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(The New York Times) Fail Thanks to the crystal-clear sound of its PA system, the Port Authority will always have the citizens of Brooklyn prepared in the event of a zzb frzzkd sxpldts   (cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com) divider line 45
More: Fail, Port Authority, E-mail Required, Port Authority of New York, sirens, water supply, photography  
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7563 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Mar 2010 at 8:42 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2010-03-16 07:08:08 AM
Fbxrd.

/NYC personifies fbxrd
 
2010-03-16 07:12:50 AM
Obligatory (new window, slightly NSFW audio)
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2010-03-16 07:16:35 AM
A woman named Diane, who walked two dogs on Columbia Street, wondered if they came from unseen airplanes. "Sometimes, the dogs just look up to the sky," she said.

Dogs look up as if to say, "God, please rescue me from idiot humans."

Several years ago the Boston subway system upgraded the sound system from unintelligble potentially useful announcements to vaguely intelligible useless announcements. Instead of not understanding when the next train is coming, you understand that one of your fellow passengers is a terrorist.
 
2010-03-16 07:22:02 AM
That's not funny, my brother died from zzb frzzkd sxpldts.
 
2010-03-16 08:19:02 AM
"Did they say 'Grand Central Station,' or 'my aunt's constipation?'"
 
2010-03-16 08:44:13 AM
Man, I remember my sxpldts from back when I was young and single. Wild times.
 
2010-03-16 08:46:09 AM
It's to reeducate the citizens of the borough on the proper use of Brooklynese.
 
2010-03-16 08:47:33 AM
Ahh sounds like SEPTA.

Bffzl Street. Access to R-szl, and fdergfl Bus.
 
2010-03-16 08:48:39 AM
A woman named Diane, who walked two dogs on Columbia Street, wondered if they came from unseen airplanes. "Sometimes, the dogs just look up to the sky," she said.


Shenanigans. Dogs can't look up.
 
2010-03-16 08:52:47 AM
FTFA: "A block away on Tiffany Place, Rafael Rosado, who works at a building on the street, recognized the warnings - "garble, garble, garble" - as a noise he had heard several times over the years."


I found a photo of Rafael Rosado:

img188.imageshack.us
 
2010-03-16 08:52:48 AM
www.guy-sports.com

They's whores in the hallway!
 
2010-03-16 08:56:45 AM
ZAZ

Several years ago the Boston subway system upgraded the sound system from unintelligble potentially useful announcements to vaguely intelligible useless announcements. Instead of not understanding when the next train is coming, you understand that one of your fellow passengers is a terrorist.

DC Metro did the same thing 2 or 3 years ago. PSAs about not running and jumping on the escalators come through crystal clear. Now only if they could only upgrade the rail service to non-fatal.
 
2010-03-16 08:58:21 AM
Yes, Diane, they are coming from airplanes.
 
2010-03-16 09:02:56 AM
The only thing that comes out clear on the subway speakers in the city is 'Please listen carefully'. Everything after that is gibberish.
 
2010-03-16 09:02:58 AM
Barfmaker: That's not funny, my brother died from zzb frzzkd sxpldts.

That's not funny Ruth, I was a zzb frzzkd sxpldts!

/Jesus, that head...
//Obscure?
 
2010-03-16 09:06:36 AM
www.trailerparkboys411.com

Attention Mahfarkers, this is a UrrhRiizzUrsRizzzurh
 
2010-03-16 09:15:47 AM
Phil's on it. (new window)

/so bummed that Better of Ted is getting canned.
 
2010-03-16 09:27:16 AM
ZAZ: A woman named Diane, who walked two dogs on Columbia Street, wondered if they came from unseen airplanes. "Sometimes, the dogs just look up to the sky," she said.

Dogs look up as if to say, "God, please rescue me from idiot humans."

Several years ago the Boston subway system upgraded the sound system from unintelligble potentially useful announcements to vaguely intelligible useless announcements. Instead of not understanding when the next train is coming, you understand that one of your fellow passengers is a terrorist.


Don't be silly. Dogs can't look up. Shaun of the Dead told me so. Big Al wouldn't lie would he?
 
2010-03-16 09:32:17 AM
Imagine if you will an announcer you can barely understand. He refers to a zzb frzzkd sxpldts but you're not quite sure what he said. He seems to be eating something, or perhaps he's a little drunk. It's remotely possible that he just said something about

images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2010-03-16 09:34:19 AM
MugzyBrown: Ahh sounds like SEPTA.

Bffzl Street. Access to R-szl, and fdergfl Bus.


Septa's problem is that they refuse to acknowledge that different stations have different acoustics. 2nd Street is overly loud, but intelligible. 34th Street is like a robot screaming into a didgeridoo.
 
2010-03-16 09:39:34 AM
This text is now purple: MugzyBrown: Ahh sounds like SEPTA.

Bffzl Street. Access to R-szl, and fdergfl Bus.

Septa's problem is that they refuse to acknowledge that different stations have different acoustics. 2nd Street is overly loud, but intelligible. 34th Street is like a robot screaming into a didgeridoo.


Screaming Robot Didgeridoo would be a cool band name.
 
2010-03-16 09:42:10 AM
runawaywoodchipper: Imagine if you will an announcer you can barely understand. He refers to a zzb frzzkd sxpldts but you're not quite sure what he said. He seems to be eating something, or perhaps he's a little drunk. It's remotely possible that he just said something about

Awesome. Made my morning, thank you sir.
 
2010-03-16 09:45:13 AM
scrawlfx.com

Approves.

/Hot like a [bzzzzzzt]
 
2010-03-16 09:45:19 AM
Fnord.
 
2010-03-16 09:49:05 AM
i236.photobucket.com
 
2010-03-16 10:05:32 AM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2010-03-16 10:29:09 AM
There's no place like Plrtz Glrb.
 
2010-03-16 10:45:18 AM
this thread has zzb'd my frzzkd sxpldts, thanks fark

/to the announcers Link (pops)
//your general reaction to these incoherent announcementsLink (pops)
 
2010-03-16 10:47:45 AM
 
2010-03-16 10:47:46 AM
sorry, that first link was supposed to be this:Link (new window)

/good article tho..
 
2010-03-16 10:54:32 AM
idrow: The only thing that comes out clear on the subway speakers in the city is 'Please listen carefully'. Everything after that is gibberish.

Sounds like the same speakers we had in the eighties. Tamper-proof but useless.
 
2010-03-16 11:28:55 AM
a "nmkl pjkl ftmch" from the local authority?

www.bebosh.com
 
2010-03-16 11:30:00 AM
In case of an actual emergency you would be instructed to .azsqweaascdf.r5.7gg.j899==.....

Don't panic-- juat follow the verbal instructions. Failure to obey is a serious offense.



I remember a few years back SEPTA (Phila transit anomily) sent out propoasals to local radio stations about allowing the broadcaster to install public address speakers at regional rail stations. SEPTA would permit exclusive PA rights to that station (and the ability for the transit agrncy to interrupt with train anouncements)-- and one of the questons was how much revenue would the radio station guarantee SEPTA for that privilege. For some reason, that system not got installed.
 
2010-03-16 11:32:59 AM
i27.tinypic.com

OOGA OOGGA
 
2010-03-16 11:49:01 AM
I said a cheeseburger, onion rings, and A LARGE ORANGE DRINK!
 
2010-03-16 12:05:07 PM
Attention, Attention: The next stop is wtthhhh al waxxxx

San Diego's trolley's have that. Your only guess of knowing where you are on the trail is by seeing the signs at the station.
 
2010-03-16 12:12:20 PM
sonofASDF: a "nmkl pjkl ftmch" from the local authority?

Came here for the Young Ones, leaving quite satisfied. Well done.

/"What's a Ftmmmtch?"
 
2010-03-16 12:21:59 PM
MORB: Approves.

/Hot like a [bzzzzzzt]



img.photobucket.com

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAX
 
2010-03-16 12:24:46 PM
sonofASDF: a "nmkl pjkl ftmch" from the local authority?

Nice, glad to see some still remember that
 
2010-03-16 12:29:35 PM
I am upset with you all at the lack of Bill Cosby references. That is all.
 
2010-03-16 01:22:27 PM
www.science.oregonstate.edu
 
2010-03-16 02:00:10 PM
ihasahotdog.files.wordpress.com
 
2010-03-16 05:09:42 PM
One of my buddies actually can translate that NYC subway PA speak. It is more impressive than understanding African languages that use clicks in words.

/you would need a lot of small speakers and people that can speak english correctly to make a PA work
 
2010-03-16 05:42:12 PM
I actually zzb frzzkd sxpldts several years ago when fzffkk rpfkk wrkjjjh, so I'm getting a real kick out of these replies.
 
2010-03-17 06:33:33 PM
RainbeauxSue: I actually zzb frzzkd sxpldts several years ago when fzffkk rpfkk wrkjjjh wrjkjjh, so I'm getting a real kick out of these replies.

/pet peeve
 
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