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(A desperate Farkette)   Farkette Jadefrog01 is 37-weeks pregnant and wants to know all of your homemade induction suggestions. Voting enabled   (pregnancy.about.com) divider line 282
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5997 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 May 2003 at 5:45 AM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-05-07 08:20:16 PM
Castor Oil (sp?)
Long walk (1 mile or so)
Sex (orgasm)
 
2003-05-07 08:29:17 PM
I've heard Mexican food does wonders..
 
2003-05-07 08:53:33 PM
For the day that you want to have the labor induced, find or plan 10 really important parties/meetings/etc. On the hour you want to go into labor, be at the grocery store halfway through a long line at the checkout with $100 worth of groceries and screaming children all around. Should do the trick.
 
2003-05-07 09:02:52 PM
twas sex that got me out
 
2003-05-07 09:17:07 PM
My sister has three kids and ate Mexican on the same day or day before all of them were born(weird I know). A vote for Ku_No_Ichi is a vote for Mexican food :-)
 
2003-05-07 09:27:45 PM
last thing you want to hear, but wait till the baby wants to come out. better for the baby, more annoying for you...
definitely take long walks, that's what did it for me.
 
2003-05-07 09:33:57 PM
My son was born at 28.5 weeks. Just be glad you're holding onto baby. Babies arrive on their schedule.

My son is 14 now. Spent 77 days in the hospital after he was born. Cost 250,000.00 Worth every penny
 
2003-05-07 09:44:35 PM
From what i hear, sex works great. It got you into this mess, it might as well get you out.
My wife is at 31 weeks so i'll be trying that soon. If she lets me that is.
 
2003-05-07 10:30:03 PM
Mexican Food! (but it has to be decent, Taco Bell doesn't count).

Worked twice.
 
2003-05-07 10:40:14 PM
Orgasam and relax.
 
2003-05-07 10:40:56 PM
I used castor oil - about a spoonful - in a glass of orange juice about once every two hours on the day i wanted it to end (at 38 weeks!). It may throw your bowels into turmoil but it gets the thing started, too.
 
2003-05-07 11:05:42 PM
A good burp ought to do the trick...
 
2003-05-07 11:30:39 PM
Don't you still have about 3 weeks?
In any case, when I was 41 weeks pregant and overdue, I tried pizza with lots of hot peppers, Mexican food, sex... you name it. I ended up being induced.
The second time, same stuff, ended up being induced again.
I personally wouldn't want to try castor oil. Apart from tasting like rotted fish, who wants diarrhea and an upset tummy during labor? it's hard enough as it is.
In any case: Good Luck!
 
2003-05-07 11:42:33 PM
From my experience, nothing works -- babies will come out when they damn well pleases.

Mexican/spicy food -- forget it. You don't want anything burning after giving birth.
 
2003-05-08 12:32:49 AM
I prefer a toroid shaped iron core with a 10 to 1 turn ratio with the wires using a standard 60 Hz ac outlet.
 
2003-05-08 01:21:43 AM
It's really quite simple actually. First off, try to find a neutral/comfort area in your house, best would be a sofa or recliner. Then put on a soothing native american CD, or something instrumental and relaxing. If you can almost fall asleep listening to it, it's perfect. A nice cup of tea might help, and rub your temples in a calm manner while thinking of how wondrous it is to bring a new life into this world (Perhaps consider how your child's life might ideally turn out, to pass the time with smiles). Then stick three of your fingers up your ass before you can second-guess, that ought to work.

/name it "Drewsfault"
 
2003-05-08 01:43:43 AM
Unless your body is ready, nothing will work. However, if you are past 39 wks. and you really want to try it, castor oil gets things moving and won't do much harm. I wouldn't recommend taking it every two hours as suggested above. Ask your nurse/midwife what she recommends.
 
2003-05-08 05:47:53 AM
I weighed 13 3/4 lbs at birth and I was out in a few minutes my mother attributes it to Castor Oil.
 
2003-05-08 05:50:57 AM
oh and if the castor oil doesn't work you could always try this:
 
2003-05-08 05:51:15 AM
1) Spoon it out.
2) Sit infront of your computer while at www.fark.com with legs spread. Boobies will draw boys out, weeners for girls.
 
2003-05-08 05:52:53 AM


2nd try
 
2003-05-08 05:54:31 AM
my mom went to baskin robbins and had a prailenes and cream sunday, or something similar, before i came out and before my sister came out two years later. didn't work with my brother, though, but he came out ten years after that.
 
2003-05-08 05:59:24 AM
Spoofman_v2.0, you heterosexist. What if she has a homosexual child?

And my suggestion is to have sex. If it doesn't work, hey, at least you'll be getting fvcked.
 
2003-05-08 06:01:30 AM
A lot of people try to go straight for the base case, but it's often easier if you focus on what you're inducting on and regress.

/math geek
 
2003-05-08 06:01:47 AM
You put your right leg in.
You put your right leg out.
You put your right leg in, and the baby should come out.
 
2003-05-08 06:02:27 AM
Lay in the back of an old pick-up truck and have someone drive real fast down a bumpy country road :)
 
2003-05-08 06:03:14 AM
At 42.5 weeks, I tried castor oil, sex, and the walking thing (not all at once). Nothing worked. They still had to induce me. Just let nature take its course and enjoy the quiet before your bundle of joy arrives. Really.
 
2003-05-08 06:04:36 AM
Because homosexuality is a terrible terrible disease.

/ignorant

Actually I did not consider that point. Thanks for the correction.

/humble
 
2003-05-08 06:05:10 AM
Try rolling down a flight of stairs.
 
2003-05-08 06:07:27 AM
Castor Oil (sp?)
Long walk (1 mile or so)
Sex (orgasm)


Sex? Who has the money for that? I know I'm not banging a 37 week prego eww!
 
2003-05-08 06:08:10 AM
Daughter #1 was 7 days overdue, mother-to-be was late for appointment at doctors to discuss details of induction. Fast walk / half jog across town for 2 miles ensued. 6 hours later labour started.

Friend had much the same problem, went mountain biking, gave birth next day.

Midwife recommended hot sex and hot curry, but nothing happened. Try vigorous exercise.
 
2003-05-08 06:08:59 AM
1) Begin commenting on whatever war/politics/religious related subject comes up in Fark today and take a strong stance on one side or the other.

2) Come back a few minutes later to read all the personal insults hurled at you. Try and remain calm.

3) Reply to each and every one of them to re-explain your stance.

Repeat steps 2 and 3 until your water breaks. It may help to hurl a few insults yourself in the beginning to get the system working properly. At least it does for me.
 
2003-05-08 06:09:24 AM
Potocin...lots of potocin.
 
2003-05-08 06:10:22 AM
Sex
 
2003-05-08 06:10:36 AM

Ride an elevator with any hollywood action star. Even more effective when there is a bomb. Somewhere.

Or, when your babies daddy is driving home drunk/speeding/whatever... Just be sure you are IN LABOUR when the cop comes to the window, becausehe can then legally drive like The Dukes of Hazzard. Be sure to film it for us ;)

 
2003-05-08 06:11:26 AM
 
2003-05-08 06:11:55 AM
Ride an elevator with any hollywood action star. Even more effective when there is a bomb. Somewhere.
Or, when your babies daddy is driving home drunk/speeding/whatever... Just be sure you are IN LABOUR when the cop comes to the window, becausehe can then legally drive like The Dukes of Hazzard. Be sure to film it for us ;)

Now vote friendly. (if you swing that way)
 
2003-05-08 06:13:24 AM
wait where do you put the Castor Oil
 
2003-05-08 06:13:37 AM
I really, really recommend not doing the castor oil thing. I've heard great things, but I've also heard horror stories. This child will come out when it's ready, not when you've had enough. It's just the beginning of kids being stubborn, trust me.

If you really are getting driven up the walls by chronic pain or pesky braxton hicks, talk to your doctor about inducing in the hospital. If you do plan on inducing, do it in the hospital. When you induce, likelyhood of complications goes up.
 
2003-05-08 06:17:24 AM
My wife just had a baby. None of these things (Mexican food, exercise, sex) work. We tried.

Get your hands on some pitocin. That'll do it.
 
2003-05-08 06:18:09 AM
my wife went to 42 weeks both times, our first had to be induced but our son came rather quickly (2.5 hours labor). My wife walked and walked and walked. We were on a first name basis with security guards at the mall. Walking is the best thing you can do to get things moving along.

If that doesn't work, just get on a trampoline ;)
 
2003-05-08 06:19:08 AM
A good punch to the stomach should work.

/Bob Ryan
 
2003-05-08 06:20:56 AM
Wait.

These are your last moments of peace and quiet for the next 18 years (at least). Enjoy them while they last.
 
2003-05-08 06:21:33 AM
When all else fails, do what Tom Servo suggested in "The Chicken of Tommorrow"...

NARRATOR: And now it's time to hatch.
TOM SERVO: Sticks of dynamite are carefully placed around the perimeter...
 
2003-05-08 06:24:34 AM
Sex. Frustrating sex.
The night before my daughter was born, my wife and I had a bit of a wild night. Not 12 hours later, her water broke (3 weeks early!)
 
2003-05-08 06:25:43 AM
I've got the cookies,
You've got the milk.

*enaz puts on the barry white

Let me hit it twice ... before the kid needs braces.

/romantic
 
2003-05-08 06:25:52 AM
Don't rush it - the last few weeks are uncomfortable and I know you want to get the show on the road - but just try and relax, the baby will come when it's ready.

so have frequent sex and naps now - you won't want sex after and you won't be able to nap

congrats!
 
2003-05-08 06:27:37 AM
Jumping jacks on my count..

Ready?

1, and 2, and 3....
 
2003-05-08 06:30:14 AM
 
2003-05-08 06:30:23 AM
Get one of those guys who can yank a tablecloth out from under a lot of dishes, have him grab you by the shoulders, and yank you from around your baby. Just have someone there with a catcher's mitt, you don't want the umbilical to bungee the little bundle of joy back up in ya.
 
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