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(The Citizen)   We have nothing to fear except fear itself....and bears   (thelocal.se) divider line 57
    More: Scary, Swedish, Superman Returns, quotas, cold cuts, roast, supper, countryside, double click  
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7959 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Feb 2010 at 2:28 AM (4 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-02-17 12:02:30 AM
Yes, but has Stephen Colbert put "fear" on notice yet?
 
2010-02-17 12:26:31 AM
The bear went over the mountain,
the bear went over the mountain.
The bear went over the mooooouuntaaaaain....and ate some frightened Swede.
 
2010-02-17 12:45:33 AM
i48.tinypic.com

i45.tinypic.com
 
2010-02-17 02:15:59 AM
I grew up in Montana where there are all kinds of bears. Luckily, I never encountered one face-to-face. I would probably have shiat my pants.

I did have a run-in with a huge male moose once, which scared the hell out of me, but he had no interest in me and just walked away. Mother farker was as big as a Clydesdale with a rack about 5 feet wide.
 
2010-02-17 02:24:33 AM
The Bear and the Maiden Fair (copyright by George R.R. Martin/ all rights reserved/ please don't sue)

A bear there was, a bear, a bear!
All black and brown, and covered with hair!
The bear! The bear!
Oh, come, they said, oh come to the fair!
The fair? Said he, but I'm a bear!
All black, and brown, and covered with hair!

And Down the road from here to there.
From here! To There!
Three boys, a goat, and a dancing bear!
[He] danced and spun, all the way to the Fair!
The Fair! The Fair!

Oh, sweet she was, and pure, and fair!
The maid with honey in her hair!
Her hair! Her hair!
The maid with honey in her hair!

[The bear,] smelled the scent on the summer air.
The bear! The bear!
All black and brown and covered with hair.
He smelled the scent on the summer air!
He sniffed and roared and smelled it there!
Honey on the summer air!

Oh, I'm a maid, and I'm pure and fair!
I'll never dance with a hairy bear!
A bear! A bear!
I'll never dance with a hairy bear!
He lifted her high into the air!
The bear! The bear!

I called for a knight, but you're a bear!
A bear! A bear!
All black and brown and covered with hair!
She kicked and wailed, the maid so fair,
But he licked the honey from her hair,
Her hair! Her hair!

Then she sighed and squealed and kicked the air!
My bear! She sang. My bear so fair!
And off they went, from here to there,
The bear, the bear, and the maiden fair.
 
2010-02-17 02:30:19 AM
They're afraid of hairy fat guys?
 
2010-02-17 02:31:18 AM
Mary had a little lamb
She also had a bear
I've seen Mary's little lamb
I've never seen her bare.
 
2010-02-17 02:31:52 AM
What about spiders?
 
MBK [TotalFark]
2010-02-17 02:32:29 AM
Man, imagine a spider bear. That would be some freaky shiat.
 
2010-02-17 02:33:08 AM
real_headhoncho: What about spiders?

I once had a spider climb up inside my kilt.
 
2010-02-17 02:33:36 AM
MBK: Man, imagine a spider bear. That would be some freaky shiat.

Spider-bear walrus!
 
2010-02-17 02:36:36 AM
GranoblasticMan: MBK: Man, imagine a spider bear. That would be some freaky shiat.

Spider-bear walrus!


Jaimie from Mythbusters with extra robotic arms?
 
2010-02-17 02:37:05 AM
img402.imageshack.us
 
2010-02-17 02:39:11 AM
i1019.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-17 02:39:30 AM
Veteran of the Cola Wars: GranoblasticMan: MBK: Man, imagine a spider bear. That would be some freaky shiat.

Spider-bear walrus!

Jaimie from Mythbusters with extra robotic arms?


i16.photobucket.com

/ Since you mentioned him
// I know it's old, whatever
 
2010-02-17 02:39:44 AM
Silly Swedes.
 
2010-02-17 02:40:31 AM
And snakes!
 
2010-02-17 02:40:50 AM
No møøse? I'm told møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti....
 
2010-02-17 02:41:03 AM
BEARS!!!

www.enzymes.at
 
2010-02-17 02:42:08 AM
Went paint balling near Whistler Mountain where the bears ate the unexploded paint balls. They are just vegetable oil and food colouring for this exact reason. Anyhow, the bears would come right onto the course during the matches and cared little when the managers tried to scare them off with bear scare bombs.

/ the bear scat was nicely coloured though
 
2010-02-17 02:42:12 AM
And wearwolves!
 
2010-02-17 02:44:41 AM
i1019.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-17 02:50:52 AM
i63.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-17 02:51:10 AM
Educating yourself is key to overcoming fear of almost anything.

The More You Know (new window)
 
2010-02-17 02:52:29 AM
Any sightings of the Bearjew?
 
2010-02-17 03:03:31 AM
real_headhoncho: What about spiders?

Well yes, and spiders. That goes without saying.

/and snakes.
//don't forget werewolves.
 
2010-02-17 03:06:09 AM
real_headhoncho: And snakes!

real_headhoncho: And wearwolves!

Crud. I gotta start reading *all* the comments before I post.
 
2010-02-17 03:06:34 AM
spiderbears

/oh
//my
///GOD
 
2010-02-17 03:07:18 AM
I had a close encounter with a bear when I was a kid. Me and Mom were out hiking and I asked her if there were any bears in the area. Thinking I was afraid she reassured me that there weren't. Five minutes later a black bear charged across the path behind us.

We found out later that it had been spooked by a group of teenagers bouncing on a log.
 
2010-02-17 03:10:47 AM
MBK: Man, imagine a spider bear. That would be some freaky shiat.

This will haunt my dreams.

Then I'll make a movie with spider bears and make millions.
 
2010-02-17 03:11:21 AM
FTFA

"We're not at all out in nature to the same extent as before so we don't really know how to react if we bump into wild animals"


The best repsonse is to run faster than the other people with you.
 
2010-02-17 03:13:23 AM
NobleHam: This will haunt my dreams.

What? This?
www.hahastop.com
 
2010-02-17 03:39:05 AM
and Johnson's wife.
 
2010-02-17 04:10:47 AM
Obligatory comment about The Local's sidebar links to galleries full of Swedish nightclub hotties.

www.thelocal.se
/hot like every other girl in a Swedish nightclub
 
2010-02-17 04:25:08 AM
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2010-02-17 04:25:58 AM
Epsilon: I grew up in Montana where there are all kinds of bears. Luckily, I never encountered one face-to-face. I would probably have shiat my pants.

I did have a run-in with a huge male moose once, which scared the hell out of me, but he had no interest in me and just walked away. Mother farker was as big as a Clydesdale with a rack about 5 feet wide.


I've run across some critters while hiking. Not so scary was a young rattlesnake and scariest was a mountain lion. Fortunately, he mountain lion decided not to eat me.
 
2010-02-17 05:26:56 AM
g
Geez, I have a video of a friend doing a bear by a spear. It is sick!
 
2010-02-17 06:09:54 AM
1.bp.blogspot.com

GIS for Swedish bear. The danger seems real enough, just don't get between the big one and the little one. Also, don't go to Sweden.
 
2010-02-17 06:32:10 AM
Shakespeare's Monkey: GIS for Swedish bear. The danger seems real enough, just don't get between the big one and the little one. Also, don't go to Sweden.

I was going to say, "That's no bear." but he is wearing a fanny pack...
 
2010-02-17 06:34:44 AM
msp51.photobucket.com

I have no idea.
 
2010-02-17 06:51:18 AM
Still cackle about the time my Euro friends came to Canada and I took them for a hike in Waterton National Park (Above Glacier National Park, Montana for you Yankees). Literally on a 1 hour hike saw 5 bears (4 blacks and a Grizzly). The poor saps where nearly sh*tting themselves.

Can only imagine the mental picture they have of Canada now.
 
2010-02-17 07:17:04 AM
Brick Tamland: [opposing women in the newsroom] I read somewhere their periods attract bears. Bears can smell the menstruation.
Brian Fantana: Well, that's just great. You hear that, Ed? Bears. Now you're putting the whole station in jeopardy.
 
2010-02-17 07:33:59 AM
real_headhoncho: What about spiders?

"You mean spiders on the field, Coach?"
 
2010-02-17 08:10:12 AM
The numbers of wild animals, which are protected in Sweden by strict hunting quotas, has risen steadily in recent decades to an estimated 3,000 bears, 150,000 wlld boar and 300,000 elk.

When surveys began in the 1980s most Swedes feared encountering an elk


What about moose? I thought most Swedes' sisters had been bitten by a moose. I understand moose bites can be pretty nasty.
 
2010-02-17 08:20:49 AM
real_headhoncho: And wearwolves!

Werewolves aren't real!
 
2010-02-17 08:27:31 AM
I just came in to applaud the headline. :)
 
2010-02-17 08:39:51 AM
OscarTamerz: The numbers of wild animals, which are protected in Sweden by strict hunting quotas, has risen steadily in recent decades to an estimated 3,000 bears, 150,000 wlld boar and 300,000 elk.

When surveys began in the 1980s most Swedes feared encountering an elk

What about moose? I thought most Swedes' sisters had been bitten by a moose. I understand moose bites can be pretty nasty.


"The name elk is connected with the Latin alces, and with Old Norse elgr, Scandinavian elg, and German Elch,[3] all of which refer to the animal known in North America as the moose."
 
2010-02-17 09:28:12 AM
i23.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-17 09:31:05 AM
As a patrolman in a National Park, i'm getting a kick....
 
2010-02-17 09:57:56 AM
They can smell the menstruation!
 
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