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(Yahoo)   Why East Timor is way Cooler than the US: "Ninjas" are officially classified as a national security threat   (news.yahoo.com) divider line 50
    More: Cool, East Timor, declare war, military occupation, Santa Cruz, NGO, commandos, factions, Portuguese  
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7983 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Apr 2010 at 1:13 PM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2010-04-22 10:49:25 AM  
Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.
 
2010-04-22 10:51:02 AM  
show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.
 
2010-04-22 11:14:03 AM  
Like an octogenarian falling asleep mid-coitus on top of a back-alley prostitute, this headline and thread so far are the perfect convergence of tired and worn-out.
 
2010-04-22 11:28:16 AM  
What's the Dili?
 
2010-04-22 12:52:46 PM  
If we don't stop these ninjas there will be another environmental problem on our hands.

/meeting by the beer fountain
 
2010-04-22 01:14:25 PM  
Ninja please.
 
2010-04-22 01:15:32 PM  
Cagey B: Like an octogenarian falling asleep mid-coitus on top of a back-alley prostitute

Fapfapfapfap...

Keep going...
 
2010-04-22 01:16:09 PM  
East Timor doesn't have Chuck Norris defending their borders...
 
2010-04-22 01:18:08 PM  
I didn't realize we didn't classify them that way here. Don't we know what the purpose of a Ninja is?
 
2010-04-22 01:18:12 PM  
sounds like i wouldnt want to visit east timmuh. eh

/aboot
 
2010-04-22 01:18:21 PM  
jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.


I read that as "D.C. has the downs", which makes sense too.
 
2010-04-22 01:20:12 PM  
palelizard: jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.

I read that as "D.C. has the downs", which makes sense too.


[Palin_Joke]
 
2010-04-22 01:20:37 PM  
BadAnalogyGuy: I didn't realize we didn't classify them that way here. Don't we know what the purpose of a Ninja is?

well sure, but it's hard to classify something no one can see

/and Ninja Vs Spartan and Pirate vs Knight was all well and good, but how the hell could dealiest Warrior miss "Pirate vs. Ninja"?
 
2010-04-22 01:21:44 PM  
BadAnalogyGuy: I didn't realize we didn't classify them that way here. Don't we know what the purpose of a Ninja is?

To steal pies?
 
2010-04-22 01:24:45 PM  
STFU about Ninjas and Pirates already, JFC!
 
2010-04-22 01:25:27 PM  
jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.


And the midwest has the Insane Clowns.

i789.photobucket.com
 
2010-04-22 01:25:46 PM  
all-funny.info

They flip out, and kill people.
 
2010-04-22 01:26:59 PM  
ThreeEdgedSword: jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.

And the midwest has the Insane Clowns.


Insane Clown Pussy? I know her.
 
2010-04-22 01:27:36 PM  
Seriously, though, Ninjas or Pirates?
 
2010-04-22 01:27:52 PM  
Well, there was that one incident back in 2006...

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2010-04-22 01:30:27 PM  
well, we've got the Pittsburgh Pirates and mall ninjas.
 
2010-04-22 01:32:24 PM  
flatpickingmercantile.com
 
2010-04-22 01:32:36 PM  
loki see loki do: They flip out, and kill people.

This guy has the right idea. If you study martial arts, you will be able to take on and defeat several ninja at one time. I took out eight the other day.
 
2010-04-22 01:34:34 PM  
" It's still not uncommon, say researchers, for East Timorese to leave a glass of water outside their door, a knife bobbing within, to ward off the nocturnal ninja. "

Oh humanity, you're so... cute.
 
2010-04-22 01:37:55 PM  
The clowns in Washington are more frightening than ninjas, pirates, and bears holding sharks.

But not tyrannosaurs in F-16's.
 
2010-04-22 01:42:17 PM  
loki see loki do: But not tyrannosaurs in F-16's.

or an f-16 made of biceps

/power thirst!!
 
2010-04-22 01:42:47 PM  
Spartan Dave: well, we've got the Pittsburgh Pirates and mall ninjas.

Oh shiat, mall ninja... just being reminded of that asshat made me lol.
 
2010-04-22 01:43:59 PM  
farm4.static.flickr.com
 
2010-04-22 01:44:25 PM  
I've actually figured out a way to make myself immune to Ninja attacks.

You are all well aware of the inverse ninja law correct? Basically, the more ninjas there are, the less effective they are. The most deadly ninja is the lone ninja.

You CAN use this to your advantage. The key is to hire a large group of ninjas to stalk you and actually try to do you harm. This may seem counterintuitive, but since you are under threat of constant ninja attack, their numbers have all but rendered them helpless.

Why not have them guard you, you might ask. Well if they were guarding me, then a lone ninja could easily come in and wipe the floor with them. However, since they are actually against me, any lone ninja attack is lost in the group ninja attack. Thus the lone ninja attacking actually makes them less likely to succeed.

As you can tell by the fact that I'm alive to tell you this, no ninja has been able to overcome this unique defense. It's expensive, as the weaker ninjas of the group constantly need replacing, but you will have to agree that immunity from ninja attacks is well worth the cost.
 
2010-04-22 01:45:19 PM  
F***ing ninjas, how do they work?
 
2010-04-22 01:45:51 PM  
loki see loki do
2010-04-22 01:37:55 PM


The clowns in Washington are more frightening than ninjas, pirates, and bears holding sharks.

But not tyrannosaurs in F-16's.,


Clowns are the true power. Ask yourself, have you ever seen a clown get killed?
 
2010-04-22 01:46:56 PM  
library.thinkquest.org

There is at least six ninjas in this painting.
 
2010-04-22 01:48:29 PM  
YoungSwedishBlonde: F***ing ninjas, how do they work?

gizmodo.com
 
2010-04-22 01:51:41 PM  
TheWizard: I've actually figured out a way to make myself immune to Ninja attacks.

That is genius. Now, how do I hire them?
 
2010-04-22 01:55:51 PM  
dittybopper: ThreeEdgedSword: jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.

And the midwest has the Insane Clowns.

Insane Clown-Car Pussy? I know her.


You met Nadya Suleman?
 
2010-04-22 02:00:45 PM  
ThreeEdgedSword: jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.

And the midwest has the Insane Clowns.


F*cking ninjas. How do they work?
 
2010-04-22 02:02:10 PM  
NotOfThisWorld: Well, there was that one incident back in 2006...

I think thats the last Splinter Cell game I played.
 
2010-04-22 02:02:53 PM  
uncletogie: dittybopper: ThreeEdgedSword: jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.

And the midwest has the Insane Clowns.

Insane Clown-Car Pussy? I know her.

You met Nadya Suleman?


I lol'd
 
2010-04-22 02:13:43 PM  
 
2010-04-22 02:24:07 PM  
www.realultimatepower.net

//Ninjas are so sweet that I want to crap my pants
 
2010-04-22 02:46:23 PM  
What a ninja might look like.

pictures.topspeed.com
 
2010-04-22 03:02:44 PM  
Damnit, I just returned home from East Timor last week. I never saw any ninjas.
 
2010-04-22 03:14:23 PM  
drgeoffrey: Damnit, I just returned home from East Timor last week. I never saw any ninjas.

Yeah, well, that's how they operate.
 
2010-04-22 03:37:34 PM  
www.thetick.ws
 
2010-04-22 04:19:05 PM  
That's because East Timor learned from history what kind of threat Ninjas pose to your head of state

www.9-bits.com

/i'm bad
 
2010-04-22 05:30:16 PM  
The worst thing about ninjas is that if you see one, you can bet there are at least a thousand more.

Once they start laying eggs in the walls, you'll never get them out of your house.
 
2010-04-22 05:38:20 PM  
Ninjas are cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet.
 
2010-04-22 05:53:52 PM  
This is what I've been saying.
 
2010-04-22 09:09:02 PM  
So... "ninja" is East Timorese for "turrist"?
 
2010-04-23 12:05:40 AM  
jehovahs witness protection: show me: Yeah, but Somalia has the Pirates.

D.C. has the clowns.


over in 2
 
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