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(Carson)   Christina Aguilera gets a full beating with the ugly stick   (953party.com) divider line 411
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217082 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Apr 2003 at 5:39 PM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-04-29 07:34:54 PM
Xj14y
Keep your ultra skinny blue eyed blonde haired bimbettes. Give me a cute woman who knows how to cook.


Amen brother. And if she's Asian then all the better.
 
2003-04-29 07:37:43 PM
If I could plow my way through her supposed forest down there (/Durst on Stern) I'd hit it like Mark McGwire.

Christina used to be fine as hell in her first videos, ever since she tried to look like Marilyn Manson in the Lady Marmelade video I can't even look at her. She does have a pretty voice for the style of "music" she does but she needs to go away; take some time off; maybe go to rehab with Jack Osbourne.

"Did you see that new Christina Aguilera video?? I think it gave my television a V.D."...

/Tina Fey, Saturday Night Live
 
2003-04-29 07:37:49 PM
ouroborus -- Okay, at 5'2, 140 would put her at a 25 or so body mass index, which according to the internet is the high terminus of the normal / average / healthy body weight. And as I said, she looks to be under 140.

Personally, I'd rather she hire a new songwriter as opposed to a stylist, but the devil is in the details, I guess. thanks for the m@d pr0pz, jackycane.
 
2003-04-29 07:40:52 PM
Can you say BOTOX, Christina, I am sure you can, and apparently have several times. Anyone seen Mickie Rourke recently ? Aguilara has got that same rubbery texture going for her....MMMMM microwave chicken skin
 
2003-04-29 07:41:51 PM
Who gets this reference?

And what the fark do you think
Christina Aguilera
Is doing right now?

Maybe eatin' a coont
Maybe smokin' a bowl
I wish that I could take off all her clothes
Maybe suckin' a cock,
Maybe snortin' a line
I wish that I could fark her all the time
 
2003-04-29 07:42:41 PM
oh yeah the first part of my comment above was about Britney( in case you didn't already know).
 
2003-04-29 07:42:41 PM
This is so sad. Really, you people need to GET A FARKING LIFE!!! And the people who wrote the article even more so. I mean, geez, people! Have you lost all farking contact with reality!?
Ugly stick? Fat? Heck, getting a little rounder only made her look better. I don't understand the farking ideal with anorectic models.
You people are so pathetic. So. Farking. Pathetic.
 
2003-04-29 07:43:27 PM
NOOOO!!!!! MY GODDESS HAS DESTROYED ALL OF HER BEAUTY!!! except for her cleavegage though, that still looks great...
 
2003-04-29 07:44:35 PM
Two Words--


Cindy Lauper.......
 
2003-04-29 07:47:50 PM
She looks like a normal person now. I think she is beautiful in her own right. Went back to her right hair color and now has a normal woman body. Post your picture your freaks that say she is too big. what does your significant other look like?
 
2003-04-29 07:49:30 PM
Just may be the latin genes kicking in...
 
2003-04-29 07:51:09 PM
 
2003-04-29 07:51:10 PM
Yeah, she's skanky... Yeah, her music is questionably good...

But at least she's not starving herself like so many divas/starlets/actresses and media folks are right now...

Trust me, as someone who is weight-obsessed this is almost encouraging (except without the nose-rings and icky hair and stuff).
 
2003-04-29 07:51:24 PM
Calisa

Okay, she's not fat. But she certainly can't wear any of her whore outfits anymore. Rather, she shouldn't. Which is probably a good thing.

Hopefully she'll take an overdose of diet pills and we'll be searching for pictures of her corpse on ogrish.

I will, anyway.

Jesus, Calisa! Chill out. It's not like she threw baseballs at an osprey or anything!

/Wink, wink, nudge, nudge

 
2003-04-29 07:53:15 PM
When we return, Christina begins channeling Anna Nicole Smith as she eats her fifth Double Quarter Pounder of the day.
/E! True Hollywood Story
 
2003-04-29 07:53:23 PM
Gaaaahhhhh! Farking tag! U have shamed my honor and my family!

/commits seppeku
 
2003-04-29 07:54:03 PM
I mean, have people really became so brainwashed by media that they think that everyone who weighs more than their skeleton is a flabby chubmonster?
It's sad and pathetic. You people should watch TV a bit less, and read books a bit more. Maybe you'll learn something, about others, and about yourselves.
And no, porn mags does not count as books.
 
2003-04-29 07:54:04 PM
Admittedly... I'd rather gnaw through my own leg than be fat... but still...
 
2003-04-29 07:54:46 PM
Give me a break. She still looks better than the majority of women I know, including me.
Comments to the contrary prove that thing about the media making everyone think people's bodies should be unnaturally thin.
Who the hell wants to fark a bag of bones, anyway?
 
2003-04-29 07:55:13 PM
One more big mac and she can sing for the Dixie Chicks
 
2003-04-29 07:55:15 PM
I'd work those extra pounds right off of her...
 
2003-04-29 07:55:38 PM
Er, *I*. Today is not my day

/commits seppeku. Again. With a rusty sword.
 
2003-04-29 07:56:13 PM
Damon, Iron, of COURSE everyone in Pittsburgh is fat. How could you not be? Primanti Brothers, The Dirty O, Dave and Andy's, Quaker Steak, etc.
 
2003-04-29 07:57:09 PM
Wait, wait, wait.

My two little girls grew up with Mulan. Now I have to decultify their brains into not dressing the way Christina does because let's face it, marketing Britney and Christina has a lot of attraction over listening to dumb old dad.

And Christina is a fatty and eating and you folks think that's good and fair?

fark that. I want Christina to starve her skanky little ass again.
 
2003-04-29 08:01:30 PM
I mean, have people really became so brainwashed by media that they think that everyone who weighs more than their skeleton is a flabby chubmonster?

What makes you think that all these people find supermodels attractive at all? There IS an in-between with them and Christina.

Who here hasn't seen some chick wearing "the latest fashions" while having a big jelly roll hanging over the edge of her pants? Anyone in collge or high school should recognize this phenomenon. It doesn't matter if you make a lot of money "singing" crappy songs, if you try to be a slave to fashion, you're going to look stupid.

Yes, I am forced to see stuff like this every day. It just makes me shake my head.
 
2003-04-29 08:02:04 PM
Phatix "The high terminus of the normal ..."
Even if you were right, this would be equivalent to "as fat as one can be without actually being unhealthy". In other words, not so fat as to cause any problems for one's physical health.

"The average" is the statistical mean, not the optimal point. If the average woman of 5'2" weighs 140lb, then that means that most women are over their ideal weight. Being "much like everybody else" is not ideal, it's just not notable.

To me she looks about 120lb or 130lb at most. These are bad photos. But those who point to her lack of muscle tone and caked-on makeup are quite right. That's why she looks so bad. Her previous good looks came from the fact that she had a really slim, somewhat toned body and wasn't afraid to show it off. She doesn't have a stunningly pretty face like Avril Lavigne or Sandra Bullock or Halle Berry. She was hot like Pink, or Sporty Spice, or Anna Kournikova.
 
2003-04-29 08:03:12 PM
The whole ho look turned me off personally. She doesnt look that horrible body wise in those pics. As others have said, at least she's eating but damn beasties.. whats happened to her head? /eye brows. That hair color is baad on her.
 
2003-04-29 08:04:06 PM
but what bout li'l kim's burqua bikini?
 
2003-04-29 08:05:14 PM
Golightly, I used to be the same way. If you ever care to talk, there's contact info in my bio.
 
2003-04-29 08:06:27 PM
She looks fine. Who gives a fark anyway?

/2c
 
2003-04-29 08:06:29 PM
I'm pround of the girl. Everybody was saying she couldnt look any worse and she goes ahead and does it. You go girlfriend.
 
2003-04-29 08:06:58 PM
at least angelina jolie looks pretty much the same sans makeup, that makes me happy

except her hair looks crappy
 
2003-04-29 08:07:21 PM
She doesn't have a stunningly pretty face like Avril Lavigne

I didn't know Avril had a pretty face? Have you seen her w/o makeup? She's just your average highschool sk8tergrl (no pun intented...okay maybe a little)

 
2003-04-29 08:09:28 PM
I think if she lost some of the extra weight to her face, she'd look perfectly normal (and damn hot). Her body is still really good (she doesn't look like she's been gracing the Ethiopian top 40 anymore), everything's sized right...her face is just a little big. That's IT. I'd STILL hit it. Multiple times. Nightly.
 
2003-04-29 08:09:52 PM
L'EnfantTerrible w00t!
 
2003-04-29 08:11:14 PM
They even making dolls of her new look (NSFW)
http://www.imijpop.com/Freepg1.htm
 
2003-04-29 08:13:27 PM
"You need hitting badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be hit, and often, and by someone who knows how"
 
2003-04-29 08:13:36 PM
In a perfect world one would hope that a singer could make a career out of, well... singing.
'course, I don't listen to her, so I have no opinion on that so I'll just talk about her looks like everyone else. And her looks are just fine. I'd probably do a double-take on the street.
 
2003-04-29 08:17:06 PM
Thanx, Jackycane... it's all good.
 
2003-04-29 08:17:14 PM
Man, did she go out and got some birthin' hips, or what? Not that it's a bad thing, necessarily.
 
2003-04-29 08:19:07 PM
Wow, she actually looks hispanic now. Finally.
 
2003-04-29 08:19:07 PM
you people are mean. i actually like her new album because she has talent, so who cares if she weight 97 pounds instead of 95. and as for those pictures; i think they just found two situations in which her clothing choice was off. my $.02
 
2003-04-29 08:24:00 PM
Excellent bio, antialias. Got any art online?
 
2003-04-29 08:26:29 PM
-------------------------------------
Then again, if she dressed sensibly she'd lose a large
portion of her male audience.
-------------------------------------

Ah, the old a-large-portion-of-male-aguilera-fans-are-physically-obssessed argument. Let's not hasten to make anything big of this - after all, all male Aguilera fans are >15...
 
2003-04-29 08:26:44 PM
Pepitopea

"celebrities looking ugly??? NO WAY!!!
FARK IS A MINDBLOWING REALITY CHECK!!!

SOMEONE POST PHOTOS OF CATHERINE ZETA JONES PREGNANT AND NAKED, QUICK!!!

pepito pea


ask and ye shall receive.....(totally nsfw)

CATHERINE ZETA JONES NAKED AND PREGNANT

(i'm going to hell)
 
2003-04-29 08:30:11 PM
A very simple idea, it seems many, many are missing here. How can you tell if she is ugly unless she's stark nude and un-made up, and standing in front of you?

And if that were the case, I'm sure more than one of you of the "ugly, I wouldn't hit it" opinion would change it very quickly.

Sad to say, but I guess I have grown up - give me a plain looking woman, with a little meat on her, who's interested in being a good person, and she's way hotter than todays bleached blonde, enhanced flesh peddler of the day, to me at least.
 
2003-04-29 08:31:01 PM
And smoking no less....
 
2003-04-29 08:31:53 PM
Went back to her right hair color and now has a normal woman body.

Actually, it said somewhere on her official site that her natural colour is blonde. (Orangeglow told me... I swear... heh heh heh...)

Maybe its just me, but I think the dark hair looks completely farked up on her.

And as for her body - if she gets some normal woman clothes that fit her then she'll probably be cute again.
 
2003-04-29 08:33:01 PM
Antialias

Stupid fashion mavens think anyone who weighs over 97 pounds is fat. Christina Aguilera may dress skanky, but she's not fat. Jesus Christ.

While I agree with your sentiment wholeheartedly I find the notion of anyone calling your average Fark forum poster a 'fashion maven' hilarious beyond belief.
 
2003-04-29 08:41:15 PM


I predict the father is................. . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . .. . . . . . a Fred Durst
 
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