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(The Consumerist)   Somewhere, a lonely woman longing for Robert Pattinson developed, produced, and sold a body pillow of him in all his sparkly Twilightness. And now, they've made other characters and are selling them too   (consumerist.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, pillows, logical conclusions, your mom, vampires  
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22905 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2010 at 3:36 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



205 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2010-02-18 12:05:00 PM  
I'm no seamstress, but what's with the E.T. neck?
 
2010-02-18 12:09:20 PM  

neofooman: I'm no seamstress, but what's with the E.T. neck?


My guess is fanged roleplay.
 
2010-02-18 12:16:51 PM  
Let me know if they make an anatomically correct Kristen Stewart RealDoll complete with lifeless eyes.
 
2010-02-18 12:21:03 PM  

Superevil: Let me know if they make an anatomically correct Kristen Stewart RealDoll complete with lifeless, unblinking eyes.


After I saw the Rifftrax of Twilight, I'm convinced she cannot physically blink.
 
2010-02-18 12:22:29 PM  
This might be "too controversial for America."
 
2010-02-18 12:28:20 PM  

The English Major: Superevil: Let me know if they make an anatomically correct Kristen Stewart RealDoll complete with lifeless, unblinking eyes.

After I saw the Rifftrax of Twilight, I'm convinced she cannot physically blink.


Is it any good? I have no desire to watch it but if the Rifftrax is any good I might suck it up and do it.
 
2010-02-18 12:28:56 PM  
That. Is creepy as f*ck.
 
2010-02-18 12:31:22 PM  
www.yourprops.com

/Does not approve.
 
2010-02-18 12:32:46 PM  

Superevil: Is it any good? I have no desire to watch it but if the Rifftrax is any good I might suck it up and do it.


The Rifftrax is actually really funny. I would never watch the original movie, but in all seriousness, it reminded me of some of the best MST3Ks Kevin, Bill, and Mike had; the Riffs were consistent, spot-on, and hilarious. I'd put it up there with Werewolf, Space Mutiny, Soultaker, and Time Chasers (my personal favorites).

/after you see it, you will laugh every time someone says "BLINK"
 
2010-02-18 12:37:27 PM  

The English Major: Superevil: Is it any good? I have no desire to watch it but if the Rifftrax is any good I might suck it up and do it.

The Rifftrax is actually really funny. I would never watch the original movie, but in all seriousness, it reminded me of some of the best MST3Ks Kevin, Bill, and Mike had; the Riffs were consistent, spot-on, and hilarious. I'd put it up there with Werewolf, Space Mutiny, Soultaker, and Time Chasers (my personal favorites).

/after you see it, you will laugh every time someone says "BLINK"


I'll check it out. Hopefully I won't hate myself for having sat through Twilight.
 
2010-02-18 12:42:12 PM  

The English Major: Superevil: Is it any good? I have no desire to watch it but if the Rifftrax is any good I might suck it up and do it.

The Rifftrax is actually really funny. I would never watch the original movie, but in all seriousness, it reminded me of some of the best MST3Ks Kevin, Bill, and Mike had; the Riffs were consistent, spot-on, and hilarious. I'd put it up there with Werewolf, Space Mutiny, Soultaker, and Time Chasers (my personal favorites).

/after you see it, you will laugh every time someone says "BLINK"


line?
 
2010-02-18 12:43:21 PM  

Superevil: I'll check it out. Hopefully I won't hate myself for having sat through Twilight.


I drank while watching it.
Trust me, it's hard to focus on the movie itself; the acting and dialogue are just...just terrible. If it weren't for the books and raving fangirls/boys/mothers, this would have been another bargain-bin b-movie.
 
2010-02-18 01:00:03 PM  

Superevil: Let me know if they make an anatomically correct Kristen Stewart Ashley Greene RealDoll complete with lifeless eyes great rack.


ftfm
 
2010-02-18 01:06:19 PM  

stickmangrit: line?


Crap! You're right.

Like I said, I was drinking.

/LINE
 
2010-02-18 01:10:18 PM  
I'm guessing the next batch will have a place to attach the sparkly dildo.
 
2010-02-18 01:28:46 PM  
I certainly hope no one with a vagina is going to buy one. That could be awkward.
 
2010-02-18 03:37:55 PM  
Jesus. If my wife sees these, I'll be divorced.
 
HBK
2010-02-18 03:38:12 PM  
does it vibrate?
 
2010-02-18 03:38:41 PM  
cdn.fd.uproxx.com

This still holds the top spot for the most disturbing arts and crafts project inspired by Twilight.
 
2010-02-18 03:39:23 PM  

Superevil: The English Major: Superevil: Let me know if they make an anatomically correct Kristen Stewart RealDoll complete with lifeless, unblinking eyes.

After I saw the Rifftrax of Twilight, I'm convinced she cannot physically blink.

Is it any good? I have no desire to watch it but if the Rifftrax is any good I might suck it up and do it.


Oh god, absolutely. Watched it with friends with Rifftrax. It's amazing.

/lllllllllllllllllllladies?
 
2010-02-18 03:39:36 PM  

penthesilea: I'm guessing the next batch will have a place to attach the sparkly dildo.



This is why I like Fark.
 
2010-02-18 03:42:39 PM  

penthesilea: I'm guessing the next batch will have a place to attach the sparkly dildo.


Is that the one I heard about that you refrigerate and it keeps cold so as to 'properly' represent undead vampire penis?
 
2010-02-18 03:42:44 PM  
i184.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-18 03:43:59 PM  
What... the... fark? If I was that greasy emo kid, I'd live in constant fear of these women.
 
2010-02-18 03:44:45 PM  

Coconut Tequila: What... the... fark? If I was that greasy emo kid, I'd live in constant fear of these women.


Let's call them "Twights."
 
2010-02-18 03:45:24 PM  
So I sort of know what Rifftrax movies are, but last I saw you had to buy the movie from their website? Torrenting possible? Anyone? EIP.


/Bueller?
 
2010-02-18 03:45:26 PM  
They're acting as if this is something new & unique... It's been proven in the court of public opinion that: "If it's weird, Japan's done it already..."
 
2010-02-18 03:46:03 PM  
Sigh. And not in a good way.
 
2010-02-18 03:46:08 PM  

The English Major: Coconut Tequila: What... the... fark? If I was that greasy emo kid, I'd live in constant fear of these women.

Let's call them "Twights."


Interesting, what the entomology on the term?
 
2010-02-18 03:46:25 PM  

MightyPez: Approves:


Kumiko Tan is NOT amused.
 
2010-02-18 03:47:14 PM  
For the stalker who's just to busy to contruct the doll out of Pattinson's skin.
 
2010-02-18 03:47:55 PM  

MightyPez: Approves:


came for this. Leaving satisfied.


/30 rock is the shiz-nit-o-bam-snip-snap-sack.
 
2010-02-18 03:48:58 PM  

Coconut Tequila: The English Major: Coconut Tequila: What... the... fark? If I was that greasy emo kid, I'd live in constant fear of these women.

Let's call them "Twights."

Interesting, what the entomology on the term?


Let's say it's "twit."
 
2010-02-18 03:50:10 PM  
Like Edward Cullen, Manilow never seems to age.

www.contactmusic.com

That's because Founders never age.

/The Great Hotlink
 
2010-02-18 03:50:58 PM  

Quasar: Superevil: The English Major: Superevil: Let me know if they make an anatomically correct Kristen Stewart RealDoll complete with lifeless, unblinking eyes.

After I saw the Rifftrax of Twilight, I'm convinced she cannot physically blink.

Is it any good? I have no desire to watch it but if the Rifftrax is any good I might suck it up and do it.

Oh god, absolutely. Watched it with friends with Rifftrax. It's amazing.

/lllllllllllllllllllladies?


Men who look like llllllllllllllllladies.
 
2010-02-18 03:51:09 PM  

puckrock2000: Like Edward Cullen, Manilow never seems to age.

That's because Founders never age.

/The Great Hotlink


I want to +1 your comment.
 
2010-02-18 03:51:20 PM  
farm1.static.flickr.com
 
2010-02-18 03:51:48 PM  

Xlr8urfark: So I sort of know what Rifftrax movies are, but last I saw you had to buy the movie from their website? Torrenting possible? Anyone? EIP.


/Bueller?


It's worth the few bucks.
 
2010-02-18 03:52:54 PM  
kuu.hopto.org
 
2010-02-18 03:53:06 PM  
cdn.thefrisky.com
 
2010-02-18 03:53:31 PM  
Interesting, what the entomology on the term?

It's just a word that bugs me.
 
2010-02-18 03:54:25 PM  

This chick needs a good dicking.

 
2010-02-18 03:55:02 PM  

lukelightning: Interesting, what the entomology on the term?

It's just a word that bugs me.


I fail at spelling generally, that's what the spellcheck said was right.
 
2010-02-18 03:55:13 PM  
*adds a Jacob pillow to her wishlist*

What? He's legal now.
 
2010-02-18 03:55:35 PM  
SecretAgentWoman

What in the living fark is that?
 
2010-02-18 03:57:28 PM  

Crystal embedded data matrix: SecretAgentWoman

What in the living fark is that?


Why, Robert Pattinson panties with special mouth-at-crotch lining.
 
2010-02-18 03:57:38 PM  

Xlr8urfark: So I sort of know what Rifftrax movies are, but last I saw you had to buy the movie from their website? Torrenting possible? Anyone? EIP.


/Bueller?


You should have email.
 
2010-02-18 03:58:36 PM  

Coconut Tequila: I fail at spelling generally, that's what the spellcheck said was right.


Heh, etymology = word origins. Entomology = study of insects. I remember this because "ent" sounds like "ant".
 
2010-02-18 03:59:04 PM  
SecretAgentWoman:

Creepy. Especially the inner panty portion.
 
2010-02-18 03:59:06 PM  
Team Jessica!

(you know that girl thats also in the George Clooney movie)

rawr.
 
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