That sudden stop always gets ya.

B-b-b-but "Graviteh" is JUST A THEORY!!1! like "Evil-lution" and "hell-iocentricicsm"!!!!2

Witnesses say Luter appeared to attempt to cut his malfunctioning canopy away around 300 feet.

I've been trying to think of a comment to go with this, but somehow I got nothin'.

He should have just jumped up at the last moment.

Hayes believes Luter may have become incapacitated immediately after opening.

Oh, sure. Blame the old man for this.

dj_bigbird: "I'd rather burn in at 200 mph than to eat it in a car accident. I mean, that's a really dumb way to go."

Truman Sparks, FTW!

"Let me see a good, hard arch, man."

Ah yes. Deceleration trauma.

I bet his kids grounded him.

*rage comic*

Frame 1: THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT! I FARKING LOVE SKYDIVING!!!

Frame 2: *Attempts to open parachute fails*

Frame 3: FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

Frame 4: SPLAT

Isn't the whole point of engaging in thrill-seeking hobbies that there's a risk that you will not come out of it safely?

Yeah, there's the high when it all goes well.

But then there's the downside as well.

/bounce

I tried sky diving once. Twas awesome. Expensive hobby though.

Bravo sub!

'' She's a goooood girl... Loves her maaama... ''

TADA!*thud*

FTA: "We suspect at least early on he was incapacitated or even unconscious. He may have had an extremely hard opening or something like that, but then at about 300 feet, he did cut away," Hayes said.

The accident put a damper on what was to be the start of a fun-filled weekend with good weather, something that's been in short supply this winter.


It's things like this that make me seriously wonder why ecstasy, cannabis and cocaine aren't legal.

"Whoa, he died? Well, we can't let ourselves get down.....WOO HOO!!! "

Forgetting to open a parachute is one hell of a senior moment.

Would have been more interesting if the headline were half as long and there weren't hyphens and apostrophes in the right places.

"69 year old skydivers..."

styckx: When is our socialist government finally going to strike out and bring forth gravity to stand trial for the lifetimes of murder it has committed? WHEN WILL THE KILLING STOP HUH?

dj_bigbird: styckx: When is our socialist government finally going to strike out and bring forth gravity to stand trial for the lifetimes of murder it has committed? WHEN WILL THE KILLING STOP HUH?

You farking Glenn Beck worshipping neo-con fool. It's George Bush's fault for not pressing harder with the Kyoto Treaty to stop Global Warming! If he'd done his part, Mother Gaia would not be punishing people like this!

Fark is in its death throes.

Is this kind of like how Bernie Madoff's golden parachute failed to open?

Seems a year or so ago I read of a professional skydiving photographer forgetting to put his chute on.

Yep he jumped.

Know of one successful ejection go awry over Misawa winter 1952-3 time frame. He did not fasten the leg straps. All was well 'til his chute opened. Found him that summer.

King Something: B-b-b-but "Graviteh" is JUST A THEORY!!1! like "Evil-lution" and "hell-iocentricicsm"!!!!2

It is called the theory of gravity because we don't really understand how or why gravity works. Something they discovered not too long ago is that gravity is faster than light. As far as they can tell it is instant. As in if you change the mass of object A the change in the pull of gravity upon object B is measurable instantly regardless of the distance between A and B (as long as the two are close enough for there to be any measurable gravitational pull).

So yes, they know that objects with a measurable mass will pull other objects towards them but they really don't understand what gravity is, why it works, or even how it will work in every situation. For now they only have theories.

Not the first senior mishap while skydiving? *Cackle* Link (new window)

News peoples trying to explain how skydiving works or feels makes me feels fuzzy in my pants. Yes, i'm on diggerstones.

It's not the jump that gets ya...

"Hilary Banks! Will...you...marry.............."

This was no accident. The death panels are already in action.

"
There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying.
The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Pick a nice day, it suggests, and try it.
The first part is easy.
All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself forward with all your weight, and willingness not to mind that it's going to hurt.
That is, it's going to hurt if you fail to miss the ground.
Most people fail to miss the ground, and if they are really trying properly, the likelihood is that they will fail to miss it fairly hard.
Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.
One problem is that you have to miss the ground accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to miss the ground because you won't. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway there, so that you are no longer thinking about falling, or about the ground, or about how much it's going to hurt if you fail to miss it.
It is notoriously difficult to prise your attention away from these three things during the split second you have at your disposal. Hence most people's failure, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport.
If, however, you are lucky enough to have your attention momentarily distracted at the crucial moment by, say, a gorgeous pair of legs (tentacles, pseudopodia, according to phyllum and/or personal inclination) or a bomb going off in your vicinity, or by suddenly spotting an extremely rare species of beetle crawling along a nearby twig, then in your astonishment you will miss the ground completely and remain bobbing just a few inches above it in what might seem to be a slightly foolish manner.
This is a moment for superb and delicate concentration.
Bob and float, float and bob.
Ignore all considerations of your own weight and simply let yourself waft higher.
Do not listen to what anybody says to you at this point because they are unlikely to say anything helpful.
They are most likely to say something along the lines of, 'Good God, you can't possibly be flying!'
It is vitally important not to believe them or they will suddenly be right.
Waft higher and higher.
Try a few swoops, gentle ones at first, then drift above the treetops breathing regularly.
DO NOT WAVE AT ANYBODY.
When you have done this a few times you will find the moment of distraction rapidly becomes easier and easier to achieve.
You will then learn all sorts of things about how to control your flight, your speed, your manoeuvrability, and the trick usually lies in not thinking too hard about whatever you want to do, but just allowing it to happen as if it was going to anyway.
You will also learn about how to land properly, which is something you will almost certainly cock up, and cock up badly, on your first attempt.
There are private flying clubs you can join which help you achieve the all-important moment of distraction. They hire people with surprising bodies or opinions to leap out from behind bushes and exhibit and/or explain them at the critical moments. Few genuine hitch-hikers will be able to afford to join these clubs, but some may be able to get temporary employment at them.
"

I hate when that happens.

styckx: When is our socialist government finally going to strike out and bring forth gravity to stand trial for the lifetimes of murder it has committed? WHEN WILL THE KILLING STOP HUH?

Taxing gravity is listed in the new "Health Care and Education Reform" bill.

Hacker_X: King Something: B-b-b-but "Graviteh" is JUST A THEORY!!1! like "Evil-lution" and "hell-iocentricicsm"!!!!2

It is called the theory of gravity because we don't really understand how or why gravity works. Something they discovered not too long ago is that gravity is faster than light. As far as they can tell it is instant. As in if you change the mass of object A the change in the pull of gravity upon object B is measurable instantly regardless of the distance between A and B (as long as the two are close enough for there to be any measurable gravitational pull).


So how do you change the mass of an object anyway?

/Live fast, die instantly.

FTA
The accident put a damper on what was to be the start of a fun-filled weekend with good weather,

Ya think?

Meh.

I would have positioned myself for a karate roll almost at the point of impact and used my feet to push off as I hit the ground.

I would have rolled for about 20 meters, stood up, dusted myself off, lit up one of my smokes and made my way back up for another dive.

That's how you do it, gramps.

Gravity:

Now part of the Axis of Evil.

"The accident put a damper on what was to be the start of a fun-filled weekend with good weather, something that's been in short supply this winter."


That's a damper, man.

ZEPHYRHILLS sounds like an STD, not the kind of name I would assign to a city

GungFu: Meh.

I would have positioned myself for a karate roll almost at the point of impact and used my feet to push off as I hit the ground.

I would have rolled for about 20 meters, stood up, dusted myself off, lit up one of my smokes and made my way back up for another dive.

That's how you do it, gramps.

Would pay $20 to watch you fail miserably.

/skydiver

ya, i heard that last steps a dousy