Insert that "100 Conundrums" guy here.

Did he smack her?

I fail to see the problem, they're married, everyone knows, and she said she loved him? Which cat is out of the bag?

But the Halo hitmaker insists Jay-Z wasn't angry with her for the slip, revealing: "He said you have six Grammys and you smell good."

SUBMITTER FAIL!!!

Sign of a good marriage: Your wife (international superstar) thanks you (international superstar) for supporting her during an acceptance speech for her international superstar award, and then promptly runs offstage because she forgot she isn't supposed to tell people you are in a loving relationship.

"you have six grammys and you smell good"

weirdest come-on line ever...though I'll give it a shot at the bar tonight

Why the long face, weird guy?

He's nailing alicia keys

I feel bad for him, son.

Yeah, that poor guy.

Pierce Brosnan sure has aged a lot...damn.

AmazinTim: Sign of a good marriage: Your wife (international superstar) thanks you (international superstar) for supporting her during an acceptance speech for her international superstar award, and then promptly runs offstage because she forgot she isn't supposed to tell people you are in a loving relationship.

Hoooney stop it you're making me look soft! I'm a gangsta! I'm badass! waaaaaah

Hey, thanks ContactMusic.....I open your shiatty ass webpage and my virus protection goes nuts. Go fark yourself.

Beyonce looks like she smells like sweet peaches and cocoa butter. Mmmmm mmm, what a lovely young thing she is.

--infected link--

DubyaHater: Hey, thanks ContactMusic.....I open your shiatty ass webpage and my virus protection goes nuts. Go fark yourself.

MOTHERFARKING THIS

I'm confused. Why is it bad she said she loved him?

Better dump her Jay-Z, she clearly isn't up to your standards.

what a disfunctional couple. This shows why Obama is such a bad role-model as a parent and father-figure

He said he's not mad because she won a Grammy and SMELLS GOOD? How is that even remotely related to anything? I guess if Beyonce normally has BO and she decided to get that under control, it would be something to remark on.

wydok: I'm confused. Why is it bad she said she loved him?

She should know her place.

homarjr: DubyaHater: Hey, thanks ContactMusic.....I open your shiatty ass webpage and my virus protection goes nuts. Go fark yourself.

MOTHERFARKING THIS

Oh thank God. I thought I was the only one. XD;

hey critics, you can kiss his whole asshole

wydok: I'm confused. Why is it bad she said she loved him?

It's not. This is ContactMusic at its finest.

homarjr: DubyaHater: Hey, thanks ContactMusic.....I open your shiatty ass webpage and my virus protection goes nuts. Go fark yourself.

MOTHERFARKING THIS

Huh? Nothing wrong when I open with either Safari or Firefox. Perhaps you're using the wrong browser.

I find it strange that he's so private about their love. But compared to douchebags like will.i.am, he seems to have more class, less ego and attention whoring.

/yeah, I said "seems"
//who knows what's really up

TheyCallThisWork: I feel bad for him, son.

LOL! Perfect 10.

Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Being thanked by a famous wife as she wins a major award?

didn't happen with this couple...

I didn't know Swanks was married to E

There's obviously an infected ad in one of their banner rotations, which is why it isn't hitting everyone. The page didn't even load for me before AV shut it down, indicating that whatever it was (mine said "fake antivirus request", so probably one of those "OMG You're infected dood! Install me now or ur ded lol!" things) tried to redirect you somewhere bad.

All I actually saw was "Page Could Not Be Displayed", apparently because Symantec Endpoint Protection kicks more ass than previously advertised...

Now if only it would stop detecting an unidentified tracking cookie and pretending to delete it every 20 minutes, whether there is anything in the Cookies folder or a working Internet connection or not...

Your company should be dissolved and all assets immediately forfeit the instant you provide an ad like this to a client website.

You should also be forbidden to engage in any form of commerce other than cashing a paycheck for the rest of your life if you're ever convicted of pulling this shiat.

TheOtherGuy: There's obviously an infected ad in one of their banner rotations, which is why it isn't hitting everyone. The page didn't even load for me before AV shut it down, indicating that whatever it was (mine said "fake antivirus request", so probably one of those "OMG You're infected dood! Install me now or ur ded lol!" things) tried to redirect you somewhere bad.

All I actually saw was "Page Could Not Be Displayed", apparently because Symantec Endpoint Protection kicks more ass than previously advertised...

Now if only it would stop detecting an unidentified tracking cookie and pretending to delete it every 20 minutes, whether there is anything in the Cookies folder or a working Internet connection or not...

Your company should be dissolved and all assets immediately forfeit the instant you provide an ad like this to a client website.

You should also be forbidden to engage in any form of commerce other than cashing a paycheck for the rest of your life if you're ever convicted of pulling this shiat.

Fully agreed. It's great. I have gotten hit twice by the "I'm antivirus software"...at work...It loads in the back ground...I didn't accept it. Then porn porn porn.

I think it is pretty sad that my corporate software failed to stop that thing twice on multiple computers in my building along with many one time shots.

I used Trend Micro at home and have never had a problem. I dumped Symantec when it failed at warning/stopping Vondu from ruining my last machine.

she gets whiter all the time

My friend showed me a video she's in, where she's dressed in this slutty Transformers bikini getup.

Dammit, Beyoncé, you're too classy for that sh*t. Put on an evening gown and be glamorous and leave the trashy crap to Britney.

mrEdude: she gets whiter all the time

It's all about the camera settings. If they had adjusted the color so her skin looked closer to real life, the guy would have looked like a vampire. Works the other way, too.

Rose of Sharon: My friend showed me a video she's in, where she's dressed in this slutty Transformers bikini getup.

Dammit, Beyoncé, you're too classy for that sh*t. Put on an evening gown and be glamorous and leave the trashy crap to Britney.

Never seen a Beyonce clip before, have? Girl dresses like that more than she dresses classy.

DubyaHater: Hey, thanks ContactMusic.....I open your shiatty ass webpage and my virus protection goes nuts. Go fark yourself

uh oh. really? mine didn't.... :-O

thanks for the heads up

/checks for updates
// scans
///

'asinine' tag should b for the subby...

can u please explain to me, subby, how Jay-Z's wife saying she loves him is a 'problem'?

ill b waiting..but wont hold my breath

Rose of Sharon: My friend showed me a video she's in, where she's dressed in this slutty Transformers bikini getup.

Dammit, Beyoncé, you're too classy for that sh*t. Put on an evening gown and be glamorous and leave the trashy crap to Britney.

Please show me this video so I may form an opinion on it.

TheOtherGuy: There's obviously an infected ad in one of their banner rotations, which is why it isn't hitting everyone. The page didn't even load for me before AV shut it down, indicating that whatever it was (mine said "fake antivirus request", so probably one of those "OMG You're infected dood! Install me now or ur ded lol!" things) tried to redirect you somewhere bad.

All I actually saw was "Page Could Not Be Displayed", apparently because Symantec Endpoint Protection kicks more ass than previously advertised...

Now if only it would stop detecting an unidentified tracking cookie and pretending to delete it every 20 minutes, whether there is anything in the Cookies folder or a working Internet connection or not...

Your company should be dissolved and all assets immediately forfeit the instant you provide an ad like this to a client website.

You should also be forbidden to engage in any form of commerce other than cashing a paycheck for the rest of your life if you're ever convicted of pulling this shiat.

Was this using FF with noscript and adblock? I haven't clicked on the link yet, and I'm not going to at this point, but I'd like to know for future reference.

Rose of Sharon: My friend showed me a video she's in, where she's dressed in this slutty Transformers bikini getup.

Dammit, Beyoncé, you're too classy for that sh*t. Put on an evening gown and be glamorous and leave the trashy crap to Britney.

classy my ass! She is a moderately talented singer who is very good looking. She survives on "average" talent, amazing looks, shaking her ass. She basically married a father figure.

She cannot hold a candle to Alicia Keys talent wise. Plus, she is a horrible actress...and kinda dumb. But hey, she is still rich as hell. She is basically pre-mom jeans Jessica Simpson

virus blocked. not worth the trouble.

A married woman saying she loves her husband? Oh the humanity!
/Even though she's built kinda like a linebacker

tangent: I have AVG free....will that alert me when I go to an infected site?

bankssurething: 'asinine'

Shut up right now. Seriously, how freaking hard is it to use full words - you aren't texting your BFF.

Rose of Sharon: My friend showed me a video she's in, where she's dressed in this slutty Transformers bikini getup.

Dammit, Beyoncé, you're too classy for that sh*t. Put on an evening gown and be glamorous and leave the trashy crap to Britney.

She's growing into her classiness. She has been quite trashy in the past, but she's changed a lot in the past couple years. Jay has too. Good for them. Goes to show that married life really can make an adult of you.

So he doesn't like when she says ILY, and his compliment is 'you have six Grammies and you smell good'

Okay, the dude's gotta have Asperger's. I mean I never wanted to make fun of him like that because he legit looks like a retarded Joe Camel, but seriously.

I'm fully convinced now that this special-ed kid named Sean Carter watched too many Mafia movies, heard a cassette of OB4CL, started jumping around his bedroom rhyming and making gun noises, and before long, Reasonable Doubt.

destitute college kid: Rose of Sharon: My friend showed me a video she's in, where she's dressed in this slutty Transformers bikini getup.

Dammit, Beyoncé, you're too classy for that sh*t. Put on an evening gown and be glamorous and leave the trashy crap to Britney.

She's growing into her classiness. She has been quite trashy in the past, but she's changed a lot in the past couple years. Jay has too. Good for them. Goes to show that married life really can make an adult of you.

Grabbing her crotch while wearing a dress just last week at The Grammys (@ 00:58) wasn't very classy.

/have nothing against Beyonce
//just replying to your comment

Funbags: Why the long face, weird guy?

That's Terry Lundgren, CEO of Macy's, pimping Beyonce's new fragrance, Heat.

bankssurething: 'asinine' tag should b for the subby...

can u please explain to me, subby, how Jay-Z's wife saying she loves him is a 'problem'?

ill b waiting..but wont hold my breath

Subby here:
Evidently Jay-Z has the problem, not that there is a problem inherently. I was informed by a co-worker that Jay-Z and Beyonce separate their married lives from their career lives to the absolute fullest extent they can muster. I find this to be asinine. His comment about not being mad because she has 6 grammys and she smells good is very telling.

/woke my wife up to tell her about my first link
//What is the proper way to celebrate one's first approved link?
///surprise buttsecks?

KnowEyeInnTeem: //What is the proper way to celebrate one's first approved link?
///surprise buttsecks?

Nah, that calls for cuckold gangbang. Call every dude you know, stat. . .

/hot like Beyonce

Ice-T deserves more credit. But he also dressed like a hybrid kangaroo, so I'm torn.

Lord, please pray for the soul of this b*tch and guide my pimp hand and make it strong Lord, so that she might learn a hoe's place. Amen

I don't know much about Jay-Z, but why exactly is this a problem?

Don't know if it'll work out for those two crazy kids, but they have the right idea

I have 99 problems and the virus your link gave me is now one of them.
Thanks Fark.

kenoshaillini: A married woman saying she loves her husband? Oh the humanity!
/Even though she's built kinda like a linebacker

I think Seth Rogan and Paul Rudd might have a little something to say to you.

Mr. Chainsaw: Sympathizes:



/hot like Beyonce

I'm sorry, but I would wreck this chick over and over, right in front of my wife and mother.

srhp29: I used Trend Micro at home and have never had a problem. I dumped Symantec when it failed at warning/stopping Vondu from ruining my last machine.

I use a Mac, don't have any AV programs or firewall (other than what's native to OSX) and haven't had a problem for the 10 years I've been on a Mac.

kenoshaillini: A married woman saying she loves her husband? Oh the humanity!
/Even though she's built kinda like a linebacker

a linebacker..maybe in th elingerie football league.

I understand that some men may not like Serena Williams body attractive. I even understand that Beyonce may not be every guys preference, but saying she is built like a linebacker makes me think you like KKate Moss or some pre-pubescet girl. Honest, you like Taylor Swift don't you?

Derwood: I have AVG free....will that alert me when I go to an infected site?

not in my experience but avast free does. also, ive gotten this same virus warning from i09.com. thanks fark!

Hey, look, what does it take to get a link revoked here? How many people does this have to burn before Fark cuts it off?

I thought that Fark was supposed to be one of those "responsible Internet community" websites. Is it really cool to go posting an infected link like that and just leave it there? Not. Cool.

Oh, and since everyone seems to care, I use the work laptop a lot, so it's plain-vanilla IE8, sorry. Haven't used FF since the 1,897th time it crashed. Even IE performs better than that...

galactus5000: bankssurething: 'asinine'

Shut up right now. Seriously, how freaking hard is it to use full words - you aren't texting your BFF.

aww, poor baby upset cuz u cant read???? ur a joke. how bout i jst use mltple abbrev so tht it esp pisses u off evn mre. i choose to type how i want 2 type, if u have a problem with it, take it with fark and have me banned, biatch ass.

KnowEyeInnTeem: bankssurething: 'asinine' tag should b for the subby...

can u please explain to me, subby, how Jay-Z's wife saying she loves him is a 'problem'?

ill b waiting..but wont hold my breath

Subby here:
Evidently Jay-Z has the problem, not that there is a problem inherently. I was informed by a co-worker that Jay-Z and Beyonce separate their married lives from their career lives to the absolute fullest extent they can muster. I find this to be asinine. His comment about not being mad because she has 6 grammys and she smells good is very telling.

/woke my wife up to tell her about my first link
//What is the proper way to celebrate one's first approved link?
///surprise buttsecks?

interesting, first off, u actually think ANYONE believes u have a co-worker who's 'in the know' on these topics? 2nd, how 'telling' is it that he said he's not mad, she has 6 grammy's, and that his (extremely hot) wife smells good? what's so, 'telling' as you say? see, you make a(n) (unfounded)comment and back it up with 'proof' from the friend of a cousin of a brother of a co-worker u know. yea, that's reputable.

Burn_Atlanta: srhp29: I used Trend Micro at home and have never had a problem. I dumped Symantec when it failed at warning/stopping Vondu from ruining my last machine.

I use a Mac, don't have any AV programs or firewall (other than what's native to OSX) and haven't had a problem for the 10 years I've been on a Mac.

Yeah, I cut my dick off, now I don't get STD's.

bankssurething: galactus5000: bankssurething: 'asinine'

Shut up right now. Seriously, how freaking hard is it to use full words - you aren't texting your BFF.

aww, poor baby upset cuz u cant read???? ur a joke. how bout i jst use mltple abbrev so tht it esp pisses u off evn mre. i choose to type how i want 2 type, if u have a problem with it, take it with fark and have me banned, biatch ass.

I can read it. As an English teacher, the fact that people willingly choose to present themselves as such a moron just baffles me. And the fact that you seem to be proud of it baffles me further.

Welcome to my blocklist, retard.

Hugh_Janus: But the Halo hitmaker insists Jay-Z wasn't angry with her for the slip, revealing: "He said you have six Grammys and you smell good."

SUBMITTER FAIL!!!THIS.

Tag is for subtard.

i did not RTFA, but that is a most excellent headline.

my only problem with it is my personal disappointment that i understood it.

I seriously and honestly hope that my biggest problem in life is Beyonce telling the world how much she loves me.