

In hockey, it's a penalty. Detroit got hit with one last night. Not sure there's any suspension or fines behind it but don't think so.
 
2010-04-28 01:14:12 PM
Dafatone:

I had to finish reading the comments before i posted....
 
2010-04-28 01:16:00 PM
Russian Mob called for worst dive in MMA history against Aleks Emelianenko (Fedor's brother):

About 45 seconds in.
 
2010-04-28 01:18:39 PM
I do think the NHL tried out a "Diver" list for a season, but it seems it quietly went away. It's a shame, I thought it was one of the NHLs good ideas.
 
2010-04-28 01:20:07 PM
No...the best phantom punch was when Sonny Corleone was fighting Carlo
 
2010-04-28 01:20:35 PM
Yep, I'm also in favor of red carding dives.

Plus, sometimes they don't even grab the right body part when they're making grass angels
 
2010-04-28 01:21:39 PM
Bonanza Jellybean: Russian Mob called for worst dive in MMA history against Aleks Emelianenko (Fedor's brother):

About 45 seconds in.


And people wonder why Dana White keeps telling Fedor and his mob cohorts to fark off.
 
2010-04-28 01:25:35 PM
And people wonder why Americans hate soccer.
 
2010-04-28 01:26:20 PM
My favorite is when the soccer player dives after the linesman's flag brushes his head and the guy 2 feet away from him also dives. Love it.
 
2010-04-28 01:30:16 PM
Not quite up to the epic standards of Gila in a Champs Lge match ^ , but pretty funny
 
2010-04-28 01:33:10 PM
martissimo: Not quite up to the epic standards of Gila in a Champs Lge match ^ , but pretty funny

The commentator on that is pretty great. "He's fine there, and then the swallow dive. Disgraceful, really."
 
2010-04-28 01:39:16 PM
Spaced Cowboy: If refs would just start red carding the blatant dives like they are supposed to be doing, this shiat would be cleared up in under a year.

Let's see a couple of teams lose their star player in the first five minutes of a league match because he couldn't keep his feet under him and see how quick they cut that crap out.

Yea, Cristiano Ronaldo, I'm looking at you, you pussy. You'd think the guy tears a ligament in his knee in every game with the way he writhes around on the ground in faux agony. Stop being a pussy. I broke a fracking rib in an indoor game years ago and only stayed on the ground for about 30 seconds while I caught my breath.

Had a buddy play through 75% of a game with a broken foot (he didn't even realize it was broken until much later that night).

We played for fun, surely you can man up a little more than us when you make millions to play the game.


This.

I love soccer, but hate the acting. I always root against the teams that have a bunch of players that pull that crap, which means I always enjoy watching Italy, Spain, Portugal, and the whole of Central and South America lose during international play.
 
2010-04-28 01:41:00 PM
KingKauff: No...the best phantom punch was when Sonny Corleone was fighting Carlo

Gianni Russo got busted ribs from that scene. Must have been one helluva phantom punch.
 
2010-04-28 01:41:39 PM
Here's a wonderful compilation:

Why I can't watch soccer (new window)
 
2010-04-28 01:54:56 PM
toetag: MT Beer: They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?

In hockey, it's a penalty. Detroit got hit with one last night. Not sure there's any suspension or fines behind it but don't think so.


The league also reserves the right to review tape later and you can be fined if Bettman thinks you were a pussy. Most dives get called in the game and it's left at that, but if you escape the refs the tape can still get you later.
 
2010-04-28 01:56:20 PM
ha-ha-guy: toetag: MT Beer: They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?

In hockey, it's a penalty. Detroit got hit with one last night. Not sure there's any suspension or fines behind it but don't think so.

The league also reserves the right to review tape later and you can be fined if Bettman thinks you were a pussy. Most dives get called in the game and it's left at that, but if you escape the refs the tape can still get you later.


Your handle is quite fitting.
 
2010-04-28 01:57:57 PM
Lifeless: ha-ha-guy: toetag: MT Beer: They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?

In hockey, it's a penalty. Detroit got hit with one last night. Not sure there's any suspension or fines behind it but don't think so.

The league also reserves the right to review tape later and you can be fined if Bettman thinks you were a pussy. Most dives get called in the game and it's left at that, but if you escape the refs the tape can still get you later.

Your handle is quite fitting.


So what call are you bitter about?
 
2010-04-28 01:59:32 PM
The thing is, in Association Futbol, falling down near the opposing team's Star Player is one of the best strategies your non-star players can employ, especially if the referees are on the take, as that takes their best player completely out of the game. It's not merely dishonest, it's also sometimes a sure winning strategy. Between this, blatantly illegal goals that cannot be reviewed (hello handball) it's no wonder that Futbol is the 'beautiful game'.
 
2010-04-28 02:00:22 PM
None in particular, I'm a Sharks fan and farking thrilled they made it out of the first round. I'm just not so naive to think that the NHL has even a decent handle on diving.
 
2010-04-28 02:02:00 PM
GQueue: The Altidore "head butt" wasn't a lot more than that and the guy went down like he had been shot.

You have vid? I have been looking for it and it seems to be pulled.
 
2010-04-28 02:03:19 PM
hp6sa: Here's a wonderful compilation:

Why I can't watch soccer (new window)


My thursday night team, there are two team mates which your linked video looks just like them playing. They get upset when I call them on it and tell them to stop being twits. I can't even stand that crap from my own team mates.

Grew up watching international soccer. right around 1986, i stopped watching.
 
2010-04-28 02:03:26 PM
Just so we're clear, diving is a yellow card offense (Linky), though getting booked twice for it in a game would result in a red. Something has to be done though and it has to come from FIFA.
 
2010-04-28 02:05:15 PM
Some Beer Snob: Just so we're clear, diving is a yellow card offense (Linky), though getting booked twice for it in a game would result in a red. Something has to be done though and it has to come from FIFA.

I thought a very blatant dive could be an immediate red card, but I guess I was wrong. I was thinking they had raised the stakes on that a year or two ago in an attempt to clean the game up. Not sure where I got that idea from.
 
2010-04-28 02:06:02 PM
alonzinator: GQueue: The Altidore "head butt" wasn't a lot more than that and the guy went down like he had been shot.

You have vid? I have been looking for it and it seems to be pulled.


Isn't it included in hp6sa's linked video above?
 
2010-04-28 02:06:31 PM
Best reply on the video site -

"He went down faster than my stepsister during Fleet Week."
 
2010-04-28 02:06:44 PM
hp6sa: Here's a wonderful compilation:

Why I can't watch soccer (new window)


I love the soundtrack to that video...
 
2010-04-28 02:08:55 PM
Are you people all blind?!!!

That is no dive!

You can clearly see the guy jab his finger into the man's heart.

Obviously he hit him with the DIM MAK !

My prayers go out to the man's widow and family.
 
2010-04-28 02:09:37 PM
toetag: MT Beer: They should call out soccer players for diving and card/suspend more aggressively to get rid of it. In hockey I believe your name is listed and suspensions/fines ensue. Anyone confirm this?

In hockey, it's a penalty. Detroit got hit with one last night. Not sure there's any suspension or fines behind it but don't think so.


The biggest fine is to your reputation. Dive once or twice and you loose a lot of respect across the board (Sidney Crosby). Become known as a diver and you will find yourself unemployed once your contract runs out.

Every one is reviewed: (new window)

64.3 Fines and Suspensions - Regardless if a minor penalty for diving / embellishment is called, Hockey Operations will review game videos and assess fines to players or goalkeepers who dive or embellish a fall or a reaction, or who feign injury. See also Rule 29 - Supplementary Discipline. The call on the ice by the Referee is totally independent of supplementary discipline.

The first such incident during the season will result in a warning letter being sent to the player or goalkeeper. The second such incident will result in a one thousand dollar ($1,000) fine. For a third such incident in the season, the player shall be suspended for one game, pending a telephone conversation with the Director of Hockey Operations. For subsequent violations in the same season, the player's suspension shall double (i.e. first suspension - one game, second suspension - two games, third suspension - four games, etc.) See also Rule 29 - Supplementary Discipline.
 
2010-04-28 02:10:14 PM
www.verslo.is

Roy Keane frowns upon your diving shenanigans.
 
2010-04-28 02:10:24 PM
Approves...

www.lonepixel.com
 
2010-04-28 02:16:55 PM
marked for later.
 
2010-04-28 02:18:00 PM
 
2010-04-28 02:21:12 PM
Hmm. When I looked 2 days ago this (new window)wasn't there.

Jozy overreacted by getting up on the guy, but good lord...

In contrast. real athletes.(new window)
 
2010-04-28 02:31:22 PM
Even more desperate - diving in an attempt to get a fan sent off? (new window - and turn your volume down)
 
2010-04-28 02:34:04 PM
martissimo: Not quite up to the epic standards of Gila in a Champs Lge match ^ , but pretty funny

Best quote from that: "Fully deserves censure.... if not ridicule."

Clearly, that needs to become part of my repertoire.
 
paj
2010-04-28 02:39:26 PM
CL semifinal thread?
 
2010-04-28 02:41:27 PM
TonnageVT: Roy Keane frowns upon your diving shenanigans.


Roy Keane was a complete and utter scumbag. One of the dirtiest players the Prem has ever seen. Maybe one of the dirtiest players in all of sport.

A coward of mythic proportions. Just look at that picture. He is trying to actually end someone's career. The ball isn't even anywhere near either of them.

Classless asshole. Love to see him get hit by a bus.
 
2010-04-28 02:43:30 PM
paj: CL semifinal thread?

that's what i was thinking
 
2010-04-28 02:53:18 PM
nudave: martissimo: Not quite up to the epic standards of Gila in a Champs Lge match ^ , but pretty funny

Best quote from that: "Fully deserves censure.... if not ridicule."


To the Milan fans credit, the ridicule was fully given. The next match played at home in the San Siro the Milan fans jeered him mercilessly every time he touched the ball for that idiocy. Gave me a warm feeling in my heart
 
2010-04-28 02:57:28 PM
Remember this commercial? Good times...

Italian diving team (new window)
 
2010-04-28 03:02:34 PM
hp6sa: Here's a wonderful compilation:

Why I can't watch soccer (new window)


Awesome. The double headshot headbutts near the end were hilarious.
 
2010-04-28 03:13:38 PM
That guy in white is just very strong and an expert in Shaolin Soccer.
 
paj
2010-04-28 03:14:05 PM
Red card for that? What a farking dive.
 
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