FARK.com: (5035688) Swiss prostitutes will be trained to use defibrillators in brothels to prevent clients dying. The safe word is GAAAAAAAA

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		Swiss prostitutes will be trained to use defibrillators in brothels to prevent clients dying. The safe word is GAAAAAAAA (telegraph.co.uk)		67
		More: Amusing, Switzerland, secular, Swiss prostitutes, Eastern Europe

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5483 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2010 at 8:13 AM | Favorite | share:

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Adman12		2010-02-18 07:08:27 AM

Old Italians on Viagra humping young South American trannies in Switzerland, having a heart attack, and being defibrillated by a bunch of naked Romanians.

The Aristocrats.

Little.Alex		2010-02-18 08:14:55 AM

over in 1

Mr. Potatoass		2010-02-18 08:15:20 AM

How many holes does a Swiss prostitute have?

merrymortician		2010-02-18 08:16:57 AM

lol rebounded in 3. NOW it's over.

dittybopper		2010-02-18 08:17:42 AM

My safe word is "Mahalo".

/Obscure?

Thakh		2010-02-18 08:18:33 AM

Prostitution is also legal from the age of 16 in Switzerland.

/just sayin'

buddyrtr		2010-02-18 08:20:11 AM

GREAT headline! Made me laugh so hard I (thump)...

Sgt.Zim		2010-02-18 08:20:30 AM

Err, isn't this a repeat? Or do I need to check my meds again?

zipperlip		2010-02-18 08:20:32 AM

Modern defibrillators are becoming increasingly quick and easy for the lay person to use

Hur hur! Lay person, hur.

FarOutMan		2010-02-18 08:22:02 AM

This is shocking news

Shakespeare's Monkey		2010-02-18 08:24:49 AM

Well, you may not have a heart attack looking at this Swiss woman, but you will get localized high blood pressure.

IYKWIM

/SFW

dalverian		2010-02-18 08:27:07 AM

Mr. Potatoass: How many holes does a Swiss prostitute have?

I love it.

ethics-gradient		2010-02-18 08:27:08 AM

Mmm! That's how I want to check out. Balls deep and with my face between a huge pair of boobies.

littlett's		2010-02-18 08:29:45 AM

Seems to me that if you are in bad enough shape that you are risking a heart attack, you probably shouldn't have rigorous enough sex that it could give you a heart attack.

Mouren		2010-02-18 08:30:10 AM

Mr. Potatoass: How many holes does a Swiss prostitute have?

8.

Unless you count the eyes.

/lolwut.

Harry Freakstorm		2010-02-18 08:30:19 AM

Bork, bork, bork, bork....aaarg! klar! Buzz-zap Buzz-zap. Bork, bork, bork, bork....

Hyppy		2010-02-18 08:30:50 AM

/hawt

Poppyale		2010-02-18 08:31:57 AM

This is necessary? I mean, how often does this happen????
/never gonna be a prostitute now!
//Well, Cherry, that's the 3rd fat hairy guy I've made kick the bucket this week. I'm going back to retail.

Thisbymaster		2010-02-18 08:32:02 AM

I never thought I would die this way, but I had always hoped.

BHShaman		2010-02-18 08:32:22 AM

swiss prostitute???
www.pennysdaybook.com

somemoron		2010-02-18 08:33:10 AM

My curiosity is aroused. Please post pictorial proof of pSwedish pulchritude, please.

littlett's		2010-02-18 08:33:57 AM

BHShaman: swiss prostitute???

I hope that she is sitting on something other than just the straw. That stuff is very scratchy.

somemoron		2010-02-18 08:37:29 AM

Poppyale: This is necessary? I mean, how often does this happen????
/never gonna be a prostitute now!
//Well, Cherry, that's the 3rd fat hairy guy I've made kick the bucket this week. I'm going back to retail.

After seeing your profile pic, and as a fat hairy guy, I'd could think of worse ways to die. Alas, I have not the kind of money that would be required for such a top-tier suicide-by-hottie. *sigh*

\TMI, I know, I know.

Pert		2010-02-18 08:43:07 AM

"I thought he was coming but he was going"

/the safe word is banana

RoxtarRyan		2010-02-18 08:47:01 AM

Shakespeare's Monkey		2010-02-18 08:51:24 AM

Mrs. Goodman: [At Yale's funeral, he died of heart attack after sex] Please dear, I need to know. What were his last words?
Judy Benjamin: I'm coming.

#2		2010-02-18 08:51:39 AM

COSMO: [in song] You need a bit of... ooh, shock treatment/Get you jumpin' like a real live wire/Need a bit of... ooh, shock treatment/So look out, mister, don't you blow your last resistor for a vista that'll mystify ya!

- 'Shock Treatment' (1981)

Day_Old_Dutchie		2010-02-18 08:53:37 AM

Don't think of them as defibrillators. Think of them as a jump-start for your sex life.

CygnusDarius		2010-02-18 09:05:03 AM

Adman12: Old Italians on Viagra humping young South American trannies in Switzerland, having a heart attack, and being defibrillated by a bunch of naked Romanians.

The Aristocrats.

To then be sent to the hospital by a German ambulance driver.

ReverendJasen		2010-02-18 09:14:48 AM

Maybe some day we Americans can throw off our puritanical chains and join the modern world in ceasing to vilify sex.

sedavies		2010-02-18 09:17:39 AM

Dying customers is bad for business????

They are looking at it the wrong way. How many times have you heard of someone dying on a roller-coaster and subsequently business picking up at the amusement park?

These brothels just need to approach it appropriately.

First, a new marketing slogan:

Sex so good it can kill you!

Then keep a tally of the deceased and resusciated on the front door.

They'll have them lining up around the corner.

loonatic112358		2010-02-18 09:21:39 AM

buddyrtr: GREAT headline! Made me laugh so hard I (thump)...

CLEAR

Heamer		2010-02-18 09:22:09 AM

The retired paramedic who did the CPR/safety training course where I work said that American strip clubs/peep shows have been doing this for years, and that one such gentleman's club (for which he did the safety training) saved the lives of four different men with defibrillators over the course of the very next year. Sh*t works, bro.

DIGITALgimpus		2010-02-18 09:24:12 AM

Pics or they don't exist!

loonatic112358		2010-02-18 09:24:26 AM

littlett's: Seems to me that if you are in bad enough shape that you are risking a heart attack, you probably shouldn't have rigorous enough sex that it could give you a heart attack.

well, like exercise, you don't want to have too strenuous of activity

perhaps these clubs could help their out of shape clients pound their way to health

each of the clients will get their own certified fitness trainer, who knows how to maximize their clients workout time in a synergistic manner optimizing the overall holistic experience

This would then of course, be able to possibly be billed to the Insurance

Scaryduck		2010-02-18 09:29:27 AM

"Has anyone done the 'stiffy' joke yet?"

mhd		2010-02-18 09:29:42 AM

Wanna play 'hide the Nazi gold', nudge, nudge?

etant_donne		2010-02-18 09:32:44 AM

The goal is la petite mort, not la grande mort... but in case of the latter the swiss sex-workers will have you up and going again in just a few minutes eh?

reddc		2010-02-18 09:47:34 AM

sedavies: Dying customers is bad for business????

They are looking at it the wrong way. How many times have you heard of someone dying on a roller-coaster and subsequently business picking up at the amusement park?

These brothels just need to approach it appropriately.

First, a new marketing slogan:

Sex so good it can kill you!

Then keep a tally of the deceased and resusciated on the front door.

They'll have them lining up around the corner.

Not to mention, it's kind of funny how the died with empty wallets, right after they signed the $1000 tip on the credit card!

monoski		2010-02-18 09:49:32 AM

not impressed

ramen_for_all		2010-02-18 09:49:54 AM

Oh, come on. Look if he was dying he wouldn't bother to carve GAAAAAA, he'd just say it!

Wolfmanjames		2010-02-18 09:54:35 AM

Hyppy: /hawt

If you insist..

boodleboxes.com

/hot like the cocoa.
// Will they also do mouth-to-cock resuscitation?

cephalien		2010-02-18 09:56:33 AM

Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nürnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- shönedanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm?

up2nfg		2010-02-18 09:56:54 AM

Suicide by prostitute? This is the way most men want to go.

Thakh		2010-02-18 09:59:14 AM

As a foreigner living in Switzerland I can say...
RoxtarRyan
[pic of Eurotrip wharrgarbl safeword]

THIS.

W2OW		2010-02-18 10:04:02 AM

somemoron: My curiosity is aroused. Please post pictorial proof of pSwedish pulchritude, please.

People still use that word?

dprathbun		2010-02-18 10:07:24 AM

dittybopper: My safe word is "Mahalo".

/Obscure?

No.

Mose		2010-02-18 10:21:59 AM

Hyppy: /hawt

Some people get off on the wierdest things.

Whatever, I'm not one to judge. Here ya go, enjoy it:

www.mmaeonline.com

R.A.Danny		2010-02-18 10:23:32 AM

W2OW: somemoron: My curiosity is aroused. Please post pictorial proof of pSwedish pulchritude, please.

People still use that word?

It's not a bad GIS by any means.