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(The Scottish Sun)   WWE commentator Jim Ross says that he'll probably never announce another wrestling match. BAH GAWD, KING, THAT MAN HAS A FAMILY   (thescottishsun.co.uk) divider line 155
    More: Sad, WWE, Jim Ross, commentators, PPV, main event, wrestlers, god  
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4701 clicks; posted to Sports » on 02 Apr 2010 at 6:44 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-04-02 11:20:22 AM  
DeathByGeekSquad: King Something: /it's called WWE now
//apparently, those tree-huggers convinced a judge that people can't tell the difference between pandas and wrestlers

The only appropriate course of action would be to infiltrate the hippy drum circle, steal the leaders friends, defeat their purpose, and sleep with his girlfriend.


img1.tvloop.com

Can offer advice
 
2010-04-02 11:21:36 AM  
FreakinB: DeathByGeekSquad: King Something: /it's called WWE now
//apparently, those tree-huggers convinced a judge that people can't tell the difference between pandas and wrestlers

The only appropriate course of action would be to infiltrate the hippy drum circle, steal the leaders friends, defeat their purpose, and sleep with his girlfriend.



Can offer advice


Damn. Wrong pic. My bad.
 
2010-04-02 11:26:00 AM  
Came for:
"STONE COLD!

STONE COLD!

STONE COLD!"

and am leaving satisfied.

/Also I'll leave this (new window) here.
 
2010-04-02 11:29:50 AM  
FreakinB: DeathByGeekSquad: King Something: /it's called WWE now
//apparently, those tree-huggers convinced a judge that people can't tell the difference between pandas and wrestlers

The only appropriate course of action would be to infiltrate the hippy drum circle, steal the leaders friends, defeat their purpose, and sleep with his girlfriend.



Can offer advice


Black choppas and paraquat. Its the only way to be sure
 
2010-04-02 11:31:50 AM  
tequilasundae: Anyone else seen Johnathan Coachman.(Coach) on ESPN news?? he's a natural turrible, just turrible

FTFY
 
2010-04-02 11:39:54 AM  
Haven't watched wrestling in maybe a decade but I have some fond memories.

Also, absolute perfection.
i5.photobucket.com
 
2010-04-02 11:48:04 AM  
generaltimmy: Is this the long awaited Wrestlemania thread? This should be in ShowbMiz

FTFY
 
2010-04-02 11:49:14 AM  
JR has a BBQ place here in Oklahoma. It's not bad. I've never been hit with a steel chair while eating there though.
 
2010-04-02 11:50:05 AM  
Rickenbacker: What, no love for Tony Schiavone? HA!

I miss JR. OH MAH GAWD! HE'S BEATIN' HIM LIKE A GOVERNMENT MULE! HE'S CRAZIER THAN A PET RACCOON!


That's two-thirds of J.R.'s animal trifecta. What was the third? I can't remember.

/HE'S BEING BEATEN LIKE A REDHEADED STEPCHILD!
//STEEL CHAIR!
///STEEL CHAIR!
////STEEL CHAIR!
 
2010-04-02 11:54:31 AM  
Mentat: JR has a BBQ place here in Oklahoma. It's not bad. I've never been hit with a steel chair while eating there though.

Used to have a second place in Moore, but it's been replaced. Just as well I guess, since it was relatively close to the one in Norman already. I guess they were looking to do a slow expansion, but they probably would have been better off to stick it someplace further away.
 
2010-04-02 11:56:18 AM  
The Dreaded Rear Admiral: Rickenbacker: What, no love for Tony Schiavone? HA!

I miss JR. OH MAH GAWD! HE'S BEATIN' HIM LIKE A GOVERNMENT MULE! HE'S CRAZIER THAN A PET RACCOON!

That's two-thirds of J.R.'s animal trifecta. What was the third? I can't remember.

/HE'S BEING BEATEN LIKE A REDHEADED STEPCHILD!
//STEEL CHAIR!
///STEEL CHAIR!
////STEEL CHAIR!


I'm pretty sure he used "scalded dog" as well.
 
2010-04-02 12:01:23 PM  
Bless you wrestling commenator, for announcing all my favorite wrestling moments.
 
2010-04-02 12:03:42 PM  
The current announce team without JR is a bowling shoe.
 
2010-04-02 12:10:10 PM  
without fear of losing his job, maybe now he can speak his mind about the "Esteemed Chairman" Mr. McMahon
"Please Edge, Don't do this!"
"Mah Gawd! He's picking the bones!!"
"That snake in the grass,Ohh I don't like him"
"Conchairto! Conchairto! Mah Gawd, He's broken in half!!!
"Barnburner", "Slobberknocker" etc.
 
2010-04-02 12:12:53 PM  
GoteamVenture: i think i cried when i saw "the rockers" break up.

I KNOW I cried when the Road Warriors turned on Sting in NWA, also happens to be the day my dad explain what I was watching.
OHHHH WHAT A RUSH
 
2010-04-02 12:36:25 PM  
AS GOD AS MY WITNESS, HE IS BROKEN IN HALF!
 
2010-04-02 12:41:57 PM  
BAH GOD THATS GOTTA BE AT LEAST 50 FEET!
 
2010-04-02 12:43:22 PM  
Hopefully now he can focus on his rap career (new window)
 
2010-04-02 12:47:43 PM  
ihatedumbpeople: phedex: just watched WM26 last night, Shawn Michaels retiring is pretty sad to me. when I was 8-9 years old, me and this other kid would run around the playground pretending to be the rockers. Of course I was marty jannety, but still. HBK has been entertaining me since I first turned on a wrestling match.

either way though, I'm glad he's hanging up the boots now and keeping his dignity.

/unlike some people in the wrestling universe

I remember when he super-kicked Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake through the glass window on the "Barber Shop" skit thing. that ruled.


That was Marty Janetty that he Super Kicked, thus marking his heel turn.
 
2010-04-02 12:51:53 PM  
DiamondDave: ihatedumbpeople: phedex: just watched WM26 last night, Shawn Michaels retiring is pretty sad to me. when I was 8-9 years old, me and this other kid would run around the playground pretending to be the rockers. Of course I was marty jannety, but still. HBK has been entertaining me since I first turned on a wrestling match.

either way though, I'm glad he's hanging up the boots now and keeping his dignity.

/unlike some people in the wrestling universe

I remember when he super-kicked Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake through the glass window on the "Barber Shop" skit thing. that ruled.

That was Marty Janetty that he Super Kicked, thus marking his heel turn.


come on dude, like 80 of us have already corrected the guy.

---
favorite unsubstantiated rumor from my childhood:

"The ultimate warrior is dead, thats kerry von erich in warrior facepaint"
 
2010-04-02 12:59:02 PM  
This is very sad news because Michael Cole is god awful
 
2010-04-02 01:03:56 PM  
As a 26 year old man who has watched wrestling my entire life, this makes me sad.

Probably the only scripted moments that made me close to crying is the Ultimate Warrior being locked in a casket by the Undertaker (I thought he actually died,) and Shawn Michael's "collapse" after Owen gave him that inzeguri (spelling??)
 
2010-04-02 01:04:34 PM  
JuicePats: The current announce team without JR is a bowling shoe.

And yet, the WWE has Joey Styles buried in the back room.


/with a cheese grater
 
2010-04-02 01:06:19 PM  
The guy who saved Wrestlemania:
www.tabloidprodigy.com
 
2010-04-02 01:19:42 PM  
tagjim: The guy who saved Wrestlemania:

Here's what The Sports Guy thinks of that.
 
2010-04-02 01:20:01 PM  
phedex: just watched WM26 last night, Shawn Michaels retiring is pretty sad to me. when I was 8-9 years old, me and this other kid would run around the playground pretending to be the rockers. Of course I was marty jannety, but still. HBK has been entertaining me since I first turned on a wrestling match.

either way though, I'm glad he's hanging up the boots now and keeping his dignity.

/unlike some people in the wrestling universe


cause this is only his 38th retirement. Must have an injury/rehab to tend to
 
2010-04-02 01:20:28 PM  
tagjim: The guy who saved Wrestlemania:

who the hell is that guy? He looks like IRS but less intimidating.

i weep for the tarnished name of ecw.

Again with the rockers..most underrated tag team ever? And was Marty Jannetty's finisher the same as the Macho Mans?
 
2010-04-02 01:30:15 PM  
generaltimmy:
cause this is only his 38th retirement. Must have an injury/rehab to tend to


I only remember him retiring once in 1998, and he was legit gone for over four years. When were the 37 others?
 
2010-04-02 01:33:32 PM  
generaltimmy: phedex: just watched WM26 last night, Shawn Michaels retiring is pretty sad to me. when I was 8-9 years old, me and this other kid would run around the playground pretending to be the rockers. Of course I was marty jannety, but still. HBK has been entertaining me since I first turned on a wrestling match.

either way though, I'm glad he's hanging up the boots now and keeping his dignity.

/unlike some people in the wrestling universe

cause this is only his 38th retirement. Must have an injury/rehab to tend to


yeah dude, but gotta face the facts. he's 44, and if theres ever a time that you should retire before your body is seriously wrecked, its before 50. This isnt like back in the 90's, when obviously it wasnt an actual retirement... While he didnt rule it out in his speech, I don't see him getting back in the ring.
 
2010-04-02 01:36:04 PM  
Mentat 2010-04-02 01:19:42 PM
tagjim: The guy who saved Wrestlemania:

Here's what The Sports Guy thinks of that.


That article is full of fail.
 
2010-04-02 01:39:26 PM  
GoteamVenture: tagjim: The guy who saved Wrestlemania:

who the hell is that guy? He looks like IRS but less intimidating.

i weep for the tarnished name of ecw.

Again with the rockers..most underrated tag team ever? And was Marty Jannetty's finisher the same as the Macho Mans?


That would be Matt Striker. Former schoolteacher turned jobber wrestler turned commentator. He was on ECW (where I really liked him) and is now on Smackdown. I don't like him as much on Smackdown, mainly because I hate Todd Grisham as much as Michael Cole. I do agree though, Matt Striker is definitely more entertaining than King or Cole.

I miss ECW already, WWE NXT is just wretched.

The Rocker's finisher was a suplex by Shawn Michaels while Marty Jannetty does a diving crossbody
 
2010-04-02 01:43:54 PM  
cycoivan: GoteamVenture: tagjim: The guy who saved Wrestlemania:

who the hell is that guy? He looks like IRS but less intimidating.

i weep for the tarnished name of ecw.

Again with the rockers..most underrated tag team ever? And was Marty Jannetty's finisher the same as the Macho Mans?

That would be Matt Striker. Former schoolteacher turned jobber wrestler turned commentator. He was on ECW (where I really liked him) and is now on Smackdown. I don't like him as much on Smackdown, mainly because I hate Todd Grisham as much as Michael Cole. I do agree though, Matt Striker is definitely more entertaining than King or Cole.

I miss ECW already, WWE NXT is just wretched.

The Rocker's finisher was a suplex by Shawn Michaels while Marty Jannetty does a diving crossbody


i need a wwe video game to recreate the rockers awesomeness. Are those games any good?
 
2010-04-02 01:55:27 PM  
The Big Show and The Miz (carrying two belts apiece, for some reason)

If you watch wrestling, you know why at least.

Cole tries to claim that Big Show is 486 pounds and seven feet tall. All wrestling heights/weights get bumped by 14.3 percent. It's just the rule.

He is that big.

WWE pipes in fake booing This ain't WCW

a young wrestler who can't quite reach his considerable potential In reference to Orton - WTF?

Next up: A 10-man "Money In The Bank" ladder match (basically, a battle royal with ladders and a suitcase full of money dangling 20 feet above the ring) ITS A farkING TITLE SHOT NOT MONEY

Jack Swagger (this generation's flag-waving Hacksaw Jim Duggan) HAHAHA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I hate that there's a WWE title, a World Heavyweight Championship AND an Intercontinental title. No US title love?

Cena referred to Batista by his first name. You want to guess it? What's weird about that?

Our storyline: Batista (a tattooed, muscular, brooding bully) has held the WWE belt for much of the past five years, but Cena gets more attention and gets paid to make bad action movies. And now Batista is jealous. Or something. CENA has held the belt much more in the last 5 years than Batista

Was it a good idea to have a title change hands on a tapout in a stadium with 72,000 people in it when most of those people can barely see the ring? I give up
 
2010-04-02 02:03:37 PM  
phedex:
favorite unsubstantiated rumor from my childhood:

"The ultimate warrior is dead, thats kerry von erich in warrior facepaint"


No, actually, Jim Hellwig died and he was replaced by Steve DiSalvo.

/r.s.p-w. represent
 
2010-04-02 02:12:22 PM  
It's a damn shame.

Sure, I got kinda tired of hearing him blather on endlessly about Stone Cold, but he's been announcing since the early 80s.

The very least he deserves is a final match as an announcer. Give the man the farewell he's due after so many years in his profession.
 
2010-04-02 02:33:52 PM  
phedex: either way though, I'm glad he's hanging up the boots now and keeping his dignity.

/unlike some people in the wrestling universe


With Flair's money management skills, he may never be able to retire.

Sknyluv: Explains the stroke I suppose. Good commentator though, he'll be missed.

Bell's Palsy. Most likely (yet they still can't say with 100% certainty) that it's genetic. The smoking wouldn't have anything to do with it.

Rickenbacker: What, no love for Tony Schiavone? HA!

I always liked Tony. He was a better announcer than people will give him credit for. All anyone seems to remember is the final couple years of WCW when he put everything over like it was the greatest match ever. As if he had a choice! You can't have Shawn Stasiak vs David Flair and be honest while calling the match. "This sucks. If I were you, I'd turn to Raw." Just like Mick Foley quit WWE because he was tired of McMahon yelling at him thru the earpiece to change his announcing style, Schiavone undoubtedly had people yelling at him to hype the shiat out of the match. The fact that he stayed with the company until the bitter end showed how loyal an employee he was. He deserves better than to be a footnote in announcing history.

.
.
.

And now, since I'm contractually obligated to post it in every wrestling thread...

i205.photobucket.com
 
2010-04-02 02:43:55 PM  
jake3988: There hasn't been a star made in the last 10 years except for Randy Orton and John Cena

And Edge, Rey Jr., Batista, Chris Jericho, and throw in Jeff Hardy and Brock Lesnar even though they're not in WWE anymore.

/10 years is a long time
 
2010-04-02 02:53:22 PM  
cycoivan:

The Rocker's finisher was a suplex by Shawn Michaels while Marty Jannetty does a diving crossbody


AKA the Rockerplex. Shawn was kind of a douche back then but Marty was extremely cool, we hung out a few times. JR was always nice too. The late eighties/early nineties were a great time to be a WWF fan, I had a lot of fun going to shows and hanging out afterwards. I haven't watched in years; the last time I did JR was looking kind of disgusted about what was going on.

/OH MY GOD!
 
2010-04-02 02:54:50 PM  
HE'S STOMPING A MUDHOLE IN HIM
AND WALKIN IT DRY
 
2010-04-02 03:00:10 PM  
The best part about the Bill Simmons article was this part

"R-Truth came out prancing and singing his hit song, "What's Up?" The lyrics go like this: "Shshshn cnbcnsbdb fhdehsh fhdhs dhdhan dbdjdndjd dbdbdbdbdb shshsnhs ffrhdhhjs xbcxbbffgfhhj WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP?""

Hilarious! Also he was dead on about Matt Striker, the guy is absolutely terrible. That was the 1st time I was exposed to him. Hell the whole announce team was awful, especially during the MITB match. "OOHHHHH!!! OOOHHHH! OOOHHHHH!" Riveting commentary.

Also for those crapping on the Sports Guy, he admits that he really hasn't followed wrestling much recently, cut him some slack. Hell I didn't even know Dolf Ziggler was still in the WWE and wrestled, last I watched he just introduced himself backstage. Any wrestling fan no matter how hardcore or casual you are tunes into Wrestlemania.

Oh and back to the commentary, they so need a true heel mic guy. Last really good heel announcer was Paul Heyman.
 
2010-04-02 03:04:16 PM  
cycoivan: GoteamVenture:

Again with the rockers..most underrated tag team ever? And was Marty Jannetty's finisher the same as the Macho Mans?

The Rocker's finisher was a suplex by Shawn Michaels while Marty Jannetty does a diving crossbody


Yeah, they did a double finisher as The Rockers. When Marty was running solo he'd often finish with the Rocker Dropper, which was a leg over the back of the head drop (predecessor of Billy Gunn's Fame-Asser).
 
2010-04-02 03:06:36 PM  
Dumb-Ass-Monkey: It's a damn shame.

Sure, I got kinda tired of hearing him blather on endlessly about Stone Cold, but he's been announcing since the early 80s.

The very least he deserves is a final match as an announcer. Give the man the farewell he's due after so many years in his profession.


He was requested by multiple people, including Michaels, Taker, and Hart, to do Wrestlemania. McMahon decided not to, simply because the new folks will have to sink or swim and not go back all the time and grab Ross again.

So Wrestlemania basically saw 4 people taken off the canvas: Michaels, Hart, "Mr. McMahon", and Ross.

/The Hart beating was to write McMahon off once and for all.
//since the character began with Hart after all.
 
2010-04-02 03:27:24 PM  
King Something: The_Sponge: jevman:
/Haven't watched the WWF in a long time.
//Still, this is sad news.

/it's called WWE now
//apparently, those tree-huggers convinced a judge that people can't tell the difference between pandas and wrestlers


img444.imageshack.us
 
2010-04-02 03:34:34 PM  
wantedbadass: jake3988: There hasn't been a star made in the last 10 years except for Randy Orton and John Cena

And Edge, Rey Jr., Batista, Chris Jericho, and throw in Jeff Hardy and Brock Lesnar even though they're not in WWE anymore.

/10 years is a long time


With the exception of batista and lesnar, all of those guys have been around more than 10 years. Lesnar didn't stick it out. I'll give you batista though.
 
2010-04-02 03:57:38 PM  
buckeyebrain: Jim Hellwig died and he was replaced by Steve DiSalvo.

hes still alive. its a common misconception. he's a lawyer now in Florida i believe
 
2010-04-02 04:23:15 PM  
wantedbadass: jake3988: There hasn't been a star made in the last 10 years except for Randy Orton and John Cena

And Edge, Rey Jr., Batista, Chris Jericho, and throw in Jeff Hardy and Brock Lesnar even though they're not in WWE anymore.

/10 years is a long time


and The Rock and Triple H
 
2010-04-02 04:44:43 PM  
TheRevHairless: wantedbadass: jake3988: There hasn't been a star made in the last 10 years except for Randy Orton and John Cena

And Edge, Rey Jr., Batista, Chris Jericho, and throw in Jeff Hardy and Brock Lesnar even though they're not in WWE anymore.

/10 years is a long time

and The Rock and Triple H


Were both with the company in the 90's. Hunter started in what, 96? 97? The Rock was Rocky Maivia in 97.
 
2010-04-02 05:01:18 PM  
TheRevHairless: wantedbadass: jake3988: There hasn't been a star made in the last 10 years except for Randy Orton and John Cena

And Edge, Rey Jr., Batista, Chris Jericho, and throw in Jeff Hardy and Brock Lesnar even though they're not in WWE anymore.

/10 years is a long time

and The Rock and Triple H


Edge - not a household name yet, Slim Jim commercials notwithstanding
Rey Jr. - see above without Slim Jims
Batista - see above, but getting there even if I can't stand him
Jericho - an argument can be made that he's the number 3 man in the company's younger ranks, after Cena and Orton
Jeff Hardy - see above
Lesnar - definitely a star, but credit/blame (depending on your view) falls to his agent, his NFL tryout, and MMA/UFC
Rock, Paul Michael Levesque - actually had their best days/became superstars almost ten years ago now

I get what the boobies poster is saying. There's a lot of young talent and a lot of possible big name stars in the WWE at the moment. But the mid-2000's were quite lean from a fan standpoint. Way too HHH-heavy (for obvious reasons - when you're doing the boss's daughter and she's the lead writer at the time, things tend to look up for your prospects). I know wrestling fans that still won't give the WWE the time of day due to Hunter's overexposure for the last 10 years.

The biggest names from the latest era are really all you can say came out of the 2000's as huge wrestling products or actual transition stars: Cena and Orton, with a slice of Batista (I'm not ready to jump on the Dave Bautista bandwagon just yet though). Jericho has been around a bit longer... he was a midcard draw and mouthpiece in the old WCW before jumping ship. Still, he's become a heavyweight contender in the 2000's, and he's fantastic. So, he's in.
 
2010-04-02 05:27:09 PM  
cycoivan: GoteamVenture: tagjim: The guy who saved Wrestlemania:

who the hell is that guy? He looks like IRS but less intimidating.

i weep for the tarnished name of ecw.

Again with the rockers..most underrated tag team ever? And was Marty Jannetty's finisher the same as the Macho Mans?

That would be Matt Striker. Former schoolteacher turned jobber wrestler turned commentator. He was on ECW (where I really liked him) and is now on Smackdown. I don't like him as much on Smackdown, mainly because I hate Todd Grisham as much as Michael Cole. I do agree though, Matt Striker is definitely more entertaining than King or Cole.

I miss ECW already, WWE NXT is just wretched.

The Rocker's finisher was a suplex by Shawn Michaels while Marty Jannetty does a diving crossbody


I have to admit, I really liked Matt Striker as a commentator. I think him and Joey Styles would have made a killer team.

/haven't watched in a long while
//Joey Styles is the shiat.
 
2010-04-02 05:46:13 PM  
mooseyfate: I have to admit, I really liked Matt Striker as a commentator. I think him and Joey Styles would have made a killer team.

TOTALLY agree!

It'll never happen, tho.

and that makes me sad.
 
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