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(Some Pussy)   Cops don't buy cat-shoots-teen story   ( divider line
    More: Followup  
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10115 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Apr 2003 at 5:58 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

89 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-04-28 12:52:42 PM  
They are spending way to much time on this investigation.
2003-04-28 01:00:44 PM  
The cat was "jumping up and down around on the gun"? Yeah, they do that.
2003-04-28 05:05:11 PM  
Frank_Lee_Mental: The cat was "jumping up and down around on the gun"? Yeah, they do that.

I've seen a 10lb adult male cat from a standing start jump 6+ feet straight up. I recon coming down he'd have enough force on any given paw to cock and fire a single-action revolver.

Of course, the odds of this actually happening are roughly the same as a dozen such cats flying out of my butt during a turkey shoot.

And all in Ohio. Why, God? Why? Are You still pissed about the river-on-fire thing?
2003-04-28 05:06:01 PM  
Was there a grassy knoll nearby? I smell a conspiracy. Yeah, that's it, a second shooter explains everything, the cat was just a patsy.
2003-04-28 06:02:42 PM  
Maybe the cat was cleaning the gun and it just went off?
2003-04-28 06:03:59 PM  
When I was a kid, my cat ate my homework... boy times are a changin'.
2003-04-28 06:04:29 PM  
maybe the cat was trying to commit suicide to get away from its inbred, redneck family.
2003-04-28 06:05:21 PM  
Yeah, my cat's constantly playing with my 50 Caliber Desert Eagle. I hate it when he does that.
2003-04-28 06:05:31 PM  
Uh Yeah Mom Uh Dad yeah we were somewhere else and heard him Uh yell and We Uh came to see what was wrong.

What? Uh No, I think the cat shot him.
2003-04-28 06:05:57 PM  
Guns don't kill people. Cats jumping up and down on guns kill people.
2003-04-28 06:07:25 PM  
The cat was just trying to get revenge for that scene in "Boondock Saints". Yeah, you know the one I mean.
2003-04-28 06:07:37 PM  
Who the fark cares - it was just a pellet gun.

Although the 'pellet' apparently made an exit wound? Ouch.
2003-04-28 06:07:41 PM  
Next up, a cat that jumps up and down on the "on" button of an electric chainsaw.
2003-04-28 06:08:12 PM  
My cat stole the neighbor's watch--but it wasn't an armed robbery!
2003-04-28 06:08:23 PM  
Cats jumping up and down on guns don't kill people. People who own cats who jump up and down on guns kill people.
2003-04-28 06:08:44 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-28 06:09:26 PM  
Ok, Moriarty's got the best line on this so far...
2003-04-28 06:09:40 PM  
...or, cats who mistake their owne^H^H^H^H^Hservants for flaming, feathered gazelle...
2003-04-28 06:10:42 PM  
For our next story, man bites dog, gets cut in half when dog learns how to use minigun ...
2003-04-28 06:11:14 PM  
I'll bet the cat was stoned on pot.
2003-04-28 06:14:52 PM  
Well, the guy called him a pussy, so he shot.
2003-04-28 06:16:03 PM  
My cat shot my wife 6 times.

Cheatin' biatch deserved it.
2003-04-28 06:16:49 PM  
Just wait for all the copycat pellet gun shootings!
2003-04-28 06:18:13 PM  
If this kid has nothing better to do than shoot at rats with a pellet gun, why do they bother having the cat around? Or better yet, why bother shooting at rats if you own a cat? Isn't killing rats what they're good at?
2003-04-28 06:21:18 PM  
Cat got your tongue?
Nah, he shot me.
2003-04-28 06:21:19 PM  
No no no, the cat was just upset about the boy masturbating too much. Every time rednecks with air rifles shoot a rat, kittens kill a redneck.
2003-04-28 06:22:28 PM  
back and to the left...back adn to the left...
2003-04-28 06:27:20 PM  
If the cat had shot him with a frog-gun, I might believe it. But then the cat would have probably eaten the ballistic evidence.
2003-04-28 06:30:00 PM  
If they can train that cat to kill snails, I'll buy it!
2003-04-28 06:30:23 PM  
If more people spent less time working and more time looking at porn and killing kittens, these things wouldn't happen.
2003-04-28 06:35:04 PM  
I'll just hang out here and lick the cats' ass.....

/I got nothin'
2003-04-28 06:37:42 PM  
This reminds me of the opening part of Bowling for Columbine. There were these 2 hunters taking pictures of a dog with a hunting vest on...One of the guys thought it would be funnier to put the rifle over the dogs shoulder

So they did it, and the dog moved, the rifle fell, and one of the guys got it in the leg

Funny shiat
2003-04-28 06:38:33 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-28 06:41:25 PM  
Oh, and I only post this next pic because it came up on my GIS for "scary cat" and when I saw it I almost shiat myself:

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-28 06:44:11 PM  
I'd buy that for a dollar!

Wait...what are we talking about again?
2003-04-28 06:44:36 PM  
I can't believe I almost got away with blaming it on the cat!

[image from too old to be available]

Behold I am the crazzzy eyed pug.
2003-04-28 06:48:17 PM  

Ahahahaha, that was so dumb, but I almost pissed myself!

/still laughing
2003-04-28 06:51:52 PM  
wait just a second... why are they trying to cover up the accedental shooting? If they are family... why would tyr press charges?
2003-04-28 06:57:58 PM  
I think it's pretty obvious that the kid shot himself in the back.
2003-04-28 06:58:01 PM  
So, what exactly are they saying? That the family shot the boy? Because I seriously don't see how he could have shot himself with a rifle in the back.
2003-04-28 07:00:57 PM  
There is nothing funny about murderous pugs with w0nky eyes.
2003-04-28 07:03:04 PM  
At first I thought he was a crybaby for getting shot with a pellet gun and needing to go to the hospital, but entered his back, grazed his ribcage then exited. jebus.
2003-04-28 07:03:40 PM  
I thought about it a bit more, on second thought, he's a crybaby.
2003-04-28 07:04:23 PM  
It's so obvious. Who has the motive here? The kid was shooting rats. Rats wanted revenge, but they needed a scapegoat. In comes the cat. Good thing rats are dumb, otherwise they might have got away with it.
2003-04-28 07:05:02 PM  
I want to know how the cat was able to Pump the gun first.
2003-04-28 07:06:32 PM  
Cops are now Physicists


Not simply M.
Christ what dipshiats.
Take them to Cookeville Tennessee and just shoot the cat.
2003-04-28 07:09:28 PM  
They need to get the cat examined for signs of molestation. From what I read on FARK, there seems to be a lot of that going around lately. If the cat has been abused by the boy, he has a motive. seizes his opportunity, and BLAM! A BB to the ribs!

See if the cat has a smile on his face when he's questioned by police.
2003-04-28 07:09:48 PM  
Fair enough, Cardinarky, but there's some reasonable assumptions about the maximum velocity of a cat. Odds are that it wasn't traveling 60 mph when/if it hit the trigger.
2003-04-28 07:10:13 PM  
My dog really did eat my homework though.
2003-04-28 07:13:10 PM  
How would you feel if you had to sh*t in the same box day after day while your owners use a flushing contraption device thingy?
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