'We just want the same c**p broadband service as everybody else in the village but BT won't even let us have that.'

coop?
carp?

c**p


They censor "crap"? Seriously?

crab66: c**p


They censor "crap"? Seriously?

But not Cumbria!

crab66: c**p


They censor "crap"? Seriously?

The daily Fail is really sensitive about that stuff; sure they'll foam at the mouth about the ludicrousness of political correctness, but the moment there's swearing or hints of sex, especially pre 9pm GMT on any of the BBC's channels or radio stations...

Thenixon: crab66: c**p


They censor "crap"? Seriously?

But not Cumbria!

It's even more insane, they don't bother censoring B*****m!

Holy shiat. I wasn't aware that Comcast operated across the pond.

/fark you, comcast.
//fark you long, and fark you hard.

crab66: c**p


They censor "crap"? Seriously?

Mildly rude words give Daily Mail readers heart palpitations.

do they not have cable television? can't they get cable broadband? may as well get an iphone if you using dial up, 3g has to be faster than dial up no?

That'll be 45,000 PMITA's, please.

Your guesthouse business doesn't need broadband. Nor do you.

So, cough up the money or STFU.

So what is that, like $15?


/Not in this economy!

This just in: Things cost money.

That said, if you are actually maxed out and even if there's just one more guy that wants service.... take the cost and spread it across the 151. Per month, per user, it probably comes out to be fairly cheap (what are we talking...300 quid per person? So bump up rates a little and it works itself out eventually... especially when it's apparent that there is no alternative.) I'm sure the current users will appreciate the bump in speed that would come along with throwing down another CO.

GoodyearPimp: This just in: Things cost money.

That said, if you are actually maxed out and even if there's just one more guy that wants service.... take the cost and spread it across the 151. Per month, per user, it probably comes out to be fairly cheap (what are we talking...300 quid per person? So bump up rates a little and it works itself out eventually... especially when it's apparent that there is no alternative.) I'm sure the current users will appreciate the bump in speed that would come along with throwing down another CO.

Which is what every other marginally sane provider does, I'd wager.

Klitch: do they not have cable television? can't they get cable broadband?

Extremely unlikely. The cable network covers maybe half of the population, and all in urban areas. ADSL is available almost everywhere.

It's amazing that they can charge a customer the cost of backbone gear as an installation fee. Doesn't backbone gear have to be covered by the company, and then recouped by standard contract fees?

farkeruk: Your guesthouse business doesn't need broadband. Nor do you.

So, cough up the money or STFU.

1/10 You need a little bit more elitism to really get some bites. Also helps if you can push the blame for the problem on to the victims.

Contrabulous Flabtraption: is that a lot?

It's almost 25 tons!!

bemis23: farkeruk: Your guesthouse business doesn't need broadband. Nor do you.

So, cough up the money or STFU.

1/10 You need a little bit more elitism to really get some bites. Also helps if you can push the blame for the problem on to the victims.


How do you give any points at all to a troll that doesnt get any bites? I see this all the time and it is baffling to me.

No bites should equal no points.
0/10

We wanted new business service from AT&T to one of our facilities in Utah. Sure they said, it will just cost $50,000.

We told them to forget it.

loathable cockroach: hints of sex

If "crap" hints of "sex", you're having the wrong kind of sex. Or maybe the right kind, I guess.

Are they that bad at business?
Spread the costs over your consumer base. Small fee increase for everyone that corresponds to an increase in quality, as well as one new set of happy customers.
Instead, they're ticking off a potential consumer and getting really bad rep.

Though I'm guessing there's less competition for Internet service than there is even here in Canada, so those factors probably matter little to the ISP.

RobinTheHood: bemis23: farkeruk: Your guesthouse business doesn't need broadband. Nor do you.

So, cough up the money or STFU.

1/10 You need a little bit more elitism to really get some bites. Also helps if you can push the blame for the problem on to the victims.


How do you give any points at all to a troll that doesnt get any bites? I see this all the time and it is baffling to me.

No bites should equal no points.
0/10

Awarded a half point for effort and a half point for brevity. Lame trolls go on too long and make it too obvious.

Can you really put a price on broad band pron?

I don't think so.

As one stuck in a no-broadband area, I can appreciate. As one with Cable Internet less than 1/2 mile from my house with repeated denials from cable company to extend service, I can REALLY appreciate.

/farking currently on my iPhone.
//edge not 3g

TsukasaK: Holy shiat. I wasn't aware that Comcast operated across the pond.

/fark you, comcast.
//fark you long, and fark you hard.

In England a car's trunk is the boot. A car's hood is the bonnet. Comcast (gouging monopoly notorious for s**t service, incompetence, etc.) is called British Telecom (BT for short).

/I speak some British English.
//Slashies are called slashies.

tomcatadam:

Though I'm guessing there's less competition for Internet service than there is even here in Canada, so those factors probably matter little to the ISP.

There's huge competition for internet providers here, I can choose from about 43. See Here (new window)

But almost all of them use BT wire. BT has to let any ISP use their network, you could start an ISP in your bedroom and serve the whole country.

What this chap wants to do is leave BT and get his internet from another provider, but they have to buy the line from BT, so BT tell them they will have to pay the cost of upgrading the line.

It generally works very well, unless you live in some remote village miles from anywhere.

No one posted this yet?
NSFWLink (new window)

tomcatadam: Are they that bad at business?
Spread the costs over your consumer base. Small fee increase for everyone that corresponds to an increase in quality, as well as one new set of happy customers.
Instead, they're ticking off a potential consumer and getting really bad rep.

I suspect they couldn't do that even if they wanted to. The rates that BT can charge other ISPs/phone companies are regulated, and they wouldn't be allowed to increase them for the other customers. On the whole it works fairly well - there's lots of competition at retail level and prices are pretty low. Unless you're this guy.

So when he moves, he gets to take the gear with him, right?

Right?

>.

I know exactly how this guy feels.

I went into the mall to buy a t-shirt last week and they wanted $154,019 for it. They said it was $19 for the shirt, and $154,000 for the manufacturing, storage, and distribution facilities.

Oh wait, never mind. I just paid $19. Amazingly, the company selling the t-shirts was responsible for those costs, and they planned to recoup them from the profits of the shirts they sell.

Who knew?

BleedPinstripes: I know exactly how this guy feels.

I went into the mall to buy a t-shirt last week and they wanted $154,019 for it. They said it was $19 for the shirt, and $154,000 for the manufacturing, storage, and distribution facilities.

Oh wait, never mind. I just paid $19. Amazingly, the company selling the t-shirts was responsible for those costs, and they planned to recoup them from the profits of the shirts they sell.

Who knew?

Similar thing happened to me. I was going to get a new cell phone, but they said I'd have to pay for two new cell towers because they were nearing their capacity.

But jokes on them; I waited outside till the next customer paid for the new towers and went in and paid regular price.

This guy is out of luck for cheap broadband:

1. He's on a DACS line, sort of a modern day, digital, party line.

2. His local exchange's DSLAM is at capacity, 150 connections (or 3x50 etc.)

3. Cable is out of the question, all of the cable TV companies cherry picked customers in the 80s and 90s. Basically, if he doesn't have cable TV and his next door neighbours don't have cable TV they're not going to dig up the road just for him.

4. WiFi. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, he doesn't live in a city.

His only options are 3G or satellite, pay for a Vodafone dongle or jailbreak an iPhone.

Highspeed wireless, if available, sat, 3G or pringles can to a neighbour.

Thenixon: crab66: c**p


They censor "crap"? Seriously?

But not Cumbria!

And not the picture of 90 pound Patrick Swayze. The Daily Mail is called a rag for a reason

...

It's the daily fail. It's made to enrage people, and that is exactly how the article is written.

Can we ban this crap from fark, or at least give anything submitted by the daily fail as amusing?

bweebar: This guy is out of luck for cheap broadband:

1. He's on a DACS line, sort of a modern day, digital, party line.

2. His local exchange's DSLAM is at capacity, 150 connections (or 3x50 etc.)

3. Cable is out of the question, all of the cable TV companies cherry picked customers in the 80s and 90s. Basically, if he doesn't have cable TV and his next door neighbours don't have cable TV they're not going to dig up the road just for him.

4. WiFi. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, he doesn't live in a city.

His only options are 3G or satellite, pay for a Vodafone dongle or jailbreak an iPhone.

Oh sweet crap. So, they're using the ancient cable network where you share bandwidth with the entire neighborhood?

If someone chooses to live in a tiny village in the middle of nowhere they should expect broadband coverage to be minimal or nonexistent. If they want super-duper fast internets, they should move to the city.

End. Of.

It's their choice.

And yes, can we somehow petition the Farkin' Powers That Be to stop greenlighting the Daily Fail?

dragonhead: If someone chooses to live in a tiny village in the middle of nowhere they should expect broadband coverage to be minimal or nonexistent. If they want super-duper fast internets, they should move to the city.

End. Of.

It's their choice.

Exactly. It's like all this Post Office nonsense where Post Offices were subsidised to around £10/letter.

I don't get subsidised on my insurance costs because I live in an urban area. So, I don't see why any rural choices should get the same.

Someone should tell them you can get unlimited mobile broadband for £10/month in the UK.

Foaming: Semprini?!?

That is IT. You are under arrest, you filth merchant.

Just FYI that's about 70,300 US dollars

BT are buggers for doing this, happens all the time, I had to pay an extortionate re-connection charge to get a phone line "installed" as a fault might have occurred in the 3 days from them disconnecting the previous household and connecting me back up!

Hmmm. Long shot, but can they try satellite internet service?