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(GoMemphis)   Thief strikes town, stealing trees and shrubbery. Saying "ni" reportedly insufficient to prevent further thefts   (gomemphis.com) divider line 90
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3838 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 May 2003 at 2:06 PM (10 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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HPZ [TotalFark]
2003-05-06 10:27:20 AM
Noo! Noo!
 
2003-05-06 02:07:49 PM
THEN... Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher, so we get the two-level effect with a little path running down the middle.
 
2003-05-06 02:09:14 PM


exactly.
 
2003-05-06 02:09:32 PM
Hahahahahahahaha.... that was a great headline!
 
2003-05-06 02:09:56 PM
Stealing trees and shrubs is OK, but don't steal my bush
 
2003-05-06 02:10:01 PM
Sounds like a the phantom landscaper.
 
2003-05-06 02:10:56 PM
I wonder if the trees were cut down with........a Herring!!!
 
2003-05-06 02:12:13 PM
Maaan, I was just talking to my friend about stealing some tree's, too.

I want some trees for my property, but the damn things are expensive. Sometimes they are like 50-60 bucks for something that is only 4 feet tall.

I used to know a guy named vinnie, and his trashy itialian family was a pack of theives. Every spring they would hit the parking lots of kmarts and target stores and steal the freshly planted ornimental tree's and flowers that landscapers just put in. threw it in their truck and took it home to plant in their own yard.
 
2003-05-06 02:12:18 PM
We are now the Knights who say... "Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG! Zoom-Boing! Z'nourrwringmm."
 
2003-05-06 02:13:03 PM
Let's see how many Python references we can get in this thread.

What about pointed sticks?
 
2003-05-06 02:13:03 PM
Maybe it's all the geese pissed off at getting kicked out each day.
 
2003-05-06 02:13:14 PM
The Knight of Ni dont steal bushes. They have people offer them up in sacrifice and/or toll! The Knights of Ni, like Napster, only provide the oportunity to download copyrighted music/steal landscaping.
 
2003-05-06 02:13:18 PM
Mortisthecat: You beat me to it.

Only dirty holes remained.

Maybe they were blown out of the ground with the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch?
 
2003-05-06 02:13:54 PM
I just got the cat neutered, now it's American.
 
2003-05-06 02:14:06 PM
I grew up in Virginia, where dogwood is the state tree. I don't live there now, so I can say with impunity:

Take them! Steal them! Dogwoods are ugly trees with ugly flowers and no fruit. So there!
 
2003-05-06 02:15:12 PM
Whatever happened to Drew's garden gnome?
 
2003-05-06 02:16:05 PM
Dogwood trees (with beautiful white, yellow, or pink flowers in the spring) run about $100 for a 5-6' tree. A Japanese maple is even more. This is more than petty theft, but damn, how are you going to catch someone doing this?

Best way maybe, is for cops to look out for trucks with trees/shrubs in the back, driving around late at night. Who does landscaping in the dark?
 
2003-05-06 02:16:25 PM
I wonder if the person stealing the trees is really a crackhead.. . and he thinks that his dealer will give him crack in exchange for trees or foliage. Hmmmm. . ..Dogwood for a rock? What a deal!
 
2003-05-06 02:17:01 PM
A search of police reports showed numerous incidents of people having trees, bushes and plants stolen, right from their homes. (In another bit of Python-esque humor, one of the police reports refers to a stolen hibiscus as "high biscuits").

damn, it was a slow day in the cop house wasn't it?
 
2003-05-06 02:17:13 PM
We eat ham and jam and spam alot!

I have to push the pramalottttttttttt
 
2003-05-06 02:17:36 PM
I like stealing bush from time to time, too.
 
2003-05-06 02:17:42 PM
Tree Theif's Mum: 'Ere! Wot are all these trees doing here?
Tree Theif: They just...popped by.
TTM: Popped by? Swarmed by, more like it.
 
2003-05-06 02:19:48 PM
Check with Roger - the shrubber.

"These are dark times indeed"
 
2003-05-06 02:20:42 PM
I know we have a Roger the Shrubber in here....I'd like to know where he was during all this.
 
2003-05-06 02:21:18 PM
However the other sacred words,'Ni', 'Peng', and 'Neee-wom'! DID manage to keep crime lower, at least in the suburbs...

 
2003-05-06 02:22:02 PM
Maybe it was the Spanish Inquisition. Cuz, you know, nobody ever expects them.

 
2003-05-06 02:24:44 PM
"bring out your dead"
/python quote (with no relevance to the article)
 
2003-05-06 02:26:03 PM
Happy Motha's Day, I got ya dem der purrdy trees!!
 
2003-05-06 02:26:14 PM
Wouldn't you have to say it to stop them?

But as Cleckmoon pointed out, they only give the order for a shrubbery to be procured; but by saying it, they would be so tortured that the order would never be given.

Of course, I may be thinking a little too deeply about a goddamn headline.
 
2003-05-06 02:27:47 PM
BEDEVERE: What makes you think she is a witch?
VILLAGER #3: Well, she turned me into a newt.
BEDEVERE: A newt?
VILLAGER #3: I got better.

/python
 
2003-05-06 02:28:05 PM
My attempt to italicize "it" has failed. I have dishonored my family--goodbye world.
 
2003-05-06 02:29:31 PM
"What do you think I'm am doing wiz zeees ree-deek-u-lous French accent?"
 
2003-05-06 02:33:27 PM


Police are believed to looking for this man


/Got zip
 
2003-05-06 02:33:30 PM
"My hovercraft is full of eels."

Not a Holy Grail reference, but Python nonetheless.

Well, they could be using the trees to beautify.. the Castle Anthrax!
 
2003-05-06 02:34:22 PM
"Bring out yer dead. Bring out yer dead."

/another Python reference not relevant to this post
 
2003-05-06 02:35:00 PM
Uh oh. All the Python nerds are out in full force...batten down the hatches. Just kidding...right there with you all.
 
2003-05-06 02:35:35 PM
Vikings and spam reference in 3...2...1...
 
Ant
2003-05-06 02:37:00 PM
"Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government! Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony!"
 
2003-05-06 02:38:02 PM
That article didn't say a thing about "ni."

/yo tengo nada tambien
 
2003-05-06 02:38:54 PM
No offense but do we really need the "/python" tags? People in this thread that don't know lines like "bring out your dead" and "she turned me into a newt." are probably just Nerd Wannabes.
 
2003-05-06 02:39:30 PM
"I'd like to see John the Baptist's impersonation of Graham Hill."

Best.Episode.Ever

"And now here's Cardinal Richelieu's imprersonation of Petula Clark"
 
2003-05-06 02:40:26 PM
/pythonpolice on

"Ni" was the word that allowed tree robbery - "It" was the word to stop tree robbery.

/pythonpolice off

This anal retentive moment brought to you my Wizards of the Coast, a subsidiary of Hasbro:

 
2003-05-06 02:41:02 PM
"....tattooed on the back of their necks..."
 
2003-05-06 02:43:26 PM
best article ever.

the monty python bits in a serious article just made my day.
 
2003-05-06 02:44:48 PM
Help, help, I'm being repressed!

...bestest.comedy.ever...

Well, there's The Life of Brian, heathen humour at it's best.
 
2003-05-06 02:46:48 PM
NICU8697, you're just jellous that I've got a grant to develop my silly walk!

Jeez, it's time to rewatch my Python DVDs again.

- Ninja "Two Sheds" Pancakes
 
2003-05-06 02:47:15 PM
Come and see the violence inherent in the system!

*okay, I'm done now*
 
2003-05-06 02:49:40 PM
Ant:
--
Dennis, the Anarcho-Syndicalist Briton:

"Listen -- strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcial aquatic ceremony. You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you! I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor just 'cause some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!"
--

The moistened bint part cracks me up every time. Great stuff.
 
2003-05-06 02:52:31 PM
And now for something completely different:
A man with three buttocks.
 
2003-05-06 02:54:49 PM
Dinnsdale!
 
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