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(Some News from orway)   Want to immigrate to Norway, ranked as the best place in the world to live? Get in line, the queue is three years long   (newsinenglish.no ) divider line
    More: PSA, Norway, justice ministers, level of service, immigration, visas, Norwegian, mental hospital, European countries  
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10659 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Feb 2010 at 9:51 AM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2010-02-11 08:56:06 AM  
Well duh... most, like 80% of the women over there are very attractive... and obesity is rare.

Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka
 
2010-02-11 09:34:19 AM  
I'm here for the pics of the hot Norwegian women.
 
2010-02-11 09:35:12 AM  

OlafTheBent: Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka


I think I could live with that given the surroundings.
 
2010-02-11 09:53:45 AM  

PFRboy: I'm here for the pics of the hot Norwegian women.


sharkspage.com
 
2010-02-11 09:54:01 AM  
Forget Norway.
 
2010-02-11 09:54:34 AM  
Stop saying queue.
 
2010-02-11 09:54:57 AM  
I often wonder why grandpa brap left Norway. I wouldn't mind getting a visa. i would be willing to summer over there. If immigration officials in Oslo are readling this and can hook me up, I bring a skill set. I can bring back the lost art of making coil pots and I give a pretty mean backrub.
 
2010-02-11 09:55:53 AM  
I want to go there and become an illegal alien.

/i think there is a trip to hell in my future...
 
2010-02-11 09:56:53 AM  
They racis.
 
2010-02-11 09:57:56 AM  
I would love to live there...or Denmark.

High literacy rate, low unemployment, very good national health care, low percentage of population are religious.

Yeah, put me on the list.
 
2010-02-11 09:58:11 AM  
HA! And my great-great-great-grandpa left because it sucked.
 
2010-02-11 09:58:16 AM  

OlafTheBent: Well duh... most, like 80% of the women over there are very attractive... and obesity is rare.

Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka


You don't have to drink as much because the women are gorgeous.

/It's a mathematical formula.
 
2010-02-11 09:58:26 AM  
I agree, these people are racist monsters.
 
2010-02-11 09:58:52 AM  

OlafTheBent: Well duh... most, like 80% of the women over there are very attractive... and obesity is rare.

Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka


Taxing the pleasures of life....

Oh, well.
 
2010-02-11 09:59:35 AM  

tricycleracer: OlafTheBent: Well duh... most, like 80% of the women over there are very attractive... and obesity is rare.

Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka

You don't have to drink as much because the women are gorgeous.

/It's a mathematical formula.


The vodak is for them.
 
2010-02-11 09:59:44 AM  
Why should there be a line at all? They are preventing people from exercising their rights. Nobody is illegal.
 
2010-02-11 10:00:05 AM  
Eventually the oil will run out.

And yes, they have beautiful women. All kinds of Norwegian decent people around here.
 
2010-02-11 10:00:22 AM  
Enjoy VATs.
 
2010-02-11 10:01:08 AM  
GIS for Norwegian girls -
gamesnet.vo.llnwd.net


Yeah, OK.
 
2010-02-11 10:01:44 AM  

godofusa.com: Enjoy VATs.


Off to Somalia with you - no taxes.
 
2010-02-11 10:02:43 AM  

godofusa.com: VATs


Video-Assisted Thoracoscopic surgery?

Is that mandatory?
 
#2 [TotalFark]
2010-02-11 10:03:18 AM  
KASTNER. All right my posture is bad, all right I slump in my chair. But I've had more women than either of you two! I've had half bloody Norway, that's what I've had!

- 'Monty Python's Flying Circus' Episode 21
 
2010-02-11 10:04:33 AM  
I know of an Eritrean engineer who just defected there. He slipped his handlers in Rome and some relatives got him on a train to another relative's place in Geneva where he laid low for a while and then took another train to Norway where he had asylum.

So I'm getting a kick out of knowing that as an engineer it increases my odds of emigrating if need be.
 
2010-02-11 10:04:56 AM  

OlafTheBent: Well duh... most, like 80% of the women over there are very attractive... and obesity is rare.

Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka


Who the hell can a fjord that?
 
2010-02-11 10:05:05 AM  
Just three? It's ten to get into the US.

/Just for perspective
//Has a great uncle who'll probably be dead before he gets in
 
2010-02-11 10:05:34 AM  
I was waiting in line until a mööse bit me.
 
2010-02-11 10:05:55 AM  

Rapmaster2000: I know of an Eritrean engineer who just defected there. He slipped his handlers in Rome and some relatives got him on a train to another relative's place in Geneva where he laid low for a while and then took another train to Norway where he had asylum.

So I'm getting a kick out of knowing that as an engineer it increases my odds of emigrating if need be.


Read that as defecated.
 
2010-02-11 10:06:46 AM  
All the illegal immigrants due of hypothermia swimming across the north see. Also rather than a fence they have miles and miles of frozen tundra to keep the swarms out.

If they were next to Mexico I am thinking el' queueito might be meaningless.
 
2010-02-11 10:06:58 AM  
No, no I do not.
A friend of mine moved there a few years ago. He makes about 25% more than he made here, but spends 2000 Euros a month for a bachelor apartment is Oslo.
 
2010-02-11 10:07:39 AM  

Clete Orris: Rapmaster2000: I know of an Eritrean engineer who just defected there. He slipped his handlers in Rome and some relatives got him on a train to another relative's place in Geneva where he laid low for a while and then took another train to Norway where he had asylum.

So I'm getting a kick out of knowing that as an engineer it increases my odds of emigrating if need be.

Read that as defecated.


That's accurate. He's been there for 6 months.
 
2010-02-11 10:07:50 AM  
My girlfriend is of Norwegian descent.

/I'm happy
 
2010-02-11 10:09:04 AM  
I'd love to live in Norway - beautiful women, scenery, no crime etc. To get round the booze issue you could just take a city break somewhere else in Europe and bring back a shiat-load of duty free, or whatever it's called now.

/Always took a few bottles of whisky with me when going to Norway
 
2010-02-11 10:09:22 AM  

godofusa.com: Enjoy VATs.


You know, it's stunning to me that there are people who could be living in a paradise with beautiful people, good food, a generally happy society, higher life expectancy, healthier environment, fun things to do, and yet say "What, a few cents tax? Well fark THAT."

I'm not saying Norway is that paradise, but seriously, STFU. If the VAT is the only negative that gets brought up about someplace, then things are pretty damn good.

On the other hand, there's people here that say "What, roads and police? Of course I want those things. What, we need to pay for them? They cost money? fark THAT!" So maybe it doesn't surprise me.
 
2010-02-11 10:09:34 AM  
I was dating a Norwegian woman for a while, and considered the possibility of shacking up and splitting the States with her. The plan was perfect, except for the whole marrying a crazy woman thing.
 
2010-02-11 10:09:39 AM  

Clete Orris: Read that as defecated.


I hope he didn't have to wait three years for that.

FlyingGeek: I would love to live there...or Denmark.


The Dutch are scum.
 
2010-02-11 10:10:27 AM  
BTW, the women are horrible lays.
 
2010-02-11 10:10:47 AM  

TheGogmagog: Forget Norway.


i24.photobucket.com
 
2010-02-11 10:12:21 AM  

Rapmaster2000: I know of an Eritrean engineer who just defected there. He slipped his handlers in Rome and some relatives got him on a train to another relative's place in Geneva where he laid low for a while and then took another train to Norway where he had asylum.

So I'm getting a kick out of knowing that as an engineer it increases my odds of emigrating if need be.


THIS is what immigration should be to the US...bring us every single farking engineer from Mexico, China, Russia, Brazil, Vietnam, etc...fark em

Australia isn't so bad either. They have a "points" system, and they don't allow HIV (butt pirates) positive people either...
 
2010-02-11 10:13:10 AM  

OlafTheBent: Well duh... most, like 80% of the women over there are very attractive... and obesity is rare.

Too bad it's $80.00 for a litre of vodka


My brief time in Bergen, Norway showed me that not only are there a lot of good-looking women, they're also easy to approach and well, easy. I was happy to see that the platinum blonde thing is just what girls in Oslo do to be fashionable; I met brunettes, red-heads, and all with a variety of (pale to not pale) skin tones. It was awesome and damn near killed me within a week.
 
2010-02-11 10:13:11 AM  
The Mexicans have long known that it is almost impossible to immigrate to Norway, and this situation has entered the language as a term to mean something is virtually impossible... surely you've heard the phrase "Norway, José!"
 
2010-02-11 10:13:29 AM  
That'd be cool and all, but I don't speak Norwish.
 
2010-02-11 10:13:29 AM  

krazydiamond: No, no I do not.
A friend of mine moved there a few years ago. He makes about 25% more than he made here, but spends 2000 Euros a month for a bachelor apartment is Oslo.


Rent does tend to go down when one moves outside of metropolitan areas.
 
2010-02-11 10:13:42 AM  
Hmmm...I have family in Norway. I'm sure that could be used to skip the line, somehow.

Also: Norwegians are clearly superior to everyone else.
 
2010-02-11 10:14:00 AM  
I interviewed for a job with a film school in Oslo recently. Unfortunately I didn't get the gig. By the way if you want to live in the far northern reaches (can't remember the name of the town) near the Arctic circle they have a work-permit free zone. Anyone can work there without the need for special paperwork. Personally I'd love to get citizenship there. The only downside as far as I can see would be high property prices and high booze prices.
 
2010-02-11 10:14:55 AM  
What, and freeze to death or be eaten by a troll or chopped in half by a viking?
 
2010-02-11 10:15:00 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Clete Orris: Rapmaster2000: I know of an Eritrean engineer who just defected there. He slipped his handlers in Rome and some relatives got him on a train to another relative's place in Geneva where he laid low for a while and then took another train to Norway where he had asylum.

So I'm getting a kick out of knowing that as an engineer it increases my odds of emigrating if need be.

Read that as defecated.

That's accurate. He's been there for 6 months.


Wow, those immigration guys are hardcore.

What's VATs? Other than the sniping thing in Fallout 3.
 
2010-02-11 10:15:03 AM  
Moving to a place that has even colder weather then New England? FARK that, If I move any place it is going to be nice and warm.
 
2010-02-11 10:15:04 AM  

G. Tarrant: godofusa.com: Enjoy VATs.

You know, it's stunning to me that there are people who could be living in a paradise with beautiful people, good food, a generally happy society, higher life expectancy, healthier environment, fun things to do, and yet say "What, a few cents tax? Well fark THAT."


It doesn't cost a 50% tax rate for those things. Government waste money.
I'm not saying Norway is that paradise, but seriously, STFU. If the VAT is the only negative that gets brought up about someplace, then things are pretty damn good.

On the other hand, there's people here that say "What, roads and police? Of course I want those things. What, we need to pay for them? They cost money? fark THAT!" So maybe it doesn't surprise me.

 
2010-02-11 10:15:58 AM  
Yeah, go to Norway and enjoy your Muslum riots.

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2010-02-11 10:16:09 AM  
Isn't it friggin cold there?

No thanks.
 
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