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(Carson)   Christina Aguilera gets a full beating with the ugly stick   ( divider line
    More: Sad  
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219331 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Apr 2003 at 5:39 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

411 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-04-29 05:40:42 PM  
2003-04-29 05:40:59 PM  
Well, is she trying to look more like a slut, or less like one?
2003-04-29 05:41:24 PM  
VH1 is gonna offer her a reality show pretty soon.
2003-04-29 05:41:32 PM  
Wow, someone's getting off of coke...
2003-04-29 05:41:32 PM  
sad... just... sad
2003-04-29 05:41:45 PM  
shes not christina anymore, she is going under the alias mega-whore
2003-04-29 05:41:46 PM  
Fell out of the Ugly Tree and hit every branch on the way down?
2003-04-29 05:42:02 PM  


2003-04-29 05:42:08 PM  
I was reading some article on her (at the gym; magazines are free and I'll read almost anything to pass the time), and she was saying how she doesn't diet, loves McDonald's and rarely works out. I thought at that moment, "You know, she hits 22-24, her metabolism drops, and she's farked". I see now that that time has come.
2003-04-29 05:42:17 PM  
Everytime I see that stud on the side of her nose, for an instant I think she didn't blow her nose properly and that's a big drop of snot sitting there.
2003-04-29 05:42:37 PM  
used to be pretty hot...but that, god what the hell happend. i hate to say it but i no longer would hit it
2003-04-29 05:42:41 PM  
I thought she was starting to look fat.
2003-04-29 05:42:42 PM  
I'd still hit it.

2003-04-29 05:42:46 PM  
still hitting with more padding!
2003-04-29 05:42:52 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
That looks like that last place entrant in a bad lookalike contestent.
2003-04-29 05:42:57 PM  
I'd like to beat her with my ugly stick...
2003-04-29 05:43:08 PM  
Remember how 200 years ago scientists were respected and entertainers were seen as sort of silly and lower? Well things like this bring back the cycle of history.
2003-04-29 05:43:11 PM  
I still wouldn't hit it.
2003-04-29 05:43:11 PM  
2003-04-29 05:43:39 PM  
check out the sweet BBQ grille
2003-04-29 05:43:40 PM  
Coming up next on E!: 'Christina Aguilera: A Nightmare Descent Into Big Macs & Large Fries.'
2003-04-29 05:43:55 PM  
No Farking way.... I still don't believe that that's her.
2003-04-29 05:44:04 PM  
Holy shiat. From this to this.
2003-04-29 05:44:09 PM  
The article 4 down, The Infamous Fox News - J.Lo Blooper!, is a classic.
2003-04-29 05:44:17 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

I think she wet herself.

2003-04-29 05:44:18 PM  
No no no, that's her step sister, Larry.
2003-04-29 05:44:32 PM  
She's done.
2003-04-29 05:44:48 PM  
actually, I thought she was WAY too skinny before. FREAKY skinny. But NOW she's gone the way of the Big Mac. So sad. So very, very sad.
woof. woof.
2003-04-29 05:45:01 PM  
Y'all are why I rarely come into the threads anymore. Stupid farkers.
2003-04-29 05:45:02 PM  
Wow, so she's growing up.

What, you all expected her to maintain the body of a 12 year old?
2003-04-29 05:45:14 PM  
What's up with the farked up colouring on her face? It's like she's a shade of orange now.
And the sad part is that the only thing decent on her now (cleavage) is fake. She's had two boob jobs since she got famous.

It's things like this that make me proud to be a "I'd fark Britney instead of Christina" club member.
2003-04-29 05:45:23 PM  
Holy crap what the hell was that?

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 05:46:05 PM  
2003-04-29 05:46:19 PM  
From the Sun:

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 05:46:20 PM  
She is definately pregnant, and the daddy will never be found
2003-04-29 05:46:28 PM  
I'm scared and need comforting.
2003-04-29 05:46:30 PM  
she was a teen when she was 65lbs... now she's getting older and gaining the freshman 15(0)... not to mention said beating with said fugly stick...
2003-04-29 05:46:30 PM  
Longview - that's her 'makeup'. She always seems to wear it like that. Sad that money can't buy her a makeup artist (or a personal trainer for that matter)
2003-04-29 05:46:33 PM  
I see kittens... Alive and kicking, spared another life.
2003-04-29 05:46:43 PM  
Fell out the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Then the tree fell on her. She was then taken to the ugly hospital in the ugly ambulance. However she never reached the hospital because the ugly ambulance crashed into the ugly bus.
2003-04-29 05:46:45 PM  
These pop starlets are all the same. They wouldn't look so focking pretty if they didn't load layers of makeup on and spend hours with their hair.
2003-04-29 05:46:47 PM  
wow, i have to admit - it really IS satisfying to see someone like her get fat and ugly. i'm so ashamed.

/hopes britney's next
2003-04-29 05:46:48 PM  
Scroll down to the part about "The Infamous Fox News - J.Lo Blooper!" The video is here.

2003-04-29 05:47:23 PM  
Oh please. I still wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers... personally I'm happy she dropped the Dee Snider look, that was just creepy. Now she's actually proportioned like a good half of humanity. If this

[image from too old to be available]

is "ugly", then stop the fscking planet. I want off.
2003-04-29 05:47:30 PM  
that first picture is where nightmares get their ideas
2003-04-29 05:48:07 PM  
Kyosuke - What, you all expected her to maintain the body of a 12 year old?

No, eating healthy and working out would be a start.
2003-04-29 05:48:15 PM  
Flakeloaf: It's not the body, it's the face. GAH. Then again, not like it wasn't GAH before.
2003-04-29 05:48:25 PM  

When she's thin she's a too skinny, when she heavy she's too fat. Some people are too opinionated. I'd love to see pictures of all of you flaming her for putting on a few lbs.

On a side note, I think she's an obnoxious 'B' that needs to be humbled. Maybe this is the Music God's way of chastising her for her lack charity.

2003-04-29 05:48:32 PM  

gotta be.

Could I care less?
2003-04-29 05:48:32 PM  
i think this might have happend sometime after she mysteriously got the "skank" accent... or speech impediment... whatever you call it.
2003-04-29 05:48:33 PM  
I bet she's pregnant. That would explain the dark hair bleaching while incubating.
2003-04-29 05:48:44 PM  
The child actually looks healthy now, instead of hungry. Good for her!

Of course, I wouldn't hit it...unless she had a Y chromosome. *peers*
2003-04-29 05:48:50 PM  
Your definately rediculous!

/passed 2nd grade
2003-04-29 05:48:54 PM  
It's not so much her body, really. I mean, now she's proportioned like a normal person instead of a stick figure. But her face just looks...weird. Bloated, maybe. Or maybe it's just the dark hair. Or crappy makeup. Or...
2003-04-29 05:48:57 PM  
I still can't believe that is her...
2003-04-29 05:48:59 PM  
Did anyone hear that interview with Justin Timberlake on Chicago's KISS 103.5 (the one where the DJ got suspended)?

"I bet Christina's all dirty in her naughty area, y'know, Justin?"

Haha, comedy gold.
2003-04-29 05:49:14 PM  
I don't find her attractive either way but I think she looks better with the dark hair, although her choice of clothing is less than flattering. Her arms used to look like bones covered with skin.. she looks healthier now.
2003-04-29 05:49:17 PM  
wow, now she looks like every other girl from Pittsburgh, too.
2003-04-29 05:49:29 PM  
I'm with Flakeloaf on this one. Granted, her hips are a little wide and her face is ugly as sin, but between her neck and her navel she's a-okay!
2003-04-29 05:49:31 PM  

Aww, come on, you farkers! If some chick that looked just like her came up to you and started chatting you up, you'd farkin' hit it - hard.

Don't lie - unless there's some money in it.

2003-04-29 05:49:43 PM  
OK, maybe I'm gonna get eaten alive for this...

but what's the big deal?

So she's got a little meat, nothing wrong with that. Honestly it's comments like these that give women eating disorders.
2003-04-29 05:49:50 PM  

04-29-03 05:44:18 PM ShutUpHippies

No no no, that's her step sister, Larry.

Nice work, sir.
2003-04-29 05:50:01 PM  
I'm with Moleman
If all it takes to go from "hot" to "ugly" is a few pounds and black hair then maybe she wasn't all that hot in the first place.
She was awful before and she's awful now.
2003-04-29 05:50:13 PM  
She managed to get uglier?
2003-04-29 05:50:27 PM  

She quit the coke alright.
2003-04-29 05:50:33 PM  
atleast her boobies got bigger :)

seriously though, doesnt she have a sister? cuz it looks like she grew a foot taller as well. (compare her head to the rest of her body).
2003-04-29 05:50:52 PM  
The kittens will see tomorrow.
2003-04-29 05:50:58 PM  
Did you guys see the crazy w0nky eyed pug? Even he wouldn't hit it.
2003-04-29 05:51:44 PM  
Seems as if my post that preceded this one was posted at the same time as about elleventy billion others saying the same thing...
2003-04-29 05:51:58 PM  
she also needs to stop using this: bronze stuff.
she looks like a carrot
2003-04-29 05:52:00 PM  
I think the sluttier version of her -- err wait, nevermind.

Anyone notice the HUGE skin tone differnce with her make-up caked face and her pasty boobs...reminds me of a whorish high school girl that grew up with no mom, and an abusive dad.
2003-04-29 05:52:02 PM  
She looks like a very well done trannie now......
2003-04-29 05:52:08 PM  
Preganant? Fred Durst is the father.

She really doesn't look that bad, just really really different.
2003-04-29 05:52:21 PM  
Good points Buzz_kirkwood, FalseEyedDio... the only one who can show up with Bjork-face and actually pull it off is... well... Bjork.
2003-04-29 05:53:14 PM  
For the record, she looks a lot better now than she's done in a few years


[image from too old to be available]

Versus this:

[image from too old to be available]

[image from too old to be available]

I rest my case.

OK, not as good as this:

[image from too old to be available]

Hopefully the GIS hot-linking gods are with me...
2003-04-29 05:53:25 PM  
I think I speak for all who love music when I say...


Your fifteen minutes are officially OVER! GET OFF THE STAGE! (and not a moment too soon. Stupid moron stuck-up...)
2003-04-29 05:53:32 PM  
she looks pregnant...

farking slut
2003-04-29 05:53:35 PM  
Its not so much the weight she gained, its the rolls hanging out of her clothes that bother me. o.o Jeebus.
2003-04-29 05:53:47 PM  
I must have been busy last week when she became famous. Is she a singer, or a faith healer, or what? She looks like your average mall rat to me.
2003-04-29 05:53:53 PM  
2003-04-29 05:53:53 PM  
2003-04-29 05:53:54 PM  
Schnapple: Crap looks better than crap looks better than crap?
2003-04-29 05:53:55 PM  
She is the female version of Marlon Brando.
2003-04-29 05:54:10 PM  
yuk ... and I dont know flakeloaf ... yeah she can live without food now for a few weeks and live off of her own deposits ... but apart from de-dee-ing .. :\

she represents the eh friend of a group of girls at a club that I would get stuck with
2003-04-29 05:54:15 PM  
It isn't just that she put on weight, but she put on weight while having absolutely no muscle tone. She's totally soft with nothing underneath it.

IronCity - That's probably the best comment on the board. Very few can feel your pain though.

/Pittsburgh, born and raised
2003-04-29 05:54:16 PM  
Stupid fashion mavens think anyone who weighs over 97 pounds is fat. Christina Aguilera may dress skanky, but she's not fat. Jesus Christ.
2003-04-29 05:54:22 PM  
To those of you wailing about our incredible insensitivity to the plight of the larger woman, read more carefully. I don't think many of us are complaining about her weight. It's her face. Blech. It looks like she's trying to achieve a face lift with her hair yanked back like that.
2003-04-29 05:54:41 PM  
I'm the baby's daddy!
2003-04-29 05:54:57 PM  

I bet she's pregnant. That would explain the dark hair bleaching while incubating.

Yes, I do believe I heard that she was pregnant on one of the local radio stations here. Fine, she's pregnant...but I bet there's alot of different people who could be the father.
2003-04-29 05:55:00 PM  
Wow...I'd still hit it...unless, of course, fb- already did, ifyaknowatimean...
2003-04-29 05:55:28 PM  
she should sue McDonald's.
2003-04-29 05:55:43 PM  

Look at the first pic you posted. Look at her face and then look at her chest. How many shades different are they? I mean Jeebus, who's her make-up guy, Bob Vila?
2003-04-29 05:55:46 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 05:55:55 PM  
Well she's trying to be like Madonna. Madonna changed her hair all the time from blonde to brunette etc. Well, we know what happened to Madonna.
2003-04-29 05:56:28 PM  
Cscx: I used to live in Wexford. Went to the same school Christina claimed to have attended. (No, she was homeschooled after 8th grade.) Even we disown her.
2003-04-29 05:56:33 PM  
come to think of it, I AM reminded of Godfather part II
2003-04-29 05:56:39 PM  
She needs to switch from crack to crack lite
2003-04-29 05:56:42 PM  
...with apologies to KunoIchi
2003-04-29 05:57:10 PM  
Definitely pregnant - her face is bloated, boobs are puffed, looks like she's about 10 weeks into it.
2003-04-29 05:57:46 PM  
I about spit out my pop at the J-LO blooper news part, hahaha if you havent listened you have to hear it!!

and Christina doesnt look so bad, but its a shame her make-up artist can't find base that matches her skin tone.
2003-04-29 05:58:18 PM  
I suggest you all click on Cscx's link if you haven't already. Funniest thing all day.
2003-04-29 05:58:26 PM  
masturbation diet, anyone?
2003-04-29 05:58:33 PM  
The fox news J.Lo Blooper video on that page is much more intertaining.
2003-04-29 05:58:38 PM  
Why does everybody hate this chick? I'm not about to join her farking fan club, but it's not like she kicks puppies all day. Sheesh.
2003-04-29 05:59:00 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

I didn't mean to burn dowh that club...
2003-04-29 05:59:02 PM  
Call me crazy, but she looks better now.

/still wouldn't hit that disease infested ho though
2003-04-29 05:59:02 PM  
FalseEyedDio Hmm so did I a long time ago but didn't know tthat little tidbit. Thanks.
2003-04-29 05:59:04 PM  
As far as terrible makeup goes, Cyndi Lauper has always been good enough.
[image from too old to be available]
She's good enough for me, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!
2003-04-29 05:59:35 PM  
Actually, the wide hips are giving me a boner.
2003-04-29 05:59:41 PM  
04-29-03 05:53:35 PM Michikade

Its not so much the weight she gained, its the rolls hanging out of her clothes that bother me. o.o Jeebus.

She hangs out of her clothes not because she's at all fat, but because her clothes are so small to begin with. If she'd only dress sensibly...
Then again, if she dressed sensibly she'd lose a large portion of her male audience.
2003-04-29 05:59:42 PM  
Schnapple That looks like 4 completly different people.

in these particular picture she looks wierd, and maybe a little fat, probably cuz she's still buying size zeros. She's not more than a size 5, and I would not not not call her fat. Especially since I'm a size nine.

2003-04-29 06:00:00 PM  
She is a little overweight but better that than anorexic
2003-04-29 06:00:12 PM  
I don't know what's funnier in that Shepard Smith clip, the slip up, or his "sincere" apology afterwards.
2003-04-29 06:00:31 PM  
AntiAlias you haven't seen the puppy kicking video? It's sad and scary, really.
2003-04-29 06:00:48 PM  
She needs her eyebrows back. Without them she looks too much like my sixth grade science teacher.

How do all you out there know she's a slut? She could just be a huge cock tease.
2003-04-29 06:00:56 PM  
i think she still looks fine, what's wrong with you people? can't handle a little meat on the bones?? jeesh.
2003-04-29 06:01:08 PM  
ha ha ha, the filenames are "xtina_ugly1" nice.
2003-04-29 06:01:25 PM  
Perhaps this crack-whore shall take attention away from that farking repugnant Morgan Webb. Why does that name sound contrived? Not unlike that farking (change it...FARKING...biatch) Marilyn Vos Savant. It's way too easy to make a mark as "intelligent" with the greater public.

/time to vomit
2003-04-29 06:01:51 PM  
She hangs out of her clothes not because she's at all fat, but because her clothes are so small to begin with. If she'd only dress sensibly...

That's kinda my point. I don't have a problem with the weight - she looks normal (and not anerexic) now. But now that she is a bigger then 38 lbs girl, she needs to dress like one. That's my point.
2003-04-29 06:01:58 PM  
Well, SOMEBODY hit it...
2003-04-29 06:02:00 PM  
time to make a shopping list...

1 gallon Methylene chloride based paint stripper
1 qt wood filler
1 qt lacquer thinner
1 gal. paint thinner
1 gal. Spar Varnish
60,80,100,220, and 400 grit sandpaper, 3 sheets each
Makita palm sander
Good hand sanding block
Putty knives, 1-1/2" and 3"

Oh, that list was for my boat. but it'd probably help
her out too. especially the paint stripper- looks like
at least ten layers of old crusty makeup to come off....

And I'd hit it if it didn't come with so much attitude,
and it could be counted on to not take off in a day. coupla
extra pounds never hurt a woman, long as she doesn't turn
into a lumbering piewagon before your eyes.
2003-04-29 06:02:00 PM  
Cscx: She threw fits because nobody in middle school paid any attention to her despite her Mickey Mouse Club superstardom, so she made up stories that people were picking on her. All the complaints she has in interviews about her "miserable childhood" date back to this time, not to high school like she implies.

I think she came through Pittsburgh for a concert once and they were giving out two tickets for the price of one. Even didn't sell out.
2003-04-29 06:03:43 PM  
its not the weight, or the muscle tone, or the clothes, or the hair, its all of them together...

she looks like every other pram pusher now, what happened?
2003-04-29 06:05:13 PM  
Remember girls, this is why you don't become an anorexic-crank-snorting-crack-whore. As soon as you gain a couple pounds, everyone will think you're a fat ass because you don't look like a skeleton anymore.
2003-04-29 06:05:32 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

"The mirror! THE MIRROR!!"
2003-04-29 06:06:08 PM  

Badmouthing Morgan Webb in a Fark thread? You ought to know better. I myself am not a fan, but even I know that's a big mistake.
2003-04-29 06:06:40 PM  
The problem (at least to me) is certainly not that she gained weight. She could look fantastic if she just put on some decent-looking clothes. And laid off the eye makeup just a bit. But good lord, she really does ruin it in those pics...
2003-04-29 06:06:43 PM  
She dosen't look fat, but she should get some bigger pants, rolls never look good no matter how small you are. She looks better than she has in a long time.
2003-04-29 06:06:59 PM  
Chewy Aguilera
2003-04-29 06:07:12 PM  

No one here in the burgh ever goes out. They roll up the sidewalks at 10 pm. I like living here, but the night life is lame here.
2003-04-29 06:07:29 PM  
J.Lo Fox blooper on same page.

2003-04-29 06:08:17 PM  
ok I took so long to post that im redundant

2003-04-29 06:08:23 PM  
The sad thing is she has a great voice. She just sings really, really dumb songs.
2003-04-29 06:08:32 PM  
She is a fattie, now she has to put on a party hat.
2003-04-29 06:08:38 PM  
Utter_bastard: Get out. Now.
2003-04-29 06:09:17 PM  
People beyotch and moan that she's too skinny and that she needs to eat, so she eats and people beyotch and moan that she's too fat. Make up your farking minds!
2003-04-29 06:09:25 PM  
If you haven't already, please do check out Cscx's link given above as it really is quite funny (she's from Wexford y'know)
2003-04-29 06:09:51 PM  
C'mon guys. She is beautiful, in every single way, and words can't bring her down.
2003-04-29 06:10:04 PM  
2003-04-29 06:10:24 PM  
Actually, she appears to be a two-face now. Looks better or worse depending on the picture/angle/lighting. They should just keep her in the back booth at Monks' Cafe.

"Now THIS is a good-lookin' booth!"
2003-04-29 06:10:32 PM  
I tell ya what. I've seen worst, and I sure wouldnt kick the 'new' version out of bed.

I mean this is an actual IMPROVEMENT over the "Lady Marmalade" stage. Be honest about that.

The truth is, she was never that sexy to begin with. Not when she was trapped in a bottle, not as a prostitute, and certainly not as a brunette lesbian.

If you ever thought she was attractive then your entire view of attractive is probably a bit skewed. The ONLY phase of attractive she ever went through was back when she fit the 'media' billing of attractive. Ya know, blonde hair, small clothes, big tits.

about 90% of the women of fark blow that girl away and that is fact.

And since this thread calls for some Boobies Links, Find some attractive people At My Site Instead(NSFW, its pr0n)
2003-04-29 06:11:02 PM  
She looks like a cross between Gwen Stefani and Bjork. Scary.
2003-04-29 06:11:33 PM  
04-29-03 06:06:59 PM Cow_Cudd_X

Chewy Aguilera

"Chewy", the adjective or "Chewie" the Wookie? Maybe she really is chewy, I don't know for sure.
2003-04-29 06:11:59 PM  
No, like I said I like it here (hell of a lot cheaper than most places). There are just not enough places to go for late night stuff. I work nights so late night things are important on my days off.
2003-04-29 06:12:00 PM  

biatch deserved it.
2003-04-29 06:12:19 PM  
This is the best pic of them all....

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 06:12:35 PM  
Nothing a change of makeup artist and wardrobe person couldn't fix...those people work magic, and it looks the ones she's got now are wicked witches of the west.
2003-04-29 06:12:36 PM  
The truth is though, I think "Attractive" is tied into personality a lot. Really a lot.

I think anyone on the planet can tell you there is something WRONG with Christina Aguilera. She's just not right in the head, or elsewhere.

I think that's a big part of it. She doesnt want to be attractive, or cant be, or something. I dunno. God bless her though I hope she figures it out someday. She has a nice voice, if she was making better music with it I think that'd be cool.
2003-04-29 06:12:46 PM  
that bat disturbs and confuses me.
*staring blankly at screen*
2003-04-29 06:13:25 PM  
you know -- you pathetic cretins saying she's not a fatass now are, clearly, fatasses yourself. the girl is FAT. and it's NOT attractive. i don't mind a little chub but half mad crippled creeping jesus, man ... she's a goddamn hog now.

yuck. she's been removed from my 'i'd hit it' list.
2003-04-29 06:13:47 PM  
Utter_bastard: Yeah, I'll have to agree with that. I pay half of a 1650/month rent for a single apartment in San Francisco, and I still spend all my time on fark anyway. :(
2003-04-29 06:13:58 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 06:14:15 PM  
I don't know why everyone is saying she's ugly NOW. She's always been ugly and skanky. The one thing I will give her, that she at least wasn't afraid to flaunt her skankiness and embrace it. Unlike Ms. Spears, who tried to act all prim & proper when we allllll know that long ago she was dabbling in recreactional activities which, among others, included bumping uglies with Justin and a few other "lucky" bachelors.

I really don't know which is worse, however: hideous, fake, orange, anorexic, Jersey mall hair Christina OR frightening, pale, slighty chunky, greasy-haired Christina???
2003-04-29 06:14:17 PM  
Now all the guys who can only hit obese chicks can lay claim to her.

Yeah you've been farking a fat assed girl that is 320 pounds, you'll fark anything.
2003-04-29 06:15:49 PM  
Where's Wexford? I thought she was from Pittsburgh.

That clip was very funny, though. Good work Cscx.
2003-04-29 06:15:53 PM  
I agree: At least she isn't doing the Dee Snyder thing anymore. She looked like one of those street urchins in certain war-torn regions of South America. With the darker hair and with it pulled up and the white dress, she looks almost (dare I say it?) classy. Almost.

That being said, I agree that she looks healthier with some meat on her bones, but a workout regimen and staying away from the greasy fries wouldn't do her any harm.

Whether she decides to be musician or model, I don't think anyone will ever take her very seriously anyway.

Getting my eyeballs sandpapered
Um... I'll take, "What I'd Rather Be Doing Than Listening To Christina Aguilera's Music" for a thousand, Alex.
2003-04-29 06:16:22 PM  
I pay less than a third of that for a 1000 sq ft place here 1br here. My family wants me to move back to Atlanta, fat chance of that. Nothing like heat, humidity and over priced homes and apartments.
2003-04-29 06:16:23 PM  

She was never particularly attractive to begin with, and I don't think it's so much that she's horribly overweight, it's that she's still trying to dress like she wears a size 0. People who don't wear the right size clothing scare me.

Either that, or it's her cousin's neighbor, Daphne!

/Andy Dick reference

2003-04-29 06:16:27 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
She was hotter when she was a nun.
2003-04-29 06:16:53 PM  
the Aguileras eat their young
2003-04-29 06:17:05 PM  
Recockulous: Wexford is a completely forgettable suburb of Pittsburgh. As bland as you'd imagine a suburb could be.
2003-04-29 06:17:07 PM  
Look at me
I will never pass for a perfect bride
Or a perfect daughter
Can it be
I'm not meant to play this part?
Now I see
That if I were to truly
To be myself
I would break my family's heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight
Back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am
Though I've tried
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
2003-04-29 06:17:11 PM  
Nothing 'hot' about that nun picture either. Gross.
2003-04-29 06:18:10 PM  
Naughty baby did a no-no.

/Andy Dick
2003-04-29 06:18:47 PM  

Man, how high are your standards? What do you, run a modeling agency or something? Tell me you don't honestly think she's fat!
2003-04-29 06:19:12 PM was a joke.
2003-04-29 06:19:16 PM  
Porky pop star Christina Aguilera has piled on 12 kilograms in two months but she isn't fat, insists her PR, "she's just carb-loading to prepare for her gruelling tour with Justin Timberlake". Timberlake, meanwhile, has reportedly issued an edict that no staff at the London hotel where he'll stay during his British tour may speak to him
directly - they have to communicate through his staff.
2003-04-29 06:19:34 PM  
No way she's fat: you farkers are WAY TO PICKY!! Jesus Christ! You know how much action you'd get if you weren't so damned picky?! But wait, I'd bet that all you guys are just putting on a show, because you pathetic virgins would hit a farking dog if given half a chance!

But yeah, she did hit the ugly tree or something.
2003-04-29 06:19:54 PM  
bravo Kurt
2003-04-29 06:20:03 PM  
Just making sure toast ;) some people get off at the weirdest things!
2003-04-29 06:20:35 PM  
Woo Hoo, about time, she's always been little C Uglylera. Now she's putting weight on too.

Yes, she can sing, but she is no sex symbol.
2003-04-29 06:21:11 PM  
Wow. There seems to be a lot of people saying that it's her face that is weird. Or that he clothes are way to small and too skanky.

Nope. It's the fat. She's a chubby girl now.
2003-04-29 06:22:47 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

The real Christina, that is, not the bleached, lipo'd, coked-out, talentless corporate Golem she's been turned into.

Okay, maybe the lack of talent hasn't changed much...

/wonder how much she got for her soul?
2003-04-29 06:23:16 PM  
Junk inna trunk wit the tig ol bitties....

Had to be said. I still wouldn't hit it with a Buick.

Her head is too big. Even now, it's all out of proportion with the rest of her body. Kinda creepy, really...
2003-04-29 06:23:30 PM  

"Lumbering piewagon"? Man, you should have enabled voting for that blast. Well played.

2003-04-29 06:24:22 PM  

[image from too old to be available]

Dear Mr. Hinckley, Do not shoot Reagan on my behalf.
Love, Jodie

I think the new pics look better than the old.
2003-04-29 06:25:15 PM  
I still wouldn't kick her out of bed for eatin' crackers.
2003-04-29 06:25:23 PM  
since when is she a brunette? that seriously doesn't look a thing like her.
2003-04-29 06:26:11 PM  
I'd hit it...

...with the Ugly Stick.

2003-04-29 06:26:23 PM  
My post in today's Photoshop thread:
[image from too old to be available]

/vote whoring
2003-04-29 06:27:13 PM  
Timberlake, meanwhile, has reportedly issued an edict that no staff at the London hotel where he'll stay during his British tour may speak to him
directly - they have to communicate through his staff

As big headed as that sounds, it is probably the result of years of having people throng about you who are supposed to be working for you (or for the place you are staying).
I used to work in an arena and thought it pitiful the number of people who would fall all over themselves over anyone with some level of celebrity. Even Henry Winkler.
2003-04-29 06:27:40 PM  
She needs to hit the gym, and go on a diet. And go back to being blonde. Very few girls can pull off the brunette/black hair thing. Mandy Moore needs to do it too. We all want the blue eyed, blonde hair girl.
2003-04-29 06:28:01 PM  
You guys really think she is too fat?
2003-04-29 06:28:07 PM  
04-29-03 05:49:43 PM Lord_Dubu
OK, maybe I'm gonna get eaten alive for this...

but what's the big deal?

So she's got a little meat, nothing wrong with that. Honestly it's comments like these that give women eating disorders.

thank you for saying that. it's true. comments like these, media, society, parents, all these things when compounded with the "traumas" of puberty add up to, sadly often, toilet hugging and/or meal skipping.

- e/d survivor
2003-04-29 06:29:04 PM  
I'd like to see some of the tail being pulled in by those calling her "fat" or "ugly."
2003-04-29 06:29:26 PM  
Mmmmm, Cyndi Lauper! (drool)
2003-04-29 06:30:58 PM  
Fat or thin, I'd hit it in a heartbeat.
2003-04-29 06:31:50 PM  
I still would not kick her out of bed unless she was better on the floor. Besides... now she has more cushion so I won't bruise my hips on her bony ass.
2003-04-29 06:32:29 PM  
has anyone noticed that she is incredibly dark on her face, but her boobs are really really really freaking white. They may even be whiter than mine. Where did that hispanic blood go to?
2003-04-29 06:32:46 PM  
Feh, now she looks average, and average isn't good in the spotlight.
2003-04-29 06:33:16 PM  
I saw a pic of her last month or so and told a friend "i bet shes pregnant"... shes doubled in size since then. And her boobs are really big and saggy, this is pregnancy fat not mcdonalds fat (unless she shoves burgers in her pussy, actually she probably does, and is giving birth to a processed cow)

wonder who's the daddy? Anyone seen Fb- lately?
2003-04-29 06:33:31 PM  
no farking way, that isnt her, just as someone said b4, probably a look alike contest or something
2003-04-29 06:33:41 PM  
Sweet Mother Of God! This is a sign of the apocolypse. Why Christina, why?? I so wanted to wax that azz, but now... well... OK, I'll still wax it, but I won't be happy about it.
2003-04-29 06:34:11 PM  
She fell outta the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.
2003-04-29 06:34:16 PM  
Actually it just looks like she isn't wearing as much makeup.
2003-04-29 06:35:26 PM  
Hebalo Words may not work, but I'm willing give a blow to the base of the skull a try.
2003-04-29 06:35:37 PM  
My God. WTF happened. Not good. But don't get me wrong I'd still, well you know how the saying goes. Of course I have very loose standards when it comes to one-nighters and hook ups.
2003-04-29 06:36:24 PM  
celebrities looking ugly??? NO WAY!!!


pepito pea
2003-04-29 06:38:32 PM  
So _THAT'S_ why she wrote that "beautiful" or whatever song, an attempted pre-emptive compensatory strike!!

But no seriously. Good she doesn't look annorexic, but this is just.. a little too.. weird. She's just gotta be pregnant.
2003-04-29 06:39:17 PM  
Pepitopea: Interesting site you have.
2003-04-29 06:39:28 PM  
Okay, she's not fat. But she certainly can't wear any of her whore outfits anymore. Rather, she shouldn't. Which is probably a good thing.

Hopefully she'll take an overdose of diet pills and we'll be searching for pictures of her corpse on ogrish.

I will, anyway.
2003-04-29 06:39:36 PM  
Let me clarify.... I don't mind a girl that eats. Hell, someone who hasn't had anything but 3 hard boiled egg whites and a banana since breakfast just will not be that pleasant to be around.

That being said, I never did find that face (or that watermelon sized head) of hers to be attractive, but that is a personal opinion. I don't find 70% of the supermodels out there to be attractive. I'm more the Valerie Bertinelli, Leah Remini type. Yes, seriously. Maybe it was because I went through puberty when One Day At A Time was on, and McKenzie Phillips looked like my cousin, (so that would never fly) but that what has followed me to adulthood.

Keep your ultra skinny blue eyed blonde haired bimbettes. Give me a cute woman who knows how to cook.

God, that sounds horrible, but it's the way I feel, dammit.
2003-04-29 06:40:32 PM  
Just because you couldn't get into bed with her, don't call her a slut. She's not fat. If she dropped the makeup and got clothes that fit her, she'd be gorgeous.
2003-04-29 06:41:12 PM  
Um, four out of focus and low quality pictures are supposed to tell us that a formerly dead-sexy and quite thin pop star is about to drop dead of a McDonald's-induced heart attack? Sorry, I'm not that gullible.

Yeah, she doesn't look great in those pictures, but it's probably just a new look she was trying out (note the black hair) that isn't that great to look at. She'll be back to normal in a few weeks, once the cookie-cutter producers of all the pop stars realize that it's not working for her.
2003-04-29 06:42:24 PM  
Xj14y, don't worry, there's an easy explanation for all of that.

You're a homosexual.

/Professional Outer
2003-04-29 06:42:54 PM  
Now all the farkettes love you
2003-04-29 06:43:38 PM  
ugh.. eyes bleeding... better stop the earth for that one dude who posted.. because in that pic she's ugly..
2003-04-29 06:43:47 PM  
she looks just like Matt Bellamy from Muse only with 10 kilograms more on her.. O_o odd.
2003-04-29 06:43:51 PM  
those look more like photoshops to me
2003-04-29 06:43:52 PM  
I'd hit it just to say I'd hit it (I mean, come on...), but I'd probably have to hit it with someone else's stolen dick.
2003-04-29 06:44:51 PM  
the prepubecent peanut gallery is the mosty vocal here... grow some short and curlies fisrt and then we can talk about what you would or wouldn't hit.....


i will agree, what happend to the shape of her head?? looks like one of those busts of some inbred pharoh ....
hey buddy, why the long face???
2003-04-29 06:45:21 PM  
Elite-mrp: Lick my left one, you tick turd. (combining 2 great movie insults)


AcidPink: You'd have to ask my wife first.... But if she says it's cool, then I'm up for it.
2003-04-29 06:46:45 PM  
Hmm, human, breathing, female. Yup, I'd hit it.
2003-04-29 06:47:15 PM  
Xj14y, I'm only playing. You didn't have to call me a turd :(
2003-04-29 06:48:33 PM  
[image from too old to be available][image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 06:49:25 PM  
Photographers snap tons of pictures of a celebrity. It's not hard to pick four that at bad angles make her look like a demon. I'm sure if you take a bunch of stills of say...Jennifer Aniston during an episode of Friends, in at least three she'd look like an ogre.

Besides, I'd still hit it before I'd hit Britney.
2003-04-29 06:49:33 PM  

Be careful who you play with. Apology accepted. If it happens again, I'll bend your teeth.

All in fun, of course...
2003-04-29 06:54:35 PM  
Elite-mrp: A farker who apologizes???

Sure looks like she's pregnant to me. Perhaps ?
2003-04-29 06:57:21 PM  
I'd still hit it, a little cushin' for the pushin' never scared me off.

/sweep kittens into trash
2003-04-29 06:57:40 PM  

She lost the excessive makeup, the tan and went brunette.

If she didn't get publicised, it would be a good disguise for going out in public.

check out">

Plenty of others out there if you look around

2003-04-29 06:58:09 PM  
The filter gets rid of F b is the father now? Why?
2003-04-29 07:01:21 PM  
Apparently, the filter got rid of Fark as we know it...
2003-04-29 07:01:42 PM  
Guess what: She doesn't give a fark what you think.
2003-04-29 07:01:45 PM  
And more pictures of her looking frumpy.
2003-04-29 07:03:53 PM  
Although she has gained some weight, she was way damn too skinny before.... I'll be among those who say "I'd hit it"

plus, imagine her hittin those high notes in bed...yowza...
2003-04-29 07:06:16 PM  
I don't mind that she gained a few lbs... but God, she looks hideous now! Before, it was slutty, but you could imagine her not being so. Now she just looks...ugly.
She looks like she had plastic surgery to make her look worse.
2003-04-29 07:06:47 PM  
take it easy on the braiding Chistina....

Traction alopecia is hair loss due to excessive and chronic pulling, or traction, on hair. It commonly occurs in people who braid or knot their hair.

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 07:07:45 PM  
Now all the guys who can only hit obese chicks can lay claim to her. Yeah you've been farking a fat assed girl that is 320 pounds, you'll fark anything.

Ouch! Gator8387
That hurt my feelings :-( Some guys prefer big gals, and while I'm not 320 lbs big, that was kinda mean!

/sweet chubby girl
2003-04-29 07:08:07 PM  
I like the original Christina. Not Dee Snyder wannabe...not man... original.
2003-04-29 07:08:43 PM  

I just spotted this. Kiana Tom without the makeup looks like Vanessa Carlton with makeup. Works for me...
2003-04-29 07:11:00 PM  
Ha! Code_Archeologist my fave position! :-P

/naughty girl
2003-04-29 07:11:03 PM  
I'm not sure why some folks are complaining about her "ugliness" more than her "music". you listen to music. You don't have to look at it. She looks to be under 140 lbs. -- not fat, that's solidly average for her age group. Crowbar your eyes away from whatever heroin model you're staring at for a second and come back to reality. I don't think she's ugly, but media retouching and professional hair/makeup jobs make her look better than she is.

That said, her music was hit by the ugly stick at birth.
2003-04-29 07:11:06 PM  
At least now she looks like a tubby vampire instead of a strung-out junkie hoebag
2003-04-29 07:15:28 PM  

Haha! Tubby Vampire!

To quote Dave Barry "That would make a great band name"
2003-04-29 07:16:35 PM  
Im not so sure these pics are real, maybe her face is so much darker because someone photoshoped it.
2003-04-29 07:17:37 PM  
She looks to be under 140 lbs. -- not fat, that's solidly average for her age group.

5'2" / 140lbs. isn't average

At least now she looks like a tubby vampire instead of a strung-out junkie hoebag


so we're all agreed: she needs to fire her personal stylist
2003-04-29 07:17:55 PM  
I still find her sexy and I'd hit it. As for the pretentious flakes with the edacity to ridicule this girl, Move On And Get Over It.

/let the flame war finish
2003-04-29 07:18:07 PM  
Phatix is my new hero. That is all.
2003-04-29 07:20:05 PM  
Kinda has that "miss piggy" look going in the pink outfit. Never thought much of her looks but girl can sing.
2003-04-29 07:20:25 PM  
5'2" / 140lbs. isn't average

They said UNDER 140 lbs. And 5'4"/142 lbs is average. Close enough.
2003-04-29 07:22:05 PM  
2003-04-29 07:23:04 PM  
1. She gained weight.
2. She's not fat yet, but diva clothing now makes her look fat.
3. Her music still sucks.
2003-04-29 07:24:26 PM  
You know what I think she did? I think she fell out of the ugly tree, and hit all the ugly branches on the ugly way down! HAW HAW! UGLY!

D'you get it? Ugly...! Jesus farking Christ. That joke has not been funny for many years, yet it's repeated ad nauseum by people who apparently believe that it's still humourous and original.

OK, even though she now looks half-way normal, she still chooses to pile on layers of makeup thicker than the 'ugly tree' comedians, thus still managing to keep up appearances as the America's premier pop-skank.

Thing is, there's very few genuinely ugly people in the world. Personally, I don't find her particularly attractive, and I don't even need to mention her god-awful 'music', but she's certainly not ugly.
2003-04-29 07:25:11 PM  
So she's traded in the "quasilatino blonde hyperskank slut" look for the "Corner of Hollywood & Vine brunette disease-spattered hooker slut" look.

Big deal.
2003-04-29 07:25:23 PM  
LinaLagia: I'm not hispanic, but my arms and face are nicely tanned, and the rest of me is this pasty fish-belly white. the reason? Bright Sunshine and Ski Clothes...

are you sure the dark on her face isn't all that cakey
makeup? and MickeyD's Ketchup?
2003-04-29 07:26:39 PM  
Also, I have invented new rules of grammar. I suggest you follow them from now on. Ahem.
2003-04-29 07:29:31 PM  
Thank you, Logweasel...sometimes the obvious seems to escape people.

Who here hasn't seen some chick wearing "the latest fashions" while having a big jelly roll hanging over the edge of her pants? Anyone in collge or high school should recognize this phenomenon. It doesn't matter if you make a lot of money "singing" crappy songs, if you try to be a slave to fashion, you're going to look stupid.
2003-04-29 07:31:39 PM  
Yeah, the darker appearance of her face is from her makeup. Unless you tan, the skin of your face is naturally darker than the skin on your chest. It's easy to test this; find makeup that matches your face, put some under your collarbone, and it stands out. She just needs to use a lighter foundation.
2003-04-29 07:33:04 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 07:34:33 PM  


Dee Snider is my hero...

House of Hair every Friday night!!!!

2003-04-29 07:34:54 PM  
Keep your ultra skinny blue eyed blonde haired bimbettes. Give me a cute woman who knows how to cook.

Amen brother. And if she's Asian then all the better.
2003-04-29 07:37:43 PM  
If I could plow my way through her supposed forest down there (/Durst on Stern) I'd hit it like Mark McGwire.

Christina used to be fine as hell in her first videos, ever since she tried to look like Marilyn Manson in the Lady Marmelade video I can't even look at her. She does have a pretty voice for the style of "music" she does but she needs to go away; take some time off; maybe go to rehab with Jack Osbourne.

"Did you see that new Christina Aguilera video?? I think it gave my television a V.D."...

/Tina Fey, Saturday Night Live
2003-04-29 07:37:49 PM  
ouroborus -- Okay, at 5'2, 140 would put her at a 25 or so body mass index, which according to the internet is the high terminus of the normal / average / healthy body weight. And as I said, she looks to be under 140.

Personally, I'd rather she hire a new songwriter as opposed to a stylist, but the devil is in the details, I guess. thanks for the m@d pr0pz, jackycane.
2003-04-29 07:40:52 PM  
Can you say BOTOX, Christina, I am sure you can, and apparently have several times. Anyone seen Mickie Rourke recently ? Aguilara has got that same rubbery texture going for her....MMMMM microwave chicken skin
2003-04-29 07:41:51 PM  
Who gets this reference?

And what the fark do you think
Christina Aguilera
Is doing right now?

Maybe eatin' a coont
Maybe smokin' a bowl
I wish that I could take off all her clothes
Maybe suckin' a cock,
Maybe snortin' a line
I wish that I could fark her all the time
2003-04-29 07:42:41 PM  
oh yeah the first part of my comment above was about Britney( in case you didn't already know).
2003-04-29 07:42:41 PM  
This is so sad. Really, you people need to GET A FARKING LIFE!!! And the people who wrote the article even more so. I mean, geez, people! Have you lost all farking contact with reality!?
Ugly stick? Fat? Heck, getting a little rounder only made her look better. I don't understand the farking ideal with anorectic models.
You people are so pathetic. So. Farking. Pathetic.
2003-04-29 07:43:27 PM  
NOOOO!!!!! MY GODDESS HAS DESTROYED ALL OF HER BEAUTY!!! except for her cleavegage though, that still looks great...
2003-04-29 07:44:35 PM  
Two Words--

Cindy Lauper.......
2003-04-29 07:47:50 PM  
She looks like a normal person now. I think she is beautiful in her own right. Went back to her right hair color and now has a normal woman body. Post your picture your freaks that say she is too big. what does your significant other look like?
2003-04-29 07:49:30 PM  
Just may be the latin genes kicking in...
2003-04-29 07:51:09 PM  
[image from too old to be available][image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 07:51:10 PM  
Yeah, she's skanky... Yeah, her music is questionably good...

But at least she's not starving herself like so many divas/starlets/actresses and media folks are right now...

Trust me, as someone who is weight-obsessed this is almost encouraging (except without the nose-rings and icky hair and stuff).
2003-04-29 07:51:24 PM  

Okay, she's not fat. But she certainly can't wear any of her whore outfits anymore. Rather, she shouldn't. Which is probably a good thing.

Hopefully she'll take an overdose of diet pills and we'll be searching for pictures of her corpse on ogrish.

I will, anyway.

Jesus, Calisa! Chill out. It's not like she threw baseballs at an osprey or anything!

/Wink, wink, nudge, nudge

2003-04-29 07:53:15 PM  
When we return, Christina begins channeling Anna Nicole Smith as she eats her fifth Double Quarter Pounder of the day.
/E! True Hollywood Story
2003-04-29 07:53:23 PM  
Gaaaahhhhh! Farking tag! U have shamed my honor and my family!

/commits seppeku
2003-04-29 07:54:03 PM  
I mean, have people really became so brainwashed by media that they think that everyone who weighs more than their skeleton is a flabby chubmonster?
It's sad and pathetic. You people should watch TV a bit less, and read books a bit more. Maybe you'll learn something, about others, and about yourselves.
And no, porn mags does not count as books.
2003-04-29 07:54:04 PM  
Admittedly... I'd rather gnaw through my own leg than be fat... but still...
2003-04-29 07:54:46 PM  
Give me a break. She still looks better than the majority of women I know, including me.
Comments to the contrary prove that thing about the media making everyone think people's bodies should be unnaturally thin.
Who the hell wants to fark a bag of bones, anyway?
2003-04-29 07:55:13 PM  
One more big mac and she can sing for the Dixie Chicks
2003-04-29 07:55:15 PM  
I'd work those extra pounds right off of her...
2003-04-29 07:55:38 PM  
Er, *I*. Today is not my day

/commits seppeku. Again. With a rusty sword.
2003-04-29 07:56:13 PM  
Damon, Iron, of COURSE everyone in Pittsburgh is fat. How could you not be? Primanti Brothers, The Dirty O, Dave and Andy's, Quaker Steak, etc.
2003-04-29 07:57:09 PM  
Wait, wait, wait.

My two little girls grew up with Mulan. Now I have to decultify their brains into not dressing the way Christina does because let's face it, marketing Britney and Christina has a lot of attraction over listening to dumb old dad.

And Christina is a fatty and eating and you folks think that's good and fair?

fark that. I want Christina to starve her skanky little ass again.
2003-04-29 08:01:30 PM  
I mean, have people really became so brainwashed by media that they think that everyone who weighs more than their skeleton is a flabby chubmonster?

What makes you think that all these people find supermodels attractive at all? There IS an in-between with them and Christina.

Who here hasn't seen some chick wearing "the latest fashions" while having a big jelly roll hanging over the edge of her pants? Anyone in collge or high school should recognize this phenomenon. It doesn't matter if you make a lot of money "singing" crappy songs, if you try to be a slave to fashion, you're going to look stupid.

Yes, I am forced to see stuff like this every day. It just makes me shake my head.
2003-04-29 08:02:04 PM  
Phatix "The high terminus of the normal ..."
Even if you were right, this would be equivalent to "as fat as one can be without actually being unhealthy". In other words, not so fat as to cause any problems for one's physical health.

"The average" is the statistical mean, not the optimal point. If the average woman of 5'2" weighs 140lb, then that means that most women are over their ideal weight. Being "much like everybody else" is not ideal, it's just not notable.

To me she looks about 120lb or 130lb at most. These are bad photos. But those who point to her lack of muscle tone and caked-on makeup are quite right. That's why she looks so bad. Her previous good looks came from the fact that she had a really slim, somewhat toned body and wasn't afraid to show it off. She doesn't have a stunningly pretty face like Avril Lavigne or Sandra Bullock or Halle Berry. She was hot like Pink, or Sporty Spice, or Anna Kournikova.
2003-04-29 08:03:12 PM  
The whole ho look turned me off personally. She doesnt look that horrible body wise in those pics. As others have said, at least she's eating but damn beasties.. whats happened to her head? /eye brows. That hair color is baad on her.
2003-04-29 08:04:06 PM  
but what bout li'l kim's burqua bikini?
2003-04-29 08:05:14 PM  
Golightly, I used to be the same way. If you ever care to talk, there's contact info in my bio.
2003-04-29 08:06:27 PM  
She looks fine. Who gives a fark anyway?

2003-04-29 08:06:29 PM  
I'm pround of the girl. Everybody was saying she couldnt look any worse and she goes ahead and does it. You go girlfriend.
2003-04-29 08:06:58 PM  
at least angelina jolie looks pretty much the same sans makeup, that makes me happy

except her hair looks crappy
2003-04-29 08:07:21 PM  
She doesn't have a stunningly pretty face like Avril Lavigne

I didn't know Avril had a pretty face? Have you seen her w/o makeup? She's just your average highschool sk8tergrl (no pun intented...okay maybe a little)

2003-04-29 08:09:28 PM  
I think if she lost some of the extra weight to her face, she'd look perfectly normal (and damn hot). Her body is still really good (she doesn't look like she's been gracing the Ethiopian top 40 anymore), everything's sized right...her face is just a little big. That's IT. I'd STILL hit it. Multiple times. Nightly.
2003-04-29 08:09:52 PM  
L'EnfantTerrible w00t!
2003-04-29 08:11:14 PM  
They even making dolls of her new look (NSFW)
2003-04-29 08:13:27 PM  
"You need hitting badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be hit, and often, and by someone who knows how"
2003-04-29 08:13:36 PM  
In a perfect world one would hope that a singer could make a career out of, well... singing.
'course, I don't listen to her, so I have no opinion on that so I'll just talk about her looks like everyone else. And her looks are just fine. I'd probably do a double-take on the street.
2003-04-29 08:17:06 PM  
Thanx, Jackycane... it's all good.
2003-04-29 08:17:14 PM  
Man, did she go out and got some birthin' hips, or what? Not that it's a bad thing, necessarily.
2003-04-29 08:19:07 PM  
Wow, she actually looks hispanic now. Finally.
2003-04-29 08:19:07 PM  
you people are mean. i actually like her new album because she has talent, so who cares if she weight 97 pounds instead of 95. and as for those pictures; i think they just found two situations in which her clothing choice was off. my $.02
2003-04-29 08:24:00 PM  
Excellent bio, antialias. Got any art online?
2003-04-29 08:26:29 PM  
Then again, if she dressed sensibly she'd lose a large
portion of her male audience.

Ah, the old a-large-portion-of-male-aguilera-fans-are-physically-obssessed argument. Let's not hasten to make anything big of this - after all, all male Aguilera fans are >15...
2003-04-29 08:26:44 PM  

"celebrities looking ugly??? NO WAY!!!


pepito pea

ask and ye shall receive.....(totally nsfw)


(i'm going to hell)
2003-04-29 08:30:11 PM  
A very simple idea, it seems many, many are missing here. How can you tell if she is ugly unless she's stark nude and un-made up, and standing in front of you?

And if that were the case, I'm sure more than one of you of the "ugly, I wouldn't hit it" opinion would change it very quickly.

Sad to say, but I guess I have grown up - give me a plain looking woman, with a little meat on her, who's interested in being a good person, and she's way hotter than todays bleached blonde, enhanced flesh peddler of the day, to me at least.
2003-04-29 08:31:01 PM  
And smoking no less....
2003-04-29 08:31:53 PM  
Went back to her right hair color and now has a normal woman body.

Actually, it said somewhere on her official site that her natural colour is blonde. (Orangeglow told me... I swear... heh heh heh...)

Maybe its just me, but I think the dark hair looks completely farked up on her.

And as for her body - if she gets some normal woman clothes that fit her then she'll probably be cute again.
2003-04-29 08:33:01 PM  

Stupid fashion mavens think anyone who weighs over 97 pounds is fat. Christina Aguilera may dress skanky, but she's not fat. Jesus Christ.

While I agree with your sentiment wholeheartedly I find the notion of anyone calling your average Fark forum poster a 'fashion maven' hilarious beyond belief.
2003-04-29 08:41:15 PM  

I predict the father is................. . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . .. . . . . . a Fred Durst
2003-04-29 08:42:10 PM  
Pearly8067so who cares if she weight 97 pounds instead of 95

She deinitely weighs a bit more than 95 pounds. Considering Britney weighs 135.. (Well, she did before she started to gain a little weight.)
2003-04-29 08:43:39 PM  

It looks like Christina picked the wrong week to give up heroin! Somebody hook her up with some Afghani Flake before her career ends!!!

\ remember kids....don't do drugs, stay in school.
2003-04-29 08:44:22 PM  
so, what are the odds of NSFW pics of her?

Yeah, I know...skeezy ho, but what are ya gonna do?
2003-04-29 08:50:30 PM  

'She needs to hit the gym, and go on a diet. And go back to being blonde. Very few girls can pull off the brunette/black hair thing.'

Hmm... maybe someone should tell all the women of africa, asia, plus all the native americans and south americans that? Not to mention all the italians, greek... oh what's the farking use. That comment is so stupid it sort of makes fun of itself. I'll just quote you again and let everyone laugh at their own jokes.

'She needs to hit the gym, and go on a diet. And go back to being blonde. Very few girls can pull off the brunette/black hair thing.'

And secondly...

'We all want the blue eyed, blonde hair girl.'

No we don't all want anything... much less the blue-eyed blonde haired girl. Good of you to presume to speak for each and every member of your gender though.
2003-04-29 08:53:50 PM  
I hate skinny girls. I need something to grab on to. Don't care for her face much, but she finally has a healthy-looking body.

I wonder how many of the guys who post on here saying they like skinny girls have big old nasty beer guts and what not.
2003-04-29 08:57:38 PM  
So I guess all the farkers who always say she's too skinny/ wears too much makeup should be all over her now.. right? Right?
2003-04-29 09:02:32 PM  
What a bunch of farkwits you are. A girl gains some wieght, and you pounce like a pack of jackels
2003-04-29 09:03:23 PM  
Phase 1: Gain Weight
Phase 2:
Phase 3: Profit!
2003-04-29 09:05:49 PM  
Nice to know PaganPoetry... and as long as I can not make out the details of your hip bones when you bend at the waist then we will have to talk.

There is nothing worse then spearing yourself on some girls hip bones.
2003-04-29 09:09:45 PM  
What the fark are you people complaining about?

Like the previous poster said, people yakked that she's too skinny and shows a wrong body image for girls to look up to.

Now that she's changed that, people are now complaining that she's too fat. The sitting pic shows a bit of a spare tire.

I like women with meat on their bones. I would still proudly hit it(with an STD test first).
2003-04-29 09:11:06 PM  

'Sad to say, but I guess I have grown up - give me a plain looking woman, with a little meat on her, who's interested in being a good person, and she's way hotter than todays bleached blonde, enhanced flesh peddler of the day, to me at least.'

I think you are only wrong about one thing... that isn't sad to say. I think 90% of the fark guys who drool over every perfectly lit, heavily made-up, airbrushed woman who shows up here fit into two categories:

1) Never/almost never been with an actual woman. Ideas of what's appealing based entirely on internet porn and old VIP episodes. Nonetheless, constant unsolicited remarks about what he would/wouldn't hit.

or perhaps even sadder...

2) With a woman who is probably quite average; that is to say - very attractive to someone that appreciates her. Constantly drools over unobtainable fantasy women in magazines and porn. Needlessly makes actual woman feel inadequate, makes self feel dissapointed. Woman probably eventually tires of being made to feel second class, otherwise nice girl may find herself in bed with the first man who actually finds her very sexy...
2003-04-29 09:12:34 PM  
I saw that the background of one of the pics said GLAAD and saw on her "official" site that she was received an award.. so I went to or whatever and saw the photos there of her:

this and this.... that really is her...

2003-04-29 09:13:04 PM  
"On the next Jerry Springer"...
[image from too old to be available]
"Mama, make daddy quit grabbing my ass"
2003-04-29 09:19:37 PM  
Amen Wmichaelis! i concur.

/back to kitten killin
2003-04-29 09:20:09 PM  
I wouldn't hit it. And I never would have; she can sing, but she a ho.

2003-04-29 09:23:53 PM  
Every day is so wonderful, then suddenly,
It's hard to breathe
Now and then, I get insecure from all the pain
I'm so ashamed

I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down, oh no
So, don't you bring me down today

-Christina Aguilera "Beautiful"
2003-04-29 09:33:24 PM  
lol, you guys fell for the crappiest photoshop job, ever.

how sad
2003-04-29 09:33:36 PM  
Hey, can someone post her beside Dee Snider?

Or that one picture of her with the hat... that would be clever...
2003-04-29 09:34:45 PM  

I'm in bus 6661666 seat 68 - which seat number do you have?

I think that I was right behind you.

/// completely agrees agrees with the fact that all who look at that picture are going to hell
2003-04-29 09:39:55 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

"In So\/iet Ru$$ia, Christina Aguilera gives full beating to the ugly stick!"

"And I'd still hit it. What a country!"
2003-04-29 09:45:26 PM  
Is it just me,,, or is that NOT HER! Those pics are not her, this is bs. You ppl are easy.
2003-04-29 09:49:15 PM  
Not sure what to say here...ok, maybe she's tired of the comparisons to the "other blonde bimbos". Truth is I'd rather hit Vanessa Carlton over and over until my wood wears out. Smarter, writes her own material, funnier, sexier, and plays the piano with the best.

As for the "no makeup" pics...

We had this gal at my office some time around the early Middle Ages who did some modeling for a local department store chain. To see her without make up she was just another slightly homely college chick. With the make up...holy farking christ smoking hot!

So cut Christina some slack...and look for the "come back tour with a thinner Christina" soon.

2003-04-29 09:52:41 PM  
You guys are terrible! Just because a girl suddenly weighs a NORMAL weight doesn't mean they are ugly! Magazines and supermodels all exaggerate a girls natural curves and makes you believe that thats how the human female should look. The only thing I don't like in those pictures is her black hair...thats kinda creepy lookin', or maybe greasy or something.

*runs away*
2003-04-29 09:56:12 PM  
No, I don't like her music.

Yes, I think she's a skank.

No, I don't think she's fat.

Lay off, you Farking Idiots. To quote Pulp Fiction, "How strange that what are pleasing to the touch and pleasing to the eye are seldom the same." You want that bony, anorexic, prepubescent look, but I can guarantee you that having your hands full of curves is the touch you need. And obviously a fair amount of you haven't had it, if you're still bashing any woman that ain't bony.

Yeah, her music sucks. But think twice before you say you wouldn't hit it, even with the ugly stick. If she could learn to mediate her figure with her choices in clothing and makeup, you might all be singing a different tune. She might be too, a better one that wasn't some shiatty pop track.

And the fact a certain crop of you wants the prepubescent, 16 year old Christina look back is just farking sick. Meet some real women. Who work out, who eat decently, and who aren't permanent fixtures in your image index.

(/done pissing off fellow Farkers)
2003-04-29 10:06:18 PM  
I think what people are failing to acknowledge is that we hold sex objects to a different standard than real human beings.

Christina and Britney have made themselves into sex objects, so we're evaluating them on those terms.
2003-04-29 10:07:40 PM  
i can't believe i am going out on a shaky limb to defend this skank, but....
i gotta go with the pregnancy theory. She never had those breasts before. Someone got some booty on valentine's...paging mr. timberlake? probably not though. she's dating some boring manager type

/incriminating self with US mag research, hangs head in shame.
2003-04-29 10:11:17 PM  

Just to prove she wasn't ALWAYS so scary-looking...

[image from too old to be available]

[image from too old to be available]

That said, it doesn't bother me she's gained weight (i'm also thinking pregnant)... it's the fact she's obviously screwed around with her hair and face so damn much she's ruined herself. It's a shame...

2003-04-29 10:13:21 PM  
So what if she gained some weight, I'll still hit it.
2003-04-29 10:14:31 PM  
Looks like she fell out of the ugly tree, hit every branch on the way down, got beat with the ugly stick, Hot hit by the ugly car and finally shot herself with an ugly gun.
2003-04-29 10:17:18 PM  
Her face is a little too chubby (round). Otherwise nice.
2003-04-29 10:17:46 PM  
She looked skinny just a couple of months ago. There are only a few ways that somebody gains weight that fast -- 1) pregnant, 2) glandular disorder (Cushing's disease, hypothyroidism), or 3) she's on steroid meds for some other disease, like lupus. You REALLY have to eat to put on weight like that -- DeNiro had to forcefeed himself milkshakes and ice cream to play Al Capone in "The Untouchables".
2003-04-29 10:18:20 PM  
I'd hit it like she stole sumthin.
2003-04-29 10:24:33 PM  
maybe she got the number of michael jackson's "plastic" surgeon...
ugh. can't tear myself away from thread. like watching a train wreck...or the new jlo video. asstastic....
2003-04-29 10:30:53 PM  
It could be worse...
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 10:32:09 PM  
Wow...I guess I'm the odd one. I think those pictures (except the first one, but I blame the photographer) are great. She looks so SO much better now than she did before. I wouldn't have hit it in the past, but now I would just hit it...I'd punch her in the farking eye.
2003-04-29 10:32:43 PM  
*wouldn't just hit it....

farking hands.
2003-04-29 10:40:07 PM  
BlindMan: Oh, I meant the author of the article, not "average Farkers." Hee.
2003-04-29 10:45:16 PM  
she looks like mimi from drew carey in a couple of those pictures, especially from the dee snider days.
2003-04-29 10:46:04 PM  
more "Oh My God What Happened to Them" pics courtesy of TSG (could be a good contest!)

Yasime Bleeth:
[image from too old to be available]
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 10:47:46 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
At least she doesn't look like Hedwig anymore. Ugh.
2003-04-29 10:52:34 PM  
The main issue here is that Christina has made herself completely unrecognizeable. That said, close examination indicates she's always had wide hips, the shot in the white cleavage holder is probably one of the best of hers I've ever seen, and she should have gone back to brunette a long time ago.

And count me in on the "pregnant" speculators as well...
2003-04-29 10:52:38 PM  
I don't know what you guys are talking about. She looks about 1000 times better then the last pics I saw of her with the blonde braided hair. Maybe she got hit with the reality stick.
2003-04-29 10:53:32 PM  
She is, after all, a Hispanic woman. Have you seen most Hispanic women past the age of 22? They look like balloons at the Macy's parade. The only thing missing is control ropes tied to their hands and feet.

That many carbs and no exercise has to be bad on the body. Plus, I think she is preggers.

By the way, I love Hispanic women. I think Xtina looks like she should not like her image stylists want her to look.
2003-04-29 10:54:14 PM  
sorry, here's the Yasmine you remember from Baywatch, not the Yasmine in line at the methadone clinic:

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 11:05:19 PM  
I, for one, would hit back then and I'd hit it now.

Here's some recent pics from AP:

[image from too old to be available]
Christina Aguilera walks the red carpet where fashion designer Jeremy Scott unveiled his fall collection, Thursday night, April 3, 2003, in Los Angeles. Aguilera is wearing one of Scott's designs. (AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)

Singer Christina Aguilera receives a special award from the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation for including gay and transgender images in her music video for the song "Beautiful," at the 14th annual GLAAD Media Awards at the Kodak Theatre in Los Angeles on Saturday, April 26, 2003. At right is presenter Dave LaChapelle. (AP Photo/Jill Connelly)
2003-04-29 11:06:15 PM  
Is anyone surprised that Yasmine Bleeth turns out looking like just what she is? That being:

A dirty burned out old stripper?

I hate to tell you guys, but the cheap girls you lust after today turn out like that in real life. Say all you want about societal double standards... blah blah blah, but find a classy woman (note: taking off clothes for money=not classy), if you want to avoid being with an embarrassing no-longer-hot hag like this.
2003-04-29 11:09:06 PM  
Also, this photo ... (supposed to be above?)
[image from too old to be available]
Singer Christina Aguilera receives a special award from the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation for including gay and transgender images in her music video for the song "Beautiful," at the 14th annual GLAAD Media Awards at the Kodak Theatre in Los Angeles on Saturday, April 26, 2003. At right is presenter Dave LaChapelle. (AP Photo/Jill Connelly)
2003-04-29 11:14:03 PM  
Didn't anyone else see her on SNL a few weeks back and freak out then? She was sporting much of this extra weight then, but the boobies didn't look as nice...
2003-04-29 11:14:49 PM  
Photoisland at it again?:
2003-04-29 11:16:37 PM  
Wow, for once I can say I'm the same size as Christina Aguilera. Not like I ever wanted to be stick skinny anyways... healthy yes, frail and bony no. I'm fat so I know what a fat tummy looks like.. I don't think she's pregnant.
2003-04-29 11:17:17 PM  
Cut and Paste it:​9.jpg
2003-04-29 11:18:46 PM  
Hey farkettes, I don't think the farkers are knocking Christina's weight to be mean. We are guys and we do like curvaceous ladies. I think the weight comments are a knee jerk reaction to the fact that 'stina always looked like she need a sandwich or two, and now all of a sudden she looks like she not only cleaned out hell's kitchen but ate the soup nazi too. I'm still not certain that is really her....

2003-04-29 11:23:35 PM  
I think black hair is rad on her.
Although the pics other than the close up look like shiatty photoshop jobs.
2003-04-29 11:23:54 PM  
At least she's made some of her fans happy.
2003-04-29 11:24:24 PM  
"more "Oh My God What Happened to Them" pics courtesy of TSG (could be a good contest!)"

I like it, should have enabled voting, here's my entries;

From this:
[image from too old to be available]

to this:
[image from too old to be available]

And also...

[image from too old to be available]

Came from this:
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-29 11:57:24 PM  

[image from too old to be available]

Lots more pics here:​ex.php
2003-04-30 12:06:40 AM  
My 2 cents

She's a dirty skank. Plain and simple. Her music sucks. She was marginally cute back in the 'Genie in a Bottle' or what the hell ever that song was a few summers back, ever since that skanktastic video with the rest of those MTV skanks was where she started to take a shiat.
2003-04-30 12:17:02 AM  
maybe she had an allergic reaction to something
2003-04-30 12:20:26 AM  
Christina is hot as a soggy McDonald's french fry.

That is all.
2003-04-30 12:32:55 AM  
Man, that's too bad. Oh well..... there's always Shakira! *unf unf*
2003-04-30 12:41:50 AM  
I think this image needs to be posted one more time:

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-30 12:44:01 AM  
I forgot to add the necessary: /sarcasm.
2003-04-30 01:00:06 AM  
let me be the first to write 'hahahahahahahaha'

nevermind the 350 posts before mine.
2003-04-30 01:00:13 AM  
VonDada: "she is, after all, a Hispanic woman."

She's half SPANISH,which isn't the same as "hispanic". Hispanic refers to the native people of mexico/south america who happen to speak spanish because we beat the living crap out of them during the spanish conquest.

/blonde-haired,blue-eyed spaniard.
2003-04-30 01:08:44 AM  
It's the ugly ass VEST that's causing the problems, the VEEESSSTTT!!!!! She needs a makeup/clothes stylist who DOESN'T hate her and will make her look good.
2003-04-30 01:20:27 AM  
Uh, so she's dyed her hair and put on a bit of weight. Not that amazing.
2003-04-30 01:23:08 AM  
Watch me not care
2003-04-30 01:24:25 AM  

cause she was hot before..

or something
2003-04-30 01:26:57 AM  
[image from too old to be available] THIS is beautiful. X-tina...go home. You're done. But first please scrape off about ten pounds of that crud you've slathered over your face, head on over to Gold's Gym and here, eat a carrot.
2003-04-30 01:29:32 AM  
Rebelhead: Okay, okay. Hispanglish then. Geez.

Or, maybe Latinaish? Mexicish?
2003-04-30 01:40:26 AM  
I would just like to say fark you to rebelhead.
That is all.
2003-04-30 01:42:32 AM  
To me, it seems like a satire on how quickly looks can turn around people's view of you and your work.

But I'd hit it now, even more. She brings the padding, I'll give her more pudding in return.

/Possessed by her strange sexiness
2003-04-30 01:45:36 AM  
Who gives a crap if shes put on a few pounds, shes still far from fat, and shes still hot. Personaly I think the new look is certainly better than her last stint as a Dee Snider double. Consider this a few mounds of clay shes put on to carve herself a killer body with more T&A than last time. As for thinking she might be pregnant- yeah that looks like a possibility, given her fun bags suddenly look like they've got more groceries in them.
2003-04-30 01:48:34 AM  
VonDada No, no Mexicish. Shes part Ecuadorian (as in, from Ecuador) so its Ecuadorish.........or something ,yeah.
2003-04-30 01:54:39 AM  
Lots of criticism floating about .. I suggest you look at yourselves before running your collective mouths off at her. She's still just a human being for god's sake!