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(USA Today)   Addressing the most pressing problem facing the nation, pediatricians and your mom call for choke-proof hot dog   (usatoday.com) divider line 110
    More: Interesting, American Academy of Pediatrics, your mom, pediatricians, hot dogs, choking, junk foods, warning labels, nutritionists  
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4616 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2010 at 5:42 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-02-22 12:56:40 AM
FTA...But Riley questions whether warning labels are needed. She notes that more than half of hot dogs sold in stores already have choking-prevention tips on their packages, advising parents to cut them into small pieces. "As a mother who has fed toddlers cylindrical foods like grapes, bananas, hot dogs and carrots, I 'redesigned' them in my kitchen by cutting them with a paring knife until my children were old enough to manage on their own," Riley says.


I did the same thing when my son was young. I knew certain foods were choking hazards for young children, so I cut those food up into small pieces. And this is well before any type of choking-prevention warnings on packages. It's called common sense.
 
2010-02-22 01:00:27 AM
When will pretzels come with choking warnings?
 
2010-02-22 01:18:46 AM
"It's called common sense."

Not as common as one would like.
 
2010-02-22 02:12:33 AM
Are parents really giving their kids whole hot dogs? Id bet the kids crib doubles as a medicine cabinet too.
 
2010-02-22 04:00:07 AM
Obviously, the only solution is Intravenous Hotdogs™ or IVdogs™. Yum yum.
 
2010-02-22 04:04:29 AM
Bathia_Mapes: I did the same thing when my son was young. I knew certain foods were choking hazards for young children, so I cut those food up into small pieces. And this is well before any type of choking-prevention warnings on packages. It's called common sense.

Unfortunetly that is what seems to be missing most today. IMO due to everyone expecting warning labels telling them what is hazardous and how.

Make it idiot proof and nature makes a better idiot.
 
2010-02-22 04:25:59 AM
More than 10,000 children under 14 go to the emergency room each year after choking on food, and up to 77 die.

omg 77!
 
2010-02-22 04:27:21 AM
Britney Spear's Speculum: More than 10,000 children under 14 go to the emergency room each year after choking on food, and up to 77 die.

omg 77!


Newsflash!!!! Food is a choking hazard.
 
2010-02-22 05:14:34 AM
i211.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-22 05:31:16 AM
www.twisteez.com


Theres nothing you can't fix or remove with a bent coat metal hanger
 
2010-02-22 05:43:51 AM
How about not feeding your kids hot dogs? We've got an obesity epidemic. Give them some vegetables or fruits.
 
2010-02-22 05:44:44 AM
Phlem Pickens: Theres nothing you can't fix or remove with a bent coat metal hanger

No, no - this is to prevent problems with childen after they're born. Wrong thread.
 
2010-02-22 05:46:32 AM
If you were to take the best engineers in the world and try to design the perfect plug for a child's airway, it would be a hot dog," says statement author Gary Smith

Oh come on, Gary. I'm sure with appropriate Government funding, we can do better. How about if it had little spiny bits at one end?
 
2010-02-22 05:50:48 AM
If you can't eat 'em....just suck on them...
 
2010-02-22 05:53:24 AM
NovaeDeArx: Phlem Pickens: Theres nothing you can't fix or remove with a bent coat metal hanger

No, no - this is to prevent problems with childen after they're born. Wrong thread.


you can fix a bad attitude after they're born which makes a coat hanger versatile. Not sure about the before after the after - against my religion
 
2010-02-22 05:54:14 AM
WzDD: If you were to take the best engineers in the world and try to design the perfect plug for a child's airway, it would be a hot dog," says statement author Gary Smith

Oh come on, Gary. I'm sure with appropriate Government funding, we can do better. How about if it had little spiny bits at one end?


What, like the candiru of hot dogs?

Mother Nature: scary and dangerously insane, but a hell of an engineer...
 
2010-02-22 05:55:18 AM
But what will radio hosts use now?
 
2010-02-22 05:58:02 AM
nerdiest-kids.com

Did someone say choking children?
 
2010-02-22 05:58:48 AM
Phlem Pickens: NovaeDeArx: Phlem Pickens: Theres nothing you can't fix or remove with a bent coat metal hanger

No, no - this is to prevent problems with childen after they're born. Wrong thread.

you can fix a bad attitude after they're born which makes a coat hanger versatile. Not sure about the before after the after - against my religion


Something Positive can elucidate that one for you, my good sir:
www.somethingpositive.net
 
2010-02-22 06:10:43 AM
dear dirty hot linker (^pedobear),

thanks for my one-way ticket on Handbasket Airways.

regards,
dominick
 
2010-02-22 06:25:34 AM
Still no cure for pretzels.
 
2010-02-22 06:26:59 AM
You're doing eating it wrong
 
2010-02-22 06:28:10 AM
farm4.static.flickr.com

I swallowed turpentine when I was a small kid. Mom didn't even blink; put me over her knee and jammed her finger down my throat. She had six kids, no big deal.
 
2010-02-22 06:28:11 AM
Must every food be designed to be safe for small children? Must every movie and TV show be G rated because a child may see it? And don't even farking get me started on the internet. As a father of an 8 month old, I can say that it's MY job to protect my child. Bananas, grapes, hot dogs, etc. are cut up. It's just common sense. A lot of the shows that my wife and I like have to be DVR'd so that we can watch them when the peanut is in bed. And maybe we're radical and all, but our daughter will never have a TV or computer with unrestricted internet access in her room. Parenting is not easy, and a lot of sacrifices have to be made, but we chose this responsibility. I don't expect, or even want, everything in the world to be made safe for my child. It is the responsibility of every parent to teach their children what is safe, and what isn't; what is appropriate, and what isn't. It is also the PARENTS responsibility to be a farking parent and police their own children. Not expect someone else to do it.

/take your village and shove it up your ass
//rant off
 
2010-02-22 06:30:03 AM
Don't screw around with hot dogs - if you can't eat them, don't eat them ...

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2010-02-22 06:32:06 AM
(to the tune of "Teach Your Children by CSNY")
Teach your children to chew
If you don't
They will cause you
To be dumb-ass douches

/got nuthin
 
2010-02-22 06:34:25 AM
I have designed a new, safer hot dog, which I offer for free to the world.

img535.imageshack.us

On the left, the enlarged end allows for an easier grip. This will also permit, in the event of choking, for the hot dog to be more easily removed.

Please note the three grip fibres on the left. Made from reinforced casing, these will help to keep a solid hold despite a general slippiness of the hot dog overall.

In order to encourage holding the portion on the left, note the split, sectioned end on the right. This creates a natural starting point for the new safety dog to be enjoyed.
 
2010-02-22 06:37:08 AM
Gordon Bennett: I have designed a new, safer hot dog, which I offer for free to the world.



On the left, the enlarged end allows for an easier grip. This will also permit, in the event of choking, for the hot dog to be more easily removed.

Please note the three grip fibres on the left. Made from reinforced casing, these will help to keep a solid hold despite a general slippiness of the hot dog overall.

In order to encourage holding the portion on the left, note the split, sectioned end on the right. This creates a natural starting point for the new safety dog to be enjoyed.


*Like*
 
2010-02-22 06:46:15 AM
Gordon Bennett: I have designed a new, safer hot dog, which I offer for free to the world.



On the left, the enlarged end allows for an easier grip. This will also permit, in the event of choking, for the hot dog to be more easily removed.

Please note the three grip fibres on the left. Made from reinforced casing, these will help to keep a solid hold despite a general slippiness of the hot dog overall.

In order to encourage holding the portion on the left, note the split, sectioned end on the right. This creates a natural starting point for the new safety dog to be enjoyed.


Your CAD skills are spot on.
Off to the patent office with that ASAP!!!
 
2010-02-22 06:46:29 AM
Greatest Quote EVAR!!
"No parents can watch all of their kids 100% of the time," Smith says. "The best way to protect kids is to design these risks out of existence."

Next up on Geraldo...
Bubble-Wrap for children, good idea.. You Decide :D

/This Numbnut HAS to be from Maryland (nanny-state from Hell)
 
2010-02-22 06:47:47 AM
Gordon Bennett: *d^ck pic*

Dude
 
2010-02-22 06:52:30 AM
Yeah, but do you know what girls learn to do while chocking on a hotdog...?

We must stop this measure before it's too late.
 
2010-02-22 06:52:53 AM
Gordon Bennett: I have designed a new, safer hot dog, which I offer for free to the world.



On the left, the enlarged end allows for an easier grip. This will also permit, in the event of choking, for the hot dog to be more easily removed.

Please note the three grip fibres on the left. Made from reinforced casing, these will help to keep a solid hold despite a general slippiness of the hot dog overall.

In order to encourage holding the portion on the left, note the split, sectioned end on the right. This creates a natural starting point for the new safety dog to be enjoyed.


Looks more like a NCAA basketball referee's whistle.
 
2010-02-22 06:54:48 AM
Bathia_Mapes: by cutting them with a paring knife until my children were old enough to manage on their own

What kind of lass ass mother gives their children paring knives?

/what a biatch
 
2010-02-22 06:55:23 AM
Phlem Pickens: bent coat metal hanger

AKA "Universal Tool".
 
2010-02-22 06:58:31 AM
NOVanHelsing: Bathia_Mapes: by cutting them with a paring knife until my children were old enough to manage on their own

What kind of lass ass mother gives their children paring knives?

/what a biatch


What kind of mother cuts her children until they can learn to do it themselves?

THIS IS WHY WE HAVE GOTHS YOU STUPID COW
 
2010-02-22 06:59:36 AM
Sounds like a good idea to me! We should work on fixing carrots too.
 
2010-02-22 07:00:07 AM
shivashakti: How about not feeding your kids hot dogs? We've got an obesity epidemic. Give them some vegetables or fruits.

But what about the choking hazard of the evil broccoli? (insert pic of Dr. Hibbert and ghost Homer here - I can't access my image shack thingy).

When I was 5, I did start to choke on a hot dog at a pig roast the family was attending. I started to turn blue, and remember my Mom do an eye roll (oh, not this shait again), said very calmly to my older brother "help your brother". He picked me up by the feet and shook me. Problem solved. We had six boys in the family at that time, and to my parents, things like that were daily occurrences. If the parents didn't show up at the ER at least once a month with a kid bleeding from an ax wound or a knock on the head with a baseball bat, it was a calm month.
 
2010-02-22 07:03:21 AM
dna_level_c: Phlem Pickens: bent coat metal hanger

AKA "Universal Tool".


The original Leatherman.
 
2010-02-22 07:06:56 AM
pmdbuilders.net
 
2010-02-22 07:13:08 AM
Ha! Shows how much you know subby. My mom doesn't even have a gag reflex!
 
2010-02-22 07:14:20 AM
I actually have to say that I'm torn on the whole Hot Dog issue.
I wouldn't think it's a big deal but my Father died while watching a Phillies game and eating a hot dog.
No I'm serious, He was at home and watching the game on TV when they made a home run and dad was eating a hot dog for dinner. My sister was the only one home at the time and at 10 years old (and before the Heimlich was invented) there was nothing she could do to help him. Now I can't see 'reforming' the hot dog but people do choke and die from them.
 
2010-02-22 07:20:24 AM
Grimmbear:
I wouldn't think it's a big deal but my Father died while watching a Phillies game and eating a hot dog.
No I'm serious, He was at home and watching the game on TV when they made a home run and dad was eating a hot dog for dinner. My sister was the only one home at the time and at 10 years old (and before the Heimlich was invented) there was nothing she could do to help him..


I think the answer here is obvious:

Kill the Phillies with fire, sow the ground with salt. It's really the only way to be sure.

Also:
images7.cafepress.com
 
2010-02-22 07:26:21 AM
that's what she said
 
2010-02-22 07:28:57 AM
Coming soon: the gag-proof corndog:

i45.tinypic.com
 
2010-02-22 07:31:55 AM
BigBooper: Must every food be designed to be safe for small children? Must every movie and TV show be G rated because a child may see it? And don't even farking get me started on the internet. As a father of an 8 month old, I can say that it's MY job to protect my child. Bananas, grapes, hot dogs, etc. are cut up. It's just common sense. A lot of the shows that my wife and I like have to be DVR'd so that we can watch them when the peanut is in bed. And maybe we're radical and all, but our daughter will never have a TV or computer with unrestricted internet access in her room. Parenting is not easy, and a lot of sacrifices have to be made, but we chose this responsibility. I don't expect, or even want, everything in the world to be made safe for my child. It is the responsibility of every parent to teach their children what is safe, and what isn't; what is appropriate, and what isn't. It is also the PARENTS responsibility to be a farking parent and police their own children. Not expect someone else to do it.

/take your village and shove it up your ass
//rant off


Newsletter, etc.

Seriously, I agree with you 100%. The problem is with the parents who don't feel like parenting. They're the ones that yell and scream every time something might concievably hurt the snowflake.
 
2010-02-22 07:36:53 AM
Well, we obviously need to put choking warnings on coins, marbles small rocks, and anything else a 2-year old might put in their mouth. DO IT FOR THE CHILDREN!
 
2010-02-22 07:38:48 AM
Did we learn nothing from Field of Dreams?
 
2010-02-22 07:39:44 AM
I got it. We'll call it a "hamburger"
 
2010-02-22 07:46:52 AM
baltimoreblonde: BigBooper: Must every food be designed to be safe for small children? Must every movie and TV show be G rated because a child may see it? And don't even farking get me started on the internet. As a father of an 8 month old, I can say that it's MY job to protect my child. Bananas, grapes, hot dogs, etc. are cut up. It's just common sense. A lot of the shows that my wife and I like have to be DVR'd so that we can watch them when the peanut is in bed. And maybe we're radical and all, but our daughter will never have a TV or computer with unrestricted internet access in her room. Parenting is not easy, and a lot of sacrifices have to be made, but we chose this responsibility. I don't expect, or even want, everything in the world to be made safe for my child. It is the responsibility of every parent to teach their children what is safe, and what isn't; what is appropriate, and what isn't. It is also the PARENTS responsibility to be a farking parent and police their own children. Not expect someone else to do it.

/take your village and shove it up your ass
//rant off

Newsletter, etc.

Seriously, I agree with you 100%. The problem is with the parents who don't feel like parenting. They're the ones that yell and scream every time something might concievably hurt the snowflake.


EH. As a parent myself, I'm kinda torn on this. Keep in mind, first of all, that my parents had 3 boys and pretty much let us run ourselves as long as we kept the property damage to a minimum, and we all turned out fine (-ish...).

That being said, I think there should be more space in our culture where it's OKAY to lean over to another parent in a restaurant when their kid is screaming and give them some advice. Really, some people are just farking clueless... Especially that bribing a kid to stop a bad behavior just REWARDS that bad behavior... UGH. That just drives the ol' urge to kill through the roof, I'll tell you.

And y'know, I have to think that the USA might be a lil' better place if it was more acceptable to just say that stuff. I'd be willing to listen to what other parents had to say if that meant I could pitch my 2c in...

Because really, those of us that bust our butts to be good parents really do want to have our kids grow up with mature, responsible contemporaries... Not a bunch of whiny, spoiled crybabies! I mean, you think Gen Y is turning out useless, just wait until their farking children are hitting the workforce. I'll never be out of a job, what with actually having some form of work ethic and all... And damned if my daughters won't have one, too, as well as some kind of respect for themselves and others. I don't care if it takes a village or not, I'm just tired of kids growing up with a sense of entitlement bigger than the Goodyear Farking Blimp.

/Off my lawn, etc.
 
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