Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(KSBY)   March Madness a popular time for vasectomies   (ksby.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing, vasectomies  
•       •       •

4889 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Mar 2010 at 8:33 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



59 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2010-03-17 06:23:02 PM  
2 words: Spring Break.
 
2010-03-17 06:32:27 PM  
The article mentions the Super Bowl is popular as well, which seems like a waste... it is only one night, and with the communal party atmosphere around the game, your non-sporting wife is probably going to be fine with you watching, if not at the party herself.

First weekend of March Madness seems to make much more sense.... 2-4 days of recovery where you'll just want to sit and rest anyway. I'm going to have to remember that down the road.
 
2010-03-17 06:33:49 PM  
If you're gonna spend a few days riding shotgun on a bag of frozen peas, then you might as well do it when there's something good on.

/went hiking the day after my vasectomy, poor choice
 
2010-03-17 07:32:06 PM  
Damn. I wish I had thought of that earlier and put in for time off work.
 
2010-03-17 07:44:14 PM  
Meh, I'm not all that into basketball, so I had mine during the beginning of the NFL pre-season. That way once the regular season started enough time would have gone by to allow gettin' back to gettin' busy.

After all, even once you recover you gotta allow time for the swimmers to clear out lest an 'accident' happen.
 
2010-03-17 08:36:24 PM  
old story is old...I've been hearing this kinda thing since high school.
 
2010-03-17 08:36:39 PM  

March Madness a popular time for vasectomies


March, April - vas the deferens?
 
2010-03-17 08:39:54 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: March Madness a popular time for vasectomies


March, April - vas the deferens?


Oy. Just... Oy.
 
2010-03-17 08:40:30 PM  
Hey this goes perfectly along with the summer rape season, at least if you rape someone, you won't get them preggy lol!
 
2010-03-17 08:41:26 PM  
"If I do this for her, she better shut the fark up and let me watch the farkin' games!"
 
2010-03-17 08:44:32 PM  
Cowed men, are cowed.
 
2010-03-17 08:45:48 PM  
I got mine on March 25 two years ago. Had nothing to do with sporting events, however...just a desire to fark and not make babies.

/2 is enough
 
2010-03-17 08:51:35 PM  
Is Drew getting one?
 
2010-03-17 08:53:28 PM  

Mensan: "If I do this for her, she better shut the fark up and let me watch the farkin' games!"


This. Actually, this is a wonderful opportunity for negotiations.

Weaps: After all, even once you recover you gotta allow time for the swimmers to clear out lest an 'accident' happen.


For example, you can ask your wife to assist in "clearing out the pipes" (as the doctors would like you to do, thirty times before going for the lab test) whilst wearing that special outfit, and the sparkly red lipstick... After all, you are doing this for her, and for the marriage.
 
2010-03-17 08:58:34 PM  
After 4 kids, I signed up for Fark 9 years ago, right after I got snipped. Thus my handle ;-)
 
2010-03-17 09:01:02 PM  
Hmm.. I had mine in the morning, and was good to go (except for sex) that evening. As long as I didn't do anything as stupid as sit on them, there weren't any issues.

The sutures were annoying and pokey, but they fell off within a week.

--Carlos V.

/3-4 days? Whatta bunch of pansies *grin*
 
2010-03-17 09:04:26 PM  
This isn't news -- I'm getting mine done tomorrow, and had it scheduled 4 months out -- nothing like 3 days of sitting on the couch with little-to-no movement while eating snack food and watching basketball.
 
2010-03-17 09:05:09 PM  
Every local station has had this story on a newscast I've seen today. I should have known it was cumming to Fark soon.
 
2010-03-17 09:12:07 PM  
I did not have health care so I used a Slap Chop for a homemade version.

i652.photobucket.com
 
2010-03-17 09:13:03 PM  

Monkey: I got mine on March 25 two years ago. Had nothing to do with sporting events, however...just a desire to fark and not make babies.

/2 is enough


Or is it?

www.timemachinetoys.com
 
2010-03-17 09:14:23 PM  

dletter: it is only one night, and with the communal party atmosphere around the game, your non-sporting wife is probably going to be fine with you watching, if not at the party herself.


Whoa whoa whoa... there's no wives at superbowl parties.
 
2010-03-17 09:16:16 PM  

jingks: dletter: it is only one night, and with the communal party atmosphere around the game, your non-sporting wife is probably going to be fine with you watching, if not at the party herself.

Whoa whoa whoa... there's no wives at superbowl parties.


Fark that noise, i love me some hot wings, booze and football...
 
2010-03-17 09:20:57 PM  
I listen to places advertise for vasectomies specifically for this time of year.
 
2010-03-17 09:21:03 PM  

cookiefleck: Fark that noise, i love me some hot wings, booze and football...


you know how you sound? ;)
 
2010-03-17 09:21:45 PM  
I got mine two days before I had to play football for my junior collage.
It was not a fun game.
 
2010-03-17 09:22:20 PM  

jingks: cookiefleck: Fark that noise, i love me some hot wings, booze and football...

you know how you sound? ;)


Awesome?
 
2010-03-17 09:26:38 PM  
img697.imageshack.us
 
2010-03-17 09:30:10 PM  

Big Dave: I got mine two days before I had to play football for my junior collage.
It was not a fun game.


What a Junior Collage might look like:

cybernetnews.com

/Hot like collage break
 
2010-03-17 09:30:14 PM  

jingks: Whoa whoa whoa... there's no wives at superbowl parties.


...says the guy who apparently has no friends with hot wives. Hell, my last Super Bowl party I went to had a couple consisting of two wives present. And they probably know football better than most Farkers.
 
2010-03-17 09:51:16 PM  
As someone who has had a vasectomy, I can only say one thing...

wish I would have thought of that.
 
2010-03-17 09:55:25 PM  
Scheduled mine for early May, then watched the first episode of the second season of Californication, where the lead character gets the operation.

I know its fiction and overdramatized and all, but still... youch. Also, I lol'd. Nervously.
 
2010-03-17 09:57:16 PM  
The educational video never tells you that getting a needle in your vas deferens feels like a kick in the balls.
 
2010-03-17 10:01:19 PM  
Hope you like prostate trouble.
 
2010-03-17 10:06:12 PM  
vasectomies FTW

/no babies
//yeah, bareback
 
2010-03-17 10:06:28 PM  

Hickory-smoked: The educational video never tells you that getting a needle in your vas deferens feels like a kick in the balls.


Info said it would feel like a "bad bee sting." Put two and two together as to where the "bad be sting" is going to be located, and its not difficult to figure out that it is going to hurt like an sob.

Still, one kick in the balls beats the hell out of the thought of having to go through another 9-10 months of pregnancy, 2-4 years of diapers, getting thrown up on, 12 years of school, college, etc, etc...

2 is enough. Love my kids, but that's farking it.
 
2010-03-17 10:09:06 PM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: Hickory-smoked: The educational video never tells you that getting a needle in your vas deferens feels like a kick in the balls.

Info said it would feel like a "bad bee sting." Put two and two together as to where the "bad be sting" is going to be located, and its not difficult to figure out that it is going to hurt like an sob.

Still, one kick in the balls beats the hell out of the thought of having to go through another 9-10 months of pregnancy, 2-4 years of diapers, getting thrown up on, 12 years of school, college, etc, etc...

2 is enough. Love my kids, but that's farking it.


actually, the needles didn't hurt so much as the second pain injection -- the rush of fluid hurt like f*ck (but only briefly)

so yes, get it done. the worst part is laying half-naked on a table in front of strangers.
 
2010-03-17 10:13:29 PM  

Big Dave: I got mine two days before I had to play football for my junior collage.
It was not a fun game.


How'd that work out for you?
 
2010-03-17 10:15:33 PM  
EighthundredmillionthFarker:
Scheduled mine for early May, then watched the first episode of the second season of Californication, where the lead character gets the operation.

I know its fiction and overdramatized and all, but still... youch. Also, I lol'd. Nervously.


I watched the actual thing on the old show "The Operation". It was amazing, they made a tiny little slit, went in, snip snip, and out again. Maybe a few stitches, tops. If I'd been waiting to have one I'd have felt great about it.

Ironically... I think I may have the opposite problem :P Wish they could snip snip for that.
 
2010-03-17 10:19:07 PM  

pxlboy: actually, the needles didn't hurt so much as the second pain injection -- the rush of fluid hurt like f*ck (but only briefly)

so yes, get it done. the worst part is laying half-naked on a table in front of strangers.


That actually is reassuring, so thanks (no sarcasm for a change.)

I'll gladly let a roomfull of doctors see my junk if it means I can be firing blanks within a couple of months. Hell, the doc at the first appointment had to do "the prostate test", and my thinking was still, if a finger up my arse means no more rugrats, then please, invite some friends, do what you gotta do. I've been through much, much worse.
 
2010-03-17 10:31:23 PM  

pxlboy: so yes, get it done. the worst part is laying half-naked on a table in front of strangers.


Pfft. I do that for fun. The real worst part is staring at a ceiling tile for an hour listening to the doctors say stuff like "What the hell is this? I've never seen it tangled up like that before..."

/They were talking about the spool of suture thread
 
2010-03-17 10:36:15 PM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: pxlboy: actually, the needles didn't hurt so much as the second pain injection -- the rush of fluid hurt like f*ck (but only briefly)

so yes, get it done. the worst part is laying half-naked on a table in front of strangers.

That actually is reassuring, so thanks (no sarcasm for a change.)

I'll gladly let a roomfull of doctors see my junk if it means I can be firing blanks within a couple of months. Hell, the doc at the first appointment had to do "the prostate test", and my thinking was still, if a finger up my arse means no more rugrats, then please, invite some friends, do what you gotta do. I've been through much, much worse.


yeah, it's really not that bad. and no prostate test, either.

kaiser permanente only required me to go to some little "class" that consisted of an old video from the 70s or 80s and some Q&A with a doctor.

i was "functional" within 3 days, and farking within a week.
 
2010-03-17 10:37:46 PM  
Hurr, Durr, Beer!
 
2010-03-17 10:41:26 PM  

pxlboy: EighthundredmillionthFarker: pxlboy: actually, the needles didn't hurt so much as the second pain injection -- the rush of fluid hurt like f*ck (but only briefly)

so yes, get it done. the worst part is laying half-naked on a table in front of strangers.

That actually is reassuring, so thanks (no sarcasm for a change.)

I'll gladly let a roomfull of doctors see my junk if it means I can be firing blanks within a couple of months. Hell, the doc at the first appointment had to do "the prostate test", and my thinking was still, if a finger up my arse means no more rugrats, then please, invite some friends, do what you gotta do. I've been through much, much worse.

yeah, it's really not that bad. and no prostate test, either.

kaiser permanente only required me to go to some little "class" that consisted of an old video from the 70s or 80s and some Q&A with a doctor.

i was "functional" within 3 days, and farking within a week.


Mine didn't even require that.

"You're 27. You and your wife are both sure you don't want kids?"
"Yes."
"Really sure? You can't reverse this with any reliability."
"Yes."
"Okay, sign here."

Got a hematoma the size of a golf ball on one side, finally went away with chelation therapy. Ruled clear after a month, not had a problem since.

As for prostate trouble as someone mentioned, have a cite for that? The anatomy says you're wrong- everything the prostate makes still is ejaculated, there are no data suggesting prostate trouble.
 
2010-03-17 10:54:38 PM  
Jogged home after mine. went to work the next day in the lumber yard.
 
2010-03-17 11:02:18 PM  

Sword and Shield: pxlboy: EighthundredmillionthFarker: pxlboy: actually, the needles didn't hurt so much as the second pain injection -- the rush of fluid hurt like f*ck (but only briefly)

so yes, get it done. the worst part is laying half-naked on a table in front of strangers.

That actually is reassuring, so thanks (no sarcasm for a change.)

I'll gladly let a roomfull of doctors see my junk if it means I can be firing blanks within a couple of months. Hell, the doc at the first appointment had to do "the prostate test", and my thinking was still, if a finger up my arse means no more rugrats, then please, invite some friends, do what you gotta do. I've been through much, much worse.

yeah, it's really not that bad. and no prostate test, either.

kaiser permanente only required me to go to some little "class" that consisted of an old video from the 70s or 80s and some Q&A with a doctor.

i was "functional" within 3 days, and farking within a week.

Mine didn't even require that.

"You're 27. You and your wife are both sure you don't want kids?"
"Yes."
"Really sure? You can't reverse this with any reliability."
"Yes."
"Okay, sign here."

Got a hematoma the size of a golf ball on one side, finally went away with chelation therapy. Ruled clear after a month, not had a problem since.

As for prostate trouble as someone mentioned, have a cite for that? The anatomy says you're wrong- everything the prostate makes still is ejaculated, there are no data suggesting prostate trouble.


sorry about your trouble, man. but yeah, i'm glad i didn't have to take a finger in my ass to check my prostate.

i get to deal with that in 7 years when i reach my 40s.

whee.
 
2010-03-17 11:13:41 PM  

imroot: I'm getting mine done tomorrow


Mine is next Friday. I've already talked myself out of it a thousand times. I jokingly asked the Dr if he'd give me a general. He said it goes much faster if he has his whole staff in the room with us. It's then I realized I don't feel like laughing about it.
 
2010-03-17 11:18:01 PM  
Thanks, Farkers, I'm looking forward to getting fixed. Not only is it no more kids, but a weekend of pure, unadulterated sympathy from the old lady.

I didn't see anything about "no beer allowed" for the next couple days. Time to stock up.
 
2010-03-17 11:30:59 PM  
Getting mine done Friday. I don't care about basketball, the timing just worked out this way.
 
2010-03-17 11:38:01 PM  
My daughter was born on March 18 last year. Spending 3 days in the hospital letting my wife recover from her C-section, holding my new baby girl, and watching the tourney was a pretty awesome way to spend a weekend.
 
2010-03-18 12:07:35 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: I didn't see anything about "no beer allowed" for the next couple days. Time to stock up.


Drinking can thin the blood. Talk to your doctor before drinking too much. You know, be careful. You don't want to bleed down there more than needed.
 
Displayed 50 of 59 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter








In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report